“If there is anything I can do, please let me know.”
“Thank you, but you’ve done enough. Most people would have ignored it and not even called the police. I can’t thank you enough.”
I didn’t say anything else as I let myself out of the store and into the morning sun. He was right. I had done enough. He just didn’t realize that none of it was good.
* * *
Just before I let myself back into the apartment, Heven’s voice floated through my mind.
Everything okay where you are?
Yes, everything is fine,
I said, lying again.
Sorry.
Don’t be sorry, I get it.
And I did, I mind dialed her all the time just to make sure she was okay. It was exactly why I lied to her about what was going on. She didn’t need any more to deal with right now. Besides, she was already uneasy around Logan and this would just make it worse. It was hard to juggle things—responsibilities—and I was tired. I let myself back into the apartment and Logan looked at me with stricken eyes.
“Everything is fine. They don’t suspect you.”
He let out the breath he had been holding. “I’m so sorry.”
“I know you are.” I sat down next to him on the couch. “How long has this been going on, Logan?”
“Since before I ran away from home.”
“You didn’t tell me.”
“I thought that it had stopped. I thought that being here with you would make it better. It did for a while…”
He thought I had the answers to everything because I was a hellhound. I didn’t want to tell him that I had been figuring it out as I went, and that the things he was doing didn’t seem normal to me.
“There have been times that you remember, uh, getting mad?” Maybe he was just sleepwalking, maybe he thought that he was responsible and he really wasn’t.
“Yeah. I trashed the bathroom at home before I left. I got into a fight at school and I trashed the place you first lived when you moved out of our house.”
I swallowed, trying to show no reaction to the things he was saying. I wanted him to feel comfortable talking to me.
“The kids at school deserved it,” he muttered.
“What kids?”
He looked away, ashamed.
“Logan,” I pressed, grabbing his shoulder.
He shrugged me off. “Brent and his crew.”
“The jocks? They were giving you problems? They never had before.”
He looked at me and then it hit me. The reason he never got picked on was because of me.
When I was there, I must have been protecting him. No one ever messed with me. Well, one kid did once… but he never did again. I never realized that it was me that kept the bullies away from Logan too.
And then I left.
And he was fresh meat.
I didn’t think I could feel any worse than I had earlier when I found him crying in the mess. I was wrong. I failed my brother. My parents might have stopped loving me. They might have abandoned me, but Logan never did. He was a victim in all this, just like me.
My emotions must have been clear on my face because Logan said, “Don’t worry about it. I taught them a lesson.”
“Oh yeah?”
He smiled. It was a smile that reminded me he was only fourteen.
“I flushed Brent’s head in the urinal.” He laughed.
I grinned. “Awesome.” I held up my fist and he bumped his against mine.
But then Logan’s face fell and he looked away.
“Is there something else?” I pressed.
He glanced up at the television which was playing the news. The woman on the screen was talking about the weather. “Think what happened downstairs will be on the news?”
“I don’t know,” I said, watching him watch the news.
“Sometimes, I hear voices,” Logan said, not looking at me.
“Voices?” How many more surprises was this kid going to lay on me today?
“Well, really only one. I used to pretend it was you.”
“Used to?”
“It started saying things that didn’t sound like things you would say…”
“What kind of things?”
“Forget it.”
“No, Logan. What kind of things?”
“Bad things,” he whispered.
I stood up from the couch, not wanting him to see the horror on my face and not sure enough that I could hide it. Anger, rage, voices…
What the hell was wrong with my little brother?
“Listen to me,” I said, pushing his empty cereal bowl out of the way to sit on the coffee table in front of him. “You aren’t alone anymore, okay? We are going to figure this out. I’m going to help you.”
He nodded, relief on his face.
“I know I work a lot, and I have responsibilities and a girlfriend, but I want you to know that you are important to me, okay? Don’t doubt that.”
He nodded again. “I know. Thanks, Sam.”
I stood and went across the room to grab some clean clothes and set them in the bathroom. “I’m going to take a shower. I have somewhere to be in a bit. You can come with me.”
