Chase of a Lifetime (6 page)

But that didn’t work. “Sit down and I’ll
make you another martini,” she said.

When he sat down on the sofa next to the
fireplace, she walked behind the bar and mixed the drinks. By the time she
returned, his hands had begun to shake again and he was sitting on them. It
took all the control he had to lift his right arm, steady his hand, and take
the martini from her without spilling it. He set it down fast on a mirrored
coaster on the coffee table and thanked her.

Mrs. Mayfield sat beside him and flipped
back her long blond hair. For a woman her age, she looked as young as Len
Mayfield. She wore a sleek white dress that night and two small diamonds in
each ear. Her shoes were expensive fawn leather pumps with a six inch heel.
They complimented her long, sexy legs. Jim’s mother and most of the other women
her age always whispered about Mrs. Mayfield’s trips to
Florida
in the winter. They claimed she
always returned looking years younger, which meant they were suggesting she
went to
Florida
for plastic surgery every year and never told anyone about it. He wondered if
Len had had plastic surgery so he’d look younger.

“I should be going soon, Mrs. Mayfield,” Jim
said. He faked a yawn.

“You’re a grown man now. You just graduated
from college. You can call me Janice. Enough with all the Mrs. Mayfield
nonsense.”

Jim frowned. He would have preferred to
continue calling her Mrs. Mayfield. It seemed as if his entire life had changed
in a flash. One minute he was a carefree kid in college and the next his mother
and father’s friends were asking him to call them by their first names. Someone
should have warned him about this in college. He could have been more prepared.

“Yes, I could do that, ah, Janice,” he said.
Her name stuck in his throat and it sounded disconnected when he spoke it
aloud.

Janice smiled and tossed her head back again.
“Oh, Jim, what I wouldn’t do to be your age all over again.” She took a sip
from her glass and laughed. “I’d certainly do things very differently, that’s
for sure. Len’s been a good husband and I’ve had a nice life so far. But I
would have spent more time getting to know him before we got married. We rushed
into it and we should have waited.”

This need for people to tell him the personal
details of their lives seemed to be contagious. He wondered if all the adults
he knew would start doing this now that he was out of college. “Ah well, I’m
sure we all have our regrets.” What else could he say?

Janice smiled and patted his hand. “Len’s been
a good husband. He’s always been honest and up front with me. I don’t have any
huge complaints. I just wish things could have been a little different. That’s
why it’s so important to get to know someone first before you get married, Jim.
And if you think there’s something you should know, don’t hesitate to ask. It’s
better to find out sooner than later, trust me on that.”

She didn’t sound unhappy; just disillusioned
with life in general. But it still caused a tug in Jim’s heart. “I really
should be going now.” He was afraid if he had to spend another minute in that
house his heart would jump out of his chest. He’d never experienced so many
different emotions in one night, one after the other.

“Did you know I used to change your diapers
when you were a baby?” Janice said.

Jim continued to stare at her without
blinking. “Yes, I’ve heard that, ah, Janice.”

“I don’t want to be presumptuous, Jim,” she
said. “I just think you’re putting too much emphasis on your future right now.
Take this time and relax a little. Enjoy yourself. Play the field and sow a few
wild oats, pardon the bad cliché. You’re a very attractive young man. I’m sure
you have girls chasing you all the time.”

Jim heard a door slam on the second floor.
He felt his heart jump and he pressed his palm to his chest. While Janice
Mayfield continued to offer him advice about enjoying his youth, as if she’d
missed out on her own youth, he waited for Len to walk downstairs and join
them. Sweat began to drip down the sides of his face. He wondered if Janice
would pick up on any underlying energy in the room and begin to suspect
something when she saw them together. He had a feeling every single emotion
passing through his body at that moment was written across his forehead. He’d
never felt so guilty or vulnerable or trapped at the same time. As Len walked
into the family room wearing the same clothes he’d worn to the party, Jim
 
jumped up off the sofa and turned to face him.

Len waved his arm and said, “Sit down, big
boy,” with a dismissive tone.

