Chasing Shadows (25 page)

Sarah’s hands itched to do something. Naturally, she bent down, packed together a hefty ball of snow, and nailed Damien between the shoulders.

He spun around, looking perfectly shocked. Sarah folded her hands in front of her innocently—though incriminating droplets of melted snow ran off her fingertips—and painted on her most angelic smile. “Something wrong?”

Damien was still stunned into silence, and she couldn’t contain her giggles anymore, biting her lip as a few slipped past. Her laughter caused Damien’s face to relax, and his own grin appeared.

“Did you just assault me?”

She beamed in a self-satisfied way. “This is
my
favorite winter pastime.”

“Bludgeoning unsuspecting aristocrats from behind?”

Sarah shot him a look of mock exasperation. “Well, I certainly couldn’t sneak attack them from the front, now could I? That’s no way to win. And I didn’t bludgeon you; killing my opponent in a snowball war isn’t very sportsmanlike.” She leaned over and snatched up a quick handful of snow that she tossed his way, showering him with powder. He laughed and shook his head, but he didn’t retaliate. “Come on, Damien. It’s too cold outside to stand still, and you have to get me back—that’s part of the game.”

He took a few steps toward her, his grin dark with intent. “So it’s a game now, is it?” Eyes trained on her, he bent down with deliberate slowness and scooped his hand beneath a layer of snow. He straightened as he packed it into a ball, watching her the whole time.

“Oh, stop building up the tension and launch that sucker!”

Damien’s laugh echoed through the silent clearing. “But you don’t even have one of your own to strike me back.”

Sarah shuffled from foot to foot, partly to keep warm and also because she was feeling more eager by the minute at the childlike excitement she saw creeping into his eyes. Jumping back several steps to put some distance between them, she called, “I appreciate the chivalry, but you won’t win if you’re a gentleman. All’s fair in love and war.”

Grinning, he called back, “So is this to be in the way of an execution?”

Sarah thought about that. “I’ll give you one for free, and then I’m on the move.”

Damien chuckled as he wound up, and she stood patiently. The snowball splattered lamely a few feet in front of her. She laughed. “What was
that
?”

“I’m not certain I can hit a lady.”

She hadn’t thought about that obstacle before him. “Just pretend I’m not a girl.” Even from this distance she caught his raised brow as his eyes drifted pointedly over her dress, and she knew she was going to have to help him along.

Setting off at a run, she did circles around him, scooping up snow as she went. She launched a hard-packed ball at his backside, and he jumped, obviously surprised at her brazenness. Sarah only laughed.

He hesitated a moment longer before his face split into a playful grin. He launched a half-hearted attempt at her back as she breezed past him, and she dodged the lazy ball with ease. Apparently, he still had qualms about hitting a girl. Sarah goaded him into not holding back by sending another one flying, where it exploded against his chest.

Damien appeared surprised at her good aim and froze. Then he took off after her, laughing and tossing snowballs at her back as he got into the spirit of the game, slipping and sliding as he went. She dodged most of them, though he was getting the hang of it and caught her in the arm on his last throw, knocking the ball she was forming out of her hands. It crumbled to the ground just as she ducked to avoid another spiraling bomb that
puffed
into a shower of white powder when it hit her shoulder. He needed to learn to pack them tighter, but then again, maybe he was going easy on her. Judging by the way his aim was improving with each toss, maybe that was a good thing.

He was pretty spry for a wounded guy.

“Is that all you got?” Sarah called over her shoulder. She laughingly avoided his attempt to grab her around the waist, though it was apparent by the way he hung back that he was enjoying the chase too much to end it. She cut to the right and blindly tossed an armful of powder over her head to distract him. Spinning around, she scooped up snow as she moved and quickly packed the mound into a perfect projectile. She stood her ground, ready to face-off Western style.

Damien shook the wayward flakes from his hair as he jogged through the cascade of snow settling to the ground. The brightness in his eyes told her he was not going to slow down.

With a squeal, Sarah skipped to the side just out of reach and instinctively threw the snowball into his bad arm. She gasped, knowing how hard she had packed the thing. Damien brushed off the snow as she ran over to make her apologies.

“I am so sorry.” Her hand hovered in front of the wet spot on his coat. She grimaced as she met his eyes, and her stomach roiled a little in sympathy at the thought of the hard snow slamming into his tender flesh. She rushed on. “I wasn’t thinking at all. I feel so bad—that was horrible. Are you okay?”

