Changing Tides (Kill Devil Hills Book 2) (15 page)

I hadn’t seen him since Ellie was here. He looked thinner than I recalled—and it had only been three weeks. “Hey, man,” I said by way of a greeting as he let me inside. “I came over to see if Mrs. Stone would watch Holly for the next few weeks—maybe longer.”

Ben took the cat from my arms. Holly willingly went to him
—
that’s right, they were best friends.
“Carrie’s taking her afternoon nap. But I’m sure she wouldn’t mind. She loves Holly.”

“Okay, thanks.” I glanced around the house. There wasn’t a single holiday decoration up. My mom’s house in Florida probably looked like Santa threw up red and green everywhere. It was strange for it to be December and for them
not
to have anything out. “You gonna be here for Christmas?” I wondered out loud.

“Yes. Just me and Mrs. Stone. She has a few relatives in Kansas—her sister’s kids. But traveling is hard on her and she said she’d rather spend the holiday at home.”

Normally, I would have already left by now. Sticking around for small talk wasn’t my thing. But for Ellie’s sake, I kept on talking. “I’m sure your family would love to have you home.”

He shook his head, running his hands through his already disheveled hair. “It’s complicated.”

“I’m aware. Ellie told me about some of it.”

“Of course she did,” he groaned.

For some reason, his negativity pissed me off like no other. It made me want to rub in what I knew. And so I did.

“I know you were the kid from that Coast Guard accident. I know the rest of the world thinks you’re dead. I also asked my lawyer about the specifics of it—hypothetically, of course. Whenever you do decide to come home, you’ll be facing jail time with the military. Desertion was the term he kept throwing around. Maybe even up to a year behind bars. On top of that, the state of California could decide to sue. I can’t remember all the particulars, but it won’t be easy for you.”

He glared at me. “Gee, thanks for all the information.”

Maybe it hadn’t been my place to ask my lawyer about all of this. It was his business, not mine. But that hadn’t stopped me when I’d called him just after Ellie left three weeks ago. I’d lied and told my lawyer that I was thinking about writing a movie script and needed the information. I’d asked because I cared about Ellie. And if my brother had pulled something like this, these were the things I’d want to know.

“You’re welcome,” I told him even though I knew he was being sarcastic with me. “I also know that your family loves and misses you. They want you home. Even the blonde haired girl—she seemed to miss you too. What was her name?” I’d spent the day at Disneyland with all of them, but suddenly blanked on her name. Then it came to me. “Sydney—that was her name.”

“Sydney was here?” he asked, his demeanor changing. “She knows I’m alive?”

Bringing up Sydney had struck a chord. Interesting.

“Yes,” I said sharply.

“Oh,” he whispered.

“I gotta go,” I told him. “But you should consider going home to your family. There are a lot of people waiting on you. Trust me, when we lost my dad, Christmas was the hardest time of the year. Consider it. It’s never too late to fix things.”

We said nothing else to one another. I let myself out and then hurried home. Now that Holly was taken care of, I needed to pack. Maybe Ben didn’t want to be where Ellie was—but I sure as hell did.

CHAPTER 16:

ELLIE

I
was on my third
first
date of the week. Today’s date wasn’t nearly as bad as the others had been. Mike was this guy’s name. He seemed relatively normal, nice even. So far we’d talked about 1) the beach and how much we both loved the surf and the sand, 2) tattoos—he had plenty of them and seemed to like that I did too, and 3) miniature golf. He was impressed that I owned my own mini-golf business and that that business didn’t require me to ‘conform to the normal rules of society.’ Whatever that meant.

“You know, I’ve seen you around before today,” Mike said. He palmed his beer but didn’t take a sip. He had dark hair, pale blue eyes, and freckles. Lots of freckles. This wasn’t necessarily a bad combination. It gave him an edgy vibe, especially when paired with his tattoos. I bet plenty of women found him sexy in a rock-star sort of way. “And I was surprised you agreed to go out with me.”

Well, I’d blindly agreed to this one. The dating website thing had been disastrous. So Rhett had resorted to setting me up with a friend of a friend. Mike wasn’t so bad, but this was going to be the last one of these I agreed to. It wasn’t helping. I felt nothing for him. Less than nothing. I kept zoning out thinking about someone else.

“I was surprised because I was pretty sure you were a lesbian,” he continued.

The word lesbian caught my attention. Right
.
How was I supposed to approach this
?
I still am? I used to be? I don’t have effing clue what I am? I grabbed my water because my throat suddenly went dry. “Yeah,” I muttered as I drank.

Then Mike leaned forward and whispered, “Have you ever had a threesome? Because I would love to have you and another girl at the same time. Are you into that sort of thing? You look like the type who would be.”

I choked on my water mid-drink.

