Catching Serenity (18 page)

She smiled her thanks.
“That’d be great.” Grabbing the leash from its hook, she handed it to him. “How’s Freud these days?”

Jackson
’s grin grew broader. “Still a sofa hog, but a lovable one. How much time before we eat?”

“
Well, I’m heating the soup now and then I need to make the sandwiches. Maybe ten minutes?”

“
Sure thing.” By the time Jackson returned, she’d refilled Ginseng’s water and food dishes and put them outside the door.

“
We’re ready to eat if you can call Dad to the table.” She eyed the arrangement of Vi’s Violet roses in another Waterford vase inherited from her maternal grandmother. Hopefully, her father wouldn’t turn up his nose at their lunch of lean turkey breast on whole wheat sandwiches and homemade, low-sodium vegetable soup.

Serenity smiled as she heard
Clinton insisting he was fine to walk into the kitchen on his own. As they gathered around the small table, Jackson took her hand to ask grace. Her heart sputtered when he reached for her father’s hand. To her surprise, Clinton accepted the gesture without comment or protest. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d seen him bow his head in prayer. Probably at their neighbor’s funeral, but never—
ever
—in a church. Closing her eyes, Serenity concentrated on Jackson’s prayer.

After fussing
over Clinton during the meal, he finally cut her off. “I’m not dead yet. Take it easy on me, girl. It’s not like the surgeon cut me open. I had a little medical procedure, that’s all. Charlie’s had something like it and so have half the men over fifty down at Martha’s Cup & Such on any given morning.” He glanced at Jackson and chuckled. “Not that it’s a reflection of the food at Martha’s since I hear you’re there almost every morning, Doc. Glad you’ve taken to the locals around here and vice versa.”

Serenity paused her spoon halfway to her mouth and lowered it back to her bowl.
“I didn’t know Charlie had any trouble.”

Clinton waved his hand.
“Not anything major. It was a couple of years ago. He’s fit as a fiddle now.”

“
Well, he looks good. I’m sure he wants to be around for Maya,” Serenity said. “Just like I want to keep
you
around.”

“
Glad to hear it.” Her father gave her a rare wink. When he inclined his head toward Jackson and waggled his brows, she continued eating her soup and ignored him.

T
hey enjoyed small talk and Jackson filled them in on the latest developments with the playground renovation while they ate. Her father brightened and laughed a few times. She hadn’t seen him act this relaxed and at ease with someone new in a long time.

“
Great soup,” Jackson said when he finished. “I insist on helping you with the dishes.”

“
That’ll take all of five minutes, but anything to be close to my pretty daughter, huh, Jackson?”

“
You bet. You found me out.” Jackson and her dad shared a look she couldn’t begin to comprehend, like they were members of a private, two-man boys’ club. “Nothing I’d like better.”

She had to admit, working with Jackson beside her in the kitchen was fun. Danny always plopped in front of the television and watched dumb, mindless shows instead of engaging in conversation or
showing much interest in her day.

“
Jackson, what are your hobbies?” She handed him the last plate to dry. “Assuming you have some.”

“
Sure I have hobbies,” he said. “I like to read thrillers and medical mysteries, that type of thing. I stick with Christian fiction now since the mainstream ones have too much...stuff. It really started to bother me.” Unfolding the dish towel after drying the last plate, he laughed. “Ah, the happy, dancing pears.”

The amusement in his voice made
Serenity smile. “Don’t start counting pears or you’ll be here the rest of the day.”

With her father dozing
comfortably in his bed an hour later, Serenity walked Jackson to the front door. Stepping outside, Jackson raised his face to the sky. “I think we’re going to get a storm soon. You can smell it.”

She smiled.
“I don’t know if it’s the ocean air or what, but you’re right. Very astute for a city boy.”

“
City boys know about rain,” he said. “Here’s another observation: we need a landscaper for the playground project. I was getting ready to start gathering bids, but I have it on good authority your friend Deidre’s husband has a solid reputation. Why not give him first dibs on the job?”

“
Dibs? I haven’t heard that word in ages, but somehow I think you have a plan.”

“
Always.” He turned to her. “Your dad had another great suggestion. Let’s have dinner, the four of us—Deidre and Wes, you and me. Call it a working dinner or whatever works for you. We’ll discuss landscaping ideas for the playground. Just so you know it’s not a date. Not really.”

