Clallam Bay (A Fresh Start #2) (2 page)

Whatever was going on in my life quickly hopped in the backseat once Sonia pulled out pictures of wedding dresses. And after taking one last crack at the seating chart, we packed everything up and headed out to pile it all into her car just in time to catch my neighbor pulling in.

“I can have Jason talk to him if you want. See what his problem is,” Sonia offered, and I nearly hit my head on the trunk hood.

“God, no. Don’t do that,” I begged as he climbed out of the cab of his truck. Sonia and I both smiled and waved as if we weren’t just talking about him.

“Okay. Well, if you change your mind,” Sonia said after he disappeared into his house. She climbed into her car and rolled down the window. “You know where to find me.”

Stepping back, I watched her pull out of the driveway before heading inside.

I had just settled down to get caught up on my stories when I heard the rumble of thunder rolling in from over the ocean. Snuggling farther under my blanket, I looked out the window at my neighbor’s, knowing the time was coming for him to leave again. So it was no surprise when I woke that night to the sound of a screen door squeaking.

It only seemed to rain on days he left.

“So, do you get to see Mr. Coll a lot?” Kaylee asked from her perch beside my desk. Playing with the hem of her shirt, she toed the carpet. “Are you friends?”

I smiled at her small form, finding it quite cute how she’d been asking so much about him ever since he’d helped her.

“Mr. Coll works a lot, sweetie.” I told her what I had every other time before. “I don’t see him very often. But if I did I’m sure we’d be friends.” That caused her to look up and smile. I shooed her to her seat to get ready for quiet time.

We were ten minutes in when Alyssa burst through the door, exciting the classroom I’d finally gotten settled all over again.

“Oh my God. Did you hear?” she blurted then covered her mouth. Looking at me, her eyes widened before turning to the class. “You guys heard nothing,” she warned with a point of her finger. A cluster of little heads nodded, and Alyssa straightened her blouse, heading over to sit on the edge of my desk. “There’s been an accident.”

My heart jumped, and I thought back on the daily roll call making sure everyone was present and accounted for. I wasn’t missing any students that I could remember.
Oh God.
Was it one of Alyssa’s students? One of the parents? Another teacher?

“What? Who? Who was in an accident?” I asked, getting more antsy by the second.

“Not just who, but what. You know Kim McDaniels?”

“The music teacher?”

Alyssa nodded. “Mmhmm.”

“Of course. What about her? Was she in the accident? Oh, no. Is she okay?”

The look Alyssa gave me was grave.

“Oh God. What? She’s not okay? What, Alyssa? For God’s sake, tell me already!”

Checking to make sure the class wasn’t listening, we continued our whispered exchange.

“You know that big storm we got over the weekend?”

I nodded.

“Well, I guess the worst of it was out at sea ‘cause it capsized one of the crabbers.”

My heart sank.

“And Kim McDaniels’ husband was on it.”

A sadness settled over the classroom, quickly spreading like a fog throughout the town once the news broke. Not only had the sea claimed the life of Kim McDaniels’ husband, but all the men on board. The school closed. I was slowly losing my mind not having anything to do but sit and wrack my brain for the name painted on the side of my neighbor’s boat. For the life of me, I couldn’t remember what it was, if he crabbed, or hopefully just fished.

The walks I took along the harbor to help jog my memory only made me feel more out of my element, almost as if I were intruding on the ceremonious memorials that were often taking place. I witnessed a handful of them. Stood back and watched idly as single white roses were clipped from their stems and tossed into the bay. A tradition, I was told. The flower tops, they floated for a while, all gathering together in a cluster that represented the fishermen’s souls. And once they sank, the town’s mourning period was over.

Even though businesses reopened and school was back in session, it was still in the air. The sadness. The longing of the families who had lost their loved one. There was no putting a time limit on the pain they endured. Some came to the docks to cry. Others just stared, squinting out into the big, wide blue, but all of them prayed for the safe return of the rest of the boats. The whole community did. Myself included.

With the lack of sleep I was getting, I ate more than ever, and, as a result, had permanently paced a line in the rug from fridge to window. Every night I hadn’t woken to the squeaking of a screen door, I would look out the next morning in hopes I just hadn’t heard it. But his truck was never there. He was never there.

“I’m sure he’s fine. I mean, wouldn’t Sonia know if he wasn’t? She is his landlord,” Alyssa reminded me. “And you know that bitch would be hunting down family, grieving or not, if it meant getting paid on time.”

I kept my mouth shut where it concerned Sonia, even though Alyssa was right. Sonia was anal that way.

