Christmas Holiday Husband (21 page)

“I was very self-sufficient.”

“And so was I. I had to be. But Callum doesn’t have to be. He has sisters. God—they’re peas from the same pod. Have you seen the way they’re all built?”

Ellie nodded with resignation. “The same legs and narrow feet,” she agreed. “Your dark eyes in all three of them.”

“They’ll all be tall. It’s amazing watching them grow up. And I want to watch Cal grow up now I know he exists. My son. I’ve lost so many years already—don’t steal more from me.”

Ellie remained silent, unable to meet his eyes any longer.

“My son,” he said again. “I missed the excitement of you being pregnant, and the scan that suddenly makes it doubly real. I missed his birth. Missed seeing the new human being who was conceived in passion and should have been born with celebration and joy.” He reached out for her hand and this time she let him hold it. “The twins were such ugly, red faced little rats that first day, but they were awesome. New people, with all their life ahead of them, and me to help them and love them. Cal deserves that now, too.”

Ellie’s eyes prickled with his heartfelt plea. She knew he was right. Cal deserved to know his sisters and his father. To meet his grandparents when they returned from France. To spend time at Wharemoana and hear the family stories. To have his photo added to the long display in the upstairs gallery.

But where did that leave her? Trailing around behind Tony just so he could claim his son. Playing the wife for the sake of the children. Giving up her hard-won career, and the house which represented the security she’d always craved. Being exposed as a liar when Cal discovered Tony was alive and well. And losing her son’s love to his charismatic father.

Sure, there’d be financial compensations, but they were nothing compared to the emotional loss she faced. Right now she was in no shape to risk it.

Defeated, she shrugged, rose from the lounger, dived into the pool, and swam most of the length of it under the water, trying to obliterate his voice from her brain.

But still his words intruded. Inviting her. Enticing her. She could ignore his house, his farm, his forests, his wealth, his private helicopter. But she knew only too well that leaving the man himself would tear her to tiny pieces. He was exhilarating, charming, challenging, captivating...

Wrenching herself away from the passion and pleasure of his bed had already torn her to pieces. When he’d grabbed her on the beach—frustrated by her apparent deceit, and shirtless—Ellie had had no defence against his potent charm, his glorious hot sun-kissed body. He was right. She was no better than a bitch on heat.

But the heat of lust was not reason enough to marry. There had to be mutual respect and love. And whereas Tony had love to spare for Callum, there’d been no mention of any at all for her.

She burst up breathless from the turquoise water and looked back. Tony uncoiled his lean strength and prowled to the edge of the water. He stood impassive as the sun highlighted his broad golden shoulders, glanced off his long thighs; then he tensed—and all his muscles shifted and hardened. He launched himself out in a flat swift dive to join his three children. They surrounded him, thrilled he was there, adoring his company, while Ellie stayed resolutely out of reach at the far end of the pool.

xxx

“Good going,” Ginny said as she and Ellie set out salads to go with the barbecued meat that evening. Cal, of course, was hanging around Robbie, totally at his beck and call. “You’re doing better than I would have thought possible. Keep it up.”

“We’ve had words,” Ellie said.

“I saw you having some of them out by the pool. You did well to keep your voices down. The children have no idea what’s going on.”

“Let’s hope we can keep it that way then. Tony wants to do the full Dad-and-marriage bit. I’ve turned him down.” She caught Ginny’s hurt expression and cursed herself for being so insensitive. “Not straight away Ginny—he’s not that unfeeling. But maybe in a few months’ time to respect Julia’s memory.”

“I suppose you can’t blame him,” Ginny said, bowing her head. “He and Julia seemed to have very little happiness during the last year or two. It can’t have been easy for him. But he sees Cal as ammunition, does he?”

“The smoking gun at my head. I’m sick with love for my son, Ginny. He is my best, most shining achievement, and Tony wants to steal him. All the trust I’ve built up over the years will be worth nothing. I’d be willing for him to play ‘Uncle’ Robbie maybe—Cal could come out here for a visit now and again...” She set the serving spoon beside the bowl of potato salad.

“That’d never work, Ellie. If Cal himself doesn’t realise, someone else will. Once Robbie’s hair grows a little longer, they’re going to be unmistakably father and son.”

Ellie’s stomach lurched at the thought.

“God,” she said, wrapping her arms around herself to hold in the pain and fear.

“Not ‘steal’ him, Ellie—‘share’ him.”

She whirled around. Tony had left Cal watching the steaks and sausages. He’d walked across to join them, obviously some seconds ago.

“Never to
steal
him,” he emphasised.

“That’s what it feels like though. As if I’m losing him. Look at the way he’s hanging around you. A small identical shadow of his father. He can’t get enough of you. I’m superfluous all of a sudden.”

“Are there many men in his life?”

Hot rage knifed through her, slicing her to the bone. “What are you insinuating?

“Right now, any man would do.”

“I beg your pardon!” The red tide of anger sloshed higher.

Tony raised his hands in a soothing gesture. “At Cal’s age he needs to start learning men’s stuff. Any man would do. His mother and grandmother can’t quite fill that gap, however hard you try. Are there male teachers or sports coaches at his school?”

She dropped her gaze from his. “Hardly any,” she conceded with reluctance.

“So he’s just latching on to the most available man. Right now I’m totally available—for him and for you. Think about that in your solitary bed tonight,” he added as he turned away.

Ginny pursed her lips and raised an eyebrow at Ellie. “Difficult,” she said. “But also, unfortunately, right.”

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

“Meet me by the pool tonight,” he murmured as Ellie passed by on her way upstairs. “Eleven o’clock. We need to talk with no-one in the way.”

She shot him a withering glance.

“I mean it,” he said. “Or I’ll come in and get you.”

