Brides of Idaho (55 page)

Someone had put a pot of water to heat over the fire outside. Men traipsed in and out, collecting their things. Some washed up. Others simply left, most of them murmuring words of sympathy to Joanna. Everyone knew her business was in shambles.

Mr. and Mrs. Avery retired to their bedroom and emerged after the others left. “I’m sorry,” Mr. Avery said. “This was an ideal situation for us. But now… Well, now it’s badly damaged. I’m afraid we’ll have to withdraw my offer.”

“I understand,” Joanna said.

Rudy again moved to her side. When she turned toward him, he pulled her to his chest and held her close. “You’ve still got the building. It only needs a few repairs.”

“The smoke damage is everywhere. Everything will have to be scrubbed. Every wall, the ceiling, the bedding.” Her voice grew weaker with each word, and she leaned into him as if he was all that held her up.

He kind of liked the feeling.

Cora came out of the house where she’d gone to inspect the damage. “It’s a mess.” She sat on the edge of the veranda. “I hate fires.”

Joanna broke from Rudy’s grasp and ran to Cora. She sat at her side and wrapped her arms around the girl. “It must bring back awful memories.”

Cora closed her eyes and clung to Joanna. Then she sighed deeply. “I’m going to see if there’s anything left for our breakfast.”

Rudy joined Joanna on the veranda.

“Cora’s parents died in a fire, and that’s how she got the scar on her face.”

“I didn’t know. And yet she stayed and helped. A brave girl.”

They sat in exhausted silence.

“I wonder how the fire started,” she said.

“It started here.” He led the way to the corner and kicked at the slush. A circle of black metal came free. He squatted down and examined it. “I’d say this used to be an ash pail.”

“I don’t understand. I am always so careful with hot ashes.”

He’d noticed Freddy whittling off curls of wood last night. Thought the boy was making some kindling. But why had he sat here? Why was the ash pail here? The explanation that sprang to mind made him shudder. No. Freddy wouldn’t do such a thing.

But he couldn’t meet Joanna’s eyes. He straightened and moved toward the door. He’d ask Freddy before he allowed himself any more suspicions.

He scanned the circle of men around the fire. Freddy wasn’t with them. He walked around the yard, checked both the woodshed and the storage shed in case the boy had taken shelter there. But there was no sign of the boy. Nothing.

Finally he returned to the house, where Joanna and Cora were dumping the buckets of water on the floor and mucking out the gray mess. “Have either of you seen Freddy?”

They spun around to face him. Both looked startled, but he focused on Joanna.

“I haven’t seen him,” she said.

“Me either,” Cora echoed.

Joanna set aside the filthy broom and came to Rudy’s side. “Isn’t he outside?”

“I’ve looked. I can’t find him anywhere.”

“He’d be frightened by the fire. Likely he’s hiding.”

Rudy sighed and scrubbed at his neck. “Maybe for good reason.”

“What are you saying?”

He explained his suspicions. “It’s Freddy’s job to empty the ashes. He’s been taught how to handle them. Knows better than to leave a bucket of hot ashes against a wooden wall.”

“Are you saying he did this deliberately?”

“I hope I’m wrong.” He wouldn’t know for certain until he talked to Freddy, but he knew. He simply knew Freddy was responsible. He wished he didn’t. How could he ever make it up to Joanna for ruining her plans? She’d likely never speak to either Freddy or him again.

“But why? Why would he do this to me?”

Rudy understood the why. Just not the method. “He didn’t want you to leave.”

Joanna retreated to the table and sat on a chair, not seeming to notice it was wet and dirty. “Why didn’t he say something?”

Rudy shrugged. “Probably didn’t see how it would make a difference.” Any more than he did. But now—a traitorous thought filled his mind—perhaps he would have time to show her how they could all stay and work together. He hated that he hoped to benefit from her disaster.

“I don’t understand.” Joanna slapped her palms on her thighs. “But it doesn’t matter now. We need to find him.”

“And when we do?” He wondered what she had in mind.

Her eyes narrowed. “If you recall our first meeting…”

He grinned. “Yup. I sure do. You were all upset and fiery because he’d stolen a pie.”

“And if you recall, I said the culprit should pay the price. I still believe that. When we find him, he is going to have to come back here and help clean up the mess and repair the damage.”

