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Authors: Maggie Shayne

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Raven shook her head slowly, but her eyes burned with tears of worry for the woman she sensed she had never really met until tonight.

 

Chapter 21

"Nic, come on, wake up."

I heard Duncan's voice just before my body went rigid, and the life force flooded back into me. Then I went limp, lying still on the damp ground, opening my eyes slowly.

Before me were a massive machine with flashing lights, and men wielding lengths of soft tubing that spouted water at the house. The house ... Arianna's home was a sodden, charred mass now. A ruin. Tongues of flame shot forth still, but the fire was nearly extinguished. The sight of it stirred some memory. A brief glimpse of a similar scene from the distant past. A flicker, then gone, leaving me with a sickening feeling in my stomach. I turned my head, not wishing to look on that sight any longer, only to see Arianna lying beside me on the ground. Still.

"Arianna?" I sat up immediately, moving closer, bending over her. Her face was dusted with soot, her hair dulled with it. I touched her face, lifting n.y gaze to her sister's. "I do not understand. I pushed her from the window."

"But you were still inside," Raven said softly. "She went back in after you. We couldn't stop her."

Something twisted in my heart. "She could have burned," I whispered. I gathered her limp body gently into

my arms, pulling her upright, so she rested against my chest. One hand at the small of her back, one cupping her head and holding it to my shoulder, I rocked her back and forth. "You're such a fool, little cat. Risking death for a man you say you do not love. I think you lie."

As I held her, she went stiff, sucking in a great gasp, then relaxing in my arms once more as she came awake. "Nicodimus?" she whispered, her voice hoarse.

"Right here. It is all right. Everyone is safe." As I said it, I realized I had not seen Nidaba, and sent a questioning glance over Raven's shoulder to Duncan.

The man nodded. "Yes, everyone got out of the house."

Good. Nidaba was likely frightened by the noise and lights and people. She was probably hiding somewhere nearby.

One of the men who'd been fighting the fire came toward us with a stack of blankets. "The house is lost," he said, and his voice was thickly laced with a Scottish lilt. "But there be rooms for you at the inn. No charge. An' by the time you get there, you'll find a change o' clothes a'waitin'. Some o' the local ladies keep such things on hand for emergencies such as this."

"That's very kind. Thank you," Raven said.

In my arms, Arianna was still shaking. Still, I thought, trying to sort through the confusion in her mind. I'd been here with this woman for several days now. And with each one that had passed, my feelings for her had grown. All the suspicions, all the instinctive sense that I must not trust her, and even the knowledge that she had indeed been somehow involved with my death, did nothing to dampen the feelings growing wild within me. There was something about her. Her keen mind and quick wit. Her boldness and intelligence. Her kindness and generosity. Her temper—even that drew me to her. She was small and quick and, I sensed, passionate. I had made love to this woman once, though the memory of it was vague and sketchy now. Knowing it only served to make me want her more, a desire that burned hot within my soul, and seemed to grow daily. But it was

more than lust I felt for this woman. A great deal more ... perhaps more than she wanted me to feel.

I felt it all the same, and sensed she did as well. And I would tell her so, if only she would let me.

It was, however, something she did not wish to hear. And I would respect her wishes. For now. Only for now. She loved me, though she might deny it. I knew that. She had risked her life to save mine tonight. She loved me. She simply needed time to accept the idea.

I took one of the blankets from the stack the man had left with us, and wrapped it around her shoulders, brushing ash from her hair.

"Nic, we um... we need to talk. Something has happened," Duncan said.

Arianna's head came up, her eyes alert now, and searching the area around us. "Where is Nidaba?" she asked.

Raven averted her eyes. "Nidaba ... told me some things a few moments ago. Things you both need to know ... especially you, Nic''

I frowned, wishing Nidaba would show herself and ease this sudden kernel of worry that seemed to be gnawing at my belly. "What did she tell you?" I asked.

Licking her lips, Raven lifted her gaze to meet mine. "She... she's always been very close to you, hasn't she? Very protective of you."

I nodded. "Yes. Sometimes to the extreme."

"But she's never told you why, has she?"

"No."

Raven bit her lip, nodded slowly. "I didn't think so. Do you know why you were born into this lifetime as an immortal High Witch, Nic?"

