Chasing the Prophecy (Beyonders) (68 page)

O
n a bright morning, as Rachel prepared to mount her horse, a soldier sheepishly approached her. His tentative attitude did not match his large stature or his sharp uniform. He held a small scroll. He looked a bit like a child who had been dared to venture alone into a graveyard.

“Pardon me, milady,” he said. “A moment of your time?”

“What can I do for you?” she asked, trying to sound friendly.

“Nothing, milady. I have a message for you from the king.”

Rachel noticed Tark and Ferrin watching the exchange from a short distance away. She held out a hand, and the soldier passed her the scroll. She broke the seal and read it. Her veil caused a little interference, but the message was brief. Galloran meant to come speak with her tonight.

“The king is welcome anytime,” Rachel said, returning the scroll to the soldier.

With a little bow he backed away, then turned and walked off. Did he seem relieved? Rachel thought so.

As she mounted her mare, Rachel wondered how a conversation with Galloran would go. She had a lot of pent-up feelings.
Part of her looked forward to a visit from him; part of her dreaded it. Her fears about the validity of the prophecy remained unresolved.

Each day that the army advanced without trouble reminded Rachel of their danger. The emperor knew they were coming but did nothing to hinder them. And why should he? His enemies were handing him victory. Rachel would not have been shocked to find complimentary refreshments waiting along the roadside.

Ferrin had conferred with Galloran. The displacer had reported that it was hard to read whether the king had already taken the possibility of a false prophecy into consideration. In the end Galloran had firmly maintained that they could not turn back.

Ferrin and Tark had accepted the verdict. Rachel was not comfortable with the decision but felt she had to hide her dissatisfaction. She had already vented her concerns through Ferrin. Her misgivings had been considered, and Galloran had made his choice. The others had moved on. Who was she to keep complaining? Who was she to be more doubtful than a displacer? Who was she to question a king?

Rachel took her place near the front of the column. Tark and Ferrin followed a respectful distance behind. Over the past days Rachel had found her confidence in Galloran eroding. Since their last meeting he had spoken with her twice on the road—short, pleasant conversations. Superficial conversations. He had not mentioned his discussion with Ferrin, and neither had she. The topic had not seemed appropriate anywhere they might be overheard.

Galloran had not reached out to her mentally for days. Rachel had decided not to trouble him by using her private telepathic access. If he wanted to communicate, he could reach out any time he wanted. He had a private tent.

Now he had announced that he would be paying her a visit, but not until the evening. She was left to stew about her concerns. The more she thought about the potentially false prophecy, the more disappointed she became in Galloran for dismissing such a likely danger, and the less she wanted to think about him, let alone speak with him.

After a long day alone with her thoughts, Rachel felt a blend of terror and relief when Galloran appeared at her tent that night. Only Io accompanied him. Ferrin and Tark left the tent, and Io stood guard at the door.

With a low groan Galloran sat beside Rachel on her cot and put on his blindfold. “Ferrin is worried about you,” he said without preamble.

“I’m all right,” Rachel lied.

“I regret that I have been so occupied,” Galloran said. “There is much to manage.”

“I don’t want to be an extra burden,” Rachel assured him.

“Ferrin suspects that you continue to fret about the validity of the prophecy.”

Rachel stared at his blindfold. Maybe her friends weren’t as oblivious to her worries as she had assumed. She realized that she was pausing for too long. “Actually, yes. I’m still suspicious that Maldor could have used the oracle to direct us right where he wants us.”

“I can see how this idea would trouble you,” Galloran said. “The possibility would make you feel as though my misapprehension was leading us into a massacre. You would feel bound by duty to quietly accept my ruling, even though that very silence could be killing us all.”

“Something like that. I don’t want it to be true. It just really seems to fit.”

Galloran nodded. “The absence of resistance has created a terrible suspense among my soldiers. I feel the tension as well. Let me share what comfort I can offer. I knew Esmira better than most, both personally and through my aunt, the Pythoness. You realize that I could see her mind when we conversed. I searched hard and found no trace of deception.”

“That’s comforting,” Rachel said.