“
Let me talk to Deidre and we’ll set something up.”

He appeared mildly surprised.
“Don’t forget.”

“
I won’t. You have my word.”

“
Sit with me in church tomorrow morning?” Jackson’s smile was enough reason to say yes.

“
Sure,” she said, “as long as Dad doesn’t need me.”

“
I already asked him, and he gave his blessing. Said he’d be fine and Deidre’s coming over and bringing lunch. Said she could stay for however long.”

“
I can’t tell you how much I appreciate all your help. I don’t know many guys who’d be so nice as to stay all night with a crotchety old man in the hospital.”

He chuckled.
“I don’t mean to sound irreverent, but he
was
asleep most of that time.”

“
He likes you.”

“
I like
him
. Listen, there’s a church picnic tomorrow, right after the service,” he said. “Want to go together?”

“
As long as my dad’s okay and Deidre can stay, I suppose it’s okay. Would it be all right if I invite my neighbor, Mrs. Marciano, to go with us?”

With a smile she felt to her toes,
Jackson tweaked her chin. “More than all right, but there’s one little problem. My car’s only a two-seater.”

“
I’ll drive separately then,” she said. “Besides, it’ll make it easier to come back and check on Dad and then go pick her up. I think she’d have fun. Mrs. Marciano spends too much time alone in her house, but from what I can see, she gets around fine. Should I bring a covered dish?”

“
Not this time. You have enough to do with your dad, and I’m sure there’ll be more than enough food.”

“
If it rains, will they cancel the picnic?” she asked, glancing up at the sky.

“
Not sure. I guess we’ll have to wait and see what happens.”

Serenity nodded
and walked him to his car parked in the driveway. She leaned back against it, her hands behind her. Jackson mirrored her actions. Thinking better of it, recalling how protective men could be about their cars, she moved away. “Sorry. I shouldn’t lean against such an expensive sports car.”

With a gentle hand on her arm, Jackson guided her back to her original position.
“Lean away. I don’t mind. Notice I’m doing it, too. But, I don’t give free leaning rights to just anyone, you know.”

“
Thanks.” The fragrance of her mother’s roses wafted to her in the warm afternoon air. “Mama’s roses. Can you smell them?”

Jackson
lifted his head and nodded. “Very nice.”

“
My mom loved them. They’re called Vi’s Violet. They’re pretty rare. I helped her plant them along the back wall of the house when I was six. They’ve come back every year since then. You can always catch their scent when the breeze blows a certain way. Of course, I can’t help but see the irony of how those rare roses come back even without Mama here to tend to them.”

Jackson appeared momentarily startled.

“Something wrong?”

He shook his head.
“No. Sorry. What kind of roses are they?”

“
Vi’s Violet. I know, I’d never heard of them either. It’s another thing that makes my mother unique. Cultivating those roses was one of her favorite things.”

Jackson
nodded, but he still looked stunned for reasons known only to him. “I imagine your father tends to them or else he hires a gardener.”

She considered his words.
“I hadn’t thought about it, but you’re probably right. Dad can be cheap when it comes to certain things, but when it comes to something of Mama’s, he doesn’t want to change anything—from the pillows arranged a certain way on the living room sofa, the bowl full of pears on the kitchen counter or the frayed chair in the family room. If it takes a gardener to keep those roses alive, you’re right. That’s exactly what Dad would do.”

“
That’s kind of sweet in its own way, don’t you think?” Jackson said.

“
I suppose.” She turned to face him directly. “The flowers in the jar in Dad’s hospital room were Vi’s Violet roses. I can’t imagine who brought them. I’ve never seen them anywhere but at the back of our house.” They’d left them on the nurse’s station.

“
Jackson, I wanted to tell you about something Dad said when I was here at the house on Thursday night.” In some ways, it felt like much longer. “At first, I was upset and not thinking clearly. But now, I think it might be pretty significant.”

“
Tell me.”

S
erenity inhaled another deep breath. “I think Mama’s alive.”

~
CHAPTER 18~

“
Dad always talks about Mama in present tense,” Serenity said. “I mean, that’s nothing new. He’s done it since she disappeared. At first, I thought it was because he’s still unbearably lonely without her and it’s his subconscious way of keeping her memory alive.”