I nodded. "Of course. I must have died trying to save the life of another, in the lifetime before."

"Right. Well, Nidaba ... she was the one whose life you saved."

I blinked in surprise, glancing quickly at Arianna. She said, "It doesn't surprise me. I always knew there was an incredible bond between you two."

"More than you could even guess," Duncan said.

I glanced his way. Raven cleared her throat. "Nic ... When you died to save her life, Nidaba was ..."

"Was...?" I prompted, when she stopped mid-sentence.

"She was your mother."

I heard Arianna's soft gasp, even as Raven's words made their way to my ears. It felt as if my heart jumped into my throat. I parted my lips, but could not speak, could not even breathe for a moment.

"Sweet Goddess," Arianna whispered. "Your mother... Oh, it all makes so much sense now."

The large vehicles began to rumble away. My gaze seemed to search the darkness around us as if I were seeking some sense, some explanation that could be found there. There was none, of course. There was the house, reduced to smoking, sodden ash and charred beams that dripped and hissed away the last of their heat. There was Arianna's driving machine sitting out of harm's way, and apparently untouched by the flames. There were three people watching me as everything I had believed in my life simply melted away beneath a revelation too shocking to comprehend.

And there was Arianna, still in my arms. I suddenly held her more tightly. "My mother," I whispered, staring at Raven in disbelief. "She said this?"

"Yes. She was your mother, an immortal High Witch, but she didn't even know that at the time. You were nine years old, she said, when she was attacked by some soldier. ... She didn't say why. Just that you leapt in front of her, and were killed by a blow from his sword. And that it was a very long time before you were finally reborn in Scotland."

My head low, I shook it slowly. Arianna sat up slightly, and ran one palm gently over my cheek. "Why?" I asked of no one in particular. "Why would she not have told me these things ... ?" Arianna only shook her head, her big brown eyes wide with concern for me.

"I don't know why, Nic," Raven said. "But I think it's

true. "I... I know Nidaba is not in the best of mental health right now, but I saw her eyes when she was speaking, and ..." She drew a breath, then nodded hard. "She was speaking from the heart, I know that much."

"No wonder she hated me so much," Arianna said. I looked into Arianna's eyes, saw the pain there, the reflection of my pain, and perhaps Nidaba's as well. So caring, this woman. The most caring I'd ever known. "I understand everything now," she said.

"I do not," I told her. Reluctantly I released Arianna's small, warm body, and got to my feet. "I must speak to Nidaba. Where is she now?"

Raven and Duncan exchanged a worried glance. Then Duncan extracted a small scrap of paper from somewhere beneath the blanket wrapped around him, and handed it to me. I frowned down at the words ... English, I thought but unfamiliar to me. I could not read what was written there.

"We only left her alone for a minute... just long enough to pull you two out of that basement,'' Duncan said. "I guess that's when he got to her."

My head came up fast, and just as quickly, Arianna jumped to her feet beside me, and snatched the note from my hands.

"Marten," she whispered.

"Marten?" The name brought his image clearly back to my mind. My nemesis. My onetime brother-in-law, and lifelong enemy. "That bastard is still alive? Damn him. Are you saying ... Gods, are you saying he has taken Nidaba?''

"It looks that way," Duncan said. "Read him the note, Arianna. Maybe he can make some sense of it."

Arianna met my gaze, and I saw her reluctance. But she nodded, and read aloud. " 'Nicodimus, I have taken your precious Nidaba. I will kill her if I must, but I fear taking the heart of a lunatic might well infect me with her madness. Still, I will risk that, if you force me. I am willing, however, to make a trade. Nidaba, unharmed, for you, Nicodimus. Come alone, old friend. You know where to find me. Marten.' "

I stopped my pacing and lifted my head. "But
.. .I do not
know where to find him. What..." Then I let my question die on my lips and gazed at Arianna. She looked quickly away, shielding her eyes from my probing stare.

"Arianna, if you know what this means, tell me."

She only shook her head, still not meeting my eyes. "I don't know."

"You must know!" I went to her, gripped her shoulders, and stared into her eyes. "Arianna, please."

"I don't know, Nicodimus. It must be something from the past, something you still haven't remembered. But if it is, it's something I didn't know about."

