Authors: Jayne Blue
I looked up toward the ceiling and sighed. “I had a four
point.”
She slapped me harder. “I
knew
it. You son of a bitch.
You barely came to class. When you did you’d get called on. I remember you
sitting in the back of Mrs. Bonneville’s algebra class and when she called on
you, the whole class snickered. But then you solved one of her complex
formulas. She thought you cheated somehow. You just smirked and let everyone
keep on laughing. Like it was some inside joke. But you didn’t cheat, did you?”
I shrugged. It was as much an admission as I was willing to
give.
“Well,” I said. “Sometimes it’s just a hell of a lot easier
meeting expectations than it is to change them.”
Nicole’s eyes glistened. “I know. It was the same for me. I
had everything. I know that. I know it’s easier being the person everyone likes
and wants to be around. The Homecoming Queen. Sure. I liked it. Who wouldn’t?
But when things happened with my mother, and then my father, it was all
bullshit. No one stuck around. I got nothing but gossip and pity. All those
girls who buzzed around me disappeared.”
“People are assholes.”
She laughed again and the light came back into her eyes. “They
really, really are. And you said something to me. You accused me of going
slumming that night.”
“Yeah. I’m sorry. Maybe that was a low blow.”
“It was. And sure, there was some truth to it. I was hurt and
I wanted to lash out at that idiot Derek. But I don’t have so little respect
for myself or you to use you like that or let you use me. That would have been
too easy. The truth is, you
interested
me, Brax. Sure. It was all the
things you said. You were dark and scary. But you were also beautiful and
strong. I had this fantasy that you could
handle
things. You know?”
I pulled away from her a little. She
was
talking about
some fantasy. She was right though. But my ability to handle things wasn’t some
pretty fairytale. What I handled was dark and ugly. The kind of thing that
should never touch a woman like Nicole.
Darkness settled around me. She might be a different person
than I thought, but she still had mostly light inside of her. What would she
think of me if she knew everything about who I was and what I’d done?
I straightened my back and pulled away. “You should get
dressed. I need to get you back.”
“Brax? What did I say?”
I shook my head. She slid off the counter and came to me,
reaching up to thread her fingers through my hair. God, she felt so good. She
smelled
so good. And that was the problem. No matter what shit her life had served
her, it couldn’t touch her. She was still good and pure and she belonged far away
from me. Except I
wanted
her.
“Don’t,” she said. “I know what you’re doing and I won’t put
up with it. I’m a grown-up. I’m not an eighteen-year-old cheerleader anymore.”
Then she winked and went up on her toes to kiss me again. She tugged my earlobe
and whispered, sending a shiver up my spine.
“Although I do still have the outfit.”
She made that little squeal I loved when I swatted her ass
again.
Nicole
That morning, I figured out my second most favorite thing to
do with Brax Anderson. I loved wrapping my arms around his waist, inhaling the
spice-and-leather scent of his jacket while I straddled the back of his Harley.
I held on for dear life as we flew through the winding turns outside of town.
We took the long way around from his house back to my shop using looping roads
that skirted Lincolnshire. I’d never even been down some of them despite living
here my whole life. But with Brax’s strong back beneath my cheek and my thighs
pressed against his, he helped me see this town in a new light. All the parts
that were wild, rough, and beautiful. From the rolling hills of the dairy farms
near the Michigan border to the high smoke stacks of the industrial parks and
manufacturing plants as we neared downtown.
Brax seemed to own the road as he took a hairpin curve. I
think he did it on purpose so I’d have to squeeze him even tighter. He threw
his head back and laughed when I squealed. The churning waters of the Maumee
River far below frightened me as we crossed the Liberty Bridge. I’d driven over
it a thousand times, but had never felt connected to it like I did now.
By the time we finally made the turn toward the town square, I
was breathless. My hair wild and my skin flushed. He pulled his bike into the
alley behind the parlor and cut the engine. I peeled off my helmet and set it
on the seat as I dismounted, feeling rubber-legged.