Jackson nodded.
“Could be. It’s a common response to grief, especially in cases of missing persons.” He didn’t seem unduly shocked by her statement.
Does he share my belief Mama’s alive?

“
I was pretty horrible to him.” She dug her toe into a loose section of pavement on the driveway. Something else to have repaired.

“
You couldn’t be horrible if you tried. Please don’t tell me you think that triggered his attack.”

“
No, not really. You’re right about that. Dad brought it on himself. But I blasted Mama, and in his eyes, that’s like the cardinal sin. I asked him why he thought she’d left and then accused her of being selfish and leaving when I needed her most.”

“
What was his response?”

“
He said the sadness was too much handle.” She ran a hand over her brow and smoothed long strands of her hair away from her face. “I don’t know. Something like that. I was impatient and didn’t want to accept that answer. It wasn’t good enough, I guess. Not that he can give me one I’ll accept.” She shrugged and darted a helpless glance at him. “I asked him if he thought she was alive, but he said he didn’t know what to think.”

“
Then what makes you think your mom’s alive?”

“
I told him how my faith in Christ helped me get through the last few years. I half-expected him to make a joke about faith or organized ‘religion’ like he’s done in the past. I remember him saying Christianity is something for the weak to hang onto when they can’t handle their own lives. Ever since I came back to Croisette Shores, though, he’s been remarkably...non-combative.”

Serenity
raised her eyes to Jackson’s. “This is the thing: even though Mama was raised in a church, I can count on one hand the number of times I ever heard her mention God when I was growing up. Before I left the house, Dad made a comment about how I sounded like Mama in always talking about God.”

A new light came into
Jackson’s eyes. “I’d say that’s a pretty good indicator he knows something all right. What’s your heart telling you?”

“
That she’s alive. And...”

“
And...what?”

She swallowed hard.
“Maybe Dad
knows
she’s alive. It makes me absolutely furious to think he might be holding back on me. And sad. And overjoyed to think she might really be out there. She
rejected
us. Do you know how that feels?”

“
Yes, I do,” he said, his voice quiet. “Not in the same way, of course, but pushed out of someone’s life? Yeah, I’ve been there. When you get to be my age, it’s inevitable someone along the way’s stomped on your heart.”

“
I’m sorry. How selfish you must think me.” She glanced up at him. “If somebody stomped on your heart, they were sadly misguided.” The tears she’d tried to hold back stung her eyes. “I wonder why—if Mama
is
alive—where is she and why won’t she come home again?”

When she collapsed against him, Jackson
stroked one hand over her hair and whispered words of comfort. What he said, she didn’t know. He was there, and that’s all she needed. “I’m sorry,” she sobbed against his shoulder. “I don’t know what to think, how to feel, anything right now.” Gazing up at him, she bit back another sob. “I’m tired of crying but it seems all I’m capable of doing. Tell me what I’m supposed to feel, what I’m supposed to do, Jackson.”

“
I wish I could, but I promise we’ll find your answers. We’ll find your mother.”

Pulling away, Serenity wiped
a hand across her damp cheek. “Should I confront Dad? Demand answers?”

“
Not yet. If he
does
know something, it could be he’s afraid to tell you. Could be he’s afraid of how you’ll react. On the other hand, it’s possible he ‘slipped’ on purpose, hoping you’d pick up on it.”

“
Do
you
think she’s still alive? Tell me your honest opinion, professional or not. Please.” Bunching his T-shirt in both hands, Serenity felt the steady vibration of Jackson’s heartbeat beneath her hands. Life-affirming and strong. The connection between them was intense and she couldn’t let go of him. She looked into his eyes, seeking answers she knew he couldn’t give but reassurance he
could
give. “You ‘read’ people all the time, so tell me what you believe. I need to know.”

“
Yes, baby, I think your mother is alive.”

Releasing her hold on him,
Serenity smoothed her hand over the front of his shirt. “You’ll need to change. Sorry I messed you up.” She sniffled and turned the other way. “
I’m
kind of messed up, but at least you still have a good reputation in this town.”

