Captured Devil's Blaze MC Book 1 (16 page)

I can’t remember ever feeling this fucking tired and old. I’m lying in bed with Beth and she just now fell asleep after crying for over an hour. She demanded I take her to see Beast and I put her off until tonight. I want to go check on my brother too, but I’m going to be in the office watching as I blow Colin’s fucking empire to smithereens. I’m hoping to get the holdings in France too. I have some connections working on that.

I hate seeing my woman hurt, and I know it’s my fault. I should have handled this shit differently. I’m dealing with a lot of fucking guilt for the hell I’ve asked my brothers to step into. I’m dealing with even more of it when I think about what I cost Beast. He’s going to undergo quite a few skin grafts. There will be some horrible scarring on his body and his face, and it’s not even certain that he’ll be okay. A body can die when the burns they suffer are too bad and extensive. The main problem is, when he comes out, I’m pretty fucking sure he’s going to want to die. Fuck, when I think of that beautiful little girl of his, I can’t say I’d blame him.

I kiss Beth’s forehead and my finger catches a stray teardrop she either shed while sleeping or had trapped in the corner of her eye and just now escaped. I ease off the bed and pull the covers over her, putting a pillow where I was laying. Beth doesn’t move. She’s exhausted from the tears, I’m sure. Hell, I can’t even suppress a yawn that escapes when I stand up, stretching the kinks out of my back. I’d love nothing more than to crawl in bed with my woman. Was it just a day ago we were fucking happy and I was mapping out our future?

It seems like a lifetime ago.

I make my way topside to the office. I don’t bother shutting the door; the only ones stirring around outside of the shelter are patched-in members and we all know what’s happening tonight. We’re just hoping it’s successful. The mood is a mixture of sadness, stress, and nervous hope. The result is that there’s tension in the air so thick you could cut that crap with a knife.

“Hey, boss. Beth okay?” Briar asks.

I slap him on the back of the head. “Motherfucker, talking about dicks with my woman. Much more of that shit and you won’t have a dick, and all you’ll be able to do is talk about them.”

Fucker just laughs and I flip him off.

I take my usual seat. Above our table, there are a total of six flat screens hanging on the wall. The screens are about twenty-seven inches, big enough to see clearly. Each screen has a different piece of property. There’s the casino, the gym where the underground cage-fighting takes place, a bar, a couple strip joints, and finally the estate where Colin and Matthew live. Tonight, it’s these six. Tomorrow night, a different six have been staked out. I expect security will increase after tonight, so they’ll be harder to do, but not impossible. Nothing’s impossible if you have a reason to do it—and we do, a fucking big reason and a thirst for revenge.

“How long ‘til show time?” I ask Torch.

He looks down at that damn watch he’s always wearing. “In about two minutes, Boss man.”

I nod. And we all sit and just stare. We’re quiet, all of us. Even Pistol has cut down his sarcasm. Sabre is sitting at a laptop and Torch gives him a signal. You can hear the tapping of the keys, the room is that quiet. Then, the screen in the bottom starts as the bar explodes. Wood and other debris go everywhere as flames swallow the screen.

My men don’t celebrate; real lives were just taken. Collateral damage sucks and it makes it hard for me to continue, but fuck, you have to do what you have to do. The Donahues called war on me, and I can’t exactly tell everyone to leave the bar if they want to live.

Up next are the strip joints. A similar scene to the first one unfolds on the second television followed by the one beside it. The gym makes me smile. That one’s not collateral damage; every fucker in that joint was dirty and owned by the Donahues. There’s a pause before the next one hits. It’s huge. The casino starts with one explosion in the back of the building. I hear Sabre typing on the computer again, and another explosion goes off in the same building, closer up, then another, and another. In total, a series of six bombs combine to bring that fucker down. I watch as people run from that building; I hope the innocent ones got out, but again, it’s out of my control.

I release a breath of air that I didn’t even know I was holding. The next hit is the most important. Hell, I’m even praying that we take out Colin with this one, even if I do know it’s a longshot. Torch already warned me there will be a five minute delay between it and the other bombs. I look around at my men. Each one is a good man, a man who for one reason or another pledged themselves to my club and my leadership, and I do feel like I’ve let them down.

“Men,” I say, addressing them. “I should have thought more about how my actions would affect each of you. I don’t normally back down from a fucking fight—and Beth is my old lady, that made her one of us—but doing that cost Beast something so precious I can’t begin to imagine how he will live with that. That’s on me. This is my fucking fault. I shouldn’t have claimed Beth and went full steam ahead.”

“Boss,” they all start. Well, not all; Pistol’s shooting me I-told-you-so’s from across the room, even if he isn’t giving them voice.

“No, let me finish,” I insist. “I made a mistake, and for that I’m sorry.”

The room is silent.

“You would have let her go and backed away to keep from going into war?” This comes from Briar and I can hear the disgust in his voice.

“Fuck, no. I would have claimed her anyway. I just would’ve thought twice about making it my club’s problem. Beth’s my woman. I’m not giving her up for anyone.”

“Then fuck you. We’re a club because we have each other’s backs. That includes Beth. Besides, I like her.”

