Chance of the Heart (4 page)

Chance gripped the steering wheel of his truck tighter as he passed the Hope Springs city limits sign. All of the anxiety was flooding back and all he could see were images of his clothes on Bradley’s floor, Bradley’s hands in his hair. The feeling of letting go.

God he felt like a coward though, for the first time in his life. He’d slipped out of Bradley’s bed, gotten dressed in the hallway, and hightailed it out of there like his ass was on fire. Bradley was an old friend and even if it’d been a one night thing, an experiment with crazy implications, Bradley probably deserved better than that. But Chance couldn’t do morning kisses and get enticed into doing those things again. Everything about last night had been the opposite of how he was raised. You listened to your parents, you finished school, you worked your family spread and you made an honest woman of the girl who’d been there for you forever. Those things kept you warm and safe at night.

But not for the first time over the last year or so, he was asking himself ‘is that enough?’ A question he’d never asked aloud or been asked. A question he’d wondered if his friends asked themselves.

David seemed to think he should want more sex, his brother thought he should want his own place… But never more than this town. They’d eventually gone down the same paths as their parents, the path laid out in front of Chance now.

They never had a Bradley Heart.
His body still hummed from its night of unmatched pleasure. His ass hurt, and that made him feel both dirty and turned on. Which would not do. He was pulling his truck into the Red River and the last thing he needed was to start sporting wood.

When he pulled his truck into the garage beneath his loft, he sighed in annoyance to see David’s truck was also there. He girded his loins, gathered his phone and wallet from the center console and made his way out of the truck and garage. Where he found his friend sitting on the stairs to his apartment, drinking coffee and smirking.

Damn.
“What’re you doing here?” He tried for nonchalance. If the way David’s smirk became more pronounced was any indication, he’d failed.

“Well, I’d left my tool box here. Thought I’d grab ‘em, do some work on the old bike.” The old bike was a hopeless old Harley that David had been tinkering with for the better part of a decade. Chance figured it was more a way to get alone time than anything, since David had started working on it right around the time he’d gotten together with Jeri the first time. They’d been the kind of couple that was like most others in their town, destined to graduate and marry. The same kind of couple everyone assumed Chance and Caitlin were.
Assumed?
Probably were. And he couldn’t even think about that right now.

“So you thought you’d help yourself to my coffee?” Chance asked, still attempting to deflect.

“This is your mom’s. You think I’d just go through your place all willy-nilly while you’re out?”

“Yes,” Chance said drily as he started ascending the stairs, passing Caleb whose “Yeah… probably…” was enough to grate his nerves right now. How must it have been for Bradley to have his own place where everyone you knew couldn’t just walk in, because even if you locked the door your mama would give out the key? He’d thought maybe since he paid for it all, well over forty grand by the time he finished, maybe they’d respect it was his space. But such was ranch life. They knew not to drop in at night or if Caitlin was there, so that was something. He supposed his parents always had people coming in and out of the main house without an invitation, too.

He wasn’t sure why he’d compared his situation to Bradley’s. But aside from the sex, he’d noticed Bradley had also had an enviable apartment, privacy and didn’t have his family is his face.

Chance suddenly felt ungrateful, though. He
did
have his family. That was more than a lot of people could say. Maybe he still had Caitlin, his health, and his ranch. He also had Heather’s catering company. Life was good. It was enough.

“Brother, I do believe you got laid last night,” David’s voice rang out gleefully behind him. He’d almost forgotten his friend was there in the first place. He’d just walked straight into his loft and started changing clothes, completely distracted.

He glanced at his friend. “Why on earth do you think that?” He tried not to sound incredibly guilty.

“Well,” David started, placing his mug on the kitchen counter. Since the whole place was an open floor plan, he could see David clearly from his sleeping area which was up one more flight of stairs. “You’re all doing the walk of shame with your hair stickin’ up and wearing wrinkled goin’ out clothes at eight in the morning.”

“Aren’t you observant,” Chance grumbled.

“Enough to see them hickeys on your chest.” Chance glanced down and saw he did in fact have two rather well pronounced marks just below his collarbone. He pulled a T-shirt on and headed back downstairs. He needed coffee. Now.

David watched him the whole time he got the coffee pot ready, which was wearing on his last nerve. Finally he turned and pinned his friend with his best glare. This one David knew meant to back the fuck off.

“Okay, buddy. Okay. It’s just weird. I guess I didn’t think you’d follow through. I mean, she’s your girl. Has been forever.”