“She’s probably charging you both out the ass for this view, too.”

I didn’t know about charging me out the ass. All I knew was it was worth every pretty penny I had to pay. It also didn’t hurt that my parents opted for half. At least for the first year. After that, I was on my own. Then it’d probably be a different story.

Alyssa took off later that afternoon, leaving me to watch the sunset alone on my front porch swing. But with everything going on in my head, I couldn’t enjoy it because what if my neighbor were dead? What if he didn’t have family to mourn him? Maybe I should have clipped a flower for him. Just in case.

Turned out my worries were all for nothing. I heard his truck before I saw it putter over the small hill in our shared driveway. My heart sped while his engine stalled and then restarted before he made it to the sparse gravel alongside his house.

My first instinct was to run up and give him a hug and make sure he was okay. But when he waved, I waved. And that was that. He disappeared into his house and I hadn’t seen him since.

*

“Well, this is a good thing, right? I mean, he’s still alive. Yay!”

As much as a part of me wanted to argue with Alyssa’s reasoning, I couldn’t because who cared if he continued to be aloof or not? He was still alive and that was good, no matter how I looked at it.

It wasn’t as if he owed me anything. It wasn’t like I expected him to take time out of his day to stop by, maybe say, “Hey, I’m back, so you can stop worrying now.” But I couldn’t help wanting him to.

It was silly, really, putting this all on him when I could have taken the time out to go over there, maybe bake him a yay-you’re-still-alive bundt cake—I had just bought a new pan. But I didn’t.

Who knew. Maybe he was waiting for me to check in on him. It wasn’t like anything was stopping me. Except for me.

“Maybe I should make him dinner or something. Just take it over to say, ‘Hey, there. Super glad you’re not dead. Here’s some chicken.’”

Picking at her salad, Alyssa nodded.

“You think he likes chicken?”

“It’s chicken. Who doesn’t?”

“Well, you think he’d like Italian chicken? It’s where you cook the chicken in Italian dressing.”

“I know what Italian chicken is,” Alyssa said, scowling up at me before going back to picking at her salad.

“I’ve been craving it. And I always make too much anyway. But it’s not for everyone. What if he doesn’t like Italian dressing?”

“It’s chicken,” Alyssa repeated. “And all men like chicken, Hailey. All kinds. I’m sure he’ll be beyond ecstatic to have your excess bird meat.”

I smiled, happy to have made a plan. Now all I needed was to pick up the ingredients after work, bake the chicken, and I would be ready to make the first move as the friendly new neighbor—just a little over a month too late.

As expected, the rest of my day moved at a slug’s pace. I had to slow myself down in order to not rush through the afternoon lessons. When the bell rang, I was the first person out the door—right after all my students had been picked up, of course. By six I was standing outside his house, working up the courage to knock.

As the sun started to set in the October sky, I rapped my knuckles lightly against the chipped wood. When he didn’t answer, I did it a little harder. I waited so long the plate warming my hands cooled in the wind. And the moment I could no longer feel my fingers, I gave up and left the plate on his porch.

*

The next morning, I woke to look out the window and found the plate missing from his porch. I checked my porch, but found nothing other than tracks of dried mud the size of my own feet.

After I scrubbed the dishes, I grabbed the broom and stepped outside, right into the embrace of an unexpected Indian summer. Breathing in the surrounding pine, I shielded my eyes from the shimmer of the water before putting broom to wood and getting down to it. I had just about finished when a shadow cast over the steps.

“Mornin’.”

Startled, I tightened my grip on the handle of my broom and a sharp piece of wood pierced my skin.

“Shit,” we both hissed at the same time I dropped the broom and he caught it. Propping it against the siding, he sat my plate on the step to grab my hand. I jerked back by reflex when he lightly ran his thumb over the site of the splinter, but his grip held me still.

“You got tweezers?” he asked, the deep tenor of his voice vibrating from his hand to mine. The pads of his fingers were rough and callused, yet unexpectedly gentle as he rubbed soothing circles around my palm.

No longer trusting my voice, I shook my head, sucking in a silent breath when he ducked down and took my finger into his mouth. Heat radiated through me from the warmth of his tongue. I was too shocked to stop him once I felt the light scrape of his teeth, and my entire body went numb.

All we’d ever done before this moment was wave hello and now my finger was in his mouth.

With a quick nip, the pain was gone before I could even flinch. But I did anyway, grabbing hold of his upper arm at the same time. I tried to focus on my breathing instead of his lips. How they pouted. How pink they were compared to his skin.