Fuck this. Seriously? I stood up and walked away. I wasn’t about to sit there and pretend to be interested in him for another second longer. I marched across Chancy’s Claw in the direction of the bar. I was about to give Rhett, who happened to be working as a bartender right this minute, a piece of my mind. Except, he was already hurrying in my direction with a dumbass smile plastered on his face. “Your friend Mike is an asshole,” I started to say, but then Rhett grabbed my wrist and dragged me in the opposite direction before I could finish. We reached the bar and he pulled me down into a crouching position behind the counter.

“What the hell, Rhett?” I snapped at him, pulling my wrist from his grip and rubbing it because he’d squeezed it a little too hard. “Ouch. Did you even hear me? Mike’s a dick. What’s going on? Is Sydney here or something?”

“I wish,” he whispered. “No, we’re hiding because your celebrity just walked into the bar.”

Wait.
What?

“If you’re screwing with me then that is cruel,” I growled, “and we are no longer friends.”

“Ellie.” He glared at me. “I wouldn’t screw with you like that. He walked in with some guy. They’re sitting at table twenty-five—one of the booths against the far wall. Ten o’clock. See for yourself.” He pointed up.

Needing to see, I slowly stood and stealthily peaked my head above the edge of the counter-top. Sure enough, across the room, sitting in one of the booths, was the only celebrity I knew. Damn, he was even more handsome than I remembered—all bundled up in a black coat that only made his dark hair and skin stand out more. “Holy shit,” I whispered to myself and then ducked back down. “Why is he here?” I said louder to Rhett.

“I’m pretty sure it’s not for Chancy’s claws,” Rhett snickered to himself. “I’m pretty sure he’s here for you. So…what are you going to do?”

Probably vomit from sudden and complete nervousness. My stomach was now churning so vigorously that I felt like I might physically get sick. Or maybe I would hide out behind this bar for the rest of eternity. Both options seemed like real possibilities at the moment.

“Ellie,” Rhett said, nudging my arm. “Earth to Ellie. Want me to go talk to him? I won’t tell him you’re here if you don’t want me to. I can see what he wants—scope out the situation.”

For the first time since Noah had gone off to college, I missed him terribly. He was my sidekick and I needed a sidekick right about now. I needed him because I wasn’t sure if I was annoyed or thrilled by Nathanial’s sudden appearance. Either way, my heart was beating a million miles a minute. And Noah would have known what to say to calm me down. Rhett, on the other hand, was staring at me like Christmas had come early.

“Fine, go talk to him,” I told him.

“Yes.” He jumped up to his feet and left me alone on the floor.

I pulled out my cell phone and texted Nathanial immediately.

Me: What’s up?

Ever since I’d given in and broken our silence two days ago, our texting had increased tenfold. We were now messaging each other several times throughout the day—little random things, nothing too serious. But Nathanial had failed to mention that h
e
was
in the same freaking town as me
!
That information seemed kind of important.

His reply came quickly.

Nathanial: I’m having lunch with my brother. How did date number three go?

Me: Shitty. He asked if I wanted a threesome. Out of curiosity, have you ever had a threesome?

Fuck, why did I just ask that?

Nathanial: Yes.

Double fuck
.
I wasn’t sure how I felt about that.

Then again, of course he’d had a threesome. Why wouldn’t he have had one? He was a celebrity. I bet girls threw themselves at him on a daily basis. Except
…
why was I getting so freaking jealous over something that had happened in his past
?
I wasn’t a jealous person. The opposite actually.

I sat there staring at my phone. I didn’t know what to say in response.

And then suddenly my phone was ringing
.
Oh, Jesus
.
It was Nathanial calling me. Not sure what else to do, I answered.

“Hey,” I said, my stomach in a giant knot.

“Hey,” he said back, his gritty, deep voice soothing and calm.

Hearing him made me feel better—made me feel silly for comparing him to Mike. “I shouldn’t have asked you that,” I apologized, leaning back against one the beams that supported the counter. I stared up at the ceiling as I spoke. “Your past is your past. It was none of my business.”

“You can ask m
e
whateve
r
you want.”

There was such infliction in his voice as he said this, such kindness, such sincerity. He truly meant it and it made me go warm all over.

“Okay,” I whispered, “but you should know that just because I’m a lesbian, or whatever I am, that doesn’t mean I’d be into all that automatically. I’m a one person at a time kind of a girl.”

“And I don’t want to share you either,” he added. “We’re on the same page, Ellie. Why don’t you come have lunch with me and we can save this conversation for later? I’d love for you to meet my brother.”

I gasped. He knew I was here
?
How foolish was I
?
Hiding behind the bar counter, having this dumb conversation, when he’d known where I was all along.

“Fine. Give me a minute.”

