Complete Works of Wilkie Collins (2067 page)

Miss Clack
(
sternly
). A properly-constituted mind doesn’t dwell, Mr. Blake, on a trouserless father. Dear Mr. Godfrey, use your eloquence to persuade Rachel! The Mothers’-Small-Clothes is particularly rich in material just now. I may truly describe our struggling sisterhood as being quite overwhelmed with trousers!

Godfrey
(
pathetically
).Too true! too true!

Rachel.
My dear Drusilla, I don’t understand these things. If you like to start the institution, you have my full permission to do so.

Miss Clack
(
clapping her hands
). Oh, thank you, dearest! Oh, how happy you have made me! (BETTEREDGE
enters with the second bottle of champagne, and makes straight for
MISS CLACK.) Yes, Mr. Betteredge. One more little glass to drink success to the new institution.

Betteredge
(
confidentially
). Dry, as before, miss. (
He fills her glass, and then fills the glasses of the rest of the company.
)

Miss Clack.
May I propose a toast? May I, without impropriety, place myself, for one little moment, in a public position? Success to the Branch-Mothers’-Small-Clothes-Conversion-Society!

Franklin
(
repeating the toast
). Success to the Branch-Mothers’-Small-Clothes-Conversion-Society! (
aside.
) And may the wind be tempered to the shorn fathers! (BETTEREDGE,
who has been waiting his opportunity of speaking to
FRANKLIN,
now approaches him, and speaks confidentially.
)

Betteredge.
I say, Mr. Franklin, when are you going to show Miss Rachel the Moonstone?

Franklin
(
starting
). Good heavens, I had completely forgotten it! Rachel! (RACHEL
approaches him.
) Prepare yourself for a great surprise. You have heard of your uncle, the Colonel?

Rachel.
I have some vague remembrance of his behaving badly to my poor mother, and of his being celebrated as the possessor of a famous diamond.

Franklin.
The Colonel is dead, Rachel, and the famous Moonstone is left to you by his will. The official announcement of it is among your letters in that drawer. And here is the diamond itself. (
He offers the box to
RACHEL.)

Rachel
(
amazed
).What!

Betteredge
(
very earnestly, aside to
RACHEL). Don’t take it, miss!

Rachel
(
taking the jewel-box from
FRANKLIN). Not take it? (
To
FRANKLIN.) What does he mean?

Franklin.
Betteredge is superstitious —

Betteredge
(
indignantly interrupting him
). I’m nothing of the sort, Mr. Franklin! I only say the wicked Colonel’s diamond will bring ill-luck to Miss Rachel and to everybody in the house. Is that superstition? It’s nothing of the sort — it’s reason founded on experience! (
They all laugh.
RACHEL
opens the box.
GODFREY, MISS CLACK,
and
MR. CANDY
all look at the diamond.
)

Rachel.
Oh, heavens! the lovely thing!

Godfrey
(
softly
). Exquisite! exquisite!

Miss Clack.
Vanity! vanity!

Mr. Candy.
Carbon — mere carbon!

Rachel.
How shall I have it set? As a bracelet or as a brooch? Look at the wonderful light in it — the lovely radiant glow, like the light of the harvest moon!

Franklin
(
showing her how to hold it
). It takes its name from that light, Rachel. Bring it here, into the dark corner, and hold it as I tell you, and the glow will be brighter still.

Rachel
(
delighted
). Come, Drusilla! Betteredge,
you
may see it too. (RACHEL
and
MISS CLACK
follow
FRANKLIN
to the back of the hall.
)

Betteredge
(
alone, in front
). I am much obliged to you, miss. A little of that unlucky jewel goes a long way with
me!
(
In a lower tone.
) I’ll mark it on my almanac. The wicked Colenel’s vengeance begins tonight. (
He goes out.
) (MR. CANDY
and
GODFREY
are left together in front.
MR. CANDY
looks at his watch.
GODFREY
observes him.
)

Godfrey.
You are not going yet?

Mr. Candy.
I must go soon. I have an interesting case in the town. A London doctor has heard of it, and is coming to see the patient by the night express.

Godfrey.
Is the malady serious? (
Shrinking from
MR. CANDY.) Nothing infectious, I hope?

Mr. Candy.
Make your mind easy. It’s a case of somnambulism. A lad, who has never been known before to walk in his sleep, has surprised everybody by turning sleep-walker at the age of seventeen.

Godfrey.
Very remarkable! Have you discovered the cause?