He sat and turned back to Janice. She was
still talking about how he should have fun and forget about his future for a
while. She glanced up at her husband and said, “I’ve been telling Jim he’s too
intense. He’s stressing himself out worrying about his future and he’s
forgetting all about enjoying himself.”

Len poured himself a glass of vodka and
said, “I agree. He should do whatever makes him feel good.” Then he sent Jim a
seductive glance, grabbed his dick, and winked right behind his wife’s back.

When Jim saw this, he stood up and said, “I
really have to go.” This time he meant it and no one was going to talk him into
having another drink. These people were nothing like he’d imagined they were
growing up. He’d always thought of them as the perfect couple, with the perfect
son, and all his illusions had been shattered in less than a few hours.

Janice stood up and put her arms around him.
She kissed him on the cheek and said, “If I were you, I’d loosen up and spend
the summer dating three or four girls. You don’t have to tie yourself down to
anyone right now. You’re young. You’re supposed to live and have fun. I’ve
always instilled this in Cain.”

Len didn’t even turn around. He remained at
the bar, listening to every word Janice said. “Which is why all Cain ever
thinks about is having fun,” Len said.

Janice ignored Len and squeezed Jim’s face. “I
bet you can’t figure out how to get rid of the girls.”

“Well, not exactly,” Jim said. “I’m not
really much of a ladies man if you want to know the truth.” Whenever
conversations swayed in this direction, Jim had learned how to respond without
giving himself away. Self-deprecation always seemed to work well for him.

Len faced the opposite wall. But Jim knew he
was listening.

“I’m shocked,” Janice said. “If I were a
young girl I’d be chasing after you. I don’t think you’ve realized the power
you have over women yet.” She turned and gestured to Len. “Don’t you think Jim
underestimates himself when it comes to his looks?”

Len said, “Yes, he highly underestimates
himself.” He turned around and smiled at Jim. “I think he should date five or
six girls if that’s what will make him happy.”

As they walked down the hall to the front
door, Janice said, “Cain is going to be home later this summer, taking some
time off before he starts graduate school in
California
. He’s visiting his new
girlfriend’s family in Austin for a short time. But he’ll be around here soon
enough. You should give him a call. You boys were such good friends growing up.
I’m sure he’d love to hear from you. You can spend time hanging out just like
you used to do.”

Jim heard footsteps coming from behind. He
knew Len was following them. He didn’t turn back. He nodded and said, “I’ll
give him a call, Janice.” Her first name still didn’t sit right with him. But
he didn’t want to be rude. After all, he’d just been seduced by the poor
woman’s husband. He’d just seen her husband’s erection, for God’s sake. He owed
her this much respect.

On his way down the front walk, he heard
Len’s voice. “Thanks for driving me home, Jim. I really appreciate it. Make
sure you have some fun this summer with the girls. You’re a man now.” He
emphasized the word girls, as if making a joke about it.

Jim’s balls jumped up in his scrotum. “No
problem, Mr. Mayfield.” He couldn’t get out of there fast enough. He’d never be
able to look these people in the eye again. But more than that, he’d never be
able to look his old friend, Cain, in the eye again either. With any luck at
all, he wouldn’t see them again for months.

On the fourth of July, Jim’s mother and
father had their annual poolside party. It always began at two in the afternoon
and lasted until six in the evening. They never deviated. They always served
grilled salmon and free range chicken. The side dishes were organic veggies and
fruit salad. The bar was stocked with vodka and mixers for almost every
different martini available. They even had cute little stirrers with
multicolored cowboy hats to keep the Texas cowboy theme flowing.

This year the party was extra special
because it was Jim’s twenty-first birthday and his mother and father had just
put in an outdoor living space next to the pool. The outdoor living space
consisted of plush sectional sofas in tasteful shades of beige, state of the
art stainless steel appliances that would have made most standard indoor
kitchens pale in comparison, and specially sized outdoor carpets in
southwestern patterns to cover the expensive pavers.