“
No, Serenity, you’re not messed up. If you are, then you’re the best messed up person I know.” Shaking his head, he chuckled. “That didn’t come out right, but believe me, you have it more together than most people I know. There’s a lot of dysfunction in the world, and from people who’ve been through a whole lot less than you.” He tipped her chin and gazed into her eyes. “I think you’re one of the strongest people—man or woman—I know. You’ve also got the love of the Lord in your heart, and, although I didn’t know you before, I sense you’re even stronger now.”

This man sensed so much
it scared her. In a weird way, it also comforted her. The deep affection in his eyes awakened parts of her she thought had died right along with Danny. “I think the best thing to do is to see if your dad says anything else that might clue us in that your mom might be alive. Even more important, clues that he might be in touch with her.”

She frowned.
“It’ll be hard, but I’ll try. How can someone disappear into thin air?” With a snap of her fingers, she gave him a quizzical look. “Poof! No trace of a life. Just…gone.”

“
Have you or your dad tried to find her, either on your own or hired anyone?”

“
I haven’t, no, but Dad hired a private detective and kept him on retainer for a couple of years. Nothing ever turned up, obviously. Considering the guy’s currently in jail for fraud, I’m wondering if he ever tried. Probably took the money and made a couple of dead-end phone calls. I’ve done a little research on the Internet, but I haven’t been able to find anything and haven’t had the money to do more.” Serenity wiped under her eyes with the back of her hand, absorbing the last of her tears. “If Mama’s alive, she either doesn’t want to be found, or—”

“
If you want, I can make a few phone calls, but I don’t want to overstep my boundaries.”

She glanced up in surprise.
“Do you know a private detective?”

“
I’ve hired one in the past. My brother Kyle is a lawyer and has access to a program that tracks down people. It might be the place to start. I guarantee they could at least find your mom’s last known address and then we can go from there.”

“
What if it’s Croisette Shores?”

“
Is that what you’re most afraid of?”

She held
his gaze. “Maybe. I don’t know.”

“
I won’t do anything until you say the word, but as soon as you do, I’ll make some calls.”

“
Okay. Thanks. I appreciate your willingness to help me.” Reaching for his hand, she ran her thumb back and forth across it. “If you’re hoping to be my knight on the big white horse, riding in to save me, there’s really no need.”

“
I’d like to pray with you, Serenity.”

She nodded, unable to speak. An unexpected warmth filled her, similar to what she experienced the night she
’d invited Jesus into her life. That moment changed her life. This moment was changing her
heart
, especially with this wonderful man beside her. Bowing her head, Serenity focused on Jackson’s words and liked the feel of his hand, warm and protective, around hers.

“
Father God,
I ask You to give Serenity the kind of comfort only You can and that peace that passes all understanding, Let it fill her with a renewed sense of who You are. Draw her close so she might rediscover how much You love her and have always loved her. If it’s in Your will, please help her find the answers about the past and her mother so she can move forward. And if I may help her, please guide me as Your servant. I ask these things in the precious name of Your Son, Jesus. Amen.
”

Jackson waited a few moments, not squeezing her hand, not nudging her to say anything. But the words wouldn
’t come. At some point during his prayer, she’d leaned against his shoulder and he moved his arm to circle her shoulders.

“
The words are stuck somewhere inside me,” she whispered.
Wow. I’m a failure at saying a simple prayer.

“
It’s okay,” he whispered back. “I’d rather you not say anything than say something because you think it’s what I want or expect. It’ll come in time, but it needs to come from the deepest part of you. God understands. Some people jump onto the Christianity bandwagon with feet first but then they falter after a while and revert back to their old ways. Slow and steady is always the best way to go, in a lot of things in life.”

Serenity sensed Jackson also meant in terms of their growing relationship, and again, it gave her comfort. If he pushed her too far, too fast, he knew she
’d run away emotionally. By being her friend and confidant, Jackson was working his way into her heart. He’d proven himself an incredibly compassionate and loyal friend. Snuggling further into the curve of his arm, she released a deep sigh. It seemed as natural as breathing. They fit together so well. Much more than she ever had with Danny.
Whoa.

“
Jackson? Go ahead and ask your brother to see if he can find out anything.”

“
I’ll make the call tonight.”

“
If Mama’s alive,” she whispered against his shirt, closing her eyes, “I have an idea who might have sent that note to me.”

“
Your mother?”

She nodded.
“Exactly.”