Damien blinked a few times as if dazed, and she grabbed his good arm to steady him in case he passed out from the pain. His eyes cleared, focusing on her. Snaking an arm around her waist, his grip surprisingly strong after being stabbed just yesterday, he pulled her closer, dipping his head down so their noses nearly touched. 

“Just fine,” he replied. Sarah’s heart sped up. He was so close that she imagined his whiskers grazed her own skin, and she felt rather than saw the grin that spread over his lips. “But I will give you a head start.”

She blinked. “What?”

Damien’s eyes narrowed wickedly, and the gold flecks were visible even in the gray light as he murmured, “I wouldn’t be much of a gentleman if I didn’t allow the chase to go on.”

It took a moment for his words to sink in, and when they did, she grinned in relief, thankful he was only teasing her and trying to divert her attention from the game.

Easing back until he had no choice but to drop his hold from around her waist, she folded her arms across her middle and eyed him. “Just a head start, huh?”

He mimicked her stance, though his came off relaxed rather than challenging. “I can’t let you have all the fun, can I?”

Sarah bit her lower lip to keep from laughing, but he caught the action, his eyes lowering to her mouth. His own tipped, and he leaned forward as he met her gaze. “You had better start running, my lady.”

She opened her mouth in mock protest and then surprised him by dashing to the opposite side of the clearing. He hesitated only a moment before taking off after her.

She smiled, the wind stinging her cheeks as they ran in sync, Damien always just a few paces behind her as his laughter carried over the crisp air. Sarah had never felt so free or alive, and she knew that he felt it, too.

~Chapter 23~

Will dropped the pile of wood carelessly beside the fireplace, and the pieces landed in a haphazard heap. He didn’t bother to stack it into its usual tidy pyramid but stared at it intently, arms folded across his chest. His eyes remained on that spot, focusing until he was staring blindly and all thoughts unrelated to the hunks of wood began to fall away. It calmed him some to repeat the ritual that freed his mind and had allowed him to push aside the pain after his parents’ murders. Without it, he was sure he would not have been able to function under the weight of the emotions that might have destroyed him at the time.

But he could feel his mind rebelling against his restraint, and he allowed a single image to slip through. Sarah smiled up at him, hair fanning out against the pillow to frame her beautiful face. The candlelight reflected off her blue eyes, softening their warmth as they silently conveyed to him that he was good and
worth
something. Will had been taken aback the first time he saw that expression in her eyes so long ago. He had longed to reach out and touch his hand to her cheek in his uncle’s cabin that morning.

In his mind’s eye, his hand moved out to do just that. But when he blinked, the thumb that he envisioned stroking the curve of her throat belonged to Lisandro. The Spaniard leaned in, and Sarah whispered the man’s name as he neared.

Will slammed his fist into the wall to dispel the image. The tranquility of his mind was shattered, replaced by a yawning emptiness and frustration that he could not overcome. Where was his calm? His
control
? He was certainly losing his mind if this was how he spent his days, trapped in disquieting imaginings, which were also untrue, if the complete honesty and innocence on Sarah’s face were any indication. She certainly believed nothing was occurring between her and Lisandro.

Will, however, was not so easily convinced of the lord’s good intentions. Sarah might trust the man implicitly, but Will wasn’t fool enough to completely absolve Lisandro before he did a little digging into his character. He had yet to find trust for the man—the fact that they had never met face-to-face aside—and couldn’t be sure that he and Lisandro hadn’t experienced the same unsettling vision of a moment ago, though it was, perhaps, far pleasanter for the Spaniard.

The idea of the stranger having
any
thoughts concerning Sarah made him ill.

“You okay, Taylor?” The uncertainty in his employee’s voice brought his mind to the present. Will became aware of his scowl and the way his hands were planted against the wall, as though he were trying to push right through to the other side.

Straightening, he squared his shoulders and resumed his usual emotionless mask, but it was becoming increasingly difficult to keep up: Life was wearing on him.

Robert stood with one foot planted inside the building, more than likely having halted when he witnessed his employer attempting to smash a hole in the wall. “You look a little sick.” He paused before asking hesitantly, “Is something the matter, sir?”

“I’ll live,” was the curt response.

Robert nodded and entered cautiously. He stooped to right Will’s mess, neatly piling the wood against the wall.

