Breaking Brooklyn (24 page)
On the way home Jack starred in
about how he was not good enough for me. How he would only
complicate my life.
Boy was he right! I should have
listened but the way he said it made me more attracted to
him.
Facebook Message from Tyler Ward
10/7/2014:
We are always more attracted to
the things we cannot have.
Facebook Message from Brooklyn
Page Napier 10/7/2014:
Very true! When we got back to my
place things got really crazy. Jack had a meltdown. He told me how
I couldn't begin to understand what his life was like. Like he was
the only person who ever had it bad.
Then he starred punching the wall
an throwing furniture. I was so scared I was about to call the
police. I'm surprised my neighbors didn't!
When Jack finished his tantrum he
fell to the floor and crawled in to a fetal position and began to
cry. I sat down beside him and tried to calm him. That's when he
told me about the horrible things his step father did to
him.
It broke my heart.
Facebook Message from Tyler Ward
10/7/2014:
Wow!
Facebook Message from Brooklyn
Page Napier 10/7/2014:
Yeah, WOW is right! That's when we
got married.
Facebook Message from Tyler Ward
10/7/2014:
Is there someone in your life Jack
reminded you of?
Facebook Message from Brooklyn
Page Napier 10/7/2014:
I don't know. Maybe he reminded me
of myself.
Facebook Message from Tyler Ward
10/7/2014:
What do you mean?
Facebook Message from Brooklyn
Page Napier 10/7/2014:
Maybe I see a reflection of my own
sadness in Jack.
Facebook Message from Tyler Ward
10/7/2014:
That’s sad Brooke!
Facebook Message from Brooklyn
Page Napier 10/7/2014:
Unfortunately, that's
life.
Facebook Message from Tyler Ward
10/7/2014:
It doesn't have to be that way.
You deserve to be happy.
Facebook Message from Brooklyn
Page Napier 10/7/2014:
I know : (
Chapter
twenty-nine
“The sorrow we feel when we lose a
loved one is the price we pay to have had them in our lives.”
~ Rob Liano
Jack Napier - Day 56
After Brooke and I were married things were
rough for the first couple of years. I resented her for not
standing up to her parents and she resented me for never wanting to
visit her family. We quickly had kids thinking that would help. We
even moved Grandma Daisy into the house so she could help with the
kids. She was truly a blessing. The boys loved having her with them
every day and to me, her presence was like the old familiar pillow
I loved as a child.
It wasn't log after Grandma moved it that she
was diagnosed with cancer. The diagnosis was a vague explanation of
an out-of-control cell growth in Grandma’s left kidney. Treatment
was “iffy” at best, and might even cause additional complications.
We tried chemotherapy for a while, but it was awful. She wanted to
stop, and I couldn’t blame her. She told me she had reflected on
her life, and the legacy she was leaving behind more than satisfied
her. So, Grandma Daisy spent her remaining days with me and my
three boys. At this point Brooke was very elusive and I hardly saw
her anymore. She was not happy and I really don't know why. She
even started taking Prozac.
It was hard for me to watch Grandma Daisy's
health deteriorate. One day we were joking and watching a movie,
and the next day she was losing her balance and falling. Deep down
inside, I knew the end was coming.
A few weeks later, we purchased a wheelchair
for her and had a ramp built onto the front porch. It wasn’t long
before the dining room became her bedroom. The central location
made it easier to care for her when she was finally
bedridden.
The insurance company provided a part-time
nurse who came in the mornings and afternoons. Grandma Daisy would
fall into and out of consciousness while I sat at her
bedside.
One morning, I remember waking particularly
early. I walked to the kitchen, checking on her as I passed.
Charlie was sitting by her side, holding her hand. My heart lurched
at the sight of this gentle tableau. Grandma Daisy’s eyes were open
and she was staring at the cracks in ceiling. She knew that Charlie
was there but she struggled to turn her head to look at him. When
he was in her line of sight, she smiled. I started to tear up. She
was in extreme pain, yet she still smiled on those she
loved.
I joined Charlie at her side, and kissed her
on the forehead. My eyes drifted up to meet hers. For a moment
there was that twinkle that I loved so much.
“
Jack,” she said with a heavy
breath and watery eyes, “You’ve turned out to be a fine, fine man.
I couldn’t have asked...for anything better.”
“
Shhh, you need to save your
energy,” I said, fighting back my tears.
"There is something that is very important
that I need to tell you, Jack."
“
What is it, Grandma?"
Her face twisted in sorrow then she whispered,
"I am sorry you never had a father. I see the father you are to
your boys and I am so proud of you. And your mother is proud of you
too. I know you had your differences, but she loved you, Jack. She
was young and very confused when she had you, but she always loved
you. She just didn’t know how to show it.”
She swallowed and licked her dry lips as I
tried to mask the pain that showed on my face. Then Grandma Daisy
looked up and studied me, like she was trying to memorize every
detail of the moment. She struggled hard to smile.
That was my last memory of her. She died in
her sleep that night.
Grandma Daisy wanted to be cremated, and
insisted on having a small ceremony with only her immediate family.
She requested that her ashes be used while planting a tree in the
front yard of our house. I complied with her every wish except for
one.