“I did not expect deception from her. Esmira had an impeccable reputation. But I was aware of the potentially devastating consequences that could arise from even the smallest untruth. We were in a predicament where any degree of wishful thinking could have led us down a futile and deadly path. During my interview and when she issued the prophecy, I scrutinized both her demeanor and her mind. I am satisfied that the prophecy is authentic.”

“Could Maldor have deceived her?” Rachel asked. “Could he have used torivors to plant a false prophecy?”

“The Temple of Mianamon is heavily shielded against mental intrusion,” Galloran explained. “And perhaps no place in Lyrian is better insulated than the chamber where she gave us the prophecy. I sensed no torivors in our vicinity at any time after I won the duel at the Last Inn. Furthermore, even had torivors been granted access to Esmira, they would not have been able to confuse an oracle of her quality.”

Rachel sighed. The responses made sense. But she still couldn’t relax. “If she was so powerful, couldn’t the oracle have guarded her mind against you knowing she was lying?”

“Possibly,” Galloran admitted, “though I don’t believe she would have been so foolish as to trust a bargain with Maldor.”

“What if he meant it?” Rachel persisted. “What if Maldor doesn’t care about the jungle? What if he promised to leave it
alone if she helped him? What if she looked into the future and saw that he would really do it? What if she saw that the rest of Lyrian was lost either way, but that deceiving us would at least save the children of Certius?”

“You have really thought this through,” Galloran said.

“Is there a chance I’m right?”

Galloran paused before answering. “I suppose there is a chance.”

“Doesn’t it fit what Maldor would do? Doesn’t it seem like what he did with the Word?”

“It does. I just don’t believe Esmira would stoop to dealing with Maldor under any circumstances. And I don’t believe the emperor would offer to spare the jungle. Not in sincerity. His objective is total domination. He is certainly in position to achieve it. He did not need her help to defeat us.”

“He didn’t need the Word, either,” Rachel argued. “He just likes to experiment with better ways to control everybody. He likes finding easier ways to win. He likes getting his enemies to destroy themselves.”

“I see how this must have been eating at you,” Galloran said. “You describe a plausible scenario.”

“I’m worried that he’s controlling us,” Rachel said. “What if he’s using your faith in the prophecy against you?”

“It’s possible,” Galloran conceded. “But what if our faith is the only attribute that can save us? What if your fear of Maldor is making you imagine a conspiracy where none exists?”

“That’s the problem,” Rachel said. “I’m not sure I’m right. But a fake prophecy makes lots of sense. If I knew I was right, I’d make everyone listen. But I’m not sure. Not a hundred percent. I can’t be sure. I have no proof. There probably wouldn’t be any proof.”

“If it is any consolation, I cannot be absolutely sure either,” Galloran said. “We can seldom be utterly certain about any choice.”

“I could live with having only a small chance of victory,” Rachel said. “I could handle the fact that we would probably lose. If our decision were between a small chance and no chance, I agree, we take the small chance. But I’m having a hard time dealing with the possibility that our small chance of winning might be based on a lie.”

“If the prophecy proved to be erroneous, do we have a better road to travel?”

“We could live longer,” Rachel said. “Who knows what other options we might discover? If the prophecy is a lie, there might be some other way to beat Maldor that we haven’t noticed. Some hidden vulnerability. There might not be just this one crazy path the oracle showed us. Like with the Word, the prophecy could be a distraction from better ways to reach our goal.”

“I’m not sure what vulnerability that could be,” Galloran said. “Many of us, including the wise among the Amar Kabal, have sought such a weakness for decades. Maldor just keeps getting stronger. In truth, I was concerned that the oracle would see no road to victory. But she did. And so I am trying to walk it.”

Rachel did not respond. She had tried for days to imagine a possible vulnerability but had come up with nothing. This moment was no different.

“I could send you home,” Galloran said, breaking the silence.

“What?”

“We’re marching to Felrook with an army. We have Ferrin. Whatever perils await us, I’m sure we could smash the defenses protecting the portal to your world.”

“But wouldn’t that mess up the prophecy?” Rachel asked. “We have to stand united. That doesn’t sound united.”

