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Authors: J. L. Krajcirovic

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BOOK: Capturing Savannah
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The th
ree of us are done eating and there are students waiting for seats so we take our trays to the dirty dishes area. We walk to the front lobby to look out the windows. And Dax and Emily accompany me outside under the awning so I can snap a few more pics of the downpour. The water is pooled right out the doors where we are standing. I can see flooding in the street across the way, too.

When we go back in
side there is a small crowd of students gathered around the big screen TV in there.

“Tropical storm Gaston has now been classified as Hurricane status
, Category One. In Savannah we can expect flooding and lots of rain. The direction of the storm has changed. South Carolina residents in low-lying Charleston and Georgetown counties were urged to evacuate earlier today. This was a voluntary evacuation to move to higher grounds. But now residents are instructed to stay put in their homes or shelters and stay out of the storm. In the Charleston area several bridges are being closed to larger vehicles and trucks in anticipation of Hurricane Gaston making landfall between tonight and tomorrow evening….” The news reporter says.

There is a mixture of concern and relief among the crowd of students. I feel mostly relief. Relief that I know
David is far away from the storms main path. Though it wouldn’t surprise me if there is at least a little rain where he is at.

The news is saying the same things over and over again so the three of us decide to go back upstairs.
We linger on the stoop and I get some more shots of the blurry sheets of rain and hint of buildings and trees peeking through. And some shots of Dax and Emily’s figures blurred with the sheets of rain in detail by changing the depth of field and shudder speed settings.

“Hey you girls
want to come over and watch a movie? I got a bootleg version of
The Day After Tomorrow
?” Dax says.

“Totally. I love Jake Gyllenhall.” Says Emily a little too excitedly if you ask me.

“Pass for me. I have some more work to do.” I say.

“What? Come on Thea. All work and no play makes Thea a dull girl.” Says Emily.

“I know. Sorry. I’ll see you later though.” I say snapping more shots with my camera and walking to our room. At the same time being careful not to slip on the slick walkway. I unlock the room and go inside dropping my camera softly on the bed and plopping down next to it. The blinds are still open from earlier so I stare at the window for a little while.

The phone in our room rings and brings me out of my intense stare.

“Hello?” I say.

“Thea?”
David says on the other end of the phone.

My heart skips a beat. “Hi
David! I am glad you called. I miss you. Everything ok? When will you be back?” I say. I am about to ask another question along these same lines but he interrupts.

“Thea. I need to talk to you.” He says.

“Ok.” I say back staying silent so he can talk.

“Thea. I am not coming back.” He says.

“What do you mean?” I ask.

“I’m not coming back to school.
So this was a sort of goodbye call.” He says.

I stay quiet for a few minutes not sure I am understanding what he is saying.

“So what happened? You can tell me what’s going on.” I say.

“My funds aren’t going through. And I am not going back to school. It’s that simple.”
David says calmly. “I am glad we met Thea. I am glad we are friends. Good friends.”

“Yes
. Friends.” I say remembering that was what I told him I had wanted before.

“We’re friends so we can stay in touch if you want.” He says.

I stay quiet not sure what I want to say right now.

“Ok. Well….Goodbye Thea.” He says.

All
I manage to say back is, “Goodbye David.”

He hangs up
the phone so I hang up the phone. I sit still on my bed very confused by what just happened. Things were so good between us. But I guess that is how it is between friends. I mean that is what we were right? That is what I said I wanted to be to him on more than one occasion.

After sitting there for a good twenty minutes
I try to get back into working on school stuff, but I can’t concentrate. I decide to march over to David and Dax’s room. Dax must not have told me everything. By the way he was acting it was like he knew something was up. He must have talked to David about all this.

C
arefully on slick floors I march to Dax’s room and knock aggressively on the door.

“Hey.”
Dax says smiling a little when he opens the door.

“Can I come in?” I ask.

“Ya come watch the movie with us.” He says.

When I walk in I notice I don’t see any of
David’s things. All of his framed photos are gone. His sketchbook and art supplies are gone. The comforter and sheet set on his bed are gone.

“So you knew he wasn’t coming back?” I ask
Dax abruptly.

“Didn’t he tell you?”
Dax asks.

