Clearwater Romance (10 page)

Tessa’s first day of married life, seemed to speed past in a blink. She’d convinced Cameron she needed to gather things from her apartment before they left for Clearwater. Unsurprisingly, he wouldn’t agree without the condition he carried her up the steps to her apartment citing the fact that she was on strict orders no steps.

It was the only time he had touched her since their wedding ceremony. She ached for his touch, and that did little to alleviate the demand. After the wedding, a part of her wished he’d complete the claim. She wanted to be his wife in more than just name. She promised herself in time she would be, but for now she wouldn’t let it ruin the limited time she had left with him.

She lay curled in bed with a cup of tea as he packed the last of her things. Of all the things they were taking, very little were his. He’d packed a small bag to keep at the cabin for when he was on leave. That way he could fly straight to her without the delay of coming by his apartment.

Her eyes began to grow heavy, but she fought it with all she was. She had such limited time with him that she wanted to cherish each and every second. Sleep could wait until she was alone.

“You’re getting tired, why don’t you sleep?” He added the last of the stuff on the bed to the suitcase and zippered it.

“Sleep can wait.” She wrinkled her nose, but when he raised an eyebrow and his jaw flexed, she sighed. He got points for not parroting the doctor’s orders, but she conceded defeat and took the final sip of her tea. “Fine. Will you lay with me?”

“I don’t think…” He shook his head, lifting the suitcase from the bed and sitting it next to the door.

“Don’t think, just do. Please…you’re leaving soon. I just want to feel your arms around me.” She hated that her voice sounded weak, with a touch of begging, but she couldn’t help it. She felt so alone, and it would only grow worse when he left. She was desperate for his touch, wanting to have it before it was too late.

He nodded, coming around the bed, to get in beside her. He didn’t bother to undress, and probably planned to humor her until she slept and then head to the sofa. “Okay. You need to sleep; we have a long day tomorrow. Jordan’s going to pick us up at the Jackson Hole airport to take us to Clearwater.”

Setting her empty tea mug aside she curled her body into his, and rested her head against his shoulder. Holding him tight, she tried to memorize every part of the experience—the way his body felt, the smell of his cologne, the thump of his heartbeat drumming steadily beneath her hand. She completely supported his career—it made him who he was—and she’d never ask him to give it up, not even for her, but she wished he could stay with her. Being a military wife took strength and sacrifice, and she never realized just how much—and they hadn’t even been married twenty-four hours. Maybe it wasn’t something everyone could do, but she’d go to the moon and back for him.

“Is everything okay?” He ran his fingers lazily over her shoulder, rubbing in small circles.

She tilted her head up meeting his gaze, and gave him a smile but she knew it didn’t go to her eyes. Her stomach was in too many knots. “I’m fine, still reeling from the last few days.”

He kissed the top of her forehead. “You know I’ll do everything in my power to come back to you.” A hint of anxiety thickened his voice.

She knew that and she knew it wouldn’t stop her from worrying either. The look on his face said he was thinking about his parents. He always said he never wanted to widow a woman, not after watching his mother grieve. But she doubted he realized that was his own grief talking—because he lost his dad, too.

“I know you will. What happened with your parents isn’t going to happen to you. You’ll come back to me…to us.”

“I just don’t want you worrying about me.” Anxiety filled his gaze, as if memories of his past were coming to light and he felt doomed to have them played out again, but this time instead of with his parents they would be with her.

“Cam, I’ve always worried about you. This deployment will be no different. But in the end—in a few short months—you’ll be back home. Everything’s going to be fine…” She brushed her fingers along his jaw. “I have no doubts you’ll come home to me.”

* * *

As long as Tessa was in his arms, he didn’t want to move. It was almost as though she was the missing piece to him. Her body fit snug against his as if she belonged there.

If things had turned out differently for his parents, maybe he would have made her his years ago. The worry of leaving her a widow was too much for him to bear. He still despised the idea, but she needed him and her immediate problems trumped other possibilities. His Tess deserved the world and more than he could give her.

His wife
.

In just seventy-two hours she’d be in Clearwater alone and he’d be about to deploy. For the first time in his military career, he seriously regretted his orders. He didn’t want to leave her, not in her condition. When he deployed this time, he would be leaving behind family.

Tessa relaxed against Cameron’s tight body, his arm around her shoulders and his fingers gliding along her collarbone. His friend Jordan drove while Jordan’s wife, Chloe played tour guide, pointing out different aspects of Clearwater. It had been a long day. All she wanted was to get to the cabin, and be alone with Cameron. In two days, he’d be gone again and while she should be used to his deployments—it felt different this time.

