Change of Harte (Harte, #2) (Harte Series) (12 page)

Chapter 23

Eva settled her head against Julian’s chest, scribbling messy shapes against his skin with the tip of her finger. ‘You still hungry?’

He sighed comfortably. ‘No. You?’

Eva shook her head. ‘I could use coffee, though.’

‘I’m good, thanks.’

‘Something stronger, maybe?’

‘Evangeline. I’m not hungry or thirsty.’

Julian slid out from under her and walked back to the sitting room. Eva quickly pulled on an old t-shirt and a pair of leggings. His trousers were back on and he was gathering up the rest of his clothes by the time she walked in after him. She’d known what was coming, she’d know from how tightly he held her. Like someone whose heart was breaking right then. She recognised that feeling because it was exactly how she held him their last night together in Dublin.

‘You’re leaving me, aren’t you?’

Julian didn’t look at her. He buttoned his shirt with his back to her. ‘Yes.’

‘It’s okay,’ Eva lied. ‘I mean, I’m okay. You can’t break the same thing twice. My heart is still in pieces from the last time.’

‘You’re stronger than you know.’ Julian turned around.

Eva walked away from him and sat on the couch. ‘You don’t have to do that, Julian. I understand the rules now. I belong to you, but you never belonged to me.’

‘We make our own rules, Evangeline. You don’t belong to anyone. Least of all me.’

‘I’m okay with you thinking I’m broken, but please don’t think I’m stupid, too. I’m not. I know this…’ Eva looked around her small apartment and paused with a resigned sigh. ‘All this—my job, this apartment, my life here…I know it’s all you.’

Julian folded his jacket over his arm and sat beside her on the sofa. ‘How long have you known?’

Eva tossed her head to one side. ‘Since about two days after I started at HTK. Harte, Thompson, Kent. It’s not that hard to figure out. Anyway, Pam can’t keep a secret to save her life. She wanted to know if we were a couple. I think she has a thing for you.’

Julian smiled.

‘I don’t know whether to thank you or hit you.’

Julian threw his eye back toward the bedroom. ‘You thanked me nicely already.’

Eva snorted. ‘I could have managed on my own. You didn’t have to interfere.’

‘Really? So, how often have you been to visit your mother since you got back here?’

‘That’s none of your business.’

‘I never said it was, but you’ve just answered my question. Zero times is not managing, Eva. It’s hiding.’

‘Fuck you, Julian.’ Eva stood up and began to tidy the mess of spilt wine from earlier.

‘Once was enough, thank you. I’m still a little tired.’ Julian smirked.

Eva wanted to slap him straight across the face. But he was painfully right, as always. That was the most irritating part.

‘I asked Mr. Thompson to give you a job because I’d sent you here. I needed to know that you were doing okay. It was purely to ease my conscience. It wasn’t a personal favour. If you saw it that way, you were wrong.’

Eva swallowed hard. ‘Pam said…’

‘Pam lied,’ Julian interrupted. ‘She also said I fucked her ten ways sideways three Christmases ago. But she’d been ridden more times than a roller coaster at Disneyland. I wouldn’t touch her.’

‘You’re lying,’ Eva hissed.
Please let him be lying.

‘
I don’t lie, Miss Andrews. It’s a disgusting habit.’
             

Eva threw the glass she’d just picked up out of her hand. It hit the wall, shattering instantly, making her jump. ‘God, Julian, just stop it. You’re lying to me now. You’ve lied to me so many times. Over and over, deeper and deeper into this bullshit game of yours. I didn’t want to play. I told you. But you kept up this shit. It was never a game to me, and I think you know that. You used it as an excuse to justify that fucking with my head was okay. Well, it wasn’t okay. It was never fucking okay. And now you’re back to doing it all over again.’

Julian stood behind her and shook the second glass free from her other hand and it hit the carpet barely making a sound. He spun her around to face him and cupped her face in his hands, tilting her head back to meet his stare. ‘You’re wrong. I have never, ever lied to you.’

