Champagne Kisses (27 page)

I could worry about retrieving them after several gorgeous glasses of champers.

I might have been feeling bulletproof, but I wasn’t quite cocky enough to do a Patricia the stripper on it, so as Michael started to open the belt on his jeans, I quickly threw my coat back into the suite, away from the possibility of getting wet, and made a bolt for the Jacuzzi.

I had already dipped myself up to my suspender belt when Michael realized what I was doing, so he gave me one of his naughty looks, wagged his finger at me and said, ‘You may run, Miss Valentine, but you can’t hide.’

As Lucy poured me a glass of champagne, she gave me a devilish wink. She looked set for boldness.

‘He’s very organized, your boy,’ she said with a broad smile.

‘Scarily so,’ I agreed.

‘Bottoms up?’ she smirked, raising her glass for a toast.

‘I hope you mean that literally,’ said Michael as he brushed past Lucy, his penis dangling with a semi, and eased himself into the water between the two of us. ‘Ahhh, now isn’t this cosy? I’ve two of the hottest girls in Dublin, wet and wild.’

‘So are you planning any other devious surprises?’ I prayed for the answer to be no.

‘What other surprises could there possibly be?’ he asked in retaliation, rubbing his right hand across my thigh.

‘Ach, anything is possible with you,’ I slurred. Maybe it was his touch, the Jacuzzi, the champagne – then again, how could I forget about my first dalliance with coke? – but the combination of all four had started to ignite a craziness in me.

I was now as horny as hell, and undid my bra playfully, thinking I was Dita Von Teese, and flung it across the decking. It was followed by my stockings, which I foolishly ripped for dramatic effect, my suspender belt and then my thin black thong. Both Michael and Lucy cheered as I removed each item. I felt centre stage.

‘Now we can get the party started,’ whooped Michael as he splashed the water to make us scream again. ‘That’s what I love to hear,’ he responded. ‘I want to make you holler – but first I want to see you girls kiss again.’

‘Do you like to see me kiss girls?’ asked Lucy.

‘Damn sure,’ said Michael with a smirk.

‘Hang on,’ I interrupted, ‘since when is it about what Michael likes to see you do?’

‘Oh shush now, don’t get all paranoid on me. Tonight is all about you, Eva. Isn’t it, Lucy?’

I darted a look at Lucy and she just stared back at me, in fact almost through me. There was a coldness
from
her that I hadn’t seen before. Instantly I felt a wave of panic flood over me. I wanted out. I wanted to be as far away from here as possible.

So I pushed across the pair of them and announced, ‘I’m going.’

At once Michael put his hand on my shoulder and said, ‘Stop right there, you’re going nowhere.’

But I was completely freaked and I needed to get out. As I struggled to break loose of Michael’s grip, Lucy growled, ‘Just let her go. Let her go home and play with her dollies, I’m not in the mood for amateur night.’

‘What the fuck does that mean?’ My anxiety quickly flipped to anger.

‘Nothing,’ snapped Lucy, taking a large mouthful of champagne. ‘I just know you’re out of your depth here, so it’s probably best if you go now.’

‘What’s that supposed to mean?’ I demanded again.

‘Well, I’d made a bet with Michael here earlier that you wouldn’t be brave enough to take us on in the Jacuzzi. Michael seemed to think you’d be woman enough for the job, but I wasn’t convinced. So it looks like I’ve won the bet.’

‘You’ve made a bet about me?’ I turned to Michael for clarification but he just shrugged his shoulders and continued to drink his champagne.

What should I do? My head was spinning. I was so frustrated. I wanted to walk out and take a stand, but I also wanted to prove myself. I
was
woman enough
for
this. I could be part of a threesome, yeah, I was going to show them just how impressive a lover I could be.

‘Well fuck you two!’ I screamed, reaching for the bottle to top up my glass. ‘I want champagne kisses, so who’s going to give them to me?’

Boisterously I took a mouthful of champagne and put my glass back down at the side of the Jacuzzi. Then automatically I leaned in to kiss Lucy. In my hazy state I thought: well, I’ll show her.

In the background I heard Michael starting to get really aroused, but this kiss was all about Lucy and me. They weren’t going to push me out of the fun. I was all about the fun!

