Christmas With The Houstons (Acceptance #4) (13 page)

“I don’t whine, Connor, I pontificate.”

Mike pulls her in his arms and gently tells her, “I don’t think you want to tell people you pontificate
anything,
ever
again. Stick with whining… it usually gets you what you want.”

“You’re a jerk,” she says, punching him.

“But I’m your favorite jerk,” he replies, placing a kiss on the tip of her nose.

“Yeah, you are.”

“Look, halftime only lasts so long, so are you going to spill or what?” Daniel asks as he picks up Hailey and puts her on his shoulders.

“Go Chargers!” she yells then giggles as Daniel high-fives her.

“Jaxson Noah Houston,” I finally answer, putting them out of their misery.

“So you’ll call him Jack?” Connor wants to know.

“No it’s J-A-X-S-O-N. So, if anything, we’ll call him Jax.”

“Jax is an awesome name, much better than Jack. If you named him Jack you’d have to name the next one Jill,” Conner says with a smirk.

Jake is about to knock Connor upside the head but instead, I gently grab his hand.

“Can you guys take the babies? We have an appointment we’re going to be late for if we don’t get out of here.”

“Sure you don’t want to take them? I could use a night of sleep,” Connor grumbles.

“Two weeks, Connor. Help us get settled when we move in and I’ll keep them for an entire weekend for you guys. Maybe you can work on giving them some siblings.”

“Oh, I try for that all the time but Jess insists on taking the pill. One day my super seed will break past the barriers of her birth control. It did last time. But I’ll totally take you up on that weekend,” he says, reaching for Hope as Kate takes Zayden from Jake.

“Daddy, what’s super seed?” Hailey asks from Daniel’s shoulders. Mike lifts her off and puts her on the ground, snatching Grant from Misty.

“Ask your mommy, Hailey. Girls know all about it.”

After placing a kiss on the top of Luke’s head, Jake helps me up. Mike follows us into the house and before anyone else can come in, I turn to him and whisper, “Ask Misty again tonight, I think she’s ready to answer you.”

Mike’s smile could light up the darkest night sky. “Thanks, April, I’ll be sure to do just that. Where are you guys going, anyway?”

“Call Jake later and ask him. I’m sure he’ll be ready to talk to someone about it. See you later.”

“Later.”

Jake

As April programs the address into the GPS, I’m thinking about Connor. He doesn’t look good. Although he was his usually cocky self, he’s obviously exhausted. I need to figure out a way to talk to him about work soon. Or maybe I should just circumvent the problem and talk to my dad about hiring two more people ASAP. Hell, maybe I should do both. We need the extra help with all the new accounts Connor has brought in. With Jaxson’s birth looming in the horizon, the chance we might be taking in Mia,
and
the move, telecommuting is probably going to be my only option.

It’s an option we should have insisted Connor take when he took the job. The point of a family-run business is for it to be run by us, but the unrealistic expectations we’ve put on Connor are crazy. This is our fault just as much as it is his. He’s trying, and thinking about the drive I’ll have to start making—the same drive Connor makes every single day—has made me realize just how much he’s gone above and beyond. If a little extra work falls on my head now, it’s a small price to pay.

“What are you thinking about?”

“Connor.”

“He looks bad, doesn’t he? Do you think he’s okay?”

“I was just thinking the same thing. I’m going to fix this, April. It’s all obviously taking a toll on him.”

“Kate mentioned earlier Connor had been trying to do too much and it was affecting him. I had no idea. How did you not notice at work?”

Great, she talked to Kate.

Pulling the car over so I can focus my attention, I turn to her. “Did you talk to Kate about this, April?” I’m trying to stay calm but I specifically told her the other day she couldn’t discuss this with anyone.

“Not exactly, she more like guessed?” She isn’t meeting my gaze.

“Damnit, April! This is exactly why I didn’t want to tell you. Fuck!” I scream, slamming my hand against the steering wheel.

