Business Without the Bullsh*t: 49 Secrets and Shortcuts You Need to Know (23 page)

BOOK: Business Without the Bullsh*t: 49 Secrets and Shortcuts You Need to Know
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SECRET
30
How to Have a Real Conversation

Here’s a simple four-step process for making certain that every business conversation serves your purpose, whether you’re face-to-face, on the phone, or trading e-mails or texts. In the latter two cases you have a bit more time to think, but that’s the only difference.

1. KNOW WHY YOU’RE HAVING THE CONVERSATION.

There are times at work when you’ll just be enjoying the company of other people. While you need to be careful not to spread gossip or blurt something stupid, when you’re “shooting the bull” (as they say), you can relax and have fun.

However, if you need to talk about something important, it’s best not to jump into the conversation without having an explicit goal in mind. Having a goal keeps the conversation focused, preventing you from wasting time and energy.

Similarly, if somebody starts a conversation with you, it’s often useful to wonder why the conversation is happening and why now. It’s not worth obsessing about, but if you’ve got a sense of the “why” it’s easier to get “where” the conversation needs to go.

2. IGNORE YOUR “MONKEY MIND.”

The ancient Chinese believed everyone has a “monkey mind” that jumps from thought to thought, like so:

What is she thinking about me?

Will I make a sale?

What if I can’t pay the mortgage?

Gosh, that wallpaper is ugly.

I’ve got to get to the airport in two hours.

Etc., etc., etc.

This constant mental noise pulls your attention away from whomever you’re conversing with and toward your own perspectives, priorities, and goals.

If you listen to your “monkey mind,” you’ll hear only a percentage of what the other person is saying. In all likelihood you’ll misunderstand and/or forget what was said.

You practice ignoring your monkey mind by sitting quietly by yourself and listening to it chatter away. By becoming more aware of it, you can more easily identify it and differentiate it from the focused thoughts that are relevant to a conversation.

3. ACKNOWLEDGE, RECAP, AND RESPOND.

When the other person has finished speaking, do not just leap into what you want to say next. Make some acknowledgment—even if just a nod of the head or a short “Ah!”—that you’ve heard the other person, rather than the chattering of your “monkey mind.”

If the other person has said something complex or emotional, or has introduced significant new information, briefly recount and characterize what he or she said.

Recapping what you’ve heard gives the other person an opportunity
to correct any misperception or to elaborate as necessary to ensure you “get it.” It also prevents the conversation from going awry based on a correctible misunderstanding.

Regardless of whether you’ve recapped, pause for a moment to consider what you heard, and then respond with a statement, story, or question that adds to the conversation and moves it closer to its point and purpose.

For example, if a potential customer shares the details of a business problem, you might then tell a brief story—once you’ve restated the problem and are sure you understand it—about how another company handled a similar problem.

While the above method seems a bit artificial when first practiced, with time it becomes second nature.

SHORTCUT

MEANINGFUL CONVERSATIONS

KNOW
the reason you’re having a conversation.

IGNORE
your “monkey mind.”

CONSIDER
what was said, rephrase if necessary, respond appropriately.

SECRET
31
How to Write a Compelling E-mail

This is a foolproof six-step method for writing an e-mail that helps convince the reader to take the action you’d prefer:

1. KNOW THE DECISION YOU WANT MADE.

E-mails are the most common form of communication in the business world. Unfortunately many are so poorly written that recipients must struggle to figure out why they are reading the e-mail and what they are supposed to do about it.

Therefore, as with any business communication, when writing an e-mail you must start by understanding exactly what decision you want made. Until you’re clear on this essential point, don’t send the e-mail. It’ll just be a waste of time, both yours and the recipient’s.

2. WRITE THE CONCLUSION FIRST.

Your conclusion is a simple statement of the decision you want the recipient to make, based on the contents of your e-mail.

In school they probably taught you to start with an introduction and end with a conclusion. Bad advice.

Nobody in the business world has time to wander through the
development of an idea. If you don’t tell people the reason for the e-mail immediately, chances are they’ll just move on.

So start with your conclusion. For example, suppose your goal is to get your boss to approve an in-house gym.

WRONG:

Jim,

As you know, employee absenteeism is generally recognized as an ongoing problem with a steep financial impact, both in our company and in other companies in our industry. [Yada, yada, yada.] Therefore, we should consider allocating money for the installation of a gym at our headquarter facility.

RIGHT:

Jim,

I want you to approve the installation of an in-house gym.

Note that the “right” way simply gets to the point without all the excess verbiage.

3. STRUCTURE ARGUMENTS INTO DIGESTIBLE CHUNKS.

Once you’ve stated your conclusion (i.e., the decision you want made), collect the arguments that support it. To make your arguments “digestible,” break them into small chunks, presenting each point with a similar format and sentence structure.

WRONG:

According to a recently published government report, group physical fitness is extremely
important even though very few companies actually demonstrate a commitment to it! Many firms identify physical fitness as an undervalued competitive asset, but don’t have a plan for improvement in this area, even though physical fitness is strongly linked to corporate and individual economic and personal success. I feel that if we do not address the issue of physical fitness as it enhances workplace productivity, we will be left behind.

RIGHT:

An in-house gym will:

- Reduce absenteeism

- Increase overall productivity

Once again, the “right” way hits the most important points without wasting time on extraneous issues.

4. BOLSTER EACH ARGUMENT WITH EVIDENCE.

A “statement of fact” is only an opinion unless you can prove that the statement is actually a fact. While your opinion may influence those who trust you, most of the time you’ll want evidence to back it up. The best evidence comes from quoting an authoritative source.

WRONG:

An in-house gym will reduce absenteeism because people will want to come to work rather than stay at home since they’ll have more energy and they won’t get sick so much.

RIGHT:

- Reduce absenteeism. Companies with in-house gyms experience 20 percent less absenteeism than those that lack them, according to the National Health Institute.

The “right” example expands one of the arguments with a verifiable fact. Do the same with any other arguments you make.

5. REPEAT YOUR CONCLUSION AS A CALL TO ACTION.

At the end of the e-mail, restate the conclusion in a way that provides the recipient with the next step he or she must take—assuming you’ve convinced that person to support the decision. Keep it simple and specific.

WRONG:

Your support for this project would be greatly appreciated.

RIGHT:

When you respond to this e-mail with your approval, I’ll get the process started.

6. INSERT A BENEFIT IN THE SUBJECT LINE.

Your subject line (aka the title) is the most important part of your e-mail, because your choice of words determines whether the e-mail gets opened and read. That’s why you write it last, after you’ve written down both your conclusion and the arguments and evidence that support it.

Ideally a subject line should do two things: (1) create enough
interest or curiosity that the recipient opens and reads the e-mail, and (2) imply the conclusion that you want the recipient to accept (i.e., the decision you want made).

In most cases the best way to accomplish both tasks is to encapsulate a benefit (or benefits) that will result from the decision you’d like the recipient to make.

WRONG:

To: [email protected]

Subject: The Health Impact of In-House Employee Fitness Programs

RIGHT:

To: [email protected]

Subject: How we can reduce absenteeism

Note that the “right” example positions the e-mail as something that requires action, while the “wrong” example positions the e-mail as a theoretical discussion.

SHORTCUT

WRITING E-MAILS

KNOW
what decision you want made.

FIRST
express that decision as a conclusion.

SUPPORT
that conclusion with simple arguments.

PROVIDE
evidence to bolster each argument.

REPEAT
your conclusion as an action item.

WRITE
the subject last and include a benefit.

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