Bundle of Joy (25 page)

"You're pregnant," he reasoned, not a man to recognize danger when he saw it. "How are you supposed to look?"

She sighed in exasperation. "Don't you know you're supposed to tell me I'm slim and gorgeous, Charles?"

He reached over and rubbed her enormous belly. Leave it to a man to highlight the obvious. "What's the matter? Bad night?"

"The worst." She eased herself down onto one of the kitchen chairs, aware of every ounce of her bulk. Drawing a deep breath was a distant memory. "I just wish this whole thing was over and done with." She regretted the words as soon as they took shape. "I mean, I'm so tired of being pregnant."

Unfortunately those words were no better than the first group she'd uttered. Charlie's smile faded and a dark expression clouded his vivid green eyes.

She rose from the chair with difficulty and walked over to where he stood by the stove. "I didn't mean it like that."

"Yeah? How did you mean it?"

"Look at me, Charlie," she said, gesturing toward her immense belly. "I'm enormous. This is like having a bean bag chair strapped to your waist."

"Now you're going to tell me you can't see your feet."

"Feet?" She laughed despite her black mood. "I'm not sure I have feet anymore."

"It won't be much longer," he said, reaching out an
d drawing her to him. "Less than two months and you'll be back to your old self."

"I don't think I'll ever be my old self." It was hard to even remember who her old self was.

"You know, I kind of like you this way."

She arched a brow. "Barefoot and pregnant? Oh really, Charles...."

He shushed her with a quick kiss. "Friendly."

"I'm always friendly," she said. "Being friendly is what I do best."

"Not with me it isn't. You always acted like you couldn't stand the sight of me."

She didn't deny it. "You always acted as if you couldn't get far enough away from me. Every
time I came into the bar, you disappeared into the back and never so much as poked your head out."

"Why bother?" he countered. "You would've chopped my head off if I dared to say hello to you."

She sighed. "I was that big a snob?"

"Worse," he said. "Even after that night in your store, you still acted as if we'd never done more than nod to each other."

She rested her head against his shoulder, thankful for his warmth and solid male presence. "You must admit the circumstances were anything but ordinary. I could just imagine what you thought of me."

"That you were easy?"

"Exactly."

"I know more about you than you realize, Caroline."

Her heartbeat accelerated. "What does that mean?" Had she left a photo album about or a letter from one of her brothers or sisters? Worse yet, had Sam spilled the beans about Caroline's less-than-elegant childhood?

Charlie sensed the fear in her instantly and hurried to put her at ease.
"You're a flirt," he said, "but I know that's as far as it goes."

She relaxed against him, her skittering heartbeat returning to normal. "Flirtation is a lost art," she said airily. "More women should practice their feminine wiles."

He recognized a closed subject when he saw one and he let Caroline pull herself together. He might know more about her than she realized, but he was smart enough to know he hadn't begun to scratch the surface. There was a deep sadness inside the woman he called his wife, a core of loneliness so fundamental to her personality that there were times when he wished he could kiss away that uncertainty he saw lurking beneath her bright and breezy facade.

But of course she'd never admit to such a thing. Not Caroline. She was the darling of O'Rourke's, the belle of Princeton shopkeepers, the most glamorous pregnant lady in all of central New Jersey. The fact that every now and then a scared little girl peered out from her big blue eyes wasn't something she would acknowledge, much less talk about.

There weren't many things in his life that Charlie regretted but that morning he regretted that his marriage would be over before he really got to know his wife.

#

Something changed between Caroline and Charlie that day. Another barrier between them had fallen, bringing them closer than either had ever imagined possible.

Neither one said anything about the change, but by mutual consent they spent all of their free time together. Things she had always done alone, like grocery shopping and picking up the dry cleaning, became almost fun with Charlie along. Funny how she had once been so happy with her tightly controlled world. Her serene apartment. Her meals-for-one. The absolute certainty that she would never marry or even want to.

This isn't forever,
a voice warned her as they went off to the supermarket one evening.
Don't go getting used to keeping his favorite foods in the house.
Once the baby was born it would be back to her old life, her old ways. After all, it was what she wanted, wasn't it?

Charlie made grocery shopping an epic performance. Caroline didn't often go to the supermarket but when she did she was a methodical shopper, not given to impulse buying. She bought exactly what she wanted, price be damned, and got in and out of the store in record time.

Not Charlie.

Charlie was the perfect consumer. Shiny displays of candy bars drew him like a magnet.

"Oh, Charles," she groaned as he put a jar of Marshmallow Fluff in the shopping cart. "I haven't seen that glop since I was a little girl."

He grinned at her. "I'm surprised. I didn't figure you'd
ever seen Marshmallow Fluff."

Careful, Caroline,
she warned herself.
Dangerous territory.
She reached for a jar of hot chutney, one with a terribly British label.

"Chutney?" he asked. "Who the hell eats chutney?"

"Heathen," she said, putting the jar in her basket. "All enlightened diners enjoy chutney."

He cast a dubious glance at an entire row of various chutneys. "What is it?"

Caroline moved down the aisle. "You eat it with curry."

"I didn't ask what you eat it with. I asked what it's made of."

"Oh, this and that."

"You don't know." It was a statement, not a question.

"Of course I know." She didn't really. The only thing she was certain of where chutney was concerned was that it carried a certain upper-crust cachet.

He darted around to the front of the cart and stopped her in her tracks. "So tell me."

