Camp Payback

CAMP PAYBACK

J.K. Rock

S
PENCER
H
ILL
C
ONTEMPORARY

Copyright © 2014 by Joanne Rock and Karen Rock

Sale of the paperback edition of this book without its cover is unauthorized.

Spencer Hill Press

This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce this book or portions thereof in any form whatsoever.

Contact: Spencer Hill Contemporary, an imprint of Spencer Hill Press, PO Box 247, Contoocook, NH, 03229, USA

Please visit our website at
www.spencerhillcontemporary.com

First Edition: April 2014

J.K Rock

Camp Payback / by J.K. Rock – 1st ed.

p. cm.

Summary:

Teenage girl is determined to make her last year at summer camp the best ever.

The author acknowledges the copyrighted or trademarked status and trademark owners of the following wordmarks mentioned in this fiction: Airstream, AstroTurf, Bedazzler, Chevy, Coke, Dairy Queen, Dixie, eBay, EpiPen, Ford, Frisbee, Gatorade, Hello Kitty, iPhone, JELL-O, Keds, LEGO, Lord of the Rings, Midol, NASCAR, Nerf, Power Rangers, Scooby-Doo, Star Wars, TED, Tony, Twilight Zone, Twitter, WWE, YouTube, Ziploc

Cover design by K. Kaynak, based on a design by Jennifer Rush

Interior layout by Jenny Perinovic

ISBN 978-1-939392-90-9 (paperback)
ISBN 978-1-939392-91-6 (e-book)

Printed in the United States of America

To all of the amazing, talented and hard-working YA bloggers who helped us to find our readers and who made our young adult debut so much fun. Thank you all!

Martineau Family:

Alexandra

Andrew:
Alex’s perfect(ly annoying) older brother

Grace:
Alex’s mother

James:
Alex’s father

Munchies’ Manor: Voled most likely to star in…

Emily (Counselor):
viral flash mob to Madonna’s
Vogue

Alex:
remake of the movie
10 Things I Hate About
You…and you… and you…

Trinity:
a psychic who shows up on
Supernatural
and dies the next episode without predicting it

Piper:
a survival reality TV game show

Siobhan:
an episode of
Jeopardy
where her lightning-fast answers short-circuit Watson

Jackie:
beach volleyball Team USA Olympic final match-up

Yasmine:
an advice talk show with better ratings than Oprah

Divas’ Den: Voted most likely to star in…

Victoria (Counselor):
live-action version of
Sleeping Beauty
where she sleeps happily ever after

Hannah:
10 Steps to Squash Your Mean Girl Battitude
infomercial

Brittany:
the worst
Buffy
remake ever—Buffy saves vampires and kills humans

Rachel:
beach volleyball Team USA with Jackie in Olympic finals—GOLD!

Brooke:
Battle of the YouTube Has-Beens

Nia:
a Broadway hit show about a YouTube star—wins Tony

Kayla:
a teen remake of
Home Alone Again… Typical

The Wander Inn: Voted most likely to star in…

Bruce (Bam-Bam) (Counselor):
remake of the movie
Rambo
, without mumbling so people understand lines

Rafael:
documentary that follows his win at the World Chess Federation

Julian:
a TED talk where he uses
Lord of the Rings
as an analogy for global warming

Vijay:
Jersey Shore: The Movie

Danny:
an episode of
Life in Your Parents’ Basement

Garrett:
Project Runway
, and he never hears the words
“auf wiedersehen”

Warriors’ Warden: Voted most likely to star in…

Rob (The Hottie) (Counselor):
any Nicholas Sparks movie

Javier:
a top-rated Venezuelan cooking show

Eli:
a reboot of
Punk’d
on MTV

Devon:
a commercial for an Internet dating site where he’s the only single guy

Jake:
his own workout video franchise:
Cray-Cray

Cameron:
(Appear on
People
magazine’s cover as the ‘Sexiest Man Alive’… in a photo-shopped version)

Buster:
the WWE; code name: Bust-A-Move

Lake Juniper Point Director:

Mr. Woodrow (Gollum):
most likely to star in an extreme medical emergency video where his whistle is surgically removed from his stomach…again

Alex

“Martineau family? You’re on in ten minutes.”

