Burdened (A Burdened Novel) (52 page)

“I’m not scared.” I
put my head back down.
You play dirty
.

You started it
.

You better
st—
I gasp out loud—sounding like a moan—from the feeling of a hand grabbing between my legs.

Taylor and Justin turn around to look at me
, and Nathan starts laughing. “Sorry,” I respond to their scowls, and they turn back around. I pinch his side.

Tracey
, that shit hurt
. He’s still laughing.

Don’t do that again
. It felt way too good for it to not be his hands, and for us to be down here with everybody.

He pulls me up
to his face.
I’m sorry, baby. I couldn’t help myself
.

I raise an eyebrow.
That was not cool
.

He lifts my chin
. His smirk is gone, eyes low—seductive.
I’m sorry
.

He turns us
into the couch and he kisses me softly, then pulls back without making a sound. I lick my bottom lip, not ready for his taste to leave me. I lean forward to kiss him again and he lets me, taking control of the kiss so that it’s soundless.

He kisses me like he loves me, and I dissolve
like pearls in vinegar. This kiss holds nothing but tangible love—the feeling of affection in a kiss. I place my hand against his, which is against my cheek, enjoying being kissed.

I love you
, Tracey—through anything, for anything. You are mine, and nothing is going to change that or take you from me. I’ll lay down my life—and others’ lives—for you, give you all that life holds and still remain deeply indebted to you. That’s how strong my love is. Never doubt my love for you
.

He speaks in that hypnotizing language
—that I now understand—and I fall in love with him all over again.

He kisses me twice and pulls back.
Nathan is coming. He has a girl with him
. We readjust to our original position. I, still feeling his kiss, rub over my bottom lip. Something in that kiss I’ve never felt before—a feeling I cannot place, but the closest I can come is ‘contented.’

“Hey, what are you guys watching?” Li
ttle Nathan descends the stairs. The movie is almost over.

Everyone immediately recognizes he’s with a girl and we all straighten up. Taylor and Justin readjust to their original position
, and Nathan sits up with his feet on the floor, slouched against the couch. I lay against him, instead of on him. Glen and Scott sit up straight as well.

“Hey
, Nathan,” everyone, except Glen, greets. She is caught off-guard.

Little Nathan goes into introductions
, introducing the girl he’s with as Cindy. We all say ‘hi’ and they take the other end of the couch that Nathan and I are on.

Cindy is cute
, and the same height as Little Nathan, with short hair. She seems shy, but calms down when she is no longer the center of attention.

The movie
ends and everyone disburses for a bathroom break or to stretch, then comes back to watch the next movie. It’s like family movie night, because we are joined by the cousins. I ask Nathan where Roseland and his wife are, and he tells me they took the kids and Nicholas out of state to some waterpark for a week.

Everyone
in the basement is okay, not overbearing, and I’m still comfortable. They are all relaxed and enjoying the moment.

This is how it is sometimes. We all just gather around and chill
, or decide to go somewhere as a family. It usually starts off as a small group and then, somehow, everyone just comes together
.

So this is what I’ll be getting
? Nice, calm Newcombs
.

Pretty much
, except for around the summer. It can get pretty crazy. But yeah, this is it for the most part
.

I can do
this
.

Everyone stays quiet while watching the movie, except when someone in the movie does something stupid. Seems like everyone is aware of Glen and Cindy
’s obliviousness to everything, and no one talks about anything but the movie.

The psycho
-intruders movie ends and Little Nathan runs upstairs to grab a few more, telling Cindy he will be back.

“So all of you are Nathan’s family?” Cindy asks
, attracting all the looks to her. She shies away.

“Yes
, all, except for me and Tracey. I—” Glen starts, but is cut short.

“Tracey
is
a part of our family.” Little Nathan comes back down the stairs, cutting her off. “You’re the new face.” He looks at Cindy. “Tracey is my sister. She’s sitting with my brother.” He points to us. “She—” He points to Glen. “—must be with my cousin, Scott. I’m not sure what’s going on with that. I’ve never seen her before.”

I sit up
. He doesn’t know Glen is Scott’s mate. “Glen is with Scott, Nathan. She’s his.” My words are stuck. What do I say?

His mate too
? I hear Little Nathan’s voice inside my head filling in the blanks. I nod to him slowly, and his eyes widen in astonishment, realizing I heard him in my head.

Nathan sits up behind me. “Did that just happen?”
He asks calmly, noticing the same thing.

Little Nathan looks
at his brother, then back at me. “So you did it.” He asks referring to me accepting them as family.

“Okay
, what am I missing?” Taylor turns around and looks at me and Nathan.
Is what he’s saying true
? I smile at her crookedly, with a scrunched nose, and nod confirming I hear her too. She squeals and hugs me.

“Not cool
, guys,” Scott voices, sitting next to a confused Glen.

“Your fault
, Scott,” Nathan returns.

“What’s your fault
, Scott?” Glen asks him.

Sco
tt shakes his head, then looks at Little Nathan. “She is to me what Tracey is to Nathan, which makes her family as well.” Oh, yeah. That’s where I was going with that. It sounds better coming from him anyway. “Now, can you put in the movie?”

Little Nathan gives Scott a look that asks a question. Scott shrugs and turns back to confused Glen. He kisses her and
her confused expression turns happy. He is going to give that girl a bad case of brain damage.

