Bondage (7 page)

Noah nodded. "I guess we should hear what the rules are, but I just want to say that the idea of sex inclusive of Phan is very appealing, too. I really don't want you to think I'm not looking forward to the perks of you moving in, Phan." Noah winked at him.

Phan winked back and grinned, but didn't say anything. He'd been watching both Noah and Tobias, steadily eating his pizza and wiping his hands after every piece. Tobias had an idea that Phan really wasn't going to say much about whatever he and Noah decided; he was just grateful to be there.

Tobias ate his entire slice of pizza before replying, letting both of them sit and wait. He was debating if he should explain each rule or just lay them out and let Noah and Phan pick and choose which ones they wanted to talk about. That could be informative, he figured, so when the pizza was gone he reached for a napkin and calmly wiped his fingers clean.

"Noah and I will continue as we have been. Phan, you and I will only have penetrative sex in-scene for a while. Neither of you will penetrate the other without my express permission -- that includes fingers and toys. However, you can suck each other blind if you want, whenever you feel like it. Well, so long as I get mine, anyway. If I feel like it, I'll probably order one of you not to come for several days -- and as of now, neither of you are allowed to get off alone. That means no morning fun in the shower, no stroking off alone. Questions?"

"In-scene only?" Noah blinked at him.

"In-scene only," Tobias confirmed. "And probably not for a while, either. We haven't played that way at all for..."

"Years," Phan said.

Noah closed his pizza box and groaned, patting his stomach. "But... Phan and I can give each other head whenever we want?" He seemed to be puzzling out Tobias' motives.

"Yes. Feel free to start right after you digest," Tobias invited.

"Cool," Phan grinned. "Nothing like fostering affections."

"Ah." Noah laughed and winked at Phan. "You're good."

"I've had practice -- Bradford wouldn't let me out of his sight, and you wouldn't believe some of the scheming I've heard Doms planning." His gaze slid to Tobias. "You didn't hear that."

"Didn't hear a thing. And you won't tell a thing."

"Tell what?"

"Exactly."

Noah looked like he might turn purple. "Well, that hardly seems fair."

Phan looked at him pityingly. "Noah. What the Dom doesn't know, he can't whip your ass for. But if you're going to make a big deal out of it, it makes it hard to whisper in your ear later, and we both get stripes. Shut up and wait until lights out, 'kay?"

Tobias raised an eyebrow and looked at Noah. "You didn't spend a lot of time ganging up on your parents with your sisters, did you?"

"Are you kidding?" Noah snorted. "My sisters always ganged up on me."

"They were trading secrets in the dark," Phan told him. "And now you, pretty boy, have a brother of sorts to swap tales with. But we gotta do it on the sly, see? Can't let the man know. Just between us."

Tobias was fairly sure he'd never heard a worse fake noir accent.

Noah snorted and shook his head. "Do you know, I don't think I have a single secret from the man? I'm going to be terrible at keeping them." He finished his Coke. "So, the rules are understood, by the way."

Tobias nodded. "Good. Phan?"

"Got it. No hands, no cock, but I can suck. Yay!"

Tobias rolled his eyes and got a faintly apologetic look.

"Sorry," Phan said. "Sleep, food, and sugar. Oh, and the whole here thing. I'm a little floaty."

"And Noah's a little exhausted," Tobias said with a smile. He kind of liked floaty Phan. "A couple more things, then. Tomorrow we'll figure out what to do with this place. Until we move, though, I think it'll be a little cramped here for all three of us, and to be totally honest, I'm not sure if just me and Phan living here is a good idea. Thoughts?"

"Phan can stay with me at my place, but you've got him Wednesdays and Thursdays, Tobias; you're going to have at least two nights alone -- unless you send him back late."

"Up to you, sweetheart. It's your feelings I'm thinking of here."

"I've already agreed to you having penetrative sex in-scene only, which presumably will take place whether I'm present or not? I'm not naive enough to think you're not going to want him in your bed if he stays the night, Tobias, but you'll stick to that rule and I'm... okay with that. I think. Yes, I'm okay with that, but I'll miss you." He smiled at Tobias. "The weekends are mine, after all."