I went into his arms and it felt as natural as if we’d been
together our whole lives. “You smell good,” I said, pressing my cheek against
his chest. Brax was leather and soap with the sharp, crisp smell of bleach from
his white t-shirt. There was that hint of male musk beneath all of that. He
made me feel safe, protected. It should have shocked me how much I wanted to be
with him. I’d thought giving into it last night would get it out of my system.
It didn’t though. It only made me want him more.
“You sure you’re okay?” he said, kissing the top of my head.
“Mmm. I’m just thinking about how much I wish we could have
just stayed in bed.”
The vibration of his sinful laugh skittered against my ear.
Quick as a snake, he had his hand inside my dress again, tweaking my sore, well-used
nipple. “Not a bad plan. Unfortunately, we’ve both still gotta work for a
living. I’ll pick you up this weekend though.”
It was a statement, not a question. I smiled at the hint of
lust flashing in his eyes. A whole weekend with Brax Anderson and I might not
be able to walk for days. He laughed again and I swear it was like he could
read my mind.
“Don’t ever play poker,” he said. “Everything you’re thinking
comes across in your eyes and the way you hold your mouth.”
“Oh really?”
He took my chin with his thumb and tilted my head to kiss me.
“Yeah. I kinda like the way you hold your mouth.”
I blushed from the roots of my hair to the tips of my toes. He’d
gotten the pleasure of my mouth more than once last night. I slapped his chest.
“Maybe I have plans this weekend, Mr. Anderson.”
His face grew serious. “Change them.”
I thought about teasing him more, I liked when he went all
alpha male on me. Before I could though, he leaned down and kissed me again,
driving all other thought out of my mind but
yes
,
oh yes and more
please
!
“The weekend is three days away. You sure you can live without
me that long?”
Brax groaned and it sent a new flash of heat through me. “It’s
going to be rough. I won’t lie. But unfortunately, yeah. My prez is coming back
into town and club business is going to keep me pretty busy until then. In the
meantime, though, watch out for yourself, okay? I don’t think Daryl Hodges is
dumb enough to bother you again. Now that he knows I’m sort of involved. But I
don’t want you taking any chances. If Doug calls and asks you to meet him
somewhere, don’t go. You call me first. Promise?”
I nodded. “I promise. And I know. I won’t do anything stupid like
going to
The Shires
by myself again. I learned my lesson.”
“Good girl. And don’t give him any
money,
for God’s
sake.”
I saluted. “Not much chance of that. Everything I have is tied
up in this shop. I’m not exactly flush with cash. That’s the thing Doug has
never been able to grasp. He thinks there’s this secret stash of loot
somewhere. Whatever savings I
did
have I used to pay the note on the
building.”
Brax nodded. “Okay. I’ll see you in a couple of days then. As
long as you promise to call me if you need anything.”
I went up on my toes and kissed him. Then I smoothed a long
strand of blond hair out of his eyes. He gave me another playful swat on the
ass and revved the Harley. Mmm. I liked the sound of that too. Strong, male,
Brax. I waved as he drove away. I went inside only after he made the turn on
Main Street and went out of my line of sight. I could still hear the rumble of
his engine long after that though.
I made it two steps into the kitchen before I stopped cold.
Melinda stood with her arms crossed and a knowing smile on her face. The breath
went out of my lungs as I realized she’d watched everything from the window and
there was no point trying to make up a story.
“Busted,” she said, in case I still planned to try.
I smiled and threw up my hands in surrender. “Sorry. I mean
I’m
really
sorry for leaving you high and dry last night.”
Melinda laughed as she heaved a large cardboard container of Rocky
Road on the counter. “Are you kidding me? He looks worth every minute of it. Is
that who I think it is?”