“Cool.” All the intensity and fear from our conversation seemed to vanish and he looked like a normal kid on the couch, channel surfing.
But he wasn’t normal.
“Crap. I left something in the truck I need. I’m going to run down and get it and I will be right back.”
He nodded, absorbed in whatever he found to watch. I slipped out the door, avoiding the police still in the store and went around the side of the building in the alley. My brother needed help. I needed help to help him. I only knew of one person that might be able to help me. I stared up at the sky and prayed that she would listen, that she would come to me.
“Airis!” I said her name as loud as I dared, not wanting to draw attention.
Nothing happened.
“Airis!” I yelled louder this time, not caring who might hear.
Still nothing.
I began to pace. Why wouldn’t she come? Didn’t she care? Wasn’t it her job to care?
I let out a frustrated growl when a white light appeared off to the side and Airis floated through. She was dressed all in white like always and her blond hair was around her shoulders.
“You came,” I said, rushing toward her.
“Technically, I shouldn’t be here. But your intentions are good.”
“Why shouldn’t you be here?”
“Because Heven isn’t here, so this obviously does not involve Heven—the Supernatural Treasure you are meant to protect.”
“Heven is fine. I’m protecting her.”
Airis inclined her head. “Yes, you have done well.”
I didn’t say thank you because I got the feeling it wasn’t a compliment. “Look, you said to protect her at all costs. I’ve had to kill some demons—”
She held up her hand. “This isn’t about you and the demons after Heven.”
“Then what’s this about?”
“You are getting caught up in your lies. Be careful, Sam. Do not stray from your path.”
Lies? What lies? “If you mean what I told the police, I was protecting my brother. I think he’s sick, there’s something wrong with him. I need help to figure it out. You’re the only one that can help me.”
“Perhaps a doctor would help?”
I let out a frustrated growl. “You know I can’t take him to the doctor. He’s a hellhound. I think his body is rejecting the hellhound gene… it’s the only thing that makes sense. It’s supposed to be only one hound every other generation. I already turned; he wasn’t supposed to.”
“You need to focus on your responsibilities, on the scroll. On Heven. You are getting distracted.”
“Then help me!”
“I am helping you. You aren’t listening.”
“You’re telling me to forget about my brother—my only family, to just leave him alone when he is sick!”
“I’m telling you that you are straying from your path—your job. Don’t let the darkness around you cloud the way you think—the way you behave.”
“The darkness. You mean the hellhound in me. That’s why you won’t help Logan. Because he’s a hellhound and he hasn’t passed any of your ‘tests.’”
“Not every hellhound has your ability for good.”
Maybe they would if they weren’t treated like they were lepers. Like they were evil. It was obvious that Airis wasn’t going to help me and this was a waste of time.
“Thanks for the help,” I said sarcastically and turned my back on her to walk away.
“Remember what I said, Sam. Remember who your first priority is.”
She made it sound like Heven was a job, an assignment. Like she forgot that the whole reason any of this happened was because I’m in love with Heven, that I would die for her… I didn’t like being made to feel like this was a job. It wasn’t. This was my life.
And my brother was part of my life whether Airis liked it or not.
If she wanted to spew her riddles and half-answers then she could, but I wasn’t going to listen. I was just about around the corner when Airis called out to me. I stopped and turned, hoping she changed her mind.
“Remember if you or Heven need me just call.”
I snorted. She meant if Heven needed help because, just now when I asked, things went so well. I walked around the corner without another glance. She made it clear where I stood with her but it didn’t matter. I would find a way to help Logan without her.
Chapter Ten
Heven
It seemed a little strange to have a quiet, uneventful morning in the middle of an extremely unpredictable summer. It almost made me wary to relax so much.
Everything okay where you are?
I asked Sam.
Yes, everything is fine.
I sighed and concentrated on my cereal bowl. I wished Sam were here instead of spending the morning with Logan at his apartment. A few moments later, there was a loud clatter and a bang. I leapt from my chair, sending it crashing to the floor, and looked for the demon that probably just broke in.