I hung up the phone. Rhett was going to be on dishes duty at home for the rest of eternity for ratting me out. Meanwhile, Mike was still sitting at our table, looking off into space, waiting, like he expected me to come back and join him at any second. “What a moron,” I mumbled, standing and brushing off my khaki pants. Hopefully he’d realize soon enough that I wasn’t coming back. I’d thought I’d been clear about my intentions when I walked away abruptly after his threesome comment. Maybe he was too full of himself to understand. Or too dense. Whatever.

I’d also left my bag at his table in my haste to get away, but I wasn’t about to go over there and get it. I’d sooner leave it and have to cancel all my credit cards then face him again.

So, after a quick trip to the bathroom, where I splashed some water on my face and gave my image in the mirror a mini pep-talk, I went to Nathanial. The restaurant was giant, and kind of maze like even with the outdoor deck portion closed, so I was able to move past Mike without being seen.

Keep it together, keep it together, keep it together
,
I told myself.

As I approached, I noticed that his brother was the thinner, less muscular version of Nathanial. He had his same brownish-blackish hair, same height, and same nose. I bet his brother had to deal with fans mistakenly assuming he was Nate West all the time. Speaking of fans—none of the other five customers at Chancy’s seemed to notice there was a celebrity among us. That was one of benefits of winter in this town. Not many people came to the beach when it was freezing.

Rhett still lingered, standing beside Nathanial’s table, flipping a server’s tray absentmindedly, laughing at something someone had just said. “Ellie, I didn’t know you were here,” he gasped when he noticed me beside him. “This is a surprise. I thought you were at work,” he said with a wink. Wow, he was a horrible liar.

“Cut the crap, you knew I was here. We spoke five minutes ago,” I told him and squeezed past him to sit beside Nathanial in the booth.

“Oh yeah, I remember now,” Rhett said.

I only made eye contact with Nathanial’s brother as I sat down, not with Nathanial. My hands were shaking and my heart was racing—I didn’t need to look at him and make those things worse.

“Hey,” I said to the man across the booth from me. “I’m Ellie.”

“David,” he replied. His voice had a kind tone to it. I liked Nathanial’s easy-going, easy-to-get-along-with personality and I got the impression that David might have a similar way about him. But I was having trouble getting past one little thing about David…

David was gay.

It was one of those things I could tell immediately. Something about his manner or the way he dressed, something I couldn’t put my finger on, told me he was gay. And instantly I felt unease. I felt uneasy because what must he think of me? Surely Nathanial told him about my past, and my sexuality, and all my confusion. People came out of the closet all the time. It was normal for a gay man or woman to date the opposite sex throughout their entire life, be living a lie, and finally decide to come out publicly and date who they were always supposed to date. It wasn’t normal to do the reverse. What if he looked at me and saw me as a betrayal against the whole LGBT community?

But that wasn’t what the LGBT community was about. We didn’t judge others based on who they loved. Diversity was something to be celebrated, not rejected. I’d always believed that and stood by that. And David wasn’t looking at me with judgy eyes. Nope, he was looking at me like he was meeting his brother’s girlfriend and he couldn’t be more thrilled that it was me. Which was a whole different issue in itself, one I’d think about and deal with later, but for the first time since I met Nathanial on that airplane I wasn’t so damn confused about who I was.

I was just me. Lesbian. Straight. Whatever. I didn’t really matter.

Holy cow
,
I thought as relief washed over me. Finally realizing this felt like a weight was being lifted off my shoulders—like I was back in control.

Wow. It felt good.

I smiled at David. “What do you think of the Outer Banks so far?”

“Different than Miami, but I like it,” was his response.

“You’re from Miami?” I asked him, not too surprised. Both he and Nathanial seemed like they belonged to a big city.

He nodded. “Yes, Miami is home.”

“Is that where you grew up in Florida?” I asked Nathanial, unable to ignore the man beside me another second longer. My body was already hyperaware that it was him sitting beside me. The wonderful way he smelled, the heat rolling off him, the way I noticed and was fixated on each breath he took
—
dammi
t
, I couldn’t really hide my excitement about seeing him again, especially now that I’d just had this epiphany about myself. All my worries about threesomes and going on pointless blind dates were immediately forgotten. There was only one thing I needed to explore—the connection I felt with the man beside me.

“We grew up in Key Largo,” he told me. “My mom still lives there but David, Rogelio, and their two kids live in Miami now.”

“You guys want to order?” Rhett interrupted. He still stood beside our booth. He wasn’t normally a server, but Rhett had worked here so long he could do any job. I was positive whoever was supposed to be our server was pissed as hell right now that Rhett was taking their table. He’d probably be murdered the second he stepped back in the kitchen.

David and Nathanialboth ordered. I ordered my usual, the shrimp roll
—
agai
n
—since I didn’t get to finish my meal with Mike.