His tongue ran over the superficial flesh wound, and I tightened my grip on his bicep when he sucked in before releasing my finger to spit the shard out onto the ground.

“Better?” he asked, running the pad of his thumb over the broken skin.

No longer feeling it stick like the first time, I nodded.

“Good. Now if only my morning wood was that easy to get rid of.”

My reaction was between a cough and a laugh. His wide smile triggered my own, and I took back my hand, promptly crossing my arms over my chest.

“Good one,” I said, nodding at the ground. Unable to stop smiling, I squinted up at him. “That was a good one.”

“You liked that, huh?”

I nodded, tucking a piece of hair behind my ear, and smiled down at the ground again.

Yeah, I liked that.

“So, are you the one to thank for the dinner last night?” He pointed to the plate.

“Yeah, that was me.” I gestured to myself. “Hailey.”

“Well, it was delicious. Just sorry I wasn’t there when you dropped it off. Would have been better warm. But it was good either way.”

“Good. I’m glad you liked it.”

“Yeah. Been forever since I had a home-cooked meal. Really hit the spot.” Rubbing his stomach, he held out his hand as if he’d just remembered his manners. “I’m Coll. Sorry. Probably should have led with that instead of …” He nodded down at my hand.

“No, it’s okay. Thanks to your fast thinking I still have my finger.”

“How else would you have cooked for me again if I hadn’t saved it?”

“Right. Exactly.”

The wrinkles at the corners of his eyes deepened with his smile, and I noticed the color for the first time. Brown as his hair but with gold specs. Same as mine.

As the sound of the waves hitting the cliff replaced our chatter, he shoved his hands in his pockets and started to back away. “Well, I gotta get going. But it was good to finally meet you, Hailey.”

“Yeah. You, too.”

“Just wanted to stop by and drop that off.” He tipped his head toward the plate. “Let you know it was the best chicken I ever had, warm or not. And you can cook it for me anytime.” He winked, and I flushed for the hundredth time since the start of our conversation.

“Yeah. Sure. Anytime.”

With a nod, he took off for his truck. I watched after him until he hopped in the cab. Once he was out of sight, I picked up the plate and headed into the house. Already planning my next meal and unable to wipe the smile from my face.

“Hold up. He did what with your finger?” Alyssa asked. Putting a hold on painting her nails, she absentmindedly blew on them.

“Put it in his mouth.”

“He put your finger in his mouth,” Alyssa repeated.

Sonia rolled her eyes. “That’s what she just said. Or weren’t you listening?”

Holding up her open palm toward Sonia’s face, Alyssa shushed her with her fingers. “So now, you were saying, your finger …”

“Yep.”

“Was in his mouth.”

“Yes. But it was nothing. It was just so he could suck out the splinter. That’s all.”

“But your finger was in his mouth though.”

While Alyssa sat back and dreamily pondered that fact, Sonia and I continued folding paper cranes for the reception tables. I was on my one hundred ninety-fifth and my fingers were killing me. The wounded one, especially.

“I just can’t believe he stuck your finger in his mouth. I can’t get over it.”

Sonia sighed loudly. “Obviously.” Giving up on her crane, she turned to me. “So, are you planning on sleeping with him?”

Both Alyssa and my mouths dropped as we looked up at Sonia.

“What? I’m not the only one thinking it,” she said, and a blank expression crossed Alyssa’s face before she turned to face me as well.

“Well, are you?”

Narrowing my eyes, I chucked one of the cranes at Alyssa’s head. “That’s none of your business.”

“It is if we’re your true friends,” Alyssa argued, encouraging Sonia to join in.

“Yeah. What she said.”

I looked from one to the other in disbelief because of all things, knowing the details of my sex life was what they chose to agree on.

“First of all, knowing who I choose to invite into my bedroom does not a true friend make.”

Alyssa huffed, mumbling down at her nails. “Okay, Yoda.”

Sonia fell back in her chair, giving up on yet another crane. I was beginning to think I’d end up doing all one thousand of them all by myself.

“Look. I’m only asking because—”

“She’s a nosy bitch,” Alyssa interrupted, and Sonia gave her a death glare.

“No. I’m asking because I’ve seen how it works. You sleep with him, he breaks your heart and—”

“You pack up your bags and leave, taking the rent with you.”

“Shut up, Alyssa. That’s not what I’m saying.”

“Well, if you’re so worried why did you offer to have Jason talk to him for me?” I asked. “Why would you encourage it? Why not warn me off then?”

“Because then, I didn’t think you were interested. I just wanted to make sure you got along and were used to each other by the wedding.”

“Why do we need to get used to each other by the wedding?”