“He did about
fifteen minutes ago.” I say back angrily.

“Thought you knew Thea. I saw the note from him on the whiteboard and you were acting like you were upset so I figured he must have told you.” He says.

“Told me what? What did he tell you?” I ask.

“He didn’t tell me anything. I woke
up and he and all his stuff were just gone.” Dax says.

“Really?” I say back
not really believing him.

“Yes really. I care about you Thea. Trust me I would have told you if I thought you didn’t know.”
Dax says.

“So I
was going to ask earlier when the room seemed a bit empty, but wait David’s gone like for good?” asks Emily.

“Yes.”
I say trying hard to keep it together.

“Well who needs him? We have college things to do. Let’s watch the movie.” Emily says.

I don’t say anything back still too confused by the hurt I am feeling to really say much. So I give in and sit down to watch the movie. Dax sits in the middle between both of us girls. And it’s annoying because I can tell he enjoys it. I might also be on edge a little too though. I stare at the TV screen but don’t pay attention to anything that I am blankly watching. Not even sure what this movie is or what it’s about. And who cares really right now? All I care about right now is what happened with David. Is he okay? Why did he just leave? I wish I could understand.

I notice the screen is black suddenly so the movie ended.
Both Dax and Emily are sitting up on the edge of the side of the bed and talking, it feels like they don’t remember I am sitting here.

“Ok guys. I
am a little tired. I am gonna turn in to bed.” I say.

“Right behind you.” Says Emily.
“Thanks Dax. It was fun.”

We walk in silence to our room in the midst of the down
pouring rain. I don’t mind the rain because I think it’s going to help me sleep tonight. We get back to our room and tumble into bed.

The next morning the rain is still coming down like it was when I hit my pillow.
It’s a school day but I am not feeling like I will be able to get out of bed today. The rain and storm is the excuse I can use, but I know it’s because of David. I want my friend back here with me, in school. I want to be more than friends with him. But I realize he has other things going on it. And that he probably didn’t feel the same I am feeling. It kind of hurts all over. I roll over and drift off to sleep again. The next time I wake up Emily, Micah and Remy are standing over me.

“Ah hi…guys.” I mumble.

“Time to get up. You have been asleep all day.” Remy says.

“The rain makes me tired.” I say.

“Well it’s time for dinner. And we are all going downstairs together.” Emily says.

“Give me ten minutes. Ok?” I say grumpily.

They back off and I get up to get dressed and brush my teeth. Don’t bother brushing my hair though. Don’t care much about how it looks or if it’s sticking up. In about ten minutes as promised I open the door to outside my room where they are gathered together talking and looking at the rain. They look at me but don’t say anything to me, just keep their conversations going as we walk to the elevator. As we go through the cafeteria line I put food on my plate but none of it really looks or sounds good to me right now. We all sit down. The gang continues talking about driving somewhere but I don’t listen too closely just pick at my food.

“So are you coming with us Thea?
Eh?” Micah asks.

“I don’t know
. Where are you going?” I ask back.

“What do you mean weren’t you listening?”
says Emily

“Sorry. Where are you going then?” I ask again.

“On Friday we are going to Bulls Bay close to Charleston.” Remy says.

“What for?” I ask.

“That’s where the hurricane hit this morning. The school is sending some relief efforts to bring water and clothes. They think the flooding will go down by then. We figured you would want to take some pictures at least.” Says Emily.

“Oh. Ya. That sounds like an interesting trip.
How are we all getting there though?” I ask.

“Max is driving one of the school vans.” Emily says.

“We have to sign some waivers saying the school is not liable and stuff. But it’s kind of a done deal.” Says Remy.

I’m still picking at my food and I notice the silence. When I look up everyone is looking at me.

“I said ok. I’ll go.” I say wishing the attention was not on me right now.

“So what is the damage then from the storm?” I ask hoping that helps them stop focusing on me.

“In Charleston the high winds destroyed forty something structures and homes. It blew down branches, trees, power lines, signs and fences. Lots of flooding causing closed roads.” Says Micah.


It kind of skipped Florida. It moved through North Carolina with torrential downpours and now it’s in Virginia.” Says Remy.

