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Authors: Kim Cash Tate

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Hayes paused, maybe realizing he'd revealed more than he'd intended. “I got tired of battling with Cole about what to listen to in the car. Alien's album snuck up on me. I started letting it play even after I'd dropped Cole off.” He looked at Brian again. “I . . . walked away from church as a kid because my mother had an affair with the pastor, and my dad left us. But I'm starting to see it's not about one pastor or even about ‘church.'” He paused, and it was clear he was reflecting. “Your songs penetrate.”

Brian and Hayes continued their conversation, and Phyllis turned toward Cyd.

Wait till Cole hears this
, she mouthed. And then in a low tone, “He's been praying so long for his dad.”

“Excuse us a sec, Phyllis,” Cedric said. He pulled Cyd aside. “You plan to talk to Dana and Scott while they're here?”

Cyd glanced over at them and sighed. “I think I have to, but I sure don't want to.” She looked into Cedric's eyes. “How did you know I'd decided?”

“I could hear it in your voice when we talked this morning. I knew that's how God was leading you.”

From the time Cyd talked to Logan, the conversation had weighed on her. Stephanie and Kelli had been so focused on the Monica development that they'd forgotten to ask about it, which was fine. She wanted to pray and talk to her husband about it. “This is one of the hardest things I've ever had to do.”

“Cyd.” He tipped her chin. “I remember another hard thing you had to do. You had to beat me back with a stick when I was trying to lead you places you didn't want to go. You will never go wrong when you do what you know God wants you to do.”

“I know.” She sighed again. “But she's my best friend, and I know this will hurt her.”

C
YD TOOK THE SEAT ACROSS FROM
D
ANA AND
S
COTT AT
the dining room table.

“This seems so serious,” Dana said. “Why do you need to talk to us right now? Did something happen?”

Cyd nodded slowly. “At the conference.” She looked into both their faces. “Heather was there.”

“Heather? That's what this is about?” Dana's face tensed. “Come on, Cyd. She's the last person I want to talk about.”

Cyd put her hand up. “I totally understand. This whole thing took me by surprise.”

Scott reached for Dana's hand on the table. “What's going on, Cyd?”

“I don't know the whole story, but somehow Heather ended up without a place to stay, and Logan put her up in his room.”

“She's got her sights on Logan now?” Dana's voice rose an octave at least. “He can't be that stupid. She'll be the downfall of his ministry.”

“He wasn't in the same room. He stayed with a buddy.” Cyd chose her words carefully. “From what he said, though, whatever happened caused Heather to really examine her life. Logan prayed with her.” Cyd paused. “She committed her life to Jesus.”

“Praise God,” Scott whispered under his breath.

Dana cut her eyes at him. “Praise God? You're falling for this? It would be nothing for her to fake a spiritual experience just to get next to Logan.”

Scott didn't respond but looked at Cyd. “Where do you come in with all this?”

Cyd took a deep breath. “Logan said Heather needs someone to disciple her, that she doesn't know much about the Bible and has a lot of questions. He asked if . . . if I'd be willing to do it.”

Dana let go of Scott's hand and sat up. “You told him no, right?”

“I told him I'd pray about it.”

“Cyd, how could you?”

“How could I pray about it?”

“How could you even consider helping her after what she did to me? She was in my
bed
sleeping with my
husband
. She's despicable!”

Scott lowered his eyes.

“Dana, I was there.” She gazed into the eyes of her friend. “I'm the one who wanted to slap the girl. This is not easy for me. But God reminded me that I started praying for her a little while after that, for her to be changed. What am I supposed to do now that He's answered?”

Scott put his hand over Dana's. “The last thing I want to do is relive everything we went through last fall, but I was as much to blame for what happened as Heather. And I was shown mercy and given another chance.” He paused. “What if Heather really has committed her life to Jesus? What if she truly wants to learn and grow? Shouldn't she be given a chance too?”

“You know what, Scott?” Dana said. “I really don't feel like hearing you defend her. But fine. Let's agree she should have every chance in the world to learn and grow. But it should be with someone else's best friend.” Dana lifted her hands in frustration. “I can't believe we're even having this discussion. Doesn't Logan know we're best friends? Why would he ask you to do this, Cyd? It's not fair.”

Cyd was on the verge of tears. It really
didn't
seem fair. “I think,” she said slowly, “Logan asked because I was there when the need arose. But I also think”—
Help me, Lord
—“that somehow, even that might've been part of God's plan. I wanted to reject Logan's request instantly, but I couldn't. And I kept praying for God to give me a peace about telling him no. Instead, He gave me a peace about doing it.”

Dana stared at her for long seconds. “So that's it? You're going to disciple the girl who almost tore my family apart?” She pushed back from the table. “I need to go for a walk.”

“I'm going with you,” Scott said.

Dana turned. “I need to think this through by myself right now.” She cast a glance at Cyd and went out the door.

Cyd's heart was breaking. She couldn't remember the last time she and Dana had had a disagreement, but she was sure this one beat every one they'd had since junior high.

Scott stared at the door. “I understand how Dana's feeling, and I know this will rehash a lot of stuff I'd rather leave alone. But how can I not be glad for Heather? And she couldn't ask for a better mentor.”

“Well . . . pray,” Cyd said. “I still don't
like
her. But I really want to see her as God sees her.”

“I'll be praying. For Dana too.”

“B
RIAN
? D
ID YOU HEAR ME
?”

Brian snapped his attention back to Stephanie and the laptop in front of them. They were in the office just off the family room.

“Uh . . . can you repeat that?”

“Show me one more time what to do once we're done recording. How do we convert it to, whatever you call it, so we can e-mail it?”

