Confessions of a Prairie Bitch (13 page)

Conning our way into a Hollywood party in 1974. I wore a $1,000 gown while my publicity-machine dad donned a $2 tux.

What the hell are you doing here?
Michael was shocked but happy to see me at the party.

Never wrestle with Melissa Gilbert. She’ll put you in a headlock and make you eat dirt!

My all-time favorite picture of Melissa and me: She has that expression on her face because I have just shoved an ice cube down the front of her shirt. (She did it to me first!)
Photograph by John Wiltshire Photography

Since my boobs were the biggest of the teenagers’ on
Little House
in 1977, I won Gladys’s gold lame swimsuit. Here I show off the goods as Melissa stands by, green with envy.

BFFs celebrating my fifteenth birthday on the set at Paramount Studios.

Ever the prankster, Michael helps me cut my cake.

Palling around with “Percival.” Celebrating with Steve Tracey at the
Little House
Christmas party in 1980.

With my mother and the late comedian John Deavon at a salute to Casper the Friendly Ghost (a.k.a. Mom) in Hollywood.

You can take the girl out of the prairie, but you can’t take the prairie out of the girl. Post–
Little House
, I continued to be cast in period pieces, including the TV movie
I Married Wyatt Earp
with Marie Osmond.

Trying to shed my innocent
Little House
image by playing a tramp on
Fantasy Island
in 1980. Yes, that’s Eve Plumb (a.k.a. Jan Brady) as my mom!

Visiting the real Walnut Grove in 1992.

J’adore the French…and they love me! A Nellie poster from 2009.