Authors: Ellie Grace
I was no longer content to just be content. I was no longer drifting through an average life. Now, I was surrounded by people who loved and supported me, and were always there for me. They had taught me the most valuable lesson of all – that not all family is bonded by blood. A true family is made up of the people who are with you through good times and bad, whenever you need them, regardless of DNA. Not because they feel obligated to, but because they
want
to be. My family tree may have been sparse, but I had all the family I would ever need, and more.
I’d brought my camera along to the beach, and I couldn’t resist snapping pictures and capturing the happiness of the most important people in my life. Dex and Nate were chasing a screaming, laughing Sadie around on the beach while Amy stood back, observing them with a blissful smile on her face.
Also on the beach was Nora, sitting on Jake’s lap with her back pressed against his chest while he whispered in her ear, holding her protectively in his arms. Dex and I had grown very close with them, and despite the fact that Nora and I had been friends and roommates for four years, in a lot of ways, we were only now truly getting to know each other. We had been mere shadows of ourselves during those years together in college, both of us trudging down the paths that we felt obligated to follow because we feared what would happen if we shifted our course. Fortunately, we had both found our way to where we were meant to be.
My grandmother was standing with Dex’s parents, happily chatting away as if they’d known each other for years. Gram was like that, though. She had such a big heart and a kind soul, as well as a tough-as-nails attitude that I admired. We’d been spending a lot of time together since she came back into my life, and I was grateful for every day we shared. I was also starting to get to know my half-sister, Harper. We were taking it slow, one step at a time, but I hoped to eventually be part of her life in a real way. She was a great girl, I could already tell, and I’d been surprised at how open and welcoming she was to the idea of getting to know me. Part of me had expected her to have some animosity toward me because we shared a father, but she was nothing like that. I got the sense that she was closer to Gram than she was to her parents, and didn’t spend a lot of time at her own home. Hopefully someday she would learn, like I did, that you choose your own family. You choose who matters to you and who you want in your life.
Strong arms enveloped me from behind, pulling me against a hard chest and interrupting my stream of thoughts.
“Hey, baby,” Dex said, dropping a kiss to the curve of my neck.
Goosebumps tickled my skin as I sank into his welcoming grasp. “Hey, you,” I said. My body still reacted to him the same way it did when he first touched me, and I would never grow tired of that feeling. The warmth he brought me, from even the simplest look or briefest touch, made me feel more alive than anything else could.
“I’ve barely seen you all day, I needed a fix. I thought that you moving in meant I was supposed to get sick of you, not miss you more… What are you doing to me, woman?” he teased.
I turned around in his arms and looked up to meet his gaze. “I’m all yours tonight, if you want me…”
“Oh, I definitely want you.” His eyes flared with desire, burning into me as he lowered his mouth to mine. All of a sudden, I was counting the minutes until it was time to go home.
Living with Steven had been more of a chore than anything; something I put up with because it seemed like the logical thing to do. I’d always felt like I was suffocating being around him all the time, and frankly, I got fed up with him and his annoying habits. I would make excuses to get out of the house just so I could have some time alone.
It was nothing like that with Dex. With him, every day was an adventure. I never got sick of him and I missed him when he wasn’t around. He put a smile on my face every morning, made me laugh when I was in a bad mood… and of course, satisfied me every night. He gave me space when I needed it, which wasn’t often because the fact of the matter was, I was happier with him than without him.
We were open with each other about everything and there were no secrets or walls between us. No matter where we were, or who we were with, he always made me feel like I was the only one who existed to him. My heart was safe in his hands, and I trusted him with every part of me.
Dex was a regular at the group therapy sessions, and I couldn’t be more proud of him. They really seemed to be helping him, and the change in him was incredible. He still had the occasional nightmare, but they weren’t nearly as vivid and they no longer kept him up all night. The darkness that used to haunt his eyes was all but gone, and there was joy in them that I’d only ever caught glimpses of before.
