Confessions of a Litigation God: A Legal Affairs Full Length Erotic Novel (13 page)

“I’m
hanging up, Marissa. Don’t come over here. You’re drunk,
and it’s my weekend so you’d be trespassing. I’ll
call the cops if you show up.”

I disconnect the
phone before she can say a word and set it down beside me on the
couch. I don’t feel angry toward her for disrupting my evening.
I feel the same I always do… disgusted and annoyed I have to
put up with her forever and ever. Because she’s Gabe’s
mother, she unfortunately has a spot in my life.

Standing up from the
couch, I head into the kitchen and grab a beer from the fridge. I
twist the top off and lean against the counter while I take my first
pull on it.

Not unsurprisingly,
my thoughts drift to Mac. I wonder what she’s doing right now.
Is she home, alone? Out with her roommate? Possibly out on a date?
It’s within the realm of possibility that she could be out with
another man. She’s beautiful and smart… She would have
men lined up for blocks just to have the chance to have a drink with
her.

I don’t like
the surge of jealousy that rises up when I think about that. Surely,
she wouldn’t go out with someone. Although we didn’t talk
about exclusivity, I just sort of assumed Mac is that type of woman.
The type that only wants one man in her life.

For a moment, I
think about calling her. Just to casually check in, see how things
are going. In fact, I could probably make a pretense of calling about
the
Jackson
case with an idea I have. Of course, I don’t
have an idea, but I’m sure I could come up with something
pretty quickly.

I walk back into the
living room and grab my phone from the couch. Flipping into my
contacts, I pull her up. A photo of her face shows up… asleep,
head turned to the side. I took it in Chicago after maybe the second
or third time we had sex. She drifted off into a light sleep, and I
got up to go to the bathroom. When I got back, the peacefulness and
delicate beauty of her face caught me off guard. I stared at her for
an unreasonably long time, and then grabbed my phone.

She was splendidly
naked on the bed, and I could have taken any number of photos of her
for my private viewing later. But I didn’t. Just one photo…
a close up of her face, and I’ve studied it a time or two.

My thumb hovers over
her number, undecided on whether I should call her.

Then I ask myself…
am I really calling because I want to further a connection with her,
or am I calling to soothe my own ego?

The answer is clear
because I am an ego-driven man, so I throw my phone down and walk
back toward my bedroom. I’m just going to have to put Mac out
of my mind.

I can’t keep
thinking about her because when I do, it’s nothing but the most
utterly fantastic thoughts. There’s not one thing that turns me
off about her that I can think of, other than she loves reality TV.
Outside of that, she is truly what could be considered a fantasy
woman, and the more I dwell on that, the more I might be tempted to
seek something more with her.

And more than
anything… I cannot let that happen. That phone call with
Marissa validated my position. Once you’ve been in love…
deeply and irrevocably in love, and you have that love obliterated by
the one person you thought you could trust above all else? Well,
let’s just say that leaves a mark on your soul.

I will never let
that happen to me again. I will never go through that pain…
that humiliation. I will never be that stupid.

Thus, there can
never be anything with Mac more than what we have right at this
moment.

“You didn’t
have to be such a prick to my client in there,” Cal Carson
seethes at me as we step out of my large conference room and into the
marbled lobby of my firm.

Glaring back at him,
I say, “From one prick to another, right Carson?”

The animosity
between Cal Carson and me is so palpable that the air is thick with
tension. It has nothing to do with this case we just settled. No, our
tension started a few years before… when he used to be my best
friend.

Best friends for
fourteen years… through undergrad, law school, best man at my
wedding, and so on.

It all fell apart
and the “tension” started precisely when he fucked my
wife, and confessed his sins to me. I promptly kicked his ass and let
hate fill my soul where he is concerned. It was no consolation that
my wife was already fucking around on me and that I knew about it. No
consolation that our marriage was over in my mind, and I had already
planned on leaving her. If anything, it was a million times more
painful that Cal betrayed me with her, because in hindsight, while I
could see Marissa doing that… it was just beyond comprehension
that someone like Cal would do that to me. He was just so loyal and
morally upstanding. I still don’t understand it, but I really
don’t want to either.