“Oh that’s good.” I say. Thinking about how it didn’t hit Florida. My friends are all staring at me and I realize how that must have sounded. “I mean I am glad it lessened strength and turned into rain.”
They move on from my comment and start talking about other things.

The rest of the week goes by quickly
and most of the days are pretty forgettable and uneventful. I make it to class on Wednesday and Thursday and do some experimenting in the darkroom with the rain and beach pictures I have already taken. I play with the exposure times really pushing the contrast of the images so there is a high amount of black and white. Even though the film was color the images are mostly colorless.

Friday comes quickly. The gang all meets downstairs with our bags ready to travel to Charleston in the school van being driven by Max.
The rain has ceased but you can still feel the lingering of the overcast clouds and humidity in the air. It might as well be raining though because I am drenched in sweat.

The van is filled to the brim with
food, water, and clothing supplies. Emily, Micah, Dax, Remy and I pile into the back. It’s cramped so we are all pressed against each other. I am pressed between Emily and Dax, which I can’t help but suspect Dax planned all along. We each brought a pack or bag of some kind, but me with camera gear looks like I should have brought a suitcase.

“Got enough stuff Thea?” Remy says
playfully. “How many boxes of pink hair dye do you need?

“Ha. Funny.” I say back and I can feel a hint of a smile on my face.
For that few seconds it feels nice, normal. But then it fades and I think about David saying goodbye. The hurt comes crashing back into me kind of like the storm did. I try to just let my thoughts of David wash over me. And they do every now and then when I focus on the gang, but when I stop it crashes back into my head, into my stomach.

Chapter E
ight

 

I like the repetitive motion of pushing the photo print paper around with the tongs, maybe a little too much. The print turns out really dark, too dark. It’s a combination of keeping it in the developer solution for too long and keeping it on the enlarger for too long. As I hang it up the rich blacks have a dark red glow, but that might just be an effect of the amber over lighting too. I can’t believe it’s been almost three weeks since Hurricane Gaston. And also three weeks since David left. It’s also time to finish the photo assignment on a happening, force, or event with a series of 20 images. Earlier in the week I selected five negatives from the rain hitting the stoop or dorms, nine from the rain at the beach, and six from the aftermath of Charleston. I am not sure if it tells a strong enough story. But I think I like the way the amount of contrast changes among the shots it helps show the strength and progression of the weather.

There are only a few people in the dark room since it’s Friday night so I am able to h
ang all 20 images with the clothespins and stand back for a few minutes to look at them. The images in the beginning are white and grey tones with a hint of blue. They show the raindrops clearly at first and then transition into less clear images of sheets of rain, a few of those from the stoop. The shots in the middle from the beach start of with a lot of grey tones. There are a few images with people running through the rain and the ocean tide and that is when the contrast starts to really change into a lot of rich blacks, hints of red and bright whites. Almost like this build up of force. The contrast continues into the images of Charleston. The images start as close ups of uprooted trees then piles of ruble. They are very dark in tone. Then they start to even out more in contrast. There is an image of the thin traces of drooping power lines against a light pink sky and white clouds. Another image of a beach with eroded marks in the light grey sand and a few pieces of trash.

I redo a few of the images in the middle at the beach to make the transition of contrast a little more
defined. It reminds me of the color theory project when I painted the grayscale from white to black only these images start with white, go to greys, then blacks, then whites and blacks, and then to grey. I stare at the pictures letting them dry and the chemicals set. After awhile I step out into the other room and call Emily.

“Hey Emily. I’m
about done at the lab can you give me a ride back?” I say.

“Only if you do me a favor too.” She says.
There is a moment of silence before she says “I am kidding of course I will give you a ride. But you will owe me a favor.”

“Ok. Thanks Emily.” I say wondering what I am getting myself into now.

“I’ll be there in like fifteen. Wait inside till I get there.” Emily says before hanging up.

I walk to the soda machine killing time and letting my prints dry a little longer.
As I sip my root beer I slowly walk back to the darkroom. The prints look done if not close to being set so I carefully fold them in-between thin pieces of matte board. Laying each one in an empty photo paper box as I go. I gather everything up and zip up my backpack. I exit the darkroom and head to the photo lab entrance to wait inside the glass doors. I see the blue mini cooper as soon as it pulls up. I rush out the doors and jump into the car nearly startling Emily.