It wasn’t as large a party as Jim’s
graduation party had been. There were only thirty of his mother and father’s
closest friends there that afternoon. The men wore baggy swum trunks and
lightweight jackets to hide their middle aged paunches. The women wore one piece
swim suits and sheer jackets. They hid under umbrellas, bathed in sunscreen,
fearing a hint of sun would drive them to the nearest cancer center. If anyone
wanted to smoke, even though they were all outdoors anyway, he or she had to
leave the poolside, walk through a gate at the far end of a tall fence, and
stand alone, as if being punished, beside an old tool shed Jim ’s father had
been meaning to renovate for years. Jim’s mother had set a yellow plastic
ashtray on a dead tree stump. If a hint of cigarette smoke made its way back to
the pool area, it was amazing to watch them cover their faces and hold their
breath. The pot they would smoke later that night didn’t seem to bother them.

Because this birthday was a milestone for Jim,
his father had planned something special that afternoon. While he quieted the
guests and explained that Jim was about to come outside and do something
interesting, Jim stood in the kitchen holding his palm to his stomach. He wore
tight black swim trunks and a jock strap to keep his penis packed down. As he
listened to his father ramble on about how he would be attending law school
soon, Jim groaned and glanced down at his bare feet. He hadn’t told his father
he wasn’t going to law school. But he hadn’t said he was definitely going
either. On one hand, he had no great passion to be an attorney. On the other,
he wasn’t dead set against law school. Unfortunately, the only passion he had
that summer was to find out what it was like to be with a man. And this
need…urge…seemed to cloud his judgment in ways that made him feel irresponsible
and unreliable.

His father walked up to the glass doors off
the kitchen and said, “Are you ready?”

Jim adjusted his dick and patted it down.
“I’d rather not do this, dad. Can’t I come out like a normal person and enjoy
the party.” He didn’t mention the fact that there were no people his age there
and it would be impossible to enjoy the party.

His father laughed. “C’mon, son. Don’t be so
uptight. This is going to be a huge hit. We’ve been practicing it over and over
all month. Show them what you’ve got.”

Although Jim had never been much of a
swimmer, his father had been on the swim team in high school and in college.
He’d been encouraging Jim to swim and learn to dive since he was old enough to
walk. “Okay, dad,” Jim said. He spoke with a dejected, downtrodden tone. “I’ll
do this once. But only once. And if I screw it up, it’s not my fault.”

As his father introduced him to the party
guests, Jim walked to the door and opened it wide, making his grand entrance,
wishing he could disappear. He stepped out in the hot sun to applause from
thirty middle aged people had hadn’t seen in years. His stomach jumped; his
throat tightened. He walked to the end of the pool, climbed up to the diving
board, and walked out to the end. Everyone went silent while he found his
stance. He pressed his feet together as his father had taught him. He started
rocking up and down to gain momentum, concentrating on what he was about to do.

Then he made one quick leap into the air,
twirled backward twice in such an awkward way he thought he might vomit in
mid-air, and landed flat on his back against the warm blue water. The impact
stung and he knew he’d screwed up the dive. As he sank to the bottom of the
pool, he imagined how his arms and legs must have looked flying around every
which way. He closed his eyes and wondered how long he could remain down there
without taking a breath so he wouldn’t have to face anyone. A minute later, he
had no choice but to swim to the surface. When he did, his father and mother
were leaning over, gaping down at him with huge smiles. The rest of the crowd
was applauding and cheering him on.

He climbed out of the pool and reached for a
towel his mother was holding. He hugged his father and turned around to face
the guests. While his father shouted and praised the awkward dive he’d just
made, he forced a smile and nodded a few times. As he glanced around the outdoor
area at the guests, he wondered why Len Mayfield wasn’t there. Len always
attended all their parties. He saw Mrs. Mayfield at the other end of the pool
standing beside a group of women his mother knew. But Len wasn’t anywhere in
sight and he didn’t dare ask where Len was.

*****

Later that night, his mother and father went
out to play bridge with friends who lived a few miles away. He knew they’d
return laughing, smelling of pot. It was a Friday night and Jim didn’t feel like
sitting home alone again. He was tired of jacking to porn on his computer and
bored with riding a dildo. He wanted to find out what it was like to be with a
real man, and at twenty-one years old he didn’t think he had a moment to waste.