“I’m sorry Tessa. You had a long trip and here I’m rambling on about our town. It may seem like there’s not much here, but it’s a nice small town. I’ll do my best to see that you enjoy your time here.” Chloe explained.

“It’s fine Chloe. It’s a beautiful town, thank you for having me.” She wanted to be friendlier, but she didn’t have it in her. The sun might just be setting, but for her it was two hours later, and they had been on the go since early that morning. Between arriving at the airport two hours early to go through security, and three plane transfers she was exhausted.

“We’re almost there, and you can rest. We’ve already stocked your cabin with supplies you’ll need.” Jordan announced, glancing in the rear view mirror at them.

“Thank you.” Cameron told him. “We really appreciate it.”

She watched out the window as the small town went by, the rod iron light posts were just springing to life as they drove towards Winterbloom Bed and Breakfast. Shops were beginning to close for the night, but one in particular caught her eye, Tiny Treasure Baby Store. She’d have to make a trip there once she was off bed rest. She couldn’t wait to begin shopping for baby clothes. For the first time since finding out she was pregnant, real excitement thrummed within her. What would she have? A son or a daughter?

Deep in thought, she didn’t even realize they pulled in front of a cozy cabin. A warm light glowed inside, making the place inviting and the lake view was stunning especially with the sun sinking low in the sky. The building even had an ATV parked alongside the walkway to the cabin.

“Welcome to your temporary sanctuary. The ATV is so you won’t have to walk to the main house if you wish to come over. For now, until you’re off bed rest, and unless it’s an emergency Tessa please use the phone and call us. I also wrote down our cell numbers, they’re inside on the table. Add them to yours and keep it with you at all times. You never know when you might need us.” Chloe explained while Jordan helped Cameron with the luggage.

“Thank you for everything.” She gave Chloe a smile, truly grateful for all she was doing, and then turned towards the cabin.

The men dealt with the luggage quickly enough and Cameron came to her, wrapping his arm around her waist. “Thank you both for everything. I’m going to get her settled, we’ll see you tomorrow.” He led her inside, and she heard Jordan start the SUV, back up and drive away.

The inside of the cabin had a homey feeling to it. The warm brown couch dominated the living room, with a large flat screen television hanging on the wall, and a small fireplace catty-corner to the sofa. A creamy white shaggy throw rug covered cherry wood floors to designating the section as the living room. A small table set further in, and just beyond that, a galley style kitchen, and a hallway that she assumed lead to the bedroom.

“Come on. Let’s get you in bed, I’ll unpack.” With his arm around her waist, she was left with no choice but to go with him. The bedroom was done in a warm gold, the fluffy white comforter that contrasted beautifully with the dark walnut furniture. “Get out of those clothes, and into bed.”

She did as he asked, too tired to argue. She folded her clothes and set them on the chest at the edge of the bed, and crawled in between the sheets. “You must be as exhausted as I am. Leave the stuff, come lay with me.”

“I’m fine.” He told her, but she could see the traces of weariness around his eyes.

“Cameron, we don’t have much time left together before you have to leave, please…” She hated that there was a hint of begging in her voice. She shouldn’t have to beg her husband to come to her, to lay with her. They were married, even if he didn’t love her, she still wanted him. For the time being just feeling his body against hers was enough. She didn’t know how long that would be enough, but while it was she wanted to take advantage of each opportunity she could to enjoy it.

“I know…” He sat on the edge of the bed, watching her. “You’ve been quiet today, do you regret this?”

“Regret what? Getting pregnant? Marrying you? Coming to Clearwater?” She shook her head. “I regret none of it. My unborn child will be healthy because of you. I’ve always believed everything happens for a reason…maybe
us
is the reason.”

* * *

The movie ended and Tessa was surprised to find herself still awake. Neither of them had slept much the night before, and neither of them seemed in a hurry to sleep now. They cuddled together in bed, their empty popcorn bowl had been pushed to the side. Their time together was ending much too quickly. In the early morning hours, he’d catch his flight back to North Carolina and report for duty.

Her heart beat frantically with the thought of him leaving. She hated herself for being weak, for thinking she needed him to get through it. She might not
need
him, but she wanted him. They were very different things, but both left her body crying out for his touch.

He nudged her chin up, his eyes dark and thoughtful as he studied her. Her breath caught in her throat when she thought he’d kiss her. “My Tess, I’ve never seen such apprehension in your eyes as I do tonight.”