“Phew. Hey Thea. You in a hurry or something?” she asks.

“Just ready to head back is all.” I say without glancing towards the alleyway.

“Alright. Let’s go then. No time to waste.” She says.

We zip off in her car and back to the dorms. On the way I think about what David said to me that day after the alleyway. That I didn’t deserve something like what might have happened to me. It makes me miss him. When we get out of the car I notice how dressed up she is. She is wearing a frilly pink spaghetti strap top, a black skirt, and knee high black boots. She has on gobs of makeup and pink dangly earrings. I say “Hi” to Max as we ride the elevator up.

“So why all dressed up?” I ask her.

“Well you know how you owe me a favor. No moping about tonight, we are going to a party.” She says excitedly.

“A party? I am not that into parties.” I say.

“You agreed to a favor and this is it. I have the perfect outfit for you to wear too.” She says as we get out of the elevator and walk towards our room.

As I walk by our stoop I think of him. Of
David. Which I seem to do whenever I see this spot. I stopped going to the
Paper Moon
and
Vinnie Van GoGo’s Pizza
cause it just reminds me too much. But I can’t just stop going in and out of my room. I have to keep walking by this spot. The spot that we first met.

Walking into the room I say “
You’re right. I am tired of moping around. Ok I’ll go out. But I am picking what I wear. What is wrong with what I have on anyways?” Emily looks me up and down.

“Umm.
..”

“Ok don’t answer that. I guess I probably
do smell like photo chemicals anyways. Fine I’ll change.” I say.

As I am looking through my clothes the phone rings. Answering it I say “Hello.”

“Hi Thea.” Says a voice I was not expecting to hear from.

“Hi David.” I say back unsure what else to say.

“Thought I would call to see how you were doing.” He says.

His voice sounds a little off.
I can’t pick up any emotion from it.

“I am doing good. Staying busy with classes. And getting ready for a party.” I say.

“That’s good.” He says. His voice still free from emotion. “Where’s the party at?” he asks.

“Not sure actually. I am going with Emily.” I say.

There are a few minutes of silence on the line.


Well. Can I call you again another time?” He asks.

“Ok. Well it was good to hear from you.” I say back.

“Bye Thea.” He says.

Emily messes with her makeup while I get ready.
I grab a clean white t-shirt and a clean pair of jeans. Throwing on a light grey corduroy button up jacket over top. I slip on my light nude colored flats and sit on my bed Indian style. Emily is still getting ready so I gather my hair up into a messy ponytail. After sitting there a few minutes longer and thinking about that phone call I join Emily in front of the bathroom mirror.

“Better?” I ask her
spinning to show her my outfit.

“Almost.” She
says handing me a tube of lip-gloss and mascara. “Put these on.”

Reluctantly I do it.
Trying to get into the party mood but really just wanting to stay here in hopes he might call me back tonight.

“Ok. We are ready. We look hot.” She
says laughing and putting her arm in mine.

I am relieved when she says it’s just a few blocks away and we don’t have to drive.
I don’t want to have to worry about the driving part and someone getting behind the wheel. And I am glad I don’t have to go into Jacks and have that conversation with Emily right now.

We walk around the
corner past the square that is below our room. The bench is empty tonight. No signs of the man and the dog that usually claim it. But I am sure I will see Sam and his dog again later in the week. I owe him another lunch for helping with taking more shots in the homeless community. I have been adding to capturing photos of the homeless around the city. It’s something I have been finding rewarding and it’s helped me continue to deal with the guilt I feel from my brother Jack’s accident.

In a few minutes
walk we are there. I can tell by the music. Also by the people gathered in the yard and around the front porch each holding a plastic red cup. It’s noisy and some of them are already drunk.

“Great.”
I say quietly and sarcastically under my breath. This is going to be a super fun night. Emily leads us inside as she says “Hi” to a few people on our way in. The inside is even more crowded than the outside and the few rooms I can see down the hall are full of people too and again lots of red cups. I see a guy with a long black ponytail staring at Emily and pretending to make conversation with some other girl.