BLISS Network’s waiting room door snapped shut behind a tired-looking intern, and my father leaped into action.

“Alex, wipe that goop off your mouth. Andrew, use a double Windsor knot on your tie. Dear, help Andrew. And for God’s sake, everyone stay calm. We’re going live on national television, so no mistakes.” My father stopped pacing, and his eyes locked with mine. I flinched and studied my “gently used,” secondhand black loafers. Sensible shoes for raising sensible kids, I mentally quoted from one of their
Wholesome Home
parenting blog posts. Though there was nothing practical about the blisters forming on my pinched toes.

“So the producers think we’ve got a shot at getting our own talk show?” said my older brother, Andrew, from the couch. Mom’s dress sleeves fluttered as she straightened his tie.

Dad beamed. “Last I checked, our site had over ten million followers and our book is still on the bestseller list, so I’d say yes, champ, we’ve got a good chance, unless—” His gaze pinned me down again. “Unless anyone breaks our
Wholesome Home
rules. That’s why everyone is on their best behavior this summer. BLISS is sending surprise camera crews to check in on each of us sometime over the next couple of months. We won’t know until the fall if we’re filming a pilot.”

I avoided his warning look, grabbed a tissue, and rubbed off my clear lip gloss. It figured that eagle-eyed Dad would notice my small rebellion against his no-makeup rule, which even the studio’s hair and makeup team had been forced to follow. What had I been thinking? I crumpled the tissue, chucked it at the trash, and missed. It wasn’t like I got away with anything. Ever. Take the long-sleeved shirt and maxi-length skirt I wore. My mother had scoured clearance racks for weeks before she’d found something horrible enough to meet my father’s approval.

“Excuse me, young lady.” Dad towered over me in a tailored suit, his salt-and-pepper hair clipped a precise quarter of an inch above his ears. “Is this the action of a
Wholesome Home
teen?” He held out the tissue, not bothering to wait for my answer. “Now throw it away properly.”

“I was going to pick it up.” I grabbed the paper and strode closer to the basket, trying to keep a lid on my frustration.

“What did you say?”

My hand froze over the container. In a few days I’d be at Camp Juniper Point and away from Dad’s control, I reminded myself. With friends. Having fun.

“I said that I planned to get it. It’s not like I’d leave it there.” Would they ever stop blowing every mistake I made into something major? Sure. I made lots of them. But rarely the same ones twice. Or three times anyway. Four max.

Andrew smirked, a mini-version of my father in his dark suit and patriotic tie. My mother paled and mouthed “stop” at me.

Dad stepped closer, frowning.

“When I give you an order, you do it. Got it? No back talk.”

Mom joined us and wrapped an arm around my tense shoulders. “She was only trying to explain herself.”

“When I want an explanation, I’ll ask for one.” His flinty eyes sparked my trigger-ready anger.

“And when will that be? You never asked for an explanation about the text message.” My voice rose with my temper. “The one that asked if I still wanted to be a virgin.” The pent-up words flew from my mouth before I could stop them. And then, suddenly, I didn’t want to dam myself up like the rest of my family. Never talking about anything real. Ignoring problems instead of dealing with them. The whole mess simmered inside me, ready to boil over any second.

“Alex, honey, this isn’t the time,” Mom whispered. “And people will hear you.”

“So what if they do?” I scooted away when she leaned close. A kiss would not make this hurt better. “Maybe they want to hear me, even if you don’t.”

“Pipe down. Now.” Dad spoke through gritted teeth.

“Yeah, Alex. Do you want to ruin Mom and Dad’s chances for this show?” Andrew tried the reasonable approach, Mr. Perfect Son always taking my parents’ side. Never hearing mine.