“The mp3 file? Yeah, that's easy.” Brian walked her through it.

“This is great. I don't know how to thank you.”

“No problem at all.” His thoughts drifted again. He'd hoped to get a glimpse of Kelli, but she was obviously determined to steer clear of him, to the extent of missing her own party. He'd stayed longer than expected, but with the tutorial done, it was time to go. His phone rang, and he glanced at it. “Excuse me, I need to get this.”

Stephanie stood. “And I need to see what's taking these guys so long to get this food off the grill.”

He answered as Stephanie left.

“You won't believe it,” Harold said. “Got some good news.”

“What's up?”

“My old connections paid off. I sent your stuff to G-Freddie, and he digs your style. Said he'd be willing to guest on your album. That's huge, man! Crazy airplay on the radio. He could put you in the stratosphere. And check this out. He thinks you'd be helping him too. A feature on your album might clean up his image . . . he had a little problem with that jail stint recently.” Harold laughed. “What do you think?”

Brian had to temper what he wanted to say. “I think we need a face-to-face. Let's set a date. Will you be in St. Louis anytime soon?”

“What about? Just tell me now.”

“Okay.” Brian nodded, resolved. “This isn't working, Harold. We're not seeing eye-to-eye, and I don't even think you're listening to me anymore.”

“Oh, you just gonna dump me now? After I got you where you are?”

Calm coated Brian's insides. “You helped me get a deal, and I'll always be appreciative. But God got me where I am. If I had followed your advice along the way, I wouldn't have the ministry or the following I have now.”

“True,” Harold said. “You'd have a bigger following—but it's all good. I feel like God's been telling me to go back to secular anyway. Maybe He wants me to minister to those artists.”

“I appreciate your understanding, and I wish you well. I'll hit you up later this week so we can talk more about what we need to do.”

Brian got up, exhaling, feeling one weight lifted . . . but he still had a ton on his mind. He found Cyd and Phyllis in the kitchen setting out plates, glasses, and soft drinks.

“You're staying to eat, aren't you?” Cyd asked.

He put his hands in his pockets. “Thanks, but I need to head home.”

“You got a home-cooked meal waiting for you?”

He smiled slightly. “Grandma usually cooks, but she made Sunday her day off. There's always leftovers, though.”

Cyd stepped closer. “Let me put it this way. Are you hungry?”

“Well . . .”

She passed him a plate. “Brian, get some food.”

“But I saw the balloons and signs and everything. This is Kelli's celebration, and I know she's upstairs because of me. I need to go.”

The women looked at one another.

Cyd took the stoneware plate from him and exchanged it for two paper plates. “Pile the food high, and I'll wrap it up for you.”

“That'll work,” he said.

Phyllis passed him the baked beans and potato salad on her end of the counter. “Are you working on your next album?” she asked.

“Good question.” He gave an empty chuckle. “I should be, but nothing's really coming to me.”

“How can we pray for you?” Cyd was taking some macaroni and cheese out of the oven. “You've got to get some of this. It's Phyllis's specialty.”

“Oh, that's awesome—the prayers, I mean,” Brian said, then added, “but the mac 'n' cheese looks awesome too.” He turned from the food. “Please pray for direction. A couple of months ago I thought God was moving me away from my graduate studies and telling me to focus on music. But now I don't know . . . He might be saying the exact opposite.”

“Oh, Lord, please keep him in music,” Phyllis said. “Anybody who can reach my husband needs to keep doing what he's doing.”

Brian gave her an appreciative smile.

“Brian, I think we should all pray for you while you're here,” Cyd said. At his nod of agreement, she walked to the back door and called everyone in.

They trooped into the kitchen moments later, though he noticed one of the families had left. The dog trotted in with them, panting from an obvious workout outdoors, and went straight to her water bowl.

“Time to eat?” one of the little guys asked.

“Yep,” Cyd said, “but first we're going to pray for Brian.”

They formed a circle, and after Brian shared his heart with the entire group, Cedric began to pray. Brian was suddenly teary-eyed. Maybe because it was remarkable to see how far God had brought them both. Maybe because he had been needing a close circle like this more than he knew.

But maybe the tears stemmed from something else. Maybe because the one person he wished was in the circle, holding his hand and praying with him, was upstairs avoiding him.

thirteen

K
ELLI BOUNDED DOWN THE STAIRS
F
RIDAY, READY FOR A FUN
night out with her brothers and sisters-in-law. After dinner they'd catch a movie, and if they still had energy she'd pitch a stop at Ted Drewes for frozen custard, a St. Louis favorite she hadn't had in a long while. Being able to spend time with family like this was a new treat, but she looked forward to it for another reason as well—to get her mind off the mental roller coaster it had been riding all week.

She looked down at her constant companion. Reese had already fashioned new headquarters in her room, complete with a blanket the dog had dragged upstairs and lodged in a corner, along with a collection of toys. And now she'd started letting Kelli know when she wanted a walk. She'd just dropped her leash at Kelli's feet.

“Didn't Cedric walk you when he got home? And I know I walked you this morning.” Kelli rubbed her behind the ears. “I think I'm spoiling you.”

Cyd and Cedric were upstairs getting ready. They had thirty minutes before they needed to meet Stephanie and Lindell at the restaurant. Plus those eyes looked so pitiful.

“Okay, girl, come on. I'll give you a quick trip around the block.”

Kelli attached her leash and led Reese out the back door and down the driveway. A downpour earlier in the afternoon had ushered in a nice cool summer breeze. Kelli breathed it in as they trekked down the sidewalk and tried to breathe out everything on her mind.

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