She giggled at the sight of her handsome, muscular husband playing traffic cop in the condiments aisle. "It's late, Charlie. We have shopping to do."

"I want to know what's in chutney."

Her gaze slid casually to the jar resting on its side in the basket of her cart. Most of the label was hidden but she was able to make out a word or two. "Sugar," she offered. "A little sugar."

He grabbed the jar and held it behind his back. "Okay. Now tell me what else is in the stuff."

"Snakes and snails and puppy dog tails. I have no idea. Are you satisfied now?"

"You eat it but you don't know what it is."

"You eat frankfurters from Dynamite Dogs and I'll bet you don't know what's in them."

His green eyes were twinkling with mischief and she felt the day's fatigue drop away from her. "Let's make a pact," he said, extending his right hand. "I don't introduce the kid to Dynamite Dogs and you don't introduce him to chutney."

"Chutney is wonderful."

"So are Dynamite Dogs."

"You drive a hard bargain, Charles." She extended her own hand. "No chutney."

He nodded. "No Dynamite Dogs."

They shook on it.

Charlie grabbed the cart from her and pushed it to the checkout line. Caroline walked behind him, enjoying the way his muscles bunched then relaxed as he maneuvered the cart through the crowd.
This is marriage, too,
she thought, glancing at the other couples stocking up for the weekend. Everyday things like shopping for food and doing laundry and even debating about chutney and Marshmallow Fluff. Sexual chemistry was wonderful, it was true, but it seemed to Caroline that it was the more mundane facts of life that provided the true foundation for a marriage.

"Any coupons?" asked the cashier.

Caroline shook her head. "Afraid not."

The cashier frowned. "Better start clipping 'em, honey. Once the baby comes you'll be glad you learned how to pinch a penny."

Charlie looked at Caroline and winked. "We'll start tomorrow," he told the cashier.

Caroline smiled and looked down at her jar of chutney nestled companionably next to Charlie's Marshmallow Fluff and for a few wonderful minutes she was able to pretend they were just another married couple out grocery shopping on a Friday night--and that there were an endless number of Friday nights stretching out into their future.

#

The days
before Christmas passed swiftly.

Caroline put in less time at
Twice Over Lightly
and Charlie put in more time at home. They faithfully attended Lamaze classes and Charlie proved to be a demanding but compassionate coach. Caroline felt closer to Charlie than she had ever felt to anyone in her life but there were still barriers between them, barriers that could never be toppled.

So much of who and what she was could never be shared with him without exposing her deepest insecurities.
Carly Bradley was never far from the surface and there were times when Caroline almost felt that Charlie could see the girl beneath the woman. She tried to pull back, to be less willing to lean on him as her pregnancy advanced, but there was something so wonderful about his strong male presence that her attempts to distance herself failed miserably.

She told herself it wasn't weakness on her part, the way she turned to Charlie so often and in so many ways. She needed someone to lean on for her sense of physical well-being was shaky at best.

Going to work in the morning had become a feat of monumental proportions and she was thrilled when a Christmas Eve blizzard blew across central New Jersey and snowed them in.

"Forget it," said Charlie, looking out the window at the foot of snow blanketing the landscape. "Nobody's going anywhere today."

Caroline breathed a sigh of relief. "Wonderful," she said, settling back amidst the sofa cushions. "I'm going to sit here all day and do nothing but read magazines and drink hot chocolate." She reached for her cup and winced. "Ouch! I must have pulled a muscle."

He turned away from the window and saw her m
assaging the base of her spine. "Your back?"

"Yes. No--well, actually I'm not sure." She frowned and arched her back as far as her swollen belly would allow. "I feel a tingling sensation. Almost
like a tug."

A thousand different thoughts, none of them pleasant, occurred to Charlie as he tried to stay calm. "You don't think you're in labor, do you?"

That, at least, brought a smile to her face. "Good heavens, no. We have another month to go."

"Yeah, well, babies don't always come with timetables." He hadn't forgotten that list of possible disasters he'd first read about in the doctor's office months ago.

"I just slept funny," she said, taking a sip of cocoa. "That's all it is."

Charlie nodded but he wasn't convinced. She didn't look like herself. There were circles under her eyes and her complexion was paler than he'd ever seen it. She'd been restless these past few nights and twice he'd heard her moaning in her sleep.

"Don't look at me that way, Donohue. You're making me nervous."

"I'm concerned," he said, trying to downplay his anxiety. "Maybe we should call Burkheit."

"For what?" she asked. "Because I have a backache? Don't be silly. I'm sure I'll be fine in a few hours."

He nodded. No point in continuing the conversation. If he told her how he was really feeling, he'd scare the daylights out of her and that wouldn't be good for either his wife or their baby.

So he went into the kitchen, picked up the telephone, and called the doctor himself.

"I'm concerned but not alarmed," said Dr. Burkheit. "Has her water broken?"

"Not that I know of."

Burkheit laughed heartily. "Trust me, Charlie. You'd know about it." He grew more serious. "Any bleeding?"

"No."
Thank God.

"This could be the real thing or it could be a dress rehearsal. We might even have miscalculated her due date." He went on to explain that Caroline might have conceived a month earlier than they'd believed; Charlie didn't bother to tell him that was impossible. "Call me in another two hours--sooner, if she starts bleeding."

Charlie hung up the telephone, only to find Caroline standing in the doorway.

"Who were you on the phone with?" she asked, in the tone of voice that he knew meant trouble.