“Shut it, Andrew.” Angry tears stung my eyes. I sounded horrible, yet I couldn’t stop myself. If only I was the damsel-in-distress type of girl people rushed to comfort. My instinct was to fight back, which never got me sympathy. I wouldn’t be appearing as a cartoon princess anytime soon.

I squared my shoulders to face Dad again. “No matter what I say, you believe the worst. You’d rather send me to a jail disguised as an all-girls boarding school than deal with this or me. “And yes—” A bitter laugh escaped me. “I saw the admissions application on your desk. A New Day Alternative Boarding School for Girls. You’re not the only ones who can snoop.”

My mother’s breathy intake nearly sucked the oxygen out of the room.

Dad’s face turned a shade darker than his tie. “Don’t tempt my patience.” When he leaned close, I smelled the coffee on his breath. “If we didn’t already have our overseas mission itinerary set, you’d be locked in your room all summer until we sent you away.”

“Honey,” Mom broke in. “What your father means is that you should consider these two months a trial. As long as we don’t hear of any misbehavior at camp, you won’t have to go.”

Dad harrumphed. “You will not ruin our shot at a talk show. Got it?”

Oh, I got it all right. Mom wasn’t fooling me. There was no trial because I’d already been found guilty. The sentence delivered. Ten months at A New Day School of Torture and Suffering.

I forced myself to speak over the pain squeezing my chest. “Because that’s what really matters, right? Your precious career?” I shook my mother’s hand off my wrist. “All I am is your personal cross to bear.” I quoted from one of the many blog posts they’d written about raising a problem child like me.

In the silence while I waited, stupidly, for my parents to disagree, I flopped in a nearby chair. Emptiness smothered my fire. No matter what I said or did, I would never be good enough. I tugged at the scratchy collar digging into my neck and swallowed past the painful lump clogging my throat.

My parents were the authority on raising wholesome kids. Or one, anyway. Every teacher asked me why I couldn’t be more like my perfect brother, Andrew. Worse yet, teachers who were
Wholesome Home
fans groaned when they spotted my name on their class list and handed me detention slips for stuff other kids got away with all the time. But that wasn’t a mystery. They were all too happy to give quotes about me for the blog. I was a public relations nightmare to my parents. Nothing more.

Well, I was also one more thing: ammunition for their recent bestseller,
Discipline with Love: The Wholesome Home’s Answer to Problem Behavior
. At least I had my uses. I rubbed my eyes. No way would I let them see me cry.

The door swooshed open, and a man with a headset and clipboard gestured to us.

“All set?”

“You bet!” shouted Dad, Mom, and Andrew, exhibiting our standard family cheer for public appearances. Only I couldn’t join in. Not when I was a prop for the movie set of their so-called perfect life.

“Happy faces!” urged the usher guy as I slouched by him and into the dark hall leading up to the set. My mother’s cold hand slipped into mine and squeezed.

We took our seats as technicians clipped microphones to our shirts.

“And we’re live in five,” blared an announcer, “four…” He held up three fingers, two, then one, followed by a point that seemed to animate
Wake Up America’s
host, Kevin Stiller.

“It’s time to wake up, America, and meet the Martineaus, authors of the
Wholesome Home
parenting blog and their most recent bestseller,
Discipline with Love: The Wholesome Home’s Answer to Problem Behavior
. Please give a warm welcome to James.” Wild applause broke out. “Grace.” Louder applause. “Andrew.” A few whistles mixed with the clapping. “And Alex.” The crowd’s hush was punctuated with a few disappointed sighs.

I slid lower in my chair, my damp hands twisting in my lap. Ouch. All the audience knew about me was what they read. And that wasn’t pretty. If only I could tell my side of the story.

“So, James…” Kevin Stiller leaned forward in his chair. “Can you give us a quick summary of your
Wholesome Home’s
parenting philosophy?”