“Because he’s Jason’s best man, and I didn’t want it to be all awkward while you two were walking down the aisle.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah. So, see, if you sleep with him and it doesn’t work out …” Sonia shrugged.

“So you’re just being selfish then,” Alyssa chimed in, waving her wet nails in the air.

Sonia scowled at her. “And just how is that selfish?”

“You’re willing to sacrifice a possible lifetime of your friend’s happiness for just a day of your own.”

“I would hardly consider a lifetime of casual sex happiness.”

“Then you’d be doing it wrong.”

Sonia disengaged with an eye-roll and picked up a piece of paper to attempt another crane. She threw it back down halfway through. “Are you gonna help or what?” she asked Alyssa.

“What,” Alyssa said.

Sonia raised her voice. “I said, are you going to help or what?”

“And I said, what. Besides, my nails are still wet.” Alyssa attempted to blow Sonia off along with the wet paint on her nails. But Sonia wasn’t having it.

“Then why are you here?”

“Moral support for Hailey, bridezilla. Why else?”

“I’m hardly that bad.”

“I beg to differ.”

“How so?”

Mindful of her nails, Alyssa picked up one of the cranes. “A thousand paper cranes, Sonia,” she said then dropped it back down onto the table. “One thousand paper cranes.”

While the two bickered back and forth, I reached for another piece of paper, but Sonia was quicker. When she yanked it off the pile, it sliced me right below the site of the splinter, and I yelped.

“Oh, shit. Sorry, Hailey.”

“Quick! Somebody call Coll!” Alyssa yelled and then laughed. “Call Coll. Get it? ‘Cause she hurt her finger.”

Sonia fought a smile, claiming Alyssa sounded like an idiot bird squawking, which only made Alyssa laugh harder.

Chuckling myself, I noticed something moving in my periphery and glanced out the window to find a leggy blonde entering my neighbor’s house.

An unexpected heat flashed through my body, and I turned back to the table to resume folding my one hundred ninety-sixth crane as if nothing was wrong.

Because nothing was.

*

Over the next couple days, I did the very best I could to steer clear of my smooth-talking neighbor. Sonia was right. He was a casual kind of guy, and I just wasn’t that kind of girl. And I didn’t trust myself enough not to try and talk myself out of that fact. He was too good at what he did. Made me feel too much for him to expect so little. Though really, what he was expecting wasn’t little at all. While I wasn’t a virgin, I wasn’t necessarily an experienced lover. To me, sex was more than just sex for the sake of sex. To me, sex meant something. It was meant to be special.

So far so good, though. Mission avoidance was working out pretty well. Until it wasn’t anymore.

“Hey, there. Need any help?”

Ass up in the air, I briefly closed my eyes, mentally preparing over the bags of groceries in the backseat. I really didn’t need any help, but I also didn’t want to be rude. It was my curse.

“Uh, yeah. Sure.” Crawling out of the car, I handed Coll three of the five sacks. “Thanks.”

“No problem.”

He followed me inside and into the kitchen, where I had him put the bags on the counter. I did my best to avoid touching, looking at, or even talking to him while I put away the groceries. But I could still feel his eyes on me pretty much the whole time. He made it really hard to ignore him.

“Your students draw these?”

I looked over my shoulder at the pictures hanging on my fridge. “Uh, yeah. How’d you know I was a teacher?”

“I have great deducting skills.” He pointed to where one of the kids wrote “To Miss Wells. The best teacher in Clam.” “I also saw you on that field trip with your class. Remember?”

“Oh, right. How could I forget? Kaylee sure hasn’t.” I gave him a smile, and he returned it just the same.

“Yeah, she seems like a sweet one.”

“She is.”

He nodded. “So you like being a teacher?”

“Yeah, I love it,” I somewhat fibbed.

“And you knew you always wanted to be one?”

I shrugged. “For the most part. What about you?”

“What about me?”

“Did you always know you wanted to be a fisherman?” I asked.

He smiled. “Nobody wants to be a fisherman. It’s just something you end up doing.”

“Like you’re born into it? Kind of like a birthright?”

“You could say that.”

“So you don’t like it?”

“Hell, no.”

“Then why do it?”

His smile looked more like a grimace this time. “Like I said. It’s just something a guy like me ends up doing.”

A guy like him? What the hell was that supposed to mean? I wanted to ask but didn’t since he seemed a bit agitated by the subject. Turning my back instead, I gave him some privacy while I put the boxed mac ‘n cheese away. By the time I remembered my manners it was too late. When I turned to offer him a drink he cut me off.