He nodded, hoping he looked appropriately stern. But he failed to see how Freddy would construe the work as a punishment and not a reward. “Freddy and I will see that it’s cleaned up and repaired.” He kept his anticipation to himself.

“I’m going to look around,” Joanna said.

He followed her outside and waited as she entered each building.

Finally she accepted the obvious and stood in the middle of the yard. “He’s not here.”

“I know.”

“Where would he go?”

“Your guess is as good as mine. I’m going to look for him.”

“I’m coming with you.”

He’d hoped she would.

They searched through town, stopping often to provide details on the fire. Without exception, people voiced their sympathy and offered to help any way they could. She thanked them then asked if they’d seen Freddy. No one had.

They hurried on. They walked as far as Levi and Glory’s mission and explained what had happened.

“I’ll check all the buildings and see if he’s hiding here,” Levi offered. Glory insisted they have breakfast.

“I’ll go help Cora as soon as I’m done here,” she said.

Rudy began to wonder if he’d get a chance to do any work at all or if all the kind family and neighbors would do it for him.

Levi came back from searching the buildings and grounds. “No sign of Freddy. I’ll help you look for him.”

They returned to Bonners Ferry and decided to split up, Levi searching up the hill overlooking the ferry while Rudy and Joanna went to the trail that led away from town into the woods. An hour later, they returned to the stopping house, but Cora still hadn’t seen him. They headed up the trail toward Trace and Mandy’s, stopping often to listen for any sign of Freddy. The woods were strangely silent.

At the log cabin they relayed news of the fire and Freddy’s disappearance. “We’ll go down and help clean up,” Trace said. “Unless you want us to help you find Freddy?”

Rudy considered their offer. “I don’t think he could have gone far.” Though with every passing moment he could get farther and farther away. Unless he found a place to hide. Suddenly Rudy remembered a perfect hiding place with a beautiful view. “I think I know where he might be. You go down and help Cora while we find him.”

Trace and Mandy began to gather together cleaning supplies while Rudy and Joanna returned to the trail. “Let’s look where we had the picnic.”

She nodded. “Why didn’t I think of that?”

For a bit they walked side by side. He took her hand, wanting to offer comfort and support and so much more. She squeezed his hand and smiled at him. The trail narrowed, and she let him lead the way.

They arrived at the spot. Memories of the fun they’d had momentarily eased his worry. He wondered if she felt the same way as she again squeezed his hand.

“Freddy,” they called in unison.

Nothing but the flutter of bird wings.

“Maybe he’s hiding,” Joanna said.

Rudy squatted down to examine the ground. Joanna placed her hand on his shoulder, and he almost forgot about Freddy. He’d felt close to Joanna in this spot. He’d considered whether it was safe to believe in love. He still wondered, but now was not the time. He shifted to study the rest of the clearing. “I don’t see any sign of him being here, but I might have missed it.”

They searched the woods, knowing Freddy might refuse to answer their calls. An hour later, they returned to the clearing without him.

“I can’t believe he isn’t here,” he said. “I don’t mind saying I’m getting a little worried.”

“Me, too. After all, despite his big, brave talk, he is only ten years old.”

“Could he have fallen?”

“Broke a leg maybe. Or someone kidnapped him.”

Rudy laughed at the idea. “They’d soon be bringing him back.”

Joanna chuckled. “I suppose they would. But don’t worry, we’ll find him.”

He allowed himself to drink hope from her gaze. “We better go down to the stopping house. Maybe Levi has him.”

Hand in hand, as if it were the most natural thing in the world—and Rudy admitted it sort of felt that way—they hurried back to town, pausing often to call Freddy’s name and searching any likely bushes and trees along the path.

They burst into the stopping house, where half a dozen people used mops and rags to sop up the mess of the fire. A tarp had been tacked over the burned wall. Maybe they’d leave the rebuilding for him.

Levi was there. “I didn’t find him. Thought you would have.”

“Not a sign.”

“We need to enlist a bit more help.” Levi turned to the cleaning crew. “Glory, Mandy, could you come here?”

“If anyone can find him, these two can.” Levi outlined a search grid. “First, we’ll pray for success.” Levi prayed aloud.