As we pressed lips I could feel the bite of the bubbles from the champagne, and as she opened her mouth they trickled out of my mouth and into hers. For the first time all evening I felt I was the one in control. Michael might not have considered me the one for him, just one of the two for him, but I wasn’t going to let my insecurities get the better of me. I would leave them both wanting more of Eva.

My Lucy moment was short-lived. Not content with being a voyeur, Michael snuggled his head between us just as our tongues began to swirl. But it didn’t throw us, and the three of us enthusiastically picked up kissing each other, flicking tongues, biting lips and smacking naked bodies.

After all the messing about, this was a fantasy made real. And a lifelong memory not fit for the
grandkids
. I felt something fall on my head, and when I looked up I saw Michael pouring the champagne over us.

Like puppies Lucy and I scrambled to swallow the sweet nectar, our bare breasts brushing off each other in an effort to do so. Between the water and the hands, the breasts and the champagne, I almost lost sense of who was who. I was touching someone’s body, but I didn’t know whose it was.

And who owned the hands that were touching me? The intensity of the moment was almost unbearable. This was a pleasure overload.

Hands, breasts, tongues, bums – the Jacuzzi was almost swirling out of control … almost … almost … Shit. Was that a finger or a toe up my ass?

I woke to the sound of traffic.

I was stiff with the cold, yet my body was painful for reasons unknown to me.

When I cracked my eyes open I realized I was lying on a bench on the side of the road.

What the fuck?

I didn’t move for a time as I tried to get my bearings. But I had to pull myself up to try and ascertain my full whereabouts.

As I sat up I saw blood. There was dried blood on my hands, across my legs and splattered across my coat.

I looked like I had been caught up in some teen slasher movie.

Looking around, I saw I was on St Stephen’s Green. It was obviously still early morning as there weren’t many cars around, but I was unsure how long I’d been asleep on the bench.

How did I get here?

Where was I last night?

Fuck, I was at the Hartley with Michael … Oh, my God, and Lucy …

Where were they now?

And what’s with all the blood?

I repositioned my bum on the seat and got shooting pains up my back and stabbing pains across my temples.

Ouch!

Jesus, how did I get here? I gotta think …

As I stared down at my bare, bloodied legs, straining for inspiration, I got a flashback of the previous night’s events.

I remember the Jacuzzi … There was champagne … Lucy was giving Michael a blowjob … And then … Ehhhh … Somebody threw a bottle.

Oh, my God, that’s it. The three of us were in the Jacuzzi when some woman came out on to the balcony and flung a Heineken bottle at us which smashed a couple of glasses.

She was ranting, ‘You fucking bastard, get those bitches out of here
now
!’

But how did I end up on a park bench on St Stephen’s Green? And who was that madwoman?

Ohmigod, now I remember. She said she was
Michael’s
fiancée, in between screams that she’d cut his balls off.

My last memory was of her; she was standing over us shaking with the anger, and screaming, ‘
Out now!
’ I then remember crawling on to the broken glass trying to clamber out of her way.

Considering the state I was in I thought it best if I got myself home before the Gardaí picked me up for soliciting, or some junkie grabbed me for his plaything.

I opened my clutch handbag fearful of what, if anything, I would find. Thankfully I could see keys, a couple of € 20 notes and my mobile.

So with my body aching like it had just run a marathon, my head pounding like I’d been hit over the head with a baseball bat, and the appearance of a hooker who’d brought her pimp home no money, I struggled towards the taxi rank down the road.

I was blessed that it was full, and that I had slipped into the first car before the driver even realized.

Although I kept our chat to a minimum he was giving me strange looks in his rearview mirror.

He finally worked up to asking ‘Good night, luv?’ in a sarcastic tone, to which I was able to reply, ‘Just up here to the left, thanks.’

As I looked out the window trying to steady my nerves, I was hit with another flashback.

It was of Michael and Lucy whispering and laughing in the Jacuzzi. They then started telling me I wasn’t brave enough to go all the way with Lucy.

Ohmigod, what had I done?

Although the journey only cost € 8.50, I threw the taximan a € 20 and told him to keep the change. I couldn’t bear him scrutinizing me as he dragged out counting my change.

It was only when I got in the lift and saw myself in the mirrors that I discovered why he’d been giving me such strange looks.

Although the blood on my coat was out of his radar – I’d since worked out that it came from cuts on my left arm and left leg – I had massive black mascara streaks running down my face.