He looked at David incredulously. “
You
? Of all people. The one who would have pimped me out? You’re surprised.”

“Aw, don’t be like that. Mostly I’m just all talk, though.” Which Chance did know. For all that David had been a bit of a player in high school, he’d settled in with Jeri before he could turn into a total man-whore. And Chance wondered about his stories of dating all those girls. He sure seem to be pretty scandalized now for someone who’d had ‘so much experience’.

“The whole point is to not ask questions either way.” He wished that’d work, though he knew better. Technically David would be wrong with any assumptions he made. Chance hadn’t been with another
woman
. But he sure couldn’t tell David the truth.

“You
are
in a mood, Becket. What’s up your ass?”

Oh you have no idea.
That thought made him squirm a bit. “I just don’t want to talk about it.”

David assessed him carefully. “I know you, boss man. You look guilty like you did first time you got with Caitlin.” And he
had
felt guilty after their first time. Guilty and dirty and like he’d done something wrong. “I’m just trying to figure out if you feel guilty ‘cus you did it, guilty ‘cus you liked it, or guilty ‘cus you’re sweet on the new girl.”

His friend was gazing steadily at him as Chance struggled to breathe for a moment. Then he snorted. “Since when did we start talkin’ about feelings?”

David laughed then mock shuddered. “You’re right. I think I’ve been spending too much time watching Lifetime movies with my wife.”

Chance laughed and put on his best fake-it-til-you-make-it smile, patting his friend on the shoulder. “Walk it off, Singleton.” David shook his head and complained mumbled gripes about hours of Danielle Steel movies. Chance didn’t feel too awfully light-hearted about all this though.

Hadn’t his friend just hit the nail on the head? Chance did feel guilty. But not for the things David had said. He felt guilty because he
didn’t
feel guilty. And he had no fucking clue what that meant.

Bradley woke the next morning, shock of all shocks, to an empty bed. He groaned and rolled over to check the time. It was well after nine a.m. That was sleeping late for him. He’d never quite shaken ranch hours, even in college. That’s how he’d kept in shape. Everyone else was still sleeping in and he was up with the rooster hitting the gym before the mobs.

The gym sounded like a good idea about then. For someone who’d just gotten laid, and laid good, he felt restless and wound tight. He wasn’t sure why he thought Chance would still be there that morning. Maybe it’d been the way they woke up cuddling earlier and it’d turned into a hell of a second round. Maybe because it was Chance and that spark had always been there.

You’re a fool, that’s why.
Chance may have been a willing bottom, but everything had screamed closet case. From the way Chance hid at the bar, to the fact he’d come to Abernathy to drink when there was a closer gay bar than Bar None to their hometown.

Bradley scowled at himself in the mirror as he brushed his teeth. He needed to just get over this. That’s the Bradley Heart way. When you keep a good piece of ass around, they cheat or get bored. And he wouldn’t even consider playing with a closet case again. He still couldn’t believe he’d fucked with a virgin. That was
definitely
too complicated for him.

He’d wanted a good fuck, and he got one. The best. Damn had it been… special. He’d just wished he’d gotten to go that extra mile. Chance had been one of the most willing bottoms he’d been with and he bet they could have played well together. It’s like their bodies had just worked in synch. If Chance had never had a hand taken to that backside, Bradley bet he’d be able to show the man how good it could be. From the moment they’d laid eyes on one another there’d always been that thing, but last night it’d been intensified and… Bradley finished in the bathroom, trying to distract himself from those thoughts because his cock was already plumping up again in his boxers.

As he sat watching coffee brew in the pot, trying to keep his mind off any and all thoughts of Chance Becket and his tight ass, his phone rang. Seeing his sister’s name on the display he sighed. This would definitely be the distraction he’d wanted.

“Hey, Heather,” he said after he’d accepted the call.

“Bradley! Happy Saturday, sweets.”

“Is it?” he asked. She was a morning person. He hated her for it.

“Oh, really? You’re just waking?” Which of course was a surprise, because she knew just like anyone who knew him that he’d usually have been up three hours by now.

“Late night,” he said, noncommittally.

“Mmhmm,” she hummed to herself. It had that same tone to it that it’d had when they were kids and it was
I know what you did and I’m telling mom
. Only now mom was long dead and she just got her rocks off teasing her little brother.

“What can I do you for?” he asked. Which wasn’t really a fair question since she called every Saturday morning like clockwork. But he was not in the best of moods, having just got laid off and his one-nighter couldn’t even stick around for one more round of hand jobs.