For the first time that Rudy could remember, he wanted to believe God could help him and would choose to do so. Maybe not for his sake or even Freddy’s, but because of Levi’s steadfast faith.

This time four more headed out to search for his missing nephew—Joanna’s sisters and their husbands. But Joanna and Rudy stayed together. They were to search toward the ferry and ask the ferryman if he’d seen anything. He scoured the area for any sign of a boy but saw none. However, it was impossible to say if he’d been on the trail. The men leaving the stopping house had scuffed the path.

The ferryman said he knew Freddy. “He often comes to watch me load and unload. But nope, can’t say I’ve seen anything of him since yesterday.”

Rudy could no longer deny the burn of worry in the pit of his stomach. He rubbed his neck. “Where could he be?”

Joanna squeezed his arm. “He’s got to be somewhere.”

“But where?”

“Rudy, God sees. God will help us find him.”

“I can’t believe He cares about me enough to help me find Freddy.”

Joanna pulled him around to look squarely into his eyes. “He loves you as much as He loves me or Levi or anyone else in the world.”

He ached to believe it. “How do you know?”

“You told me you read the verse that says He loves you with an everlasting love.”

“But I wasn’t born when that was written. How can it mean me?”

“Doesn’t everlasting mean from beginning of time to the end of time?”

“Maybe.”

“Seems that would have to include the day you were born.”

“I want to think so, but…” How could he voice all his fears and hurts and disappointments without sounding like a whiner?

“We mustn’t make the mistake of equating God’s love with that of people who failed to love us as they should.”

“That makes sense.”

Still he found it difficult to believe. But four hours later when they again assembled in the stopping house, he realized he had nothing to lose but Freddy. He sat on a still-damp chair and stared at the plate of food Cora set before him. She placed one before Joanna as well. Joanna’s sisters and husbands had returned and eaten earlier and stood by, obviously wishing they could offer some sort of help.

Rudy guessed they’d all run out of ideas. He forked the food to his mouth more out of need to have something to do than out of hunger. But he quickly forgot the food and put his fork down.

“How can he simply have disappeared?” He saw a guarded look between Levi and Trace.

“You think he’s met with harm, don’t you?”

Levi rocked his head back and forth. “We’ve searched high and low. There isn’t a rock within miles that hasn’t been turned over in an effort to find him.”

Rudy’s shoulders slumped. “There’s a lot of trees and mountains surrounding this place.” Was Freddy lost out there? Fallen into the river? Or fallen off a cliff?

Joanna pressed her hand to his. “We’ll find him. We must.”

But one look in her face and he saw the same desperation and fear that gripped his insides until every breath pained him.

“Where is he?” He was past caring if everyone thought he was weak. “I can’t give up on him. I can’t lose him.” He held Joanna’s hand in a deadly vise. It was the only thing that anchored him to hope.

She answered his desperate plea with a reassuring look. “We haven’t looked across the river.”

“The ferryman said he hadn’t been on the ferry.”

Joanna’s smile barely lifted the corners of her mouth. “We’re talking about Freddy. You don’t think it’s possible he sneaked on without being noticed?”

He was willing to believe anything at this point. “He could if he put his mind to it.” He pushed back from the table and pulled Joanna to her feet. “We’re going to look for him over there.” Darkness would soon be upon them. They must find him soon.

The others stood, too, their words of reassurance overlapping. “We’ll be praying.” “We’ll continue to look around here.” “Let us know if you need help.”

“We’ll ride.” He decided. Before he finished, Glory headed for the door.

“I’ll saddle your horses,” she said.

Cora tossed bread and cheese into a sack. “He’ll be hungry.”

He could have hugged her for believing he would find Freddy.

A few minutes later they were on the ferry with the horses. He and Joanna stood side by side watching the water slip by.

“What happens if I don’t find him?” The thought crawled into his brain and refused to budge.

Joanna took his arm and tugged him around to face her. Her eyes were steady and demanded his full attention. “We’ll find him. We must.”

“You’ve said that over and over, and yet we still haven’t. What happens if we don’t?” He had to know how he was supposed to manage if the hours turned into days and they never found Freddy.

“If—and I’m only saying this for sake of answering your question—if we don’t find him, I will be here to help you through each day.”