“Same here,” Torch speaks up, but he doesn’t look away from the monitor he and Sabre are working on. In fact, every member here, even Pistol, seem to agree. I still feel the guilt in my stomach, but that tight knot inside me loosens at their support.

Then the fireworks start. Colin and Matthew’s house blasts apart before our eyes. Honestly, we put twice the charge in that fucker. We had to. We knew we wouldn’t get a second chance, and it was harder than hell to get through the gates, even disguised as groundskeepers and security guards. Still, it’s done, and every fucker in the room cheers.

In a few days, their private yacht and some of their favorite things will be toast. They wanted war and the motherfuckers are getting it, one delicious slice at a time.

When I woke up and found Skull gone, my heart hurt. I still can’t believe this mess went so horribly wrong that it took Beast’s beautiful little daughter’s life. I’m consumed by guilt. If I had just given Skull up when Colin demanded it, none of this would have happened. What makes that thought even worse is that, despite everything, I don’t know if I could go back and give him up. I don’t know what kind of horrible person that makes me, but I know it’s disgusting.

I slide out of bed and decide to go and find him. I want to hold onto him. I hope tonight delivers the message that Skull wants to get across. I’m praying it ends the war before it can escalate further. I just don’t think it will. I look around the hall of the shelter, but luckily everything looks pretty deserted, probably because it’s so late. Skull said he’d hoped to be back by nightfall, but they had some problems infiltrating the house that Colin and Matthew owned even with me giving them security codes. I can’t figure out why they hadn’t changed the codes, but I figure it’s arrogance. I honestly don’t think Colin thought I would betray him. Then again, he thinks I’m eventually going to cave and accept that I will be his one day. I’d rather die.

Once I’m at the main structure, I make my way to Skull’s office. The door is open, but I’m frozen in my tracks as I watch the explosions on the television screen. My hand comes to my mouth as I try and stop sound. I recognize each of the places, of course, and one after one I watch as they are destroyed. As I watch each of the businesses go up in smoke, I feel hope bloom in my chest. Maybe Skull was right and Colin didn’t know who he was messing with. I should have had more faith. I start to go into the room to be there with Skull. I want us to be side by side as we watch Colin’s house go up in flames. Maybe a little of Skull’s attitude is rubbing off on me. I smile at the thought, but before I can take one step, I freeze.

“… Beth is my old lady, that made her one of us—but doing that cost Beast something so precious I can’t begin to imagine how he will live with that. That’s on me. This is my fucking fault. I shouldn’t have claimed Beth and went full steam ahead.”

His words strike me and each feels as if someone is driving a nail through my heart. The final blow is the one that wounds me in ways that I will never heal from:
I shouldn’t have claimed, Beth
. I knew Skull would regret it. All along I did, but he kept insisting he wouldn’t. He got upset with me when I tried to leave and now he’s just as good as telling his men I shouldn’t be here, that being with me was wrong…
is
wrong.

I feel the tears fall again. I need to get away before Skull sees me. If he does, he’s liable to lie to me again because he doesn’t want to hurt me. It’s better I found out his true feelings now. I can’t even be mad at him. I felt the same way before he convinced me I was wrong.

I back away slowly and, only when I’m at the end of the hallway, far away from Skull’s office, do I take off running. I make it back to my room, slam the door, then lay on the bed and let the tears fall. There’s a chance that Skull is successful tonight, and if he is, maybe it won’t matter anymore.

In truth, me being here has already cost Beast everything. Will he be able to survive everyday with me here as a reminder of what I cost him?

I need to see Beast. I dry up my eyes. I’ll go to the hospital with Skull. I’ll stay by Beast’s side and nurse him through, then make my decision. If Beast hates me, I need to leave. If Skull is wrong and this strike doesn’t take Colin down, then I still need to leave. Skull says he loves me and I know I love him. I can’t turn my back on that if there’s any other way around it.

I’m going to hold out for a miracle.

“
Mi cielo?
Are you okay?”

I look up to see Skull standing there. I ignore his question. He knows the answer to it, even if he doesn’t know that I heard him upstairs. “Were you successful?” I ask him instead.

“I think so,
si
. We’ll find out more in the light of day. We’ll begin phase two then, too.”

I give him a tight smile. “Are you ready to go see Beast?”

“Are you sure you’re up to it,
querida?”

“I want to see him. Do you think he will care if I’m there, though?” I ask him, worried.

“They have him drugged right now because of the pain and other things. I doubt he’ll know you’re there, sweetheart. We can go tomorrow if you’d rather.”

“Can we do both?”

He looks at me for a few minutes. I’m afraid he can read my thoughts.

“You do know this is not your fault, right? No one’s to blame for what happened to Beast’s daughter—except
Colin
.
He
did this,
not
you.”

“He did it because of me.”

“Bullshit. If anything, he did it because of me and my mouth. You hold no blame in this, sweetheart.”

His words hurt me because I just keep replaying what he told his men. I swallow down the pain and try to give him a smile. I don’t exactly succeed, but I try. “Let’s go,” I urge him, walking over to him.

Skull takes both of his hands and places them on each side of my face. He pulls me closer to him and I breathe in the scent of oil, leather, and man that I’ve come to associate with Skull. He kisses my forehead gently and holds me like that for a few minutes. Then he pulls away, takes my hand, and leads me out of the room.