“If you aren’t committed to this course of action, we won’t be united. In that case, I would rather see somebody survive. I never meant to force you to help us.”

Rachel thought about it. Galloran was right. He could probably send her home. She hadn’t considered the option. But what about Jason? What about everyone? Was she really willing to give up? Did she really think the prophecy was false? She had worried that Galloran had been deluded, but he had clearly thought this through at least as deeply as she had. Were her misgivings just a product of her nervousness?

“I feel lost,” Rachel finally said.

“Doubts can be that way,” Galloran said. “Once they take hold, they can seem very real.”

“What if they
are
real?” Rachel fretted.

“If there were no chance they could be real, the doubts would hold no power.”

“Don’t you have doubts? What do you do? Ignore them? How do you deal with them?”

Galloran rubbed his mouth and chin. “When I have doubts about a decision, I search for a better alternative. In this situation I see none. The only alternatives are different versions of waiting to be conquered. My next step is to examine the reasons I have to believe. I am confident that Esmira was a true oracle. I am confident that she would not have dealt with Maldor. I did everything in my power to verify the truthfulness of her words and came away satisfied. If I find my reasons satisfactory, I cast aside my doubts and proceed. Show me proof that my doubts are real, and I would feel differently. Show me a better alternative, and I would reevaluate my position.”

“That makes sense,” Rachel said. “It’s just so hard. Attacking Felrook seems so hopeless. I can’t imagine what secret Jason could learn that would make a difference.”

“That is where faith becomes necessary,” Galloran said. “I can’t envision what he will learn either. If I could, Jason’s quest
would be pointless. Faith isn’t knowledge, Rachel. Faith is a tool. Faith keeps us going until we get the knowledge. Faith keeps us striving until we reach the consequences of our most important decisions.”

“What if we have faith in something that’s wrong?” Rachel asked.

“Then we’re heading for disappointment. But even misplaced faith can help us gain knowledge. We try to be smart about where we put our faith. And we adjust as we learn more.”

“You’re convinced the prophecy is real,” Rachel said.

“I’m convinced. If I thought it was false, I would turn this army around. I do not wish to hand Maldor an easy victory.”

“So I just need to forget about my doubts?”

“That choice is yours to make. If you mean to press forward, you must overcome your concerns. For anything worth accomplishing, we can always find reasons to doubt, just as we can also find reasons to proceed. I have weighed my alternatives. In these circumstances—with my fate in the balance, with your fate in the balance, with the fate of the world in the balance—I have chosen to side with faith and hope over doubt and despair.”

“We had faith in the Word,” Rachel reminded him.

“And the Word did not perform as we expected. It was not the end of the journey, as we had hoped, but it was part of the journey, perhaps a necessary part. Though I spent long years in the dungeons of Felrook, I do not regret my faith in the Word. That faith helped me eventually learn the truth of the matter, and brought me to where I now stand.”

“Okay,” Rachel said.

“This army is marching to war,” Galloran said. “You must decide how you will proceed. I hope you will have faith in the prophecy and faith in my judgment. Without your participation
I’m not sure we can win. But if you ask it of me, Rachel, I will send you home. I can always press onward hoping that your role has already been fulfilled.”

Rachel didn’t need time to consider a response. She respected and loved Galloran. She had promised Nedwin that she would protect him. She couldn’t imagine ditching him. “I won’t abandon you. I won’t abandon Jason and everyone. This conversation has helped me. I think I can manage my worries now. I’m sorry if I’ve been a pain. I didn’t want to see us tricked because I didn’t fully explain myself. Your thinking makes sense to me. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I went home now. We have to try.”

Galloran patted her shoulder. “We’re lucky to have you. You’re a very intelligent young woman. Please come to me if you have other concerns or if you perceive other alternatives.”

He stood, removed his blindfold, and exited the tent. Ferrin and Tark returned a moment later.

Ferrin looked a little shamefaced. “Sorry. I talked to Galloran behind your back. I could tell you were having a difficult time, and I thought he could help better than anyone. I hope I didn’t make you too uncomfortable.”