Caroline (6 page)

Caro hopped up and ran barefoot across the wooden floor, curiously following Alec into the first large bedchamber. It was dominated by a huge canopy bed hung with blue-and-white drapes. However, Caro ran straight to the wall, giving a cry of delight at the sight of a little alcove bed. It was built right into the wall like a cupboard, and even had little doors to seal it off. Impulsively, Caro climbed the three-step ladder into the bed. Peeping out at Alec, she exclaimed:

"I've never seen anything so cozy! Couldn't we sleep in here?"

One of his black eyebrows shot up.

"
We?
If I were to share that bed with you there would be little sleeping done! Besides, I'm sure you would be much more comfortable in this big bed. Allow me to play the gentleman and occupy that—ah—closet."

She raised her chin. The sudden hardness in Alec's eyes and voice told her that she'd said the wrong thing, but his attitude confused her.

"No! I want this bed! In any event, that other one is more your size."

Alec stared at her for only a moment before replying, "Very well. Now won't you come out of there and put on some dry clothes? The last thing I need is for you to become ill."

Tears stung her eyes. It was not so much what Alec had said, but the tone of his voice that hurt. She climbed out of the bed, suddenly clumsy. After he left the room, Caro sank into a wing-back chair next to the window and allowed herself to weep. The rain drummed ceaselessly against the glass and the room seemed dark, cold, and cheerless, not unlike her situation. Her bare feet were like ice.

She realized now that all the events of the last two days had been made bearable because of Alec. His charm and warmth had chased away her fears, and his strength had lent her security as she surveyed a future filled with uncertainty. It was obvious that he was a rogue, but that only served to make all that was happening seem an exciting adventure. Yet today he had been different: cool, withdrawn, frowning.

Finally, Caro wiped her eyes with her sleeve. Telling herself that tears would solve nothing, she got up halfheartedly to look through the dresses in the wardrobe. They were mostly fashioned of wool or muslin in plain colors. However, one dress caught her eye. It was a lovely gown of sprigged muslin in green and yellow. The neckline was scooped low, trimmed with a narrow frill, and the waist was encircled by a wide sash. Hastily, Caro shed her wet boys' clothing, pulling off the hat as well. She found a plainly made chemise in the bureau, along with other undergarments and some clean white stockings.

As she dressed she felt her mood lighten. The looking glass over the bureau was hazy, but she could see that she looked lovely. She only regretted that Mrs. Wallingham had not been as amply endowed as she was. The neckline on the gown was cut low, and her breasts swelled up behind the ruffled trim, making Caro feel self-conscious. Still, she knew she looked pretty, and was determined to bring Alec out of his black mood.

Chapter 4

The tantalizing aroma of roasting meat filled the room, and there were carrots cooking in a pot over the fire as well. Alec had discovered them along with a few other staples, including a full bottle of brandy. He felt he had never needed a drink so much and was savoring it when the door opened and Caro hesitantly stepped out of the bedchamber.

Alec couldn't believe that she could look so beautiful. Her honey-gold hair shone bright in the firelight, sparks in her brown eyes seemed to challenge him, and her chin with its tiny cleft was raised. The indistinct lighting made it impossible to tell if it was defensiveness or defiance that he saw in Caro's face. His eyes raked her boldly then, lingering on the tempting bare curve of her bosom. Her waist was tiny, set off by the wide sash, and her ankles and stockinged feet looked fragile. Swallowing hard, he heard himself say:

"You have no shoes?"

"No. Mine are wet."

"I see." It seemed no woman had ever appealed to him as strongly as this one, the one he had sworn to protect. He took another swallow of brandy and felt its warmth course through his veins. Still, how much could a man bear? Why did she have to choose that gown, and why did she have to look at him in a way that sent powerful waves of longing over him?

Caro thought Alec looked more attractive than ever. He also had changed his clothes and now wore a fine white shirt with a cravat knotted expertly at his neck. His face was darkly handsome in the firelight.

They ate dinner quietly, hungrily, but she could sense that his mood had mellowed. Although he no longer seemed angry, it was as though he were guarding against softening toward her. His eyes seemed to be on her constantly, but Caro could not read their enigmatic expression.

When they had finished eating she went to sit by the fire and Alec came up behind her with two glasses of brandy.

"Sip this slowly," he told her. "It will keep you warm tonight."

He sat down beside her on the settle, stretched out his legs, and regarded her through narrowed eyes. Caro felt nervous and turned her attention to the glass of brandy. Sipping it warily, she was surprised to feel it burn her mouth then slide down her throat, spreading a delicious glow through her entire body. She beamed at Alec.

"This is wonderful! What is it?"

Alec allowed himself a small smile. "Come now,
ma petite.
Have you never tasted brandy?"

Offended by the mocking note in his voice, Caro replied, "I'm sure I haven't! That is, unless I've forgotten."

"Ah, yes," he drawled, "that must be the answer."

Caro was shocked to see the cynical twist to Alec's mouth. Flustered, she looked away and took small sips of the brandy, growing accustomed to the fiery sensation. They sat in silence for several minutes, and when Caro finally looked up she saw that Alec's face was shadowed and his eyes were darker, like glittering sapphires. Feeling flushed and light-headed, she heard herself laugh nervously.

"Alec! Why are you looking at me that way?"

His fingers closed around her arm, his touch sending a shiver of arousal through her. Alec traced a slow trail up the soft inside of her arm with one brown fingertip, stifling her efforts to breathe.

"You may drop the façade of innocence," he remarked in a low, even voice. "It was an effective charade, but it couldn't last. You have accomplished your purpose, for I desire you more than I have desired any woman in years. I believe that we'll deal very well together, for a long time to come."