When the day came to let her rest, I stood
before my family with Grandma Daisy's ashes in my hands. My voice
cracked, my eyes filled with wonderful memories of my guardian
angel. This was the first time my kids saw me openly weep. I told
her one last time what she meant to me.
“
When no one wanted me, you were
there to take me in. When I fell, you picked me up. Sometimes you
even carried me when I could no longer walk. You were always there.
You are my Guardian Angel. Everything that is good in me is because
of you and your sacrifices. True success is measured not by what we
possess but rather how much we are loved. You are the most
successful person I have ever known. I will miss you more that you
could ever imagine. Having you in my life has truly been a
blessing."
I then poured part of her ashes in the hole I
dug the night before, and planted a river birch among them. It was
her favorite tree. She loved the white flaking bark. I kept part of
her ashes to be buried with me when I die.
That was not part of her last wish, however, I
could not bear the thought of her being alone. I wanted to have her
by my side even in death.
I packed the loose dirt around the tree’s base
with my foot. When I noticed my boys watching me, I dropped the
shovel, and held out my arms to them. We hugged each other in one
monolithic embrace.
Brooke
Chapter thirty
“Sex is the consolation you have
when you can't have love.”
~ Gabriel Garcia
Facebook Message from Tyler Ward
10/1/2014 at 12:43 am:
Hey : (
Facebook Message from Brooklyn
Page Napier 10/1/2014 at 12:44 am:
What's wrong?
Facebook Message from Tyler Ward
10/1/2014 at 12:45 am:
I have writers block!
Facebook Message from Brooklyn
Page Napier 10/1/2014 at 12:46 am:
What are you stuck on?
Facebook Message from Tyler Ward
10/1/2014 at 12:48 am:
I'm trying to figure out the
underlining theme of my book? Right now it feels like my story has
ADHD lol
Facebook Message from Brooklyn
Page Napier 10/1/2014 at 12:49 am:
Hahaha! That's funny!
Facebook Message from Brooklyn
Page Napier 10/1/2014 at 12:51 am:
Why do you write? What is it about
writing that you love?
Facebook Message from Tyler Ward
10/1/2014 at 12:52 am:
It's my escape.
Facebook Message from Brooklyn
Page Napier 10/1/2014 at 12:54 am:
My escape is reading. Things are
so bad with Jack all I do is read and masturbate lol
Facebook Message from Tyler Ward
10/1/2014 at 12:55 am:
: o
Facebook Message from Brooklyn
Page Napier 10/1/2014 at 12:56 am:
How are things with you and
Kim?
Facebook Message from Tyler Ward
10/1/2014 at 12:59 am:
Nothing's really changed. I get
once a month maintenance sex as usual. I hope she's just going
through a phase. I can't imagine spending my 40s like this. I'm at
my sexual peak!
Facebook Message from Brooklyn
Page Napier 10/1/2014 at 1:01 am:
I don't know about Kim but these
last few years in my 30s, I've been randy as hell.
Facebook Message from Tyler Ward
10/1/2014 at 1:02 am:
Stop! Your killing me!
Facebook Message from Brooklyn
Page Napier 10/1/2014 at 1:03 am:
Are you getting excited
:--
Facebook Message from Tyler Ward
10/1/2014 at 1:04 am:
Maybe lol
Facebook Message from Brooklyn
Page Napier 10/1/2014 at 1:05 am:
Send me a pic!
Facebook Message from Tyler Ward
10/1/2014 at 1:06 am:
What?!! Have you been
drinking?
Facebook Message from Brooklyn
Page Napier 10/1/2014 at 1:07 am:
Maybe
Facebook Message from Brooklyn
Page Napier 10/1/2014 at 1:10 am:
So?
Facebook Message from Tyler Ward
10/1/2014 at 1:11 am:
Send me one first.
Facebook Message from Brooklyn
Page Napier 10/1/2014 at 1:13 am:
Ok I'll send it to your cell phone
so you can delete it. I don't trust Facebook.
Facebook Message from Tyler Ward
10/1/2014 at 1:14 am:
K
Facebook Message from Tyler Ward
10/1/2014 at 1:18 am:
OMG those are nice!
Facebook Message from Brooklyn
Page Napier 10/1/2014 at 1:19 am:
Are you masturbating?
Facebook Message from Tyler Ward
10/1/2014 at 1:20 am:
: )
Facebook Message from Brooklyn
Page Napier 10/1/2014 at 1:21 am:
I want to see!
Facebook Message from Tyler Ward 10/1/2014 at
1:22 am:
I don't know ... I've never done
that.
Facebook Message from Brooklyn Page Napier
10/1/2014 at 1:23 am:
We had a deal : )
Facebook Message from Tyler Ward 10/1/2014 at
1:28 am:
Okay, check your phone
Facebook Message from Brooklyn Page Napier
10/1/2014 at 1:32 am:
OMG, I want that inside me so bad
right now!
Facebook Message from Brooklyn Page Napier
10/1/2014 at 1:40 am:
Hello? You there?
Facebook Message from Tyler Ward 10/2/2014 at
9:04 am:
You deleted my pic
right?
Facebook Message from Brooklyn Page Napier
10/2/2014 at 9:06 am:
What happened to you last
night?
Facebook Message from Tyler Ward 10/2/2014 at
9:08 am:
I fell asleep. You deleted the pic
I sent you right?