“Saw your friend leave earlier,” he remarked as he stacked the pieces. “The lady left with some guy. Wasn’t sure if you got to say hello.” Casting a glance up at his employer, Will caught the inquiry in his gaze.

Exhaling, he shook his head, and some of the pretense chipped away. “Yes, I spoke with her.”

“And the guy?”

Will folded his arms across his chest. “Is none of my concern, nor yours.”

Robert seemed to shrug it off, rising to his feet. They had been working together long enough that he appeared used to his employer’s dark moods and didn’t take offense. “You seem a little agitated, is all, and I wondered if it was connected.” He eyed Will, who returned his stare with a disinterested glare. Robert shuffled his feet and seemed suddenly reluctant to make eye contact. “My Nonie used to say that baggage carried by two people is a lighter load. Do you, uh, want to talk about it?”

Will blinked, surprised. Inquiring after his employer’s feelings had caused Robert some discomfort, but he had asked nonetheless. Will’s Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed, moved by his concern and willingness to listen. Besides his uncle and Sarah, he hadn’t another soul in whom he could confide—certainly not someone who was willing to “share the load” with him, as Robert had put it. For the first time, Will’s eyes were opened to his self-imposed isolation, and he realized how lonely he had become.

Scrubbing a hand over his face, he growled into his palm, “It’s complicated.”

“Relationships generally are.” Was that amusement in his voice?

Will moved his hand to the back of his neck and rubbed madly at the knot there. “It isn’t—it’s not—” He stared blankly at the floor. “As I said, it is rather complicated.”

“But you love her, right?” Robert sounded certain of the fact, so Will declined to answer. He slanted a look at the younger man, whose lips were beginning to quirk in a sympathetic, knowing way. “When she was here the other day, a blind turtle could have seen the way you looked at her. Pardon me for saying so, but when she left, you looked like a puppy that had been kicked in the sternum. Kind of like you do now, though maybe a little angrier. And jealousy isn’t a great look for you.”

He received a steady glare, and Robert held up his hands. “Sorry, poor choice of words. What I’m trying to get at is that your defense mechanism is to shut down, but I guarantee if you do that now, you’ll practically be shoving her into the arms of that guy.”

However oddly worded, the man made some sense. Will forced himself to lower his shoulders and relax. Releasing a strangled breath, he asked, “So what is it that I should be doing? I’ve tried everything to no avail.” He shoved a frustrated hand back through his hair. Was he truly seeking council from his worker?

Robert scratched his ear, thinking. “Well, have you told her how you feel?”

Will paused, his fingers caught on a few snarled waves. Lowering his arm with precise calm, he answered evenly, “Perhaps there is one thing I have yet to attempt.”

Robert shot him an incredulous look. “Okay,” he said slowly. “Well, why don’t you do that? Or if you can’t say it, then show her how you feel. Maybe give her a token of your affection. Girls love that stuff.”

The wheels in his head were already beginning to turn, but still he was reluctant to bare his heart. “I’m not sure. . . .”

A shrug. “You can take my advice or leave it. All I’m saying is that I wouldn’t let some slick poser like that”—he hiked his thumb toward the door—“steal her away from me. If you don’t act now, you’ll lose her for sure. And trust me, lost love sticks with you forever.”

The man clearly spoke from experience as his face clouded, but Will could tell it was a closed subject.

Trepidation, excitement, and acute fear collided in his veins, but he was not turning back this time. Will nodded slowly, a determined gesture. He clapped his employee on the shoulder, grateful for the man’s advice, however unorthodox it might be. “Thank you, Robert.”

The blond man grinned before turning his gaze to the fireplace. They watched the flames dance for a solid minute when Will felt eyes on him. He turned and caught Robert’s amused gaze.

“I was thinking now, sir.”

“Oh, yes. Yes, of course.” Will moved in the direction of the door.

“And, Taylor?”

He glanced over his shoulder. Robert nodded once, and the gesture was full of confidence. “You’ll get the girl. The good guy always does.”

Will sucked in a breath, hoping to muster the assurance that the other man seemed to possess, but he was far less confident in the outcome.

****

He replayed his speech in his head as he walked, but his mind went blank the closer he came to the castle walls. His palms were beginning to sweat despite the chill in the air, and he swiped a hand hastily down the side of his trousers. He was behaving like a nervous youth coming to court a princess, but he was unable to shake his apprehension. Now or never, had been Robert’s meaning. One opportunity to make things right.