Tobias smiled and shook his head. "You two are bending over backward not to hurt each other. Really, it's a nice thing to see, but it gets in the way. All right, Phan, welcome back to service, in which I push you around and give you a lot of orders. And send you off in a chauffeured car after soundly taking a crop to your ass twice a week. Better make sure he has a key, Noah."

Noah did a passable job of hiding his relief. Phan might have been fooled, but Tobias wasn't. "Will do. You gonna clean my place, Phan?" Noah asked with a chuckle.

"Probably," Phan said easily. "I get bored. Got dust bunnies? I'm great with dust bunnies."

"They're hopping around under the bed as we speak."

"Oh, spry little bunnies. Cool. Maybe I'll start a bunny farm. Give Crispin something to stomp on."

Noah shook his head and looked at Tobias. "This might be an adventure I wasn't counting on. Anything else on your list?"

Tobias shook his head. "No, I think I'm done, though I fear for your dust bunnies now. Anything on your mind?"

"Yeah." Noah nodded. "A couple of things. We're still on for the occasional night-out scenes?" he asked Tobias.

"Oh, yes," Tobias nodded. "Absolutely."

"Okay. What about social functions, like club activities or parties?"

Tobias tilted his head. "Well, you're my sub. Anything addressed to me plus guest is you, I assume. Bradford will likely invite the three of us. Did you have anything specific in mind?"

"No, I just wanted to know how you thought you would handle invitations... if you were planning on taking us both out, or just one of us."

"It would depend on the event," Tobias said. He leaned forward. "Noah. You're my sub. I have no definition of what Phantom is becoming, none of us do. But unless or until I contract with him, you're it. I won't leave you home alone, and likely won't leave him either -- hell, Jean-Pierre would happily come over to take Phan to a party with us."

Noah laughed. "Jean-Pierre would love Phan." He seemed to like Tobias' answer.

"Michel would hate him," Tobias said with a wink. "Phan's prettier."

"Who's Michel?" Phan asked. "And I don't mind staying home."

"Liar," Tobias said with a smile. "You live to show off."

"Well, yeah. But not if it's going to make Noah unhappy."

"We're so damn ingratiating it's starting to give me a headache," Noah joked. At least, Tobias thought he was joking. Mostly. "What about you, Phan? What's on your list?"

"Money. Apparently, I have some. I'm better at saving than I thought, and Bradford took my accounts and did... something. I don't know. Anyway, I want to buy groceries and stuff."

Tobias groaned and sank into his chair.

Noah just grinned. "Phan, could you try explaining to Tobias why it's important that we contribute to the household? He doesn't get it. I had this same argument about the mortgage."

Phan blinked. "Um, 'cause a person has to feel like they're contributing? Like they're productive and a part of something? Because it's good manners?"

Tobias held up a hand. "I will not get into this. You want to buy groceries, fine. Noah wants to pay for the house, fine. Write me a check, I'll deal. Badly. And I'll frown a lot. And maybe pout."

"I gave up, Phan. He's not even trying to understand it anymore."

"But he'll take the money, right?"

"Yes, but you know what he's going to do with it. No grocery store or lender is ever going to see it."

"What did I tell you about talking in the dark?" Phan scolded. "And, yeah, I know. But I'll still feel better, and I can still do some actual shopping. Wanna come with?"

"Sounds good." Noah started packing up pizza boxes. "So money... anything else? Are the fundamental things you were missing with Bradford going to be met here? What else do you need?"

"I need to know that I can come back after therapy and fall apart safely for an hour or so. I need to know that I'll be disciplined. I need to know that I'm safe." Phan looked around the room and said softly, "I need to know that I matter."

"You matter, Phan," Tobias said, just as softly. "You matter a great deal."

"This entire evening is about you, Phan. Believe me, you matter, hon." Noah kissed him on his way to the kitchen with the pizza boxes. "And you can fall apart all you like at my place." He disappeared into the kitchen.

"You can, you know," Tobias said quietly. He slid out of his chair onto the floor and sat with his back against it. "You can fall apart now, if you want."

Phan shook his head. "Don't want to now. It's a good day."

"Okay. Then you can let me hold you for a minute. I'd like that."

Phan hesitated for a moment, then scooted over and leaned against him as Tobias put an arm over his shoulders.

Noah returned and collected plates and napkins and other remnants of dinner. "You okay, hon?" he asked Phan, picking up his empty glass.