“She was asking questions, Jake, and I wasn’t going to lie to her.”

“Oh, so you just throw me under the bus. Thanks,” I reply sarcastically.

“It wasn’t like that and I would never do anything to hurt you. God, Jake, I just want our lives to go back to normal,” she says with a sniffle.

Great, now she’s going to cry.

Count to ten and breathe.

“She won’t say anything, but for what it’s worth, she’s been trying to get Connor to take a full-time job at Lila’s Place. He refuses. Connor thinks he can do it all.”

“But he can’t and that’s the fucking point.”

“Well, you need to make it your responsibility to talk to him. I know you didn’t want to but he’s falling apart in front of our eyes.”

“I see that now. Honestly, he didn’t look that bad on Friday. Maybe the twins kept him up over the weekend and he let Jess sleep.”

“Maybe…”

My anger dissipates because I know this is on me.

“I’ll fix it, babe. I promise.”

Pulling back out onto the street, the GPS announces we’re only five minutes away. My palms begin to sweat. I can’t believe I’m nervous to meet a little girl.

You’re afraid your life is about to change, of course you’re going to be nervous.

The neighborhood is nice; the houses are on the smaller side but all are well-maintained. All in all, it’s only a thirty-minute drive from the new house to here. After I park the car, April turns to me.

“Are you sure you’re okay with this?”

Bringing her hand to my lips, I kiss her softly. “I’m sure. Let’s go.”

“Hi!” a little girl calls out from the porch. I don’t think it’s the same girl from the mall the other day, though.

“Hi, Hannah!” April cheerfully greets her.

Hannah looks to be about five or six. She’s cute, a little chubby, with blonde hair and green eyes. She’s playing with Barbies and looks to be happy. I wonder what her story is—why she’s here.

“Mrs. Robinson is inside while Mia finishes her shower. She said to tell you they’ll be out in a few minutes if you got here first.”

April sits on the step next to her and talks to her about her dolls while I observe. From what April told me yesterday, it’s just the three of them here right now. Considering Mia has lived across the street, I’m not sure Hannah is going to be too happy to lose her best friend.

“You’re big and tall,” Hannah says, suddenly looking at me.

“I am. I used to play football in college.”

“My daddy was big like you, too.” I wonder what happened to him but I don’t have to wonder for long; she’s very precocious, like Hailey.

“He died last year in a fire. He was a firefighter. Mrs. Robinson says he’s a hero.”

“It sure sounds like Mrs. Robinson is right.”

“What’s your name?”

“I’m Jake and April is my wife.” She glances from me to April and back again.

“You’re almost a daddy, too.”

“Yes, I am, and I can’t wait.”

“Waiting is hard. I’ve been waiting for new parents for over a year. Mrs. Robinson says ‘
The best things come to those who wait.
’ So I’m pretty sure my new mommy and daddy will be really good.”

Fuck.

How the hell does April do this all day, every day?

Mrs. Robinson comes to the door. “Hannah, it’s your turn for a shower now. Mia will be out here in just a minute. She’s putting her shoes on.”

“No rush,” April tells her sweetly.

“Will you still be here when I get out of the shower?”

“We should be.”

“Good,” Hannah says, turning to me. “Can you watch my dolls? They need a daddy to protect them while I’m gone.”

Talk about projecting feelings. This little girl just wants to be loved and protected.

“It would be my pleasure,” I tell her as she gives me a quick hug and runs inside. That can’t be normal. Kids don’t attach to people like that so soon, do they?

“Wow.” The word comes out so softly, I’m not even sure I said it out loud.

“I know,” April concurs.

“These are just two little girls. There are kids like this all over the world. How does this even happen?” I wonder aloud.

“Unfortunate circumstances most of the time. Poverty, lack of birth control, lack of familial support, addiction, you name it. It feels good to make a difference in even one child’s life. Then you think about the millions of others out there you can’t help and it sort of takes that good feeling and flushes it down the toilet.”