I shrugged. This was an odd development for me. I’d grown so
used to keeping my private life private, I wasn’t sure how to answer her. In
fact, if I were honest with myself, I
had
no private life. I had this
business. Melinda and the rest of the staff were the only people I dealt with
on a day-to-day basis besides Doug. It had been so much easier that way after
everything that happened with my father. They say hard times like that show you
who your real friends are. In my case, that had been starkly true. The
investors my father had swindled had been the parents of some of
my
closest friends. Though no one blamed me personally, he’d ruined some of their
lives. So I got painted with the brush of his sins and there wasn’t a damn
thing I could do about it. The money he’d taken was long gone and I could never
repay it.
And my father hadn’t been the only man who’d ever let me down.
What I told Brax had been the truth. Derek Moyer had just been one of a long
line of men who’d betrayed me since and including my father. Being alone was
safer and easier.
“Nicole?” Melinda put a hand on my shoulder, pulling me out of
my thoughts.
“What? I’m sorry. Oh. You asked me if that was who you thought
it was?”
“Right. You’re dating a Great Wolf?”
I opened my mouth to answer then froze. Dating wasn’t really
the term for what Brax and I did. In fact, it almost seemed absurd. But I
hesitated a fraction of a second too long and Melinda’s face split into a
knowing smile.
“Dayum, Nicole. I’m impressed!”
“What? Oh. No. God. It’s not what you think. Brax and I are
just . . . old friends really. I’ve known him since high school.”
Melinda nodded her head and raised a brow as she restocked the
next flavor. I would have said more but the day shift started to pile in. Chris
was back, followed by Wendy and Steve. We had three more high-school kids
coming in later but Tuesdays were usually a fairly slow day.
“Well, I approve! I hadn’t realized it until just now, but I
don’t think I’ve seen you smile like that since . . . um . . . well, maybe
ever. It looks good on you.”
It was in me to cover like I always do. Minimize. Shield. But
for once I didn’t. Melinda had become the closest thing to a friend I had
lately and so I said, “You know what? Thanks. I actually did have a good time
last night. I’m sure I’ll end up paying for it one way or another because
that’s just how the universe works for me, but yeah. It felt good.”
Then Melinda did something that nearly knocked me off my feet.
She crossed the distance between us and hugged me. Hot tears instantly sprang
to my eyes as I stiffened from the embrace. I blinked them away and tried to
get a hold of myself before Melinda pulled away and could see, but I wasn’t
fast enough.
“Nicole, you deserve a little bit of happiness. You get that,
right?”
I took a step back. My throat ached as I tried to swallow. I pasted
on the smile I used to protect myself and flapped a dismissive hand.
“I’m serious. I see you. I mean . . . I
see
you. You’ve
been holding on so tight for so long it’s good to see you let loose a little. I
must say though when you
do
let loose it’s just . . . wow.” She pointed
back toward the alley with her thumb.
Then I laughed, a deep, genuine belly laugh that chased away
the awkward feeling and lump in my throat. The moment passed and a part of me
was a little bit sad for it. I’d gone so long without having someone to share
good news with. I’d also gone far too long without having someone to share bad
things with.
Something dark flickered inside of me as I stood in front of
that ice cream case. Old patterns really are hard to break. It felt good to
unload everything on Brax last night. But he’d shouldered it. I couldn’t
pretend to know who he was or what he’d done in the last fifteen years. I
wasn’t naïve. I knew the reputation of the Great Wolves M.C. And he wasn’t
wrong: in a different time, my father
would
have lost it if he’d known
I’d spent any time at all with Brax. But my father had long ago lost the right
to pass judgment on anything I did. Still, trusting Brax may have been the most
dangerous thing I could have done. Not because of the club, but because I’d
just given him the power to hurt me and let me down. If my track record were
anything to go by, then he definitely would.
“Relax,” Melinda said. And maybe Brax was right. All my
thoughts were written all over my face when I let my guard down. “I mean, he’s
not proposing marriage or anything, right? You’re just having a good time.
Enjoy it.”
Smiling, I took the ice cream scoop out of Melinda’s hand and
jabbed it into the Peppermint Swirl.