Chaotic (Imperfect Perfection) (25 page)

“That doesn’t matter, Zoey. It’s
the fact that he lied to me on more than one occasion and never fessed up until
I heard the truth with my own ears. Maybe he would have told me, maybe he
wouldn’t have, I’ll never know, but it doesn’t matter.”

“Well, sounds like you have your
mind pretty made up then. I promise this is the last time I’ll bring it up. So
now we’ll have fun together for the next few days.” I smiled at Zoey, who I
knew was only trying to be helpful, but I was glad that we were done.

We all rolled over onto our backs
and Zoey pulled out the sunscreen she had brought out to apply it to the front
of her. Seeing her look like a lifeguard with a layer of white across her face,
made me glad that I didn’t have to worry about fair skin.

“What about things between you and
Nash?” Callie asked after we heard Zoey’s heavy breathing, a sign that she had
all ready fallen asleep.

I shrugged my shoulders, because I
wasn’t really sure how to answer that question. Nash had been there for me a
lot after the break up, comforting me whenever the girls weren’t around. He had
become almost a permanent fixture at our dorm and often ended up sleeping on
the couch when we would stay up late watching movies and eating take out. But
we had definitely stayed in the friend’s zone, I hadn’t been ready or wanted to
jump right into another relationship.

“I don’t know, he’s a great friend,
and I’m not sure if we’ll ever be more. I mean, yeah I’m attracted to him, who
wouldn’t be? But I’m not sure if we would ever work out in any kind of
relationship besides being friends. I don’t know if I really want to risk our
friendship to find out either. I don’t even know if I’m ready to move on.”

“I think you are,” she replied
confidently. “Maybe that’ll be with Nash or someone completely new. You handled
yourself a lot better than you think, Della. You’re strong. And I think Nash
would be willing to give things a shot with you, if you were. Even if things
don’t work out, I think he’ll always be there for you.”

I nodded my head at her, chewing on
everything she had just said. I didn’t even know if Nash wanted that type of
relationship with me anymore, he hadn’t mentioned anything of the sort to me in
awhile. I hadn’t seen him with any other girls, and I didn’t know how I would
handle that if I did.

I must have dozed off after awhile
because droplets of water rained down on my skin, making my eyes pop open
instantly. I wondered how long I had been laying there because my skin felt
like it was being scorched by the sun that was now glaring down on us, and the
water didn’t have that chill to it like earlier.

I felt another sprinkle of droplets
hit my foot, so I sat up to find a smirking Nash bobbing in the water by my
feet. “What are you doing out here?” I asked, smiling as he shook his head back
and forth, looking just like a wet dog with those big brown eyes.

“Well, I’ve been watching you for
awhile. I was out mowing the grass for my mom, and I couldn’t believe you were
out here just laying in the sun while it’s so fucking hot. Want to go for a
swim?”

I looked over at Zoey and Callie
who had both fallen asleep as well and nodded my head, really needing a cool
off.  “Sure.” I slid into the water, letting out a loud sigh as it cooled my
body down and grinned when Nash splashed me.

I chased after him as he took off
in the opposite direction, creating a typhoon of water around him as he took
broad strokes. I looked around for him when the water finally became still and
knew what was coming when I couldn’t find him.

I felt a tug on my ankle seconds
later and was pulled under, holding onto his hand as he dragged me back up to
the surface. “Sorry,” he said sheepishly as I spit a mouthful of water onto his
face. “I just can’t help myself, you’re such an easy target.”

“It actually felt pretty good thanks.
I needed it. I won’t be surprised if I actually end up burning.”

“I wouldn’t mind helping you rub
some aloe on that,” he replied, no smile present upon his face as I stared back
at him. I didn’t know if he was joking or not, so I ducked under the water
again to avoid him. When I came back up that serious expression was gone as he
floated on his back, and I swam to the edge of the raft. “How are your sister
and your niece doing?”

“Good, I was actually thinking of
taking Madison to the zoo tomorrow while Serena’s working. Do you think you
would want to come with us?” I looked up at Callie and Zoey who were now awake
and both gave me quick nods of their head when they heard his question. I
couldn’t help but roll my eyes. They were so worried about my love life. It’s
not like I needed to have a boyfriend at all times.