Hey is that…?” I say nodding my head in his direction.

“Oh my god. It’s Darren. He looks hot.” She says looking back at me.

“He is starring at you.” I say.

“Really?” Emily says back. I can tell she wants to go over there.

“Go. Go talk to him.” I say.

“Are you sure? You’ll have some fun tonight right?” she asks.

“I’ll be fine. Just go.” I say nudging her gently. It’s weird to see her look so giddy. I think her bull nose and eyebrow rings even sparkle as she walks off.

“Wanna drink?” I hear a guys voice say.

I look up and notice he is talking to me.

“It’s Thea right? He says.
“Grayson. We’re in photography together.”

“Oh right. Hi.”
I say.

“So what’s your poison?” he asks.

“My what?” I say.

“What are drinking tonight?”
he says.

“Umm I guess I’ll have what you
’re having.” I say.

“Beer it is.” He says smiling.
“Ok let’s get you that beer.”

He grabs my hand and guides us through the crowd.
It’s pretty packed so I let go, not able to keep up with him. Instead of standing there alone awkwardly I look for the kitchen where I assume is where the drinks are at. As I am worming my way through the maze of bodies an arm wraps around my shoulders. It’s some random drunk guy.

“Hi. Wanna hang out?” he
slurs.

“I’m good thanks. Going to get a drink.”
I say.

“You’re missing out on a good time?” He slurs again.

I keep moving through the bodies and finally end up in the kitchen. There is a keg and Grayson is pouring a red cup to the brim with beer.


There you are.” he says handing me the red cup and it sloshing a little in my hand.

A few girls line up and ask Grayson for a drink and he obliges.
Drunk guy from before bumps into me probably on purpose.

“Think I am going to head outside. Nice to see you Grayson.
Thanks for the drink.” I say as he goes on to talk to the girls he is pouring drinks for.

I
start to make my way to the door so I don’t have to stand in wall-to-wall people. As I am about to start down the steps another arm circles around my shoulders.

“Hey Thea! I didn’t know you would be here.”
Says Dax.

“Oh
! Hi Dax.” I say not liking his arm on me but glad it’s not some random guy again.

“Remy, Dean, and Micah are here too.
Come on I’ll show you.” He says.

“Alright.” I say back letting him keep his arm there for the moment to avoid getting stopped by anyone else.

These parties are all the same.
Guys hitting on anything that moves. Girls flirting or teasing. And all around too much drinking that may or may not end with someone getting behind the wheel that doesn’t belong there. That is probably the biggest reason of all that I don’t care for these sort of things. It’s too painful to think about. But I didn’t get dragged out here for nothing, I am going to make the best of it and try to have some fun.

Dax
leads us around the other side of the wrapped porch. The Savannah style wrapped porches can be charming. This one is wide and has a faded blue grey railing that follows the perimeter. The flooring is thick wooden planks that are a faded sandy brown and creak when you walk on them.

“Theeeaaaa!” shouts Remy when he sees me walking up. He hugs me causing
Dax to have to remove his arm from my shoulders.

“Thhhea!” chimes in Micah and Dean.

“Hi guys.” I say lifting my red plastic cup up to them and taking a swig of it.

“Chug. Chug. Chug. Chug.”
They all say in unison along with Dax. I figure it is a party so I might as well. I finish it.

“Nice.” Says
Dax. Taking my empty cup from me and setting it upside down on the railing next to us. There is a small line of empty cups running along it like some sort of drinking bragging system.

Micah goes to get us more beer.
All the guys are laughing in conversation and then there is commotion across the lawn that distracts me. It’s someone doing a keg stand. The cheering starts and everyone on the porch turns to look and join in on the cheering. Dax rests his hands on my shoulders kind of pepping us both along with the cheering. Pretty much everyone on the porch or outside is starring at the spectacle. Just watching. Everyone except one person who is facing the opposite direction kind of towards me. That seems odd and stands out to me so my eyes gravitate to that spot where they are standing. It’s not just anyone standing there. It’s David. My heart skips a beat and I think my breath catches too. I am starring in disbelief afraid to blink in case it’s not real.

BOOK: Capturing Savannah
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