Carpe Diem (28 page)

“SHE WOKE UP?” I yell.

“I’m sorry I cannot release patient statuses to anyone but family,” she says while she nods her head yes.

“I have to see her,” I scream.

My mind is filled with a haze. The woman who took Jack from us has woken up. All those days of sitting at her bedside, staring at her, wishing I could explain to her exactly what she took from me. All those days of being happy that she was stuck in limbo.

Nancy can’t get around the nursing desk fast enough to stop me. I dart toward room 508, the room I have spent so many hours in. I place my hand on the knob and turn with no thought to what I will say when I get on the other side.

Kyle is startled when he sees it is me coming through the door. Helen has a look of confusion, why would she know me? She has been in a coma since that day. She slept for the last two years, peacefully unaware of what she took from me.

“Mrs. Reynolds, you can’t be in here!” Nancy yells, pulling at my arm.

“It’s okay, Nancy, thank you,” Helen says to my surprise.

“Are you sure?” Nancy asks before releasing my arm.

“Yes, thank you.”

I’m speechless. All the things I planned to say to a comatose Helen are gone from my mind. Never in a million years would I have thought she would ever wake up. Nancy informed me long ago that it didn’t look good and that they were basically waiting for her body to give up.

“Hello, Piper is it?” Helen says.

I look to Kyle before I confirm

“I already told her everything,” Kyle tells me.

“Yes, I’m Piper,” I say, forcing the words.

“Piper, I cannot tell you how sorry I am,” Helen tells me.

“I, I came here to…” I can’t finish my thought

“It’s okay, Piper, whatever you need to say to me I deserve it,” Helen tells me.

Kyle and Helen both stare at me waiting for me to speak. After a few moments, my heart starts to slow and I can breathe easier.

“How, how are you awake?” I ask.

“The doctors don’t know for sure, they are still waiting for some tests, but for now, they think her brain healed itself,” Kyle informs me.

“And how long have you been awake?”

“About a week,” she tells me.

“I see, and Kyle told you about Jack?”

“Yes, he did. Piper, I know that there is nothing I can say to bring your husband back, but please know how sorry I am. If I could take his place, I would.”

The words hang in the air. If she could take his place, she would. Nevertheless, she can’t. Jack is gone and now she lies here, awake, on her way to what appears to be a full recovery.

My anger starts to rear its ugly head and then I smell it. Coffee. I look around the room, not a coffee cup to be found, I open the door and look into the hallway. Nancy is standing at the nurses’ station. She looks and gives me an inquisitive look. I look around and see no one else. I close the door and turn my attention back to Helen and Kyle. It is then that a strange sensation comes over me. It is a calm that I have not felt in a long time, a calm that reminds me of why I am here today.

“Today is the two year anniversary, did you know that?” I ask.

“Yes, I know…” Helen starts.

“No please,” I interrupt.

“Okay.”

“Did you know that I used to visit you?”

“No, I didn’t.”

“I used to sit by your bedside and tell you about all the things I thought I wanted to say to your face. I would tell you how you deserved to die for what you took from me.”

“Piper…”

“No, let me finish.”

“All right.”

“I used to tell you about all the things Jack was missing out on, how much I missed him, and how much I hated you. I would dream about a day that I would get to say all those hurtful things to you.”

I can see the tears forming in her eyes. Mine are falling down my cheeks.

“But today I came to offer my forgiveness.”

Kyle’s head springs up. He had been staring at the floor avoiding eye contact while I had my little speech. Helen’s tears are flowing faster than mine.

“I admit, I was shocked when I found you awake as I thought I was going to be talking to the same Helen I had for the last two years. But that shouldn’t change why I am here. I am glad to be able to say this to you as you are now.”

“Piper, I don’t deserve your forgiveness. I took your husband from you and that is unforgivable.” Helen sobs.

“You have it nonetheless. I forgive you. You did not set out to take my husband from me, you made a mistake. You have paid for it with two years of your life taken from you.”

“Piper I… I…” Helen tries to speak, but the tears hold back her words.

“I will leave you to it, I won’t be back. I need to move on from this and I can’t do that if I am holding on to such anger toward you.” I say, reaching for the door handle.

“I don’t know what to say,” Kyle says.

“Nothing needs to be said. All I ask is that you live the best life you can and seize each day as if it could be your last,” I say and then exit the room.

T
he walk to the car seems to take only a few seconds. I do not remember walking down the hall, getting on the elevator, or exiting the hospital. My thoughts were consumed with Jack.

I know in my heart that Jack was with me moments ago giving me the strength to do what was right. I know that he was standing next to me giving me the courage to forgive. As soon as I left the room, I felt he was gone. As if he had been with me, watching over me, waiting to be there for me this one last time.