“Did I do something?”

I gave him a look. “Do something?”

“Yeah. To piss you off?”

“No. Why?” I asked. The picture of calm but with my heart in my throat. I had no reason to be pissed at him, which he knew. Truth be told, I wasn’t pissed. Just disappointed. Mostly in myself.

Leaning back against the counter, he pressed his palms into the tile. “No real reason, I guess.” He shrugged. “It’s just …” He paused. “Ya know, just forget I said anything.”

“Okay.”

Nodding at the ground, he sniffed before pushing off the counter. “Well, if you’re all set here …” He gestured around the kitchen.

“Yeah, I’m good. And thanks again. I—”

“Anytime.” He cut me off again, heading for the door, and I did nothing to stop him. There was nothing to stop him for.

But as the hours passed, I felt more and more guilty for the way I’d handled things. It wasn’t his fault he was so smooth and therefore completely irresistible. It wasn’t his fault I felt the way I did. He was just being friendly. Flirty in a way he probably was with all the girls. It was obvious he didn’t need another one hanging around, fawning over his every word. No. What he needed was a friend. A friend who fed him food, not flattering lines of bullshit.

Headlights shining through my window caught my attention. He was leaving, and who knew when he was coming back. If he was even coming back at all.

Swallowing my pride, I got up and took the leftovers out of the fridge, piled them onto a microwaveable plate, then covered it with Saran Wrap for the short trek over to his house. Without bothering to knock, I left the plate on his porch in hopes of patching up what damage I had done and picking back up where we left off before. As friends.

*

“So, he said he just wanted to be friends? Those exact words came out of his mouth?” Alyssa asked.

I sighed, having to go over this for the millionth time today. “No. He didn’t say that. He didn’t really say anything. He didn’t have to. I just know. It’s best we stay friends.”

“Is this because of the blonde? Because she could have been anybody. A sister. A cousin. Just a friend.” Alyssa eyed me. “Besides, you said yourself you haven’t seen her since. In fact, you haven’t seen anyone of the female persuasion since, so what’s the issue?”

“The issue is I highly doubt he’s looking for a real relationship.”

“And you are?”

“Well, given the alternative.”

“Exactly.” Dropping her sandwich, Alyssa pointed at me. “You think you’re ready to get raw and real with this guy, Hailey. But you’re not. Not really.” Gesturing widely with her hands, she sounded exasperated. “What we’re talking about is fun. You’re holding out for his issues. And let me tell you, Hailey, he’s got issues. A lifetime subscription full of ‘em. They all do.”

“Who’s they? Fishermen?”

“Fishermen. Men in general. You name it. Pretty much everybody on God’s green Earth does. Everybody but you.”

What was that supposed to mean? Did she seriously think I didn’t have issues? “Oh, I have issues.”

“Like what?”

“Like, it’s impossible for me to have a one-night stand.”

“That’s not an issue, Hailey. It’s a mindset. Try again.”

“Okay. Well, I woke up one morning to find my cat had been run over. She was flat as a pancake. My dad had to scrape her off the street.”

“And you watched?” Alyssa asked in disgust.

“Well, yeah.”

“Then I take it back,” she said, picking up her sandwich. She waved it at me before biting off a mouthful. “You just might have more issues than all of us.”

I was in a funk all the rest of the afternoon. Alyssa had dragged up some less than stellar memories, and I couldn’t seem to shake them or this foul mood.

Along with my poor cat Buttons, her calling my inability to do casual sex a mindset was on my mind the rest of the day. Maybe she was right. Maybe I could sleep with my neighbor as if it were nothing.

My stomach was in a series of knots that rolled up into one big ball when I saw him sitting on my front porch swing, clean, empty plate in hand. My decision that I could casually sleep with him regressed back to the beginning stages of deliberation. Could I do that? Did I want to do that? Did he? Of course he did. He was a guy and this was sex we were talking about.

Parking the car, I waved once I got out. “I see you found the plate.”

“Was it supposed to be hidden?”

Shaking my head, I climbed the steps. I stood back as far as I could, leaning against the porch rail. “You really think I’d hide anything from you?”

The look he gave me told me he knew I would and did.

“So, was it as good as the chicken?”

“Better, actually.”

“Really?”

“No, not really. But it was just as good. I bet all of it is.” He looked me up and down once then smiled. “Your cooking, I mean.”

Setting the plate down on the swing, he leaned forward, clasping his hands together and resting his forearms on his legs. He looked out over the bay as he rocked back and forth. “Anyway, I just came by to drop that off. Tell you thank you for my last meal.”