Tears streamed down Eva’s cheeks. It had been a while since she cried, but Julian was like a switch for her emotions. ‘The game. Mr. Doe. That was all a lie.’

‘No, that was a game. You had a choice whether or not to play. You chose to play. We’ve been over this.’

‘You’re twisting things.’

‘Have I twisted things in the past? Yes. Have I ever lied to you? No.’

‘It’s the same thing. All those women you slept with before me. And after me.’

‘I like sex. I like fucking a woman so hard she loses her goddamn mind around my cock. But that doesn’t make me a fucking liar.’

Eva knew she’d pissed him off. But the damage was done. He was walking out on her anyway. It might even be easier this way. She wasn’t backing down this time.

‘So, what? You’re going back to Dublin to play some more?’

‘I’m going back to Dublin. I never said anything about playing. You thought of that all on your own, Evangeline.’

Eva’s whole face pinched. Now
that
sounded like a lie. She reminded herself that this was what he did best, get inside her head and fuck with her mind. This conversation had to end.

‘Do you really want to know what the game was about, Evangeline?’

‘Sex, right?’

‘Yes, sex. And power and pleasure and mind-blowing orgasms.’ But it was about you, too. I wanted you to know what it was like to lose everything. I wanted to break you.’

Julian closed his eyes and exhaled deeply, for just a second. ‘Sounds so fucking stupid saying that out loud. Feels wrong even just admitting it, but I did. I wanted it, Evangeline. Like somehow it would make me feel better. That’s the most stupid thing of all, isn’t it? How could breaking you make me feel better?

‘I’d already lost everything. I was already broken. And then I lost you.’

‘I know. I know that now.’

‘You knew it, but you still kept playing. What the fuck? Why? I don’t understand?’

‘I haven’t been playing for a long time, Evangeline.’

‘Bullshit. What’s all this then?’ Eva spun around, a full 360 degrees, throwing her arms angrily in the air. ‘You sent me back to this. Fucking this, Julian. I’m still a pawn in your weird little game. Well, congratulations. You finally fucking did it; you’ve broken me beyond repair. Happy?’

Julian stepped back and shook his head. ‘You can’t break something that’s already broken. You can only shatter it more.’

He was calm. His voice was soft, and he kept a slight distance. She wanted emotion, and she wanted a reaction. She needed him to as close to falling to pieces as she was. But not Julian…
never fucking Julian
. Christ, he was impossible.

‘Okay, fine. If that’s the spin you want to put on this, then whatever. Congratulations on ruining me even more,’ Eva snapped, frustration outweighing tears.

She looked into his eyes. She didn’t want to, but she couldn’t help it. Her words were angry and harsh, but inside, her heart was pleading with her to hear him out.

‘I wasn’t finished,’ Julian snapped, grabbing her wrist and pulling her back into him. It was the first sign of emotion from him and Eva relished it.
It meant it was getting to him. It meant he gave a shit.

‘You can’t fix something without all the pieces. I needed all the pieces of you, Evangeline. Do you understand?’

Eva wasn’t even aware that she was holding her breath. She’d waited so long for this honesty from him. But it hurt to hear. It hurt in a way she wasn’t prepared for, like someone was thumping their fists against her chest, pounding all the air out of her. She wanted to hear it; she wanted him to confess. But she just wanted it to hurt less—a lot less. She couldn’t react, she couldn’t scream and shout and admit her frustration. She wouldn’t be a hypocrite. She’d pushed him to be honest. She couldn’t throw a tantrum as soon as he gave her the very thing she asked for. She ran her index finger over and back across her bottom lip, processing. Taking in every single word. Finally, she replied.

‘That’s pretty goddamn arrogant, Julian. I’m not yours. Not yours to break or repair. You can’t just fuck with people like that.’

‘Yes, it is arrogant. I know that. But that’s who I am. I go in all guns blazing. You know that by now.’

‘And what’s this then? What are your guns doing now?’

‘No guns now, Evangeline. No guns, I promise.’