Needless to say,
that whole “best friend” thing doesn’t exist
anymore, and I am left to suffer his presence. It kills me that his
law practice and mine collide over and over again, since we are on
opposite sides of the playing field. We’ve had several cases
against each other over the last few years and while we manage to
treat each other with cold civility most of the time, every once in a
blue moon, my anger will get the best of me and I’ll be a real
prick during our dealings.

“Gentlemen,”
William McDaniel says soothingly, in an effort to mediate. He is,
after all, the mediator for our case today. “The deal is done,
so let’s just shake hands and call it a day.”

Cal sighs and starts
to stick his hand out, because of course, he would be the bigger
person.

He should be the
bigger person after what he did.

Cocksucker.

But then something
catches his attention over my shoulder and he exclaims, “McKayla!”
with pure delight radiating from his eyes.

Turning around, Mac
is walking into the lobby, her satchel slung over her shoulder. It’s
the first time I’ve seen her since we parted ways Saturday
morning and as expected, my body viscerally reacts to her. Heartbeat
accelerated, palms itching, dick twitching.

She looks amazing.
She’s more casually dressed today in a pair of wide-legged,
gray trousers and a dove-gray silk blouse, complimented with a wide,
patent-leather black belt and those fuck-me, mile-high black heels
she wears all the time. Her hair is pulled back into a ponytail that
hangs low on her neck, which only showcases the graceful arch of her
neck.

Cal pushes past me,
intentionally hitting my shoulder, I’m sure, and walks up to
her. My blood pressure spikes when I see her smile at him warmly, the
same delight showing in her eyes. They look like two people that have
a fucking crush on each other or something.

How in the fuck
do they even know each other?

I watch as they
speak for a few moments, their words traveling crystal clear over the
marble flooring. The fucker asks her out to lunch and my eyes narrow
as she accepts, telling him what a good time she had with him on
Saturday.

Motherfucking
cocksucker!

I’m going to
fucking pound him into the dirt. It’s no less than he deserves,
and he’s stepped over a line now that I won’t look past.
I did that once with him. Not doing it again.

Not with Mac.

“Excuse me,”
I mumble to William as I walk away, and head toward Mac and Cal.

When I reach them, I
take her elbow in a firm grasp. “If you’ll excuse us,
Carson, I need to talk to McKayla about an urgent matter on a case.”

Without waiting for
a response from him or her assent, I push her through the lobby, back
down the main corridor, and straight for my office. I’m not
that gentle with my pushing, the anger welling up in me like a
hurricane.

She was with fucking
Cal Carson on Saturday? When I had been contemplating calling her?

When we get to my
office, I open the door and push her in.

She pulls free of my
hold, spinning on me in anger. “What is your problem? Pulling
me out of the lobby and manhandling me to your office like you own
me?”

“What the fuck
are you doing with Carson? You were with him Saturday?”

Mac takes a deep
breath and lets it out slowly. I can almost visualize her counting
down from ten to calm herself. “Not that it’s any of your
business, but I met him in the law library and we had coffee. He
helped me out with a Memorandum of Law.”

Okay… now I
can relax.

Coffee. That’s
all it was. Coffee.

I’m so fucking
relieved, I almost laugh out loud but then decide against it when
Mac’s eyes narrow at me. “Where were you this weekend
since we’re… you know… all sharing and shit?”

Yeah, I’m not
sharing. Not sure why she thinks this is a sharing moment for me.
Besides, I’m still pissed that she spent time with Cal and
apparently is going to lunch with him. “None of your business.”

“What? You
demand to know what I was doing, but you don’t share what you
were up to?”

“That’s
right,” I sneer at her viciously, when what I really want to do
is kiss her. “I’m twisted that way. Stay away from
Carson. He’s bad news.”

Mac’s face
goes red, and she starts to take a step backward.

Oh, hell no. That
won’t do at all.

My hand shoots out,
catching her around the waist. I reel her in quickly but her hands
come up and slap against my chest, halting her momentum. She tries to
push out of my grasp and I let her struggle for a moment then I let
her go, because I only want her in my arms willingly.