Mr. Candy.
I think so. Like Mr. Blake there, my patient was not accustomed to eating supper, and he was tempted to try the experiment by some friends. He eat heartily, and he afterwards drank spirits, which he was not in the habit of doing either. There was no drunkenness, mind! After one glass of grog each the party rose from table, and adjourned to another room for a little music. The lad followed them, and sang too. Some strangers were present at the concert. He was introduced to them, and made his bow with perfect politeness. Conversation followed the music. Our young fellow joined in, and began to talk in an odd, absent way, mixing up his own affairs with the subject under discussion. Most of the party thought the poor wretch must be a little tipsy. One of them, rougher than the rest, gave him a shake, by way of sobering him, I suppose. He jumped up with a scream of terror, and looked about him in the wildest confusion. In plain English, he woke!

Godfrey.
What! had he been asleep all the time?

Mr. Candy.
Fast asleep and dreaming, with his eyes open!

Godfrey.
After only eating supper?

Mr. Candy.
No! no! after eating when he was not accustomed to eat, and drinking what he was not accustomed to drink. That makes all the difference. When he recovered his composure, he was asked if he remembered singing with the company, and being presented to the strangers. He stared in astonishment; he no more knew what he had been doing than you did before I told you of the circumstances.

Godfrey.
You astonish me!

Mr. Candy.
Oh! the thing has happened before. A case of sleepwalking, under similar circumstances, occurred in the last century — the case of Dr. Blacklock, the poet. A morbid condition of the stomach produced in Dr. Blacklock. A morbid condition of the stomach produced in my young man. The brain affected by it in both cases. There’s the explanation, to
my
mind! We shall hear what the London doctor says. If you’ll excuse me, I’ll just tell them to put my horse to in the gig. (
He goes out by the hall door.
RACHEL
leads the way back to the front of the stage, followed by
FRANKLIN. MISS CLACK
stops at the library-table, and takes up an illustrated newspaper.
)

Rachel
(
to
GODFREY). Oh Godfrey! you don’t know what you have missed! A perfectly unearthly light shines out of the diamond in the dark! (
She turns to
FRANKLIN.) What shall I do with it? (
She looks round.
) I’ll put it in the cabinet.

Franklin.
Don’t go near the cabinet! I have been varnishing it, and it’s not dry yet.

Rachel.
You put it away for me. (
She gives the diamond to
FRANKLIN. GODFREY
retires, and talks with
MISS CLACK
at the library-table.
)

Franklin
(
going to the cabinet
). I wonder whether the door locks? (
He tries the key.
) Like all old cabinets, the lock is out of order, of course. Rachel! the lock’s rusty, and won’t act.

Rachel.
What does that matter?

Franklin.
Are you aware that the Moonstone is valued at ten thousand pounds? Seriously, Rachel, am I to put such a valuable jewel as this in a place that won’t lock up?

Rachel.
You won’t find a place that
does
lock up, belonging to me. I hate the worry of keeping keys! What use are they here? Is my house an hotel? Are my faithful old servants thieves? Don’t make a fuss about nothing! Do as I tell you!

Franklin
(
opening the drawer in the cabinet
). There it is, in the third drawer from the top. (
Aside.
) I must find a safer place for it than this — Betteredge will help me. (
He closes the drawer and shuts the door of the cabinet, then examines the varnish carefully.
) I haven’t smeared the varnish, have I? No! The surface is as smooth as glass, and the effect will be beautiful to-morrow. (MR. CANDY
re-enters.
)

Rachel.
Have you been ordering your gig, Mr. Candy? You are not going already?

Mr. Candy.
It’s late, Miss Rachel.

Rachel
(
looking at her watch
). So it is! (
calling to
MISS CLACK). Drusilla, shall we say good-night?

Miss Clack.
Certainly, Rachel. (
She takes leave of
GODFREY,
who remains at the library-table, looking over an album of photographs.
RACHEL
shakes hands with
FRANKLIN
and
MR. CANDY.
At the same time
BETTEREDGE
enters with a kettle and a spirit-lamp. He is followed by
PENELOPE
with the bedroom candles.
PENELOPE
lights the candles at a side-table.
)

Rachel
(
shaking hands with
MR. CANDY). Mr. Candy, take something before you go.

Mr. Candy.
Thank you, Miss Rachel. Good-night, Miss Clack.

Miss Clack.
Good-night, Mr. Candy. I shall be at the town the first thing to-morrow, to start the new institution. (MR. CANDY
goes to the supper-table and stands there mixing and sipping his grog.
PENELOPE
hands
MISS CLACK
her candle.
MISS CLACK
fixes her eyes sternly on
PENELOPE’S
smart cap ribbons.
) Thank you, Penelope. Don’t suppose I am admiring your cap ribbons — far from it! (
She turns to
RACHEL.) Good-night, love. (
She kisses
RACHEL,
who wishes her good-night, and enters her room on the left.
PENELOPE
has previously gone out at the back, offended by
MISS CLACK’S
remarks on her ribbons.
MISS CLACK,
with a dignified bend of her head to
FRANKLIN,
ascends the stairs which lead to the gallery.
)