I saw something in her eyes. A shadow that seemed to hide her soul from me. I did not know if she were telling me the truth, or why she would want to lie. I did not feel as if I knew anything just then. Everything I'd ever believed seemed to have been shaken to the core by Raven's revelations. "I must find her," I whispered.

"We'll find her," Duncan said, his voice firm and strong. "He can't have taken her far. Arianna, maybe you can at least give us a physical description of this Marten character to go on."

Arianna nodded, but I saw the way her jaw was set, and the determination in her eyes. I also saw the suspicion with which Raven was eyeing her. She, too, thought Arianna knew more than she was saying.

But why? Gods, could she be jealous of my affection for Nidaba still? Even knowing the woman had been my mother?

My mother. Gods, I could not get over it. Nidaba, my own mother.

"So what is it, exactly, that you're keeping from Nic?" Raven asked.

Arianna looked up fast. Nicodimus and Duncan had gone off into the woods beyond the town in a hopeless attempt to track Marten and Nidaba. "I don't know what you mean...."

"You damned well do, and I won't let you deceive me,

Arianna. Not me, of all people. I know you better than anyone. I love you better than anyone, and I'm not going to let you get away with this any more than you would if our situations were reversed. Now what is it?"

Arianna dropped her gaze, unable to withstand the impact of her sister's accusing eyes. She was shaken, right to the core. All this time she'd been half convinced that Ni-daba wanted Nicodimus for herself. .. when she'd been his mother all along. Protecting him just as any mother would do for her son.

"You know where Marten took her, don't you?"

Arianna shrugged. "I have an idea."

"And you don't plan to let that poor woman die in Nic's place. I know you better than to think that. You're going to go after her yourself, aren't you? Aren't you, Arianna!"

Arianna sighed deeply, knowing better than to try to fool her sister on this point. "What choice do I have? She's his mother, Raven. He loves her, and he needs her, especially now."

"He loves
you,
Arianna."

"No. He thinks he does, but that will change once he remembers...."

"Oh, for the love of heaven, you're so blind! The man adores you! That's not going to change because of something that happened centuries ago."

Arianna shook her head. "If he goes after her himself, Marten will kill him. It's that simple. Hell, that snake would probably kill them both."

"And if you go after her, he'll kill you instead."

"No. I can beat him. Nidaba is unbalanced, and Nicodimus is still weak. But
I
can beat him, Raven. And I will— for Nicodimus. Just as you would do for Duncan. You know you would. Don't even try to deny it."

Raven lowered her gaze, unable to argue with that simple truth. "Yes. I would. Because I love him. And you love Nic the same way, don't you?"

A stabbing pain pierced Arianna's chest as she nodded. "Yes. I love him. But I can't have him, I can't make him love me, and I'm not going to try. I've made that mistake

before, but I learned from it. Yes, I love him.... I love him enough to let him go, Raven."

"And enough to die for him?"

Arianna didn't answer that. Instead, she just looked away.

"Fine, go after Marten in Nic's place if you must. But not alone. I'll go with you. And Duncan will, too. With three we'd have Marten outnumbered."

Keeping her gaze carefully averted, Arianna nodded. "You must promise not to tell Nicodimus. We'll have to slip away, without his knowledge. He's still not strong enough to do battle."

Raven eyed her warily. "All right. Agreed."

"Good then."

"Why do I get the feeling that was far too easy?"

Arianna shook her head and plastered a false smile on her face, hoping against hope her sister would believe her lies. "We'll go tomorrow. We both need rest after this night's mayhem."

"Yes. All right." Raven paced away, then back again.

"Let's get to the inn then. The fireman said they would have rooms for us."

"One room," Raven said. "One large room. I don't plan to let you out of my sight tonight, Arianna.''

Meeting her sister's gaze, Arianna murmured, "You're going to have to, love. I plan to spend this night in the arms of my husband. Just in case my plan goes wrong. It might be the last chance I ever have."

"Your... ?" Raven's eyes widened as she searched her sister's face.

Arianna simply nodded. "Nicodimus and I were married once, a long time ago. He doesn't remember it yet, but I do. I'll never forget." She lowered her head, to hide the color she felt staining her cheeks. "So give me this night with him. And tomorrow, we'll do what needs doing."

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