“My goodness!” Gran said. “I didn’t mean to startle you. You’re about as jumpy as a cat this morning, Heven.”
I took in the tray at her feet and the upset tin of coffee on the counter and felt like a complete idiot. “Sorry, Gran,” I muttered, righting my chair and sinking back into it.
“It’s all right.” She began to clean up and bent to pick up what she dropped. “I know the last few days have been very stressful.”
“You do?”
“Of course, finding out you have a brother isn’t something that happens every day.”
She thought all of this was about Cole. I nodded and allowed her to think that, even though Cole was about the only thing that seemed to be going right these days.
“Did he find you yesterday morning?”
I nodded. “Sam and I were in the orchard.” And Cole got quite an eyeful. After Gemma left Sam and I sat Cole down and did our best to explain everything to him. It took a while because we had to go all the way back to last year when I was injured (I didn’t think of it as disfigured anymore because I wasn’t disfigured. There had been nothing wrong with the way I looked. The problem had been with the way I felt.) It was such an unbelievable tale I thought for sure he would think I was crazy and declare he didn’t want anything to do with me ever again. But he surprised us by believing everything we confessed. Thinking about it now, I guess it isn’t
so
hard to understand why he accepted everything. Cole had seen too much to discount everything we told him. The abrupt disappearance of my scar, the demon attacking me added to what he witnessed with Sam and Gemma made a very impressive case.
“I thought that’s where you might be,” Gran said while she finished cleaning up the spilled coffee grounds.
I made a noise of agreement while I wondered if the orchard was the best place for the boys to be training. What would happen if someone saw us like Cole did?
“He seems to be accepting everything fairly easily,” Gran said, drying her hands on a towel and coming to sit across the table from me.
Embarrassment heated my cheeks. We had been so busy explaining all the supernatural aspects of our lives that I completely forgot to ask Cole how he was doing. “Did he say how his mother was handling things?”
Gran grimaced. “I don’t think she’s very happy with me right now.”
“I met her once. She wasn’t very happy with me, either.” At least I finally understood why she seemed to hate me so much that day at the ice cream shop. She knew who my father was. Of course she felt angry and hurt that he essentially chose me and my mom over her and Cole.
“It’s been hard on her. Jason could have handled the situation better.”
“Why do you think he did it, Gran?”
Gran sighed. “I don’t know. I think he wanted to be part of Cole’s life, but his mother wouldn’t allow it after he chose your mother. I think Jason decided not to fight her and keep Cole a secret like she wanted, so he didn’t upset your mother too.”
I shook my head, trying to imagine what the situation would have been like and what I would have done in my dad’s shoes. But it was no use. I had no clue what I would have done and I can’t imagine having to choose between your children. Looking at it that way made me wonder why Cole wasn’t angry.
“Do you think Cole is angry?” I asked quietly.
“I asked him, told him it was okay if he was,” Gran said, taking a sip of coffee. “He said he wasn’t angry because he already had a father who loved him and he never felt abandoned.”
I nodded.
“I think he’s upset that his mother is so hurt by all this, but I think he is glad to know.”
I thought of how relieved I felt when I found out. It made sense of so many feelings that I didn’t understand. “Thank you for telling us.”
“It was a hard decision, but in the end I thought you had the right to know and… with Jason being gone…” Her eyes turned sad, but then cleared and she smiled. “I really wanted to know my grandson.”
I reached out and grasped Gran’s hand. We sat quietly for a while, Gran drinking her coffee and me drinking my orange juice until Gran cleared her throat and said, “It’s been really wonderful having you here.”
“I love it here too.”
“You and your mother are really getting along these days.”
My eyes went up to Gran’s face. What was she trying to say? Did she want me to leave? I didn’t want to leave. I liked it here. “She did agree to let me go to Italy,” I said, glancing at the clock, making sure I wasn’t running late for our meeting at school.