“You wouldn’t dare—not with Cal in my room.”

“Try me.” She saw his jaw tense and his eyes sharpen.

She shook her head, saying nothing more, but just before eleven she eased herself from her bed and sashed a slippery robe over her short nightgown, not prepared to take the risk of ignoring him.

What was he up to? What could he possibly say that hadn’t already been said? She padded barefoot down the staircase and out through the open French doors to the shadowy rose-fragrant terrace. The moon threw its silver light over the garden. The pool gate was chocked open—with Tony already waiting for her, pacing to and fro at the end furthest from the house.

“Thank you,” he said. “The bedrooms are well out of the way from here. We can talk.” He captured her hand. “Shall we swim?”

The pool lay like a sheet of dark silk. The night was so still and windless there was barely a ripple on its surface. Ellie thought back to the evening of the trampoline accident. She’d hoped to be sharing the inviting water with him later that night, but their romantic plans had been abruptly rearranged. Then, it would have been wonderful. Now, everything was a wretched jagged-edged disaster.

She shook her head, but he tugged her sash and had her robe off in seconds.

“No, Tony.”

“Yes, Ellie.” He dropped to his knees and wound his arms around her, pressing his face into the hollow between her breasts. Her heart lurched along under his cheek.

“I’m
almost
ready to beg,” he ground out.

Ellie gave a low frustrated moan; he’d turned her on again in seconds. However angry she’d been, however hurt, however astounded by his proposal of marriage so he could claim his son, Tony still made her feel acutely alive, and aware of herself as a woman. And no matter how hard she might try to wrench herself from his embrace, she’d never be free.

His hands slid up to push the straps of her nightgown off her shoulders. He kissed her breasts as he slowly exposed them, settling his mouth over each of her nipples in turn, sucking and nipping until she was exquisitely extended for him. “Good?” he asked, his breath feathering over her skin.

She could manage only a soft sigh. Damn the man—he was poison and pleasure all rolled into one. Offering to give, threatening to take. She wanted him so much, but it would be a sadly one sided arrangement. He held all the power, all the resources. And he seemed to expect she’d be content to tag along, accepting the crumbs of his big house, his ready-made daughters, his sexy body.

In return she was apparently to give up the life and career she’d strived so hard for, and the huge treasure of her beautiful son.

Tony peeled the flimsy nightgown lower, sliding it over her hips, down her thighs, until it fell in a pale puddle at her feet.

“Ssssshhh,” he said as she gasped at her nakedness. “No-one can see your gorgeous body except me.”

He stood and pushed at his boxers.

Ellie’s hands joined his in an instant, tugging the fabric away and sliding around his rampant moonlit length. “And no-one can see yours except me,” she murmured. “Just as well, really, given the state of you.”

“All your fault,” he said, drawing her into a long, luscious kiss. The distant roar of the waves from the beach washed over them—much as Ellie’s emotions tossed and tumbled in total chaos.

Shouldn’t be doing this,
she thought.

“Will you swim?” he asked again a few minutes later as their lips parted. He indicated the steps at the corner of the pool.

“I’ll watch while you do.” She settled onto the smooth tiles, still warm from the long sunny day, and dangled her feet in the near-tepid water. Tony immersed himself, and she kicked gently to splash him.

“Still spoiling for a fight?” he growled, standing in front of her and closing his hands around her ankles. He lifted her legs over his shoulders and leaned in between her thighs. “I’m going to lick you into submission,” he whispered.

“No you’re not,” she groaned—with no resolve whatsoever.

He bent lower, probing with his tongue, circling around and over her clitoris. Her hips lifted in helpless blissful surrender.

“Still no?” he enquired a little later, his breath hot against her slick flesh.

“Bastard,” she whispered.

All the reasons she had for refusing him melted away when they made love. Well, it was hardly love. Tony saw her as a sex-toy and a substitute mother for his daughters, but apparently nothing more.

It was no hardship being his sex-toy though...

xxx

“I still can’t marry you,” she insisted, much later in his bed. “I know we’re fantastic together. If it wasn’t for Cal, I’d say yes in an instant.”

“And it’s because of Cal that I
want
you to say yes.”

I know
, she thought.

“You’re being unrealistic, Ellie. I’ll see my solicitor next week and change the terms of my will.”

Her blood ran cold.

“The girls will be well provided for. But Cal is my oldest son. He deserves his inheritance. Marry me.”

“That’s despicable! Now you’re trying to blackmail me with your damn money. I can’t be bought, and neither can he.”

“I’m not trying to buy him, Ellie. I want him to have what he’s due. Wharemoana will belong to my oldest son. I want Cal acknowledged as such. After it’s mine, it should be his. After him, it will be the turn of
his
oldest son. Let Cal stay here and enjoy it while he’s still a boy. It’s a fantastic place to grow up. The space, the pool, the animals.”

He tried to draw her back against him, but she fought her way out of his arms, bristling with anger.

“He can have his own motorbike,” Tony continued. “Blast around the paddocks, safely out of the traffic.”

“Every mother’s dream!”

“Not right away. When he’s old enough. Ellie...”

“You’re trying to steal my life away,” she muttered.

“You’ve already stolen a huge chunk of mine,” he countered. “You’ve had my son for ten whole years. That’s long enough—I want my share of him now.”

“You’ll destroy his trust in me.”

“That’s total crap, Ellie. You’ll still be his mother. Nothing will change between you.”

She stared at him in panicked fury. Why did he not see her side of things? And how could they give each other such joy one moment and such pain mere minutes later?

She struggled free from his bed, slapped his restraining hands away, and bolted out through the open French doors. She left an aching silence behind her, and Tony with his fists clenched and his anger at fever pitch yet again.