“You’re amazing. No wonder you love your job.”

“Yes, I do, but I also hate it. I’m beginning to feel burnt out on sadness when I have no way to change it.”

This might be the first time I’ve ever heard her talk negatively about her work. I’d never be able to do it.

“You’re the strongest person I know. I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

We sit in silence for a few minutes and I can’t focus my eyes anywhere but on the memorial set-up in front of the house across the street. I can only imagine how hard it must be for Mia to come out here and see that each day—such a constant reminder of sadness.

“Hi, April!” Mia exclaims excitedly as she bounds outside the house. She’s wearing a light blue dress with white flowers, carrying a stuffed polar bear, and sporting black Chucks. I’m guessing the Chucks were her choice.

“Hey, Mia, how was your day?”

“Good,” she answers shyly, clutching her bear to her chest.

“Mia, this is my husband, Jake. He wanted to meet you and Tank.”

Tank? Who’s Tank?

“You did?” she asks me with big, bright eyes.

“I sure did,” I answer with a smile and she visibly relaxes.

“This is my bear, Tank,” she says as she wiggles him around in front of my face.

“Well, it’s nice to meet you both. What does Tank like to eat?” I ask, teasing her a little. If she’s going to even have a shot in this family she better know how to take a joke.

She giggles. “You’re funny. Tank doesn’t eat, he’s a stuffed animal. I think if he
did
eat, he’d probably eat Hannah’s Barbies.”

Now I’m laughing. She’s adorable.

“Is Hannah your best friend?” I ask, trying to keep her talking.

“Yup, since last year when she moved here. She was really sad then but she’s mostly better now.”

“Are you still sad?” April asks kindly.

“Yes, but I know I’ll see my nana in heaven one day, so that makes me feel a little bit better. Her funeral is tomorrow and Mrs. Robinson said she’ll take me and Hannah out for a special lunch with ice cream when it’s over.”

“You like ice cream?” I ask her, wondering what her favorite kind is.

She nods her head. “I
love
ice cream, even more than birthday cake.”

That’s funny, April loves cake and could totally do without ice cream. I’m an ice cream man myself.

“What’s your favorite kind of ice cream and cake?” April asks. This is so weird; we’re trying to get to know this little girl to see if we’d want her to be a part of our family and we’re talking about dessert.

“Vanilla with sprinkles, but I like chocolate cake with vanilla icing. That’s what I had for my birthday.”

“When is your birthday?”

“May second. I’ll be six next year, and so will Hannah.”

“Hannah’s five, too?”

Mia nods. “She’ll be six on June second. Our birthdays are super close.”

I wonder how many five- and six-year-old kids actually get adopted out of the foster care system. Probably more than teenagers but it can’t be anywhere close to the babies and toddlers. If someone as cute as Hannah has been waiting a year with no luck, it doesn’t seem promising.

“That has to be fun for you two to have birthdays so close together.”

She nods excitedly at April. “It is. We’re going to be best friends forever.”

I stand and stretch as my conscience and heart have a battle with each other. We can’t be the ones to separate these two little girls; they’ve been through way too much.

“Jake,” Mia calls, tugging at my shirt. She’s so tiny next to me, so I crouch down like I do with Hails sometimes so she can talk to me at eye level.

“Yes, Mia?”

“Tank likes you, he says you’re nice.”

“Well, tell Tank thank you very much. How about you, Mia? Do you like me, too?”

She looks me up and down and finally nods. “I do. Hannah said you were nice like her daddy used to be.”

April looks over at us and her eyes are misting over with tears.

“I think daddies have a special spot in their heart for little kids and that’s what makes us nice.”

“Your baby is lucky to have his mommy and daddy. He kicked me the other day.”

“He did? He kicks me a lot, too. I think that means he likes you.”

“Do you think so, April?” she asks excitedly.

“Yup, I’m sure Jaxson likes you, too.”

“That’s his name?”