“I’m going to miss you.”
She tried to smile when all she wanted to do was cry. She went through this with each deployment to a degree, but normally he wasn’t there to see it. He was always so busy attending to last minute preparations that she only got a portion of his time. It was made worse because after the arduous trip to get here, he refused to let her see him off at the airport. She never missed a deployment or a welcome home. “When you board that plane, you’ll have no one there to say goodbye.”

“I’ll know you’re safe. Plus I’ve always liked our private goodbyes better.” He lowered his head, their lips met and desire coursed through her. He pulled her lower lip into his mouth, sucking on it, before letting it go and sliding his tongue deep within her mouth. His hand moving from her chin gliding up the side of her face to tangle in her hair, drawing her closer to him. She could almost taste his reluctance even as he ended the kiss. He rested his forehead to hers and their noses brushed. “If it helps when I walk out the door tomorrow just picture me boarding the plane instead. Yours is the only goodbye that matters to me.”

“I’m coming with you…to the airport.” She leaned forward pressing her lips to his again, unwilling to waste their last few hours together. Her hand slipped under his shirt, running up his rock hard chest, feeling every toned muscle with her fingertips, as she tried to pull it up and over his head.

A knock sounded on the cabin door.

“I’ll get it.” Cameron told her pulling away from her. He rolled off the bed, and paced over to the door. Pausing, he glanced back. “You’re not coming to the airport, you’re on bed rest.”

She rose up on her elbow meeting his gaze head on. She was going, even if he didn’t like it. “The short drive will be fine. I won’t be driving, I can rest in the backseat. I need to see you off.”

He didn’t reply, just walked out to answer the door. Moments later Chloe entered, bringing a tray with what looked like chocolate cake. Tessa looked beyond Chloe expecting Cameron to be right behind her, but he wasn’t there.

“I brought you chocolate cake.” She smiled holding up the tray. “Don’t worry he’ll be back soon. There was a call for him at the main house…one of his men. I guess he couldn’t get through to Cameron’s cell phone.”

Weird.
Tessa reached for his cell phone that lay on the side of the bed with her own, and low and behold, it was off. In all the time she had known him she never knew him to turn his phone completely off. Vibrate yes, but never off. She turned her attention back to Chloe. “Thank you. Sorry I can’t get up, I promised Cam I would stay in bed. I better keep my promise if I want him to not fight me going to the airport with you guys in the morning.”

Chloe stepped towards the bed, setting the tray on the nightstand. “Are you sure…about tomorrow?”

Tessa didn’t even try to keep the frown from showing. She didn’t know Chloe very well, but she thought if anyone she’d have Chloe on her side. “I have to…”

Why can’t anyone understand that I need to see him off? I’ve always seen him off and just because I’m pregnant isn’t going to be the reason I don’t this time.

* * *

Cameron stepped out of the small office at Winterbloom to find Jordan in front of the television with a beer in hand. Jordan seemed to be adjusting well to civilian life, and for the second time since he found out Tessa was pregnant, he questioned his career.

“Everything okay?” Jordan muted the television.

“Seems one of my men has gone AWOL I’ve alerted the MP’s that if he’s found to detain him until I’ve returned tomorrow.” He frowned. The kid was young, but it was a stupid Marine who ruined their career.  “How do you like civilian life?”

Jordan eyed Cameron before answering. “At first I was lost, my whole life was the Marines. It wasn’t my choice to leave, and I was bitter, but now I have Chloe, and I’m happier than I’ve ever been. Are you thinking about it?”

It was clear that by
it
Jordan meant civilian life. “I don’t know…maybe. A wife, a child, they don’t go well with our line of work. I don’t want to make her a widow. I might not even make it back for the birth.” He was treating Tessa’s child as if it were his own, and he wanted to be there for the birth. He hadn’t told anyone she wasn’t pregnant with his child, not even Jordan and Chloe. As far as anyone knew, she carried his baby, that is why they married so quickly.

“I know what you’re going through. You were one of the few that shared my beliefs, about family and the Marines, but Tessa’s a strong woman, she’s going to be fine. If you stay in, she’ll make an excellent Marine wife, you won’t have to worry about her. She’s got the strength, and backbone to handle it.”

“I better get back to her. See you at oh six hundred.” Outside he took off in a steady jog, around the lake, his mind on the uncertain future. Would he really be willing to give up his career as a Marine? After fifteen years of devoted military service, maybe it was time to give it up for Tess.