Thinking about the future brought excitement and hope rather than fear and doubt. We were both healing. Healing from our pasts and helping each other move forward.
You can’t escape the past. It’s what makes you who you are and it remains a part of you. All you can do is accept it and move on. Choose to look forward instead of looking back. Make the past a part of your present and your future; a piece that you carry with you to remind yourself how you got to where you are and how far you’ve come.
Teddy’s parents had been right when they said that the greatest kinds of friends are the ones who bring out the best in one another. That’s what I had with Liv. She was my best friend, my confidante, my hero, my lover… my everything. We made each other stronger every day and together we could face anything.
Olivia’s ring was hidden in my sock drawer. For now. It wasn’t a matter of
if
I would ask, but
when
. The future was full of uncertainty, but the one thing I was sure of… was her.
She was my future.
Turn the page for an excerpt of Nora and Jake’s story,
This Time Around
, available now…
***
Nora Montgomery left home and heartbreak behind in South Carolina when she moved to New York City after her high school graduation. Now, four years later, she returns home and is forced to confront the past she left behind, and the reckless boy who broke her heart. It’s not long before the pieces of her past begin to blur with the present, and she realizes that the feelings she had for her first love never really went away. As old dreams resurface and new truths come to light, she begins to question the future she’s always planned on.
Jake Harris has spent four years regretting the night he let her get away. When she finally reappears in his life, he is determined to win her back and prove how much he’s changed. She might never forgive him for that night, but if he tells her the truth about what really happened, it will shatter the world she thought she knew. If he doesn’t, he might not get a second chance. He’s already lost her once and he won’t lose her again.
They come from two different worlds that are threatening to tear them apart… can they make it this time around?
***
When I first set foot outside the airport and got a taste of the fresh South Carolina air, I felt like I could finally breathe again. Like I’d been holding my breath underwater, and had finally reached the surface. I hadn’t realized how much I’d missed being down here. Well… maybe I’d realized it, but I certainly hadn’t let myself admit it. Over the last four years I’d become pretty accustomed to pushing my feelings aside; especially my feelings about home. I’d managed to stay away for as long as I could, but now the time was right. Besides, it would only be for a little while.
I spent the two hour drive with the windows down and the radio blaring in my rental car. Driving was one thing I had definitely missed. No one drove in New York City. Transportation consisted of flagging down cabs on the sidewalk or hopping onto the subway. Throw any kind of weather into the mix and forget it: you’d better be prepared to walk. After a few weeks in the city, and walking countless blocks in high heels, I’d learned to always carry flats in my purse.
Either way, no matter what form of transportation you used, you had to fight the hordes of people, all of whom were also in a rush to get wherever they were going. That was another thing; city people are always in a hurry, always moving. There never seems to be any time to just sit back and enjoy the ride before you’re rushing on to the next thing. Perhaps that’s why the last four years had gone by so fast.
In my hometown of Beaufort, South Carolina, things were completely different. It was a small southern town in the heart of Lowcountry, with a historic feel and the kind of scenic beauty that required you to slow down and enjoy it. Life seemed to move a little slower there, and I never truly realized it, or appreciated it, until I was thrown into the chaos of the city. New York was beautiful in its own way, but to me, it paled in comparison to the natural magnificence of the south. The feel of the cool coastal breeze on your face, the quiet shade of the towering live oak trees, and swinging off a rope into the refreshing water of the river on a hot day… there was nothing quite like it, especially in the city. At heart, I was still just a small town girl.
Regardless, my time in the city wasn’t over yet. At last week’s graduation ceremony I sat among the rest of my NYU classmates as we filled the endless sea of chairs, donning our violet caps and gowns, and baking under the hot sun as we waited to collect our diplomas. But, unlike many of my college peers who would be heading off to various parts of the country to begin the next chapter of their lives, my “higher education” chapter was still unfinished. When the summer was over, I would be heading back to NYU for my first semester of law school… and three more years of city living.