He was going to be ill.

Hesitating for a brief moment outside the castle gate, Will ducked his head and went around the long way. Not wanting to vilify Sarah’s reputation by coming in through the front gate, he decided to make his way along the outer wall that bordered the forest. It would be easy enough to slip inside via one of the concealed entrances he had discovered as a child.

He moved close to the stones to keep from being spotted by the guards patrolling the parapet walk atop the wall. His anticipation and apprehension increasing with each hurried step, Will lengthened his strides, desperate to put an end to this wait yet also wary of an unsatisfactory outcome.

As he neared the west end of the castle, the lively and incessant sounds coming from the square ebbed until he could pick up the faint sound of a woman’s unintelligible shout ahead of him. Pulse quickening, Will paused out of habit, listening intently as he tried to discern the location of the noise. His uncle Thomas had taught him quite a few things about hunting and scouting when Will was a boy, and the older man had frequently stressed the importance of patience and precision, saying that they could mean the difference between hunting and being hunted.

Though he’d loathed hunting as a youth, Will was later grateful for his uncle’s instruction: remaining unseen had been necessary in his past endeavors as the Shadow, and, though not as essential, he was grateful for that skill now.

However, when muted laughter came from the same direction, Will dismissed the noises for the moment, heart rate returning to normal, as he focused on the sound of footsteps above. He closed his eyes, lips moving silently as he counted each footfall. Even Will admitted to himself that his actions were a bit extreme, but instinct and past experience had taught him to rely on the shadows, and he preferred to remain unseen. Satisfied that the guard had passed overhead, Will dashed into the trees before the next sentry spotted him and asked why he was snooping around the castle.

Keeping near the forest’s edge, Will picked his way through the trees, his ears constantly attune to his surroundings. The noises coming from the heart of town were all but extinct, and the only accompanying sounds were that of the snow crunching beneath his boots and the throaty laugh of a man that carried over the crisp air to Will’s ears. Now he was sure there were two of them.

It would be easy enough to outwait the couple, though he wasn’t sure if his patience could hold out that long as his eagerness to see Sarah grew with each agitated footfall. He watched the outer wall disappear at the back and knew he had only a little further to go before the forest expanded to his right to curve around the small clearing behind the castle. Will’s eyes scanned the open area, searching for the jovial couple, if they were still there. The clearing appeared devoid of life, so he stepped carefully from the covering of the woods, gaze constantly shifting as he moved further into the open. He froze in his tracks when he spotted the man and woman in what appeared to be a lover’s embrace.

In a flash, Will retreated to move behind the corner of the wall and flattened himself against it. The gentleman’s voice was an indiscernible murmur, and he didn’t appear to have spotted the man that lurked in the shadows. Instead of simply approaching the couple like a traditional human being, Will eyed the trees longingly, counting the number of paces to the forest’s edge. In a few brief seconds, he could be enveloped in the cover of the trees, and they would be none the wiser. 

He had just pushed off the wall when the woman spoke. Will’s eyes snapped to the couple as she pulled back from the man, though his arms remained around her waist. Will was some distance from them, but the auburn hair that framed her tan features were so familiar that it left little room to question.

Sarah folded her arms across her chest, and from this distance, it appeared to him that she was being held against her will. The man leaned his face down so their noses nearly touched. Will’s muscles tensed as his blood turned to fire. Clenching his fists at his side, he took three steps forward, ready to fight. But then Sarah’s face broke into a grin, and she took off at a run, laughing as she went. If he wasn’t certain of her identity before, the familiar sound that floated back to his hiding place left no doubt.

Will jerked to a halt, frozen in surprise at her sudden gaiety. The fellow, who he assumed was the infamous Lord Lisandro, chuckled as he ran after her. Will was sickened to realize that the scoundrel kept up the chase for longer than necessary as they tossed snow at one another. He was contemplating bursting in on their little game before the Spaniard got any ideas into his head when Lisandro caught her around the waist, which caused him to lose his balance. Sarah shrieked as they tumbled to the snow, with her landing on the man’s chest.

Will’s fist balled again, and he felt the delicate stem snap in his grasp. He slowly uncurled his fingers to stare at the offended flower that he had searched so hard to find in the snow. He felt a moment’s sadness that he had ruined such a perfect specimen and glanced up at its intended recipient, almost expecting her to have noticed that he’d ruined the gift.