Tracey, you accepted my family
.

I look
at Nathan.
I did, huh
?

How could you get any better
? He lays his head back on the couch. Now he is sitting with his feet next to Taylor, who has one arm wrapped around one of his legs and the other wrapped around Justin’s back.

I l
ay my head against his chest.
Probably by living with you
.

Yea
h, but one step at a time
.

Yea
h, I’m going to lay here and doze off for a minute. If you leave, take me with you
.

He adjusts
himself so I’m more comfortable, without disturbing Taylor. I close my eyes and see nothing but darkness, and black liquid leaking from tortured, broken walls with clown faces on them. My eyes shoot open.

Umm
, can you clear my head
?

You’re scared of clowns?
But demon-tainted Sephlem are no problem
?

Don’t start
, Nathan. You already have something coming for you
.

You’re right
, baby, and because I’m so afraid of you, I’m going to clear your head
. It’s full of sarcasm.

You
better
be afraid of me. I’ll toss you like I did this morning
.

He laughs out loud
. Everyone looks at him. “Sorry,” he says, still looking at me.
Lay down, Tracey

I get comfortable
, pulling the blanket over my head, and doze off.

Waking up, I’m turned into Nathan and facing the couch. His breaths are deep, which tells me he’s asleep. I sit up slightly, trying not to wake him. Looking around, everyone is pretty much asleep, while another movie on the TV demands someone to press ‘play.’

There are no windows
, so I can’t determine what time of the day it is. It feels ‘late-early,’ maybe seven or eight.

“What’s wrong
, Tracey?” I look towards the voice and Cindy is laying on Little Nathan, looking at me.

“Nothing.” My hands heat
—not a good sign for Cindy.

“You should
lay back down then—if you’re fine and all.” The film covers my eyes, and her image changes like Nathan’s did. She looks like a…jackal. Like the monster without the cage around her head, every other tooth is sharp and her gums are blood red. She has light grey skin with scars and cuts on her face and arms, and her nails are long and a darker shade of grey. I blink and she is back to regular. “You sure you’re okay?”

“Yea
h, I’m fine.” I blink again and the jackal leaps forward, to attack me.

Shit! I flip backwards over the edge of the couch
, trying to get away from her—making a lot of noise apparently, because everyone jumps up. I look back at Cindy. She is still lying across Little Nathan, staring at me like I had lost it.

She scared the shit out of me. It had to be her.

Nathan is up and next to me. “You okay? What happened?”

“Yea
h. Can we go?” I’m feeling weird being down here with her, and her attacking me but
not
attacking me.

“Yes
…” he says slowly, looking at me as if he’s looking
through
me. He must be in my head. I don’t mind—not right now anyway. I need him to see what I saw.

“Hey Tracey, you okay?” Glen says from behind me.

I turn to her and nod, hearing Nathan tell everyone we will be back later.

That girl scared the shit out of me. She looked just like a
jackal—a real one: grey skin, black hair, sharp nails, scratched face—and she tried to attack me.

“Let me know if
you all need anything,” Taylor says to us.

“We will.” Nathan grabs the blanket and we leave the basement. He stops me at the top of the stairs
, gently grabbing my face. I place my back against the door.

“Are you okay?”

“What was that?”

“Just what you
thought.”

“They actually exist?”

“Yes. Just in a different since then you are familiar with.” He grabs my hand. “You want to go somewhere? We’ll talk about it.”

“Yes
. I need some fresh air. Did you see her tr—”

“
Shh, wait.”

We leave the house in his truck and he drives for about ten minutes before
backing up in front of the water.

“Come on.” He helps me from the truck from his side.

We walk around to the back of the truck and he lets down the hatch, lays the blanket down, and pulls out a duffle bag from a compartment in the back.

He helps me up in
to the back of the truck, lays his head on the duffle bag, and I lay on him. The sky is clear, and it’s quiet—even the water is quiet. The wind is calm, providing a soft breeze to the comfortably warm air. The moon is full, and I watch the stars circling it, which always reminds me of Nathan’s eyes.

I close my eyes and see Cindy. “Did you see her attack me
? Why did it seem so real for me? All I did was blink and she was sitting in the same spot, like she had never moved.”

“That’s
how they work. It may have been her intention to attack you, and it seems that your gift showed her actions to you before she acted on them.”

“But why would she want to attack me?”

“That is what I have to figure out.” He goes quiet for a while. “To be honest with you, Tracey, what I had said about ‘if my father tries to kill you,’ wasn’t only meant for him. That goes for anyone, so Cindy might not be around for much longer.”

“Nathan
—”

“I’m just being honest. Jackals have no limitation. They don’t care
about anything. I don’t know why she wants to hurt you, but since you saw her intent, I’m not going to ignore it.”

“Why do you think I saw her
actual self?”

“I think that
ability lies within your black eyes—something like the way you were able to see me earlier.”

“Have you ever had to go against a
jackal before?”

“A long time ago
. I barely remember it. But I do know that, for whatever the reason, I didn’t waste any time getting rid of it. They aren’t like the movies or the animal. They, like hybrid Sephlems, can portray themselves as human if they want. What you saw is how they look in their true form.” He rubs his chin “They live to cause pain and kill.”