Phan nodded. "Just... not falling apart."

Noah let that go a moment and left the room again with his hands full. When he came back he had a box of tissues that he casually dropped into Phan's lap before putting coffee mugs back on the tray. "You're allowed to fall apart if you need to."

"I know," Phan said. He nudged Tobias. "Is he always like this?"

"Yes, pretty much," Tobias said with a smile.

"Cool." Phan wiggled a little more and pressed closer. "I can really stay?"

"Yes."

"Thank you," Phan whispered. "Thank you so much."

Tobias squeezed him a little but didn't say anything.

After a moment Phan said, "Noah's tired."

"He is. He was up all night because I didn't call. I thought he'd be asleep, so I didn't call, because I thought I'd wake him."

Phan groaned. "Okay. I'm going to go lie down in the guest room. You make him go to sleep. Do we start tomorrow?"

"What day is tomorrow?" Noah asked, coming back from the kitchen yet again and yawning. "Oh, Thursday, is that right? I have counseling tomorrow night, so you two will be on your own. I brought enough stuff to get me through the weekend, so we can all stay here again tomorrow night."

"Okay." Phan kissed Tobias' cheek quickly and moved away, rolling to his feet. "Thank you, Noah," he said softly, one hand sliding up Noah's arm. "Get some sleep."

"Come here." Noah grabbed him by the front of his shirt and tugged him close. "You're welcome," he said, and then he kissed Phan soundly on the lips before letting him go. "Sleep well, hon."

"I will," Phan said with a grin. "Try not to yell too loud." He skipped away and darted down the hall, laughing.

"I don't think yelling is in the cards tonight," Noah said softly, stepping into Tobias' arms.

"That's just fine by me," Tobias said. "I've missed you, pet. Come to bed and let me hold you."

Noah surveyed the living room one more time and nodded, then let Tobias steer him down the hall toward the bedroom. "Carol made fun of me all day."

"She did? What did she say?" Tobias asked.

"Oh, about how tired I was, and who kept me up all night. She totally got the wrong impression." He started to strip before they were through the bedroom door.

"Did she?" Tobias asked, bemused as Noah continued to lose his clothes on the way to the bed. "Thought it was all hot sex?"

Noah flopped on the bed in nothing but his briefs. "I think she was hoping for a good story."

"The poor thing," Tobias said absently. He tugged the blankets out from under Noah and urged him to get into bed properly. "You do realize that it's only six-thirty, yes? You're going to be awake damn early."

"It's what?" Noah blinked his eyes open.

"It's six-thirty."

"Okay so wake me up in two hours and..." Noah yawned. "And we'll fuck."

Tobias chuckled. "We'll see," he said, starting to undress. "Go to sleep, pet." He stripped off his clothes, leaving them in a pile on a chair and slipped into bed. He tugged Noah to him and buried his face in Noah's hair. "Love you," he whispered.

"Love you, too, baby." Tobias could feel him already drifting off.

With a smile he stroked a hand down Noah's back and just held him as Noah fell asleep. Tobias stared at the ceiling, listening to Noah breathe, and kept his own breathing light and even, even as his mind began to race. It was the first real chance he'd had to think all day, and he found himself wondering what the hell he'd gotten himself into.

He loved Noah. He and Noah had a balance and connection he hadn't had before; everything worked. But he couldn't -- simply couldn't -- leave Phantom to sink as he'd seemed ready to. He knew that he could help Phan, could work with him to get the boy into a better frame of mind... but he worried that by doing so he'd overwhelm himself.

Two subs would take a great deal of energy and work. Despite their very careful speeches about Phantom not having the same status as Noah, it was what it was -- Phan was a sub, he was a Dom, and no matter what way it was cut, Tobias now had two subs, even without Phan having a contract.

Tuesday nights off was looking better and better.

He lay with Noah sleeping in his arms and started planning how he could best get Phan through the crisis point; once that was done, things would settle a bit and the three of them would see where everything stood. He hoped, anyway. He reminded himself that Noah had strong affection for Phan, and that Noah had initiated this -- perhaps without thinking it all through, but out of good intentions, certainly. The only thing Tobias could do was to make it work. That was his responsibility.

He made a mental note to plan affirmation sessions with both of the boys weekly and request a weekly talk for the three of them in the safe room, where they could discuss how things were going.