“Sure, that sounds good.” Nash knew
I wasn’t very comfortable around kids since he now knew about the abortion. He
had taken it shockingly well, better than Mariah had probably expected and
didn’t judge me at all. I was kind of shocked that he was asking me.

“Awesome, I’ll pick you up around
nine if that’s all right. Madison likes to get an early start to her day.”

“Sounds great.”

“All right, well I better head back
in and see what else I can do around the house for my mom while I’m home. The
guys and I are taking a road trip next week, so I might as well let her use and
abuse me while I’m here.” I grimaced at his choice of words, abuse making me
think of all that he had suffered over the years from his dad, but the smile
never disappeared from Nash’s lips, so I tried to not let it bother me.

“You have fun with that, I think
we’re going to head back in for lunch in a bit and veg out for the rest of the
day.”

Callie and Zoey joined me in the
water after he swam to shore, breathing out sighs of relief as the cool water
suddenly felt good. Zoey looked like she had a little bit of red tint to her
skin, so we decided to take our picnic inside and hang out for the rest of the
day.

I couldn’t believe how much we had
to catch up on after only being apart for two weeks. We made a list of places
that we wanted to check out while we finished off most of the sandwiches and
cookies Grams had made. “Are you guys sure that you don’t want me to tell Nash
I can’t go tomorrow? We could get an early start and go see a few of these
places.”

“Absolutely not. We’re most
definitely sleeping in tomorrow. I’m sure we’ll just be waking up by the time
you get back.” Zoey nodded her head in reply, stuffing a handful of chips in
her mouth.

“All right.” I was kind of looking
for a way out of it, but I had all ready agreed, so I guess I would have to go
through with it. I had a feeling it would be a very interesting day.

“Nash, is she your girlfriend?”
This is what I heard as soon as I opened up the passenger door to Nash’s truck
the next morning. I looked towards the back seat to see Madison strapped into
her car seat, her blonde hair pulled into two lopsided pigtails and a pair of
daisy sunglasses covering her eyes. Nash smiled into the mirror as I shut my
door and sat down stiffly.

I hadn’t really had much contact
with kids really ever and since having the abortion, I seemed even more
uncomfortable around them. It always made me think about what could have
happened if I kept the baby. Would it have been a girl or boy? What would I
have named it? Would I have been a good mom? I shook my head, clearing those thoughts
that always crept forward and grinned when Nash responded to Madison.

“Well, Della’s my friend and she’s
a girl, so-”

He was quickly interrupted by her
tiny four-year-old voice. “So she is your girlfriend, I knew it. She’s pretty.”

“I know,” he agreed before reaching
over and grabbing my hand, squeezing it lightly and not letting go for the rest
of our drive to the zoo.

Once we got there, Nash had to stop
in each tiny shop to buy Madison at least one thing. To say she was spoiled by
her uncle was an understatement. It was weird to see a guy in his mid twenties
act that way with a four-year-old, but very sweet. By the time we got to the
first animal exhibit, Madison was loaded down with two new stuffed animals, a
bag of cotton candy, and two hair bows that had little koalas on them.

She grabbed both of our hands as
she squealed at the sight of the polar bears, planting her face against the
glass to get the closest view. Nash gave me a reassuring smile as he pulled his
aviator sunglasses down and I relaxed just a little bit.

By the time we were finished for
the day, my feet hurt, I was ready for a nap, and I had a new best friend. It
was hard not to fall in love with Madison. She had to be one of the sweetest
and smartest little girls around.

Nash picked her up halfway back to
his truck, her eyes starting to droop close as soon as she laid her head down
on his shoulder, but not before she gave me a sweet smile. “I’m going to take a
nap, you can give Uncle Nash kisses now.” I giggled at her and could see Nash’s
chest vibrating with laughter as he strapped her in the back, tucking her
stuffed animals in next to her. He placed a kiss on her nose before getting
inside the truck.