I hesitate to put the key in the ignition, I need a minute or two to sit and do nothing. I pay no attention to any one thing as I look around the parking lot. People are coming and going from the hospital. Today is the last day I would be one of these people. I look over to the right and see there is a tree not far from my car that looks like a tree Jack would have liked. I reach slowly into my purse search for the small red piece of mug I had originally planned to leave with Helen.

I jump out of my car and walk over to the tree. At the base, I use my hands to dig a small hole and place the shard into it before I refill it. A smile comes to my face and I know that I have done the right thing today, for me and for Jack. My dark secret is done and will not cloud my path to being happy.

The cool raindrops hitting my skin startles me. I didn’t realize it was supposed to rain today. I look to the sky and see the dark clouds moving in. The rain starts pouring as soon as I get back into my car.

Taking one last look around, knowing this would be my last visit, I slowly pull out of the parking spot and head toward the restaurant. The rain is coming down harder, the first big storm of the year. The lighting flashing so brightly would make this a perfect day to sit at home with a glass of wine ready to watch the show.

I hear my phone buzzing in my purse. I’m sure it is Abby making sure I am on my way. I don’t dare look with the rain making it hard to see more than ten feet in front of you.

I look down at the clock when a bright flash of light blinds me. I hear what sounds like a small explosion and when my eyes are back on the road I barely have enough time to swerve to the left, barely avoiding the large tree limb falling in front of me.

I can hear the small branches scratching against the metal of my car. It sounds like a banshee screaming. When I pass the tree, I swerve back into my lane. The cement is drenched with a mixture of the rain and oils from cars making it hard to gain control. I quickly move my steering wheel to correct the tailspins.

When I have full control of my car, again I take a look in my rearview mirror to get a look at the fallen limb. It nearly fills the road, how I managed to slip through is a miracle. My heart is beating rapidly as I take deep breaths to try to calm myself. When my hands start to shake, I decide to pull over to the side of the road to shake it off.

“Holy shit that was close,” I tell myself.

With my hands still shaking, I dig my cell phone out of my purse to see who was calling. I slowly punch in the security code and see that I have three missed calls from Abby, five from Casey, two from Bryna and two missed calls from Flynn. They all left voice mails.

A nervous smile forms when I decide to start with Flynn’s message.

“Piper, where are you? Abby and Casey said you are not at home or the restaurant or answering your phone, there is a severe storm warning, we are canceling dinner. You need to call me. I’m worried about you, please call me.”

So note to future self, in order to get Flynn to talk to you after you fuck up I just need to go MIA for a short time. I didn’t mean to worry anyone, they must have been calling while I was sitting by the tree. I do not understand why everyone is so worried, it’s not like I have never survived a storm before.

I am about to dial Flynn when headlights catch my eye. They are wild and coming right at me like a freight train.

“Oh my God, no,” I scream.

W
hy the hell isn’t she answering her damn phone? I know I haven’t been the greatest friend the last few weeks, I’ve been ignoring her calls, avoiding her text messages like a pouting teenager who found out his mom went through his room. I should not have reacted the way I did, I should have allowed her to apologize and then moved on. I know she would never do anything to hurt me, we have been friends far too long and gone through too much to let this stupidity get in the way of that.

I’ve been thinking over the last few weeks as to why I am so pissed about her reading Jack’s letter. I had every intention of showing it to her one day, so should it matter she found it and was so overcome that she read it before I was ready?

Hell, before she put on the brakes we were about to cross a line we could never cross back from. Part of me wonders what would have happened if she had not stopped us. Would she have felt it was a mistake or would it have been everything I… My thoughts are interrupted by the ringing of my phone. The caller ID holds a number I do not recognize.

“Hello,” I say, answering the call.

“Hello, is this Mister Flynn Avery?”

“Yes, who is this?” I ask.

“Hello, sir. This is Peggy Williams at Hartland Community Hospital. Do you know a Piper Reynolds?” she asks.

“Yes, what’s going on?”

“Sir, Mrs. Reynolds has been involved in a motor vehicle accident.”

“Is she alright?” My heart skips a beat as the question leaves me.

“Sir, she is in critical condition. How soon can you get here?”

The phone nearly falls from my hand. How can this be happening? This cannot be happening.

“Sir, are you there?” Peggy asks.

“Yes, I am here.”

“Sir, Piper has you listed as her emergency contact and medical power of attorney. When would you be able to get here?”

“I am on my way,” I tell her.

This cannot be happening, not to Piper. She has been through so much. She doesn’t deserve this.

After calling Casey to tell her, she, of course, is in a panic. Abby, Bryna, and she have been waiting at the house for Piper to surface. I grab my keys and I’m on my way to the hospital.

The drive to the hospital is surreal. Concentrating on driving through the raging storm is the only thing keeping my thoughts from taking over. When I pull into the parking lot I don’t bother to reach for my umbrella, I run as quickly as I can to the emergency room door.