I was mortified. I truly looked a wreck. I even had an imprint of the bench across my face. The best thing I could do was jump into the shower, wash away the evidence and hit the hay. Sleep would be my friend. The longer I stayed awake, the more time I had to think about what I might have done.

But the second I turned the key in the latch I could hear screaming.

A nervous sounding Maddie cried, ‘Eva, is that you?’

‘Coming,’ I answered, running in to her.

I found her on the side of her bed doubled over in pain.

When I knelt down beside her she looked up and screamed again. ‘Jesus, what’s up with you?’

I tried to distract her by asking, ‘Listen, what’s up with
you
?’ But my appearance proved too intriguing.

‘I’m having a baby, Sherlock. What the hell have you been at? Just come from a murder?’

She would have most likely kept barking at me only a contraction came along and shut her up. As she squealed I could nearly feel her pain from the expressions on her face.

She was squeezing the life out of my hands when Parker strolled into the room explaining, ‘The taxi is going to be five minutes … Oh, dear God, did I miss the delivery?’

‘Very funny, Parker, you’re the only baby here so far …’ My head was now having sympathy contractions with Maddie.

‘OK, there’s no time for cattiness, this fabulous beast here is about to have a baby. The taxi will be here any minute, so I suggest if you want to join Maddie on her journey into motherhood you get into the shower and fix yourself pronto.’

Without thinking, ‘I’m wrecked’ accidentally fell out of my mouth.

‘
You’re wrecked?
’ Maddie screamed, then doubled over in pain again. ‘I’m the one about to push a fuckin’ basketball out of my fanny!’

‘Yeah, sorry, I wasn’t thinking.’ My apology was lame and clearly not good enough for Maddie.

‘Don’t you dare start complaining, I’ve been having contractions since midnight. That’s six and a half hours, and where the fuck have you been? You’re supposed to be my birthing partner.’

‘I think you better hop in the shower,’ whispered
Parker,
opting not to be facetious for once.

‘Just hold tight,’ I said, walking out the door. ‘I’ll be two minutes.’

Who was I kidding? I felt like death. How was I going to survive this morning?

I was in a lot of pain but Maddie needed me. This morning had to be all about her and her baby. I had to swallow some painkillers quick and try and blot out my own issues.

I was just pulling on some comfies when I heard the buzzer from downstairs.

‘Taxi for Maddie,’ said a voice.

‘She’ll be right down,’ explained Parker. ‘Girls, shake a leg.’

Instantly I got another flashback from the night before: Lucy sitting up out of the Jacuzzi with her legs wrapped around my shoulders.

Oh, dear God … Please say I didn’t …?

Could I have really gone down on Lucy?

I don’t remember, but maybe … No, I couldn’t have.

I’m just a social lesbian, one who occasionally kisses girls at the weekend. Yes, I can be a lesbian from the waist up, but I’m strictly hetero from the waist down.

That’s it, I don’t care how uncool it makes me, I am never doing coke again, no matter who bullies me into it. Parker and Maddie will freak when they hear what I’ve been doing.

‘EVA!’ Parker was screaming from the hall, ‘EVA! Come on, Maddie’s about to drop any second.’

‘OK, I’m coming now.’

Right, it was time to concentrate. I’d just have to focus on the fanny I’d be looking at today, and forget about the fanny I can picture from last night.

‘What can you see?’

‘Nothing, I don’t want to look.’

It was 2.42p.m. and Maddie was ten centimetres dilated and preparing herself to push.

‘Eva pleeeeeease …’ Maddie’s rant was delayed by yet another contraction.

‘Eh, there’s nothing to tell yet, except that you’re exceptionally well trimmed.’

This repetitive banter could have gone on for ever, but we were distracted by the entrance of the midwife Mary, whom we’d met when we were first admitted to Holles Street.

‘Ladies,’ she announced in a loud and stern voice. ‘Listen up. A baby is about to be born, so we all need to concentrate.’

By now Maddie – and myself – had become extremely weak from the length of the process, and Mary’s presence seemed to trigger tears in both of us.

‘I can’t do this,’ whined Maddie.

‘Of course you can, my love,’ said Mary, holding Maddie’s hand and stroking her hair, ‘but you’ve got to work with me. Right then, let’s do this.’