I looked back at Madison to see
that she was all ready passed out. I turned around to find Nash’s eyes on me,
staring intensely back. “What, do I have something on my face?”

“No, I’m waiting for that kiss
Madison gave you permission to give me. Then we can head home,” he raised his
brows at me, just waiting. I licked my lips nervously, my hands suddenly sweaty
at the thought of kissing Nash again. It had happened before, but I hadn’t been
so nervous. Maybe it’s because this could actually mean something now. Before
he had Mariah and all I had really felt was guilt. Now seemed different.

I leaned over slowly, brushing my
lips over his waiting ones and went to pull back but didn’t get very far. He
pulled me close, deepening the kiss with a sense of urgency, our teeth clashing
together as we both opened our mouths. His hands slid down the sides of my
body, settling at my waist, and he moved even closer. His tongue slipped inside,
it was sweet and warm, but nothing like kissing Justin. With Justin everything
just seemed so right, like we were two pieces of a puzzle made to fit each
other.

I stuffed those thoughts down and
let myself be in this moment right here, right now. Nash pulled back, staring
at me with hooded eyes as we both breathed heavily. Glancing at the back seat
to see a sleeping Madison, he threw the truck in reverse. “I think we’re
actually lucky that Madison was here. I think that would have gone a lot
farther if she wasn’t, and I want to take things slow with you, Della. I want
to make sure you’re ready for this, truly ready.”

I didn’t know the answer to that,
so I just grabbed his hand and gave it a small squeeze, looking out the window
as if the answer to that would be somewhere out there because I really didn’t know
if I was truly ready for another relationship.

Nash pulled his truck into my grandparent’s
driveway, leaning over to give me a hesitant kiss on the cheek after putting it
into park. “Thanks, Nash. I had fun today with both of you. Maybe we can do
something like this again soon.” I moved to open the door but he grabbed onto
my elbow to stop me.

“Della, do you think we could meet
up later tonight? I know Callie and Zoey are staying over but I was wondering
if you could sneak away for a bit. I wanted to take you somewhere.”

“Um…” I really don’t want to ditch
Zoey and Callie again but those brown eyes looked so pleading, and I gave in
almost immediately. “Sure. It’s not too far though is it? I don’t want to keep
ditching them the whole time they’re here.”

“Not at all,” he answered with a
smirk. “Meet me out back around ten.”

Once I got back into the house, I
found Zoey and Callie just getting up for the day and that relieved some of the
guilt that was eating away at me for leaving them. They quickly got ready and
we all piled into my car, heading towards campus.

My phone rang as soon as I pulled
out of the driveway and I groaned when I saw Mia’s name pop up on the screen.
After her and my mother’s visit at Christmas time, I wasn’t exactly her biggest
fan. She had basically flirted with Justin right in front of me the whole time,
acted like a bitch towards me, and was rude to my family. Mia had definitely
changed since the last time I had seen her from the perfect model child my
parents had made her into be. But she was my stepsister after all, albeit a
little evil.

“Hey, Mia. What’s going on?”

“Della,” she said brightly through
the phone. “I’m so glad I got a hold of you. How’s your summer been going?” I
could hear loud music in the background, and I could only guess she was at a
party of some sort. Mia definitely had that whole partier look down.

“Pretty good,” I replied vaguely.

“Awesome. Oh, by the way, so sorry
to hear about you and that hot piece of ass breaking up. Lillian filled me in
when I got back last week.” The fakeness in her voice was so blatant, but I
really didn’t feel like talking about Justin with her at all.

“Yeah, well, it is what it is. I’m
actually busy right now, was there a reason you called?” I hated to sound so
harsh, but I didn’t know how much longer I could stay on the phone with her if
she decided to stay on that particular topic.

“Actually, there was. Lillian told
me that you were looking for a new place to live with those roommates of yours.”
Since when did Mia and my mother talk so much? We had been mending our
relationship a bit lately and talked at least once a week. She seemed pretty
proud of the direction that my life was taking and had taken up an interest as
to what was going on with me. It felt great to have my mom actually involved in
my life, but I was still a little cautious that she would once again turn into
a stuck up bitch that wanted nothing to do with me.