Conundrum (13 page)

Mandy and Samuel behaved graciously in the face of my mother’s cruel accusations
about “their” side of the family
. Mandy came to the defense of her parents when I told them what my mother had said about them—that they had neglected my grandparents, among other acts of familial treason.

“That’s so not true!” Mandy said, with her father patting her arm,
urging
her to calm down. “Pop, you and Mom were the only ones who c
ared for them before they died.” She turned to me. “My folks came over daily, made sure they had around-the-clock care
, food in the fridge
.
My other uncles couldn’t give a hoot.
At one point
Pop
hired a wonderful nurse—what was her name, Pop?”

“Trina,” he said. “She stayed with them the last year—on their pull-out sofa. A big heart, that woman.”

“Trina. That’s right.” Mandy’s attorney voice
took front stage. She was presenting evidence to her jury of one—me.
“Where in the world did your mother come up with such bullshit?—excuse my French.”

I waved my hand in dismissal. “That’s okay.” I could tell Mandy was a person that, once she got going, was probably hard to
stop
. Good litigator material, no doubt.
“My mother’s like that. Quick to find fault.”

“But she turned you kids against us—why?”

I shrugged.
“I think she didn’t want us finding out the truth about her marriage. That she and my dad were
n’t
as happy as she wanted us to believe.”

Samuel added
,
“I remember Nina
and your mother had some words. The two of them didn’t get along well.”

Mandy jumped in to elaborate.
“My mom didn’t like your
mom
. Thought she was manipulative, pushy. There was a fight, right, Pop?”

“A minor thing,” he said with a frown
, studying Mandy
. “Arguing over childrearing. Ruth thought Nina was spoiling you
and Becka
, letting you stay up as late as you wanted, watching old reruns on TV. Something like that.”

“Seems kind of petty,” Mandy said.

Samuel shrugged, bowing out of taking sides. “But maybe Lisa’s right
. When I
went
to visit your dad
when he was first diagnosed
,” he said to me, “your parents put on a pretense of living together. But your dad
later
took
me aside and told me. They’d been living apart for many months.”

“
Really?
Did he tell
you he’d had an affair?”

My uncle thought for a moment. “
Not in so many words.
But he said he was living in an apartment in Hollywood, that he couldn’t take living in the house with Ruth, with the way he was feeling. At that point, he was just starting his chemo and radiation, and spending more time in the hospital than out. Your mother acted as if everything was fine and put on quite a show for Nina and me. But I could see the pain
in Nate’s eyes—
and
not just from the cancer. His whole world was crashing down on him. It broke my heart.”

When Samuel’s voice choked up, I
looked closer and
saw his eyes fill with tears.

“We don’t have to talk about this if you don’t want to,” I said. “When are our dinner reservations?”

Mandy looked up at the wall clock. “Pop, we should get ready.
Lisa
, aren’t you starving?”

“Yeah, I’m getting hungry.”

Samuel stood and Nathan jumped up from the table.

“Are we going to Gino’s? Ple
e
ea
se
?” Nathan tugged on Mandy’s arm
so hard she nearly toppled.

“Nate! Not so hard. Yes, we’re going to Gino’s. Now
,
let’s get you washed up.” She took her son by the hand and led him to the bathroom. Samuel turned to me
,
and his voice was kind and sincere.

“
I’m so happy you’ve come to visit us. It’s been too long.”

I nodded. “Yes, it has.” I gave him a hug
,
and we gathered up sweaters and purses and toys for the restaurant.

On the way down the stairs, Samuel
turned to me. “I remember when your folks were dating. Your dad was looking to join the Merchant Marines, and your mother would come over every weekend and help
my mother
in the kitchen.
Ruth wanted to get married to your father, more than anything.
Who could blame her?
Your dad was handsome, smart, gent
l
e. But he wanted to go to college and couldn’t afford it. Your mother kept promising him that if he’d marry her, her folks would help pay.
She put a lot of pressure on Nate, and my mother thought Ruth was an opportunist, trying to bribe Nate into marrying her.”

“Your mother didn’t like her.”

“No
,” he said almost apologetically, as if saying something so harsh m
i
ght hurt my feelings.
“
And she thought it suspicious that Ruth would make such promises of financial assistance when her own father was a
union electrician
and didn’t earn all that much. How would they be able to help?
”

“What did you think?” I asked as we went out the lobby doors to the street and the balmy New York evening.

Samuel measured his words. “Your dad joined the Merchant Marines to get away from her, from the pressure. He could earn money for college without asking for handouts. Then, right before your dad was ready to ship out, after his training, she told him she was pregnant.”

“What?” I stopped on the sidewalk and my family stopped too. “With Raff?”

Mandy had been walking in front of us, with Nathan pulling her along, eager to get to the restaurant. “What are you two talking about? What am I missing?”