The combination of the brandy and Alec's slowly caressing hand had rendered Caro insensible. His words came to her through a fog, making no sense at all. She tried to think as he reached out, grasping her hands, and pulled her to her feet.

"Alec, I—" Suddenly, his mouth came down over hers, driving the last bits of coherent thought from her mind. His arms held her against the length of his body while his tongue parted her lips, exploring deftly until an answering response blossomed deep inside her. When his mouth branded her neck, Caro was flooded with hot waves of desire, conscious of nothing except his kisses searing her skin and the warm tingling between her thighs. She barely felt him pick her up and carry her to the bedroom; the brandy had done its work of destroying her inhibitions, and the hungry way she responded to him dispelled any lingering doubts Alec might have held about her true nature. She gave him no resistance at all when he began to unfasten her dress.

"This gown was an excellent choice, my dear." He didn't see the confusion in Caro's eyes, which lasted only until he began kissing the soft curve of her shoulder. His mouth never left her body as he undressed her. She felt his face against her breasts and then his tongue on each taut crest, and the frissons of new sensation it evoked made her shudder. She hesitantly ran her hands through his shining hair as his lips traced a fiery pattern along the satiny surface of her abdomen until they reached her navel, then Caro felt him on top of her, his hard chest brushing her nipples. When she opened her eyes, Alec saw a desire in them to match his, and he kissed her ardently, bruising her tender mouth.

Parting her slim legs with his knee, he slid his hand down to caress her slowly, expertly, until she moaned aloud. The sound only intensified his arousal. Unable to wait another moment, Alec shifted and nudged his hardness against her, entering gradually until he encountered a surprising resistance. Caro's eyes were suddenly wide, ablaze with fear and confusion. She opened her mouth as if to protest, but he silenced her with his own lips and gentle movements that coaxed a primitive response from her. Gradually, he felt her arms encircle his neck as her body arched instinctively to meet his, her resistance torn away with a firm thrust. Their motions were rhythmically united until the moment of his release and his low moan that filled the softly lit room.

The violence of Alec's climax surprised him, as did the deep feeling of well-being that flooded him afterward as he buried his face in her damp neck. For a moment he couldn't move, then slowly he lifted himself away from Caro. She lay still for a long moments before opening her eyes. They were filled with tears of confusion. Alec propped himself on an elbow to touch her cheek with his free hand. The flashing grin she had grown to love was back, but at such cost!

"Ah, love, there's nothing to be afraid of! You were wonderful. As a matter of fact, I'm tempted to believe you have cast a spell over me."

Caro began to tremble, covering her breasts with her hands. Her face was pale, all her passion replaced by shock. Alec's smile faded and he sat up, thrusting aside the drapes around the bed to let in more firelight. When he turned back, he saw the stain beneath her thighs and stared in disbelief.

"Oh my God, Caro."

She shrank back into the corner of the bed like a wounded animal. Her hair fell all around her in a golden cloud, veiling her nakedness.

Muttering epithets, Alec quickly pulled on his breeches and strode to the bureau. He found a long bedgown and went to Caro, lifting her arms and pulling it over her head. He swept her hair out gently, smoothing it back from her face and buttoning up the high ruffled neck of the garment. She only stared at him. Alec bent and lifted her in his arms, carrying her out to the parlor to sit before the fire. He quickly produced a plump quilt and tucked it around her legs, then poured a small amount of brandy in a glass and held it to her lips.

"I know you must hate this stuff now, but maybe it will bring you out of that trance. Please take a sip, Caro."

She obeyed him mechanically, and the liquor had the desired effect. She sank back against the settle, covering her face with her hands.

"Oh, Alec," she choked, "what did I do?"

It was a great relief for him to hear her speak, and he sat down beside her, gathering her into his arms.

"Not you,
cherie
. I was the one at fault. What a fool I have been! I am an idiot. I promise you, when you feel better you may beat me if you like."

Her head was against his bare chest and she smiled in spite of herself. "It is a tempting suggestion, but I fear it would do no more good than that slap yesterday."

Encouraged, he tipped her chin up with his forefinger and stared into her eyes. "Caro, I was very wrong tonight. Nothing can change what I did to you, and I'll not ask you to forgive me. But, I think if we are going to travel together it is time we laid our cards on the table. My mistake with you was allowing myself to judge you tonight by the same standards I've used to judge other women I've known. I had slowly come to realize how different you were, but my desire to have you gave me an excuse to fall into the old trap. Actually," he smiled ruefully, "I suppose you were the one who was trapped."

Caro sat up, moving away from his chest. The warmth of his bare skin and the scent of him stirred her senses. She couldn't think clearly and was ashamed of her feelings now that she knew what they had led her to. The memory of what had happened between them had a dreamlike quality; only the vague burning pain between her thighs reminded her that it had been all too real. Curling into the opposite corner of the settle, she wrapped the quilt more tightly around her body as if for protection. She managed a small smile, for the expression on Alec's face made her feel sorry for him.

"Please don't look at me like that!"

"How can I not? There is no excuse for my behavior tonight. I'll be damned if I haven't been acting like a dolt since I first saw you. I can't understand it!" He brought his fist down on the arm of the settle. "I've known many women in my life and have always prided myself on my great self-control. Believe me, there's good reason why I have avoided virgins before tonight —that sort of involvement can get very sticky. I—" He stopped, closing his mouth and scowling as though sorry he had said so much. Caro leaned forward, laying her hand on his strong arm, then withdrawing it as if she'd been burned.