Julian was shaking his head. She believed him. She hated him and loved him all at the same time. But it wasn’t confusing. She knew exactly why she felt both. She just had to work out which feeling was stronger.

‘Get that coffee, Evangeline. There’s something you deserve to know.’

Chapter 24

Julian could hear the water running in the kitchen as Eva made coffee. He sat waiting in the sitting room. The apartment was small and the walls were pretty flimsy.
We must have given the neighbours plenty to listen to
, Julian thought replaying their bedroom scene in his mind briefly.

He spun his phone around in his hand. He’d hit call three times already and hung up. But the fourth time, he doubled checked Eva was still in the kitchen and he let it ring.

‘Hey, stranger. Good to hear from you. I was beginning to worry.’

‘I fucked up, Mia. I ran out of time. He’s gone.’

Julian heard Mia swallow hard.

‘Did you find Melissa?’

‘Yeah. She’s asleep back at the house.’

‘Where are you? Are you safe?’

‘I’m okay. I’m in Eva’s.’

‘Julian.’ Mia sang his name with an air of disapproval.

‘I know. I know. I just have to tell her.’

‘Are you sure that’s a good idea?’

‘Yes.’

‘Oh, Julian.’

‘I’ve got to go, I can hear her coming.’

‘Jesus, I didn’t realise the time. I’m heading in to work. It must be the middle of the night there.’

‘Yeah, it’s late.’

‘Get some sleep, Julian. Just please don’t do anything before you sleep on it. Promise me?’

‘I have to go.’ Julian hung up.

The noise of water dripping through the coffee machine was a pleasant distraction. So much so that Julian almost missed his phone ringing. It was a New York area code. No one in the office would try to reach him at this hour and the hospital number was saved in his contacts. He had a disturbing inkling this wasn’t a personal call.

‘Hello.’

‘Mr. Harte,’ a Latino voice accosted.

‘Mr. Da Luca,’ Julian replied.

The noise of the coffee machine stopped. This was one conversation Julian did not need Eva walking in on. He stepped out onto the balcony, buttoning his jacket with one hand as he closed the glass door behind him.

‘Ah, you’ve been expecting my call,’ Mickey Da Luca said.

‘Or a visit. Yes, I suspected I’d hear from you at some point.’

‘I thought a phone call first would be more appropriate. I didn’t want to catch you when you’re busy. Like climbing out bathroom windows and the like.’

‘What do you want, Mickey?’

‘You have something that belongs to me.’

‘No, I don’t.’

‘Don’t try to be smart, Mr. Harte. You won’t like the result. I want Tamara back.’

‘She doesn’t belong to you. And you aren’t getting her back.’ Julian caught Eva walking around inside out of the corner of his eye. She was looking for him. Julian moved as far into the corner of the balcony as he could without going backward over the railing. If Eva found him, she’d almost certainly say something and her voice would carry over the phone. Mickey Da Luca would suddenly have a new interest.

‘I’m a reasonable man, J. Can I call you J?’

‘No.’

‘Okay, J. Like I said, reasonable and all that. I’m open to an exchange.’

Julian’s heart literally stopped. Eva. He knew about her.

‘Where did you get my number?’

‘Let’s just say we have a mutual friend in that pretty nurse down at the hospital. We concerned relatives have to stick together at a time like this.’

Julian’s heart pounded. Partially in temper, partially in anticipation of Eva opening the balcony door. ‘No exchange. No bullshit. How much do you want for her?’

‘Mr. Harte. I’m shocked. What kind of a man thinks he can buy a woman? Disgusting.’

‘How much, Da Luca?’ Julian growled.

‘Eight am. Be at the club. Come alone. We can negotiate.’

‘Eight am,’ Julian repeated.

His flight was due to leave at six am.

‘Oh and bring a coat, Mr. Harte. That’s a nice suit, but you’ll catch your death.’ Julian spun around, instinctively scanning the windows opposite and the road below. He couldn’t see who was watching him. He stepped back inside. Being in full view on the balcony after a statement like that was not a good idea.