Samuel waved her on
with a gesture that said
“I’ll fill you in later.” Mandy shrugged and resumed her lead. I saw the sign for the restaurant on the corner of the next block
.

I repeated my question with a lowered voice as we continued walking. “Was she pregnant with Raff?”

“This was two years before Raff was born. But it
backed
Nate in
to
a corner. Back then, you got a girl pregnant, you married her. Your father wouldn’t dare shame her or her family.”

“So they got married?”

“Right away. They had talked of
marriage
, but your dad had been undecided. Wanted to wait until his stint in the service ended, to see if their relationship had lasting power. Now, he had no choice. They couldn’t get the large hall they wanted for the reception, but they did have a nice wedding, with dozens of relatives from both sides. Your mother looked stunning
,
and Nate actually seemed happy.”

“You guys coming in?” Mandy asked,
while
little Nathan yank
ed
on the heavy door to the restaurant.

“We’ll be just a minute. Go on
ahead
,” Samuel said.
He drew closer to me
,
and I leaned in to hear his soft voice.
We moved away from the door so other patrons could enter. Samuel’s face grew serious. “
After your dad left overseas, he found out the pregnancy was a false alarm.”

“Imagine that,” I said with some sarcasm before I could catch myself.

Samuel nodded in understanding. “
She claimed she miscarried after the eighth week, which is quite common
, you know
. But your dad always wondered if that’s what really happened. Frankly, I think your mother wanted to make sure Nate married him before he left, in case he had a mind to forget her
during his travels.”

“So, not a great way to start a marriage.”

“No,” Samuel said. “But we shouldn’t make Mandy wait. We’ll talk some more later.

And
talk
we did. For the next few days,
while
eating, taking in the city and the sights, and more eating, I learned everything I could about Nathan Sitteroff.
The story my uncle painted
of
my father’s childhood was grim and revealing, but he kindly told all in a
n
honest and sincere voice
, conjuring up a story in my head
that tugged at my heart
.

Chapter
8

Nathan
is
five years old when his father dump
s
him off at the local child services. The Depression
,
in full rage in 1931,
causes
Mel Schumacher
to lose
his job as a tailor in a haberdashery shop on Westchester Avenue in the Bronx.
Having
two ol
d
er children
—Judith and Aaron
—whom he
can
barely feed,
he convince
s
his wife,
whom he refer
s
to as
a useless
,
lazy bitch, that the youngest ha
s
to go.

By the time he has been shuffled around from place to place,
Nathan remember
s
little about his parents and siblings. The orphanages and
a
doption agencies ha
ve
their hands full, and
placement and adoption
records
a
re poorly kept. Worse, the stipend issued to foster parents, although meager,
is
enough to tempt the
dregs
of humanity to offer a spare room—which
,
in Nathan’s case, often prove
s
to be a mattress on a floor, or a pile of
flea-infested
blankets in the corner of a room, which he share
s
with three or four other mishandled children.

Nathan remember
s
his father as a
lanky
man with thick bushy eyebrows and a continual scowl. But
he
pushe
s
from his young mind Mel Schumacher’s other unpleasant characteristics. Not until he relocate
s
his father nearly thirty years later
does
he encounter a man so repulsive and vulgar that Nathan refuse
s
to believe this was the same man that used to buy him Hershey’s chocolate bars every Friday evening after dinner at the local soda shop.
The horror of those four years of being dumped in one crowded, filthy apartment after another never le
aves
Nathan. Samuel, five years younger, only
spends
two years in the foster home system with Nathan
—joining him later—
and ha
s
no memories at all of being shuffled from family to family
.

The first time Nathan
lays
eyes on his younger brother
is
when the two-year-old
is
dropped off at the apartment Nathan shar
es
with a Romanian family that d
oesn’
t speak any English. He
doesn’t
know he ha
s
a younger
brother
until the agency worker t
ells
him to take Samuel’s hand and watch over him.
The agency,
committed
to keeping siblings together, f
inds
it hard to
place both boys
as a unit
and so t
akes
whatever
accommodation
s
are
available. And that usually mean
s
the worst places on their lists.
But what choice d
o
they have in such dire
times
? They c
a
n’t allow a two-year-old and a seven-year-old to wander the streets, searching trash cans for food, as the many squatters and vagrants d
o
.

Over the next two years,
Nathan
and Samuel
are
placed and removed from
v
arious
homes
,
where the
foster parents frequently scream at each other
and
at the children,
and
succumb to alcoholism, illness, depression, and
—
on occasion
—
death.
Without any warning
or explanation
,
Nathan and Sam
are
plucked from an apartment and dragged across neighborhoods, only to stand at the looming door of yet another fearful foster home.