“You can’t
tell me what I can and can’t do. It’s a two-way street. I
have no say so in your plans, then you have no say so in mine.”

I can’t help
myself. I’m in full-blown asshole mode. “I do when it
comes to Cal Carson. He’s off limits.”

“Off limits?”
she practically yells at me, and then drops her voice immediately,
sliding a hesitant gaze toward my door. She hisses at me when she
says, “You want to talk about off limits, how about you taking
Lorraine out to dinner tonight? She’s in her office right now,
getting all dolled up for your date with her. Let me make the same
proclamation you’re making about Cal. She’s off limits.
Stay away from her.”

Quite a mouthful,
Mac.

“Are you
jealous?” I ask with a smirk, trying not to laugh. I had
completely forgotten about my dinner meeting with Lorraine tonight.

“Doesn’t
matter if I am or not. You say I can’t see Cal, well, I say you
can’t see Lorraine. Cancel with her.”

Okay, that’s
not so funny anymore. I can’t cancel with Lorraine. It’s
a business meeting that has to happen tonight, as I can’t let
that woman run loose around my law firm another day. She’s
wreaking all kinds of havoc around here, and Bill and I are ready to
put an end to it. Thus the reason for me taking her out for a dinner
meeting.

“Not going to
happen,” I tell her firmly.

“What? You
won’t even consider my feelings?” she asks in a small
voice.

“Not where
this is concerned. It’s none of your business.” I know
that’s such a fucking dick thing to say, but again…
still pissed she seems to like Cal and she’s having lunch with
him. I’m not giving in on this one.

“Then Cal is
none of your business. We’re even.”

Fucking Cal. I
hate that motherfucker.

Lunging at her,
letting fury rise a little too high, I grab her shoulders and pull
her in close to me. My voice is deadly when I say, “You’re
trying my patience, Mac. Words don’t seem to work on you. Let
me try something else.”

I kiss her with so
much energy and pent-up frustration, it’s an almost orgasmic
release. My tongue goes in swiftly, roaming around her mouth,
stroking her. She immediately melts into me, her body sinking into
mine, and I get a full-blown erection, which pushes into her stomach.

I pull her closer
and kiss her harder, my fingers digging into her shoulders and I’m
sure that’s going to bruise tomorrow. When Mac groans into my
mouth, I feel like screaming, “I’m king of the world,”
but I’m smart enough to keep quiet, knowing she would not
appreciate that.

When her fingers
curl into my shirt, I start to lean down to pick her up, intent on
depositing her on my desk and fucking her quickly. But that doesn’t
happen because Mac tears herself away from me.

I stand there,
looking at her, while my chest heaves with the exertion I was pouring
into that kiss. I want her so bad right now that I’d promise
just about anything to have her.

But I can see that
look in her eyes. She’s getting ready to deny me, and that
makes my blood boil.

“Enough,”
she says accusingly. “Stop doing that to me. I’m not your
puppet.”

“You are if I
tell you to be.” This is me… trying to get back control
of the situation.

I think for a moment
that statement might cause her to cry, but she does nothing more than
suck in a lungful of air and let it out slowly. “Listen…
I won’t see Cal if that is what you want, but I want the same
thing with Lorraine. I don’t want you taking her to dinner
tonight. Are we agreed?”

Okay, she’s
clearly missing the part where I’m in control. I call the
shots. This is sex… sex only. She has no say-so in what I do,
and yes, I realize with absolute clarity that I am being a
hypocritical asshole. I know I am. I know I’m asking something
of her that I refuse to give back. It’s wrong, wrong, wrong and
I know it.

But I’m still
an asshole, and I’m sticking to it.

Any psychologist
worth his merit would say I’m sabotaging this thing I have with
Mac, because I’m too fucking scared to give in to it.

I’d have to
agree.

I try one more time
to get us back on track. Back to just sinful fucking and no
questions. “I’m taking Lorraine out to dinner tonight. I
can’t cancel. But then I’ll be over to your apartment
after.”