Courting Buggy: Nurse Hal Among The Amish (9 page)

She took a tight grip on the seat and hopped. Jim
grabbed her arm to steady her until she turned around and perched.
“Good job, Nora,” he praised.

A mile from the Rogies farm, the Lapp family found
themselves in a line of buggies going to the same place they were.
The wind billowed the dust up into John's buggy.

Tootie coughed. She pulled a hanky out of her green
dress pocket, put it over her nose and gave a haughty sniffle.
“Inhaling all this dust can't be healthy. I don't know how you
Amish do this all the time.”

Emma patted her hand to soothe her feelings. “We are
just used to it is all.”

John pulled into the Rogies's pasture parking lot.
Jim pulled in beside him. Daniel and Noah got out of the buggy .
They unhitched the two horses and turn them loose in a pen by the
barn. The horses trotted to the full hay manger and wedged in among
the other horses.

Most of the congregation had already arrived. Men
gathered in one area of the yard. The teenage boys leaned against
the barn, and teenage girls stood near the front porch giggling
behind their hands about the boys. The smaller school age boys and
girls stayed in their groups. The three ministers were by
themselves, working out which one would speak first, second and
third and discussing what their sermons would be about.

The Lapp women entered the house and walked down the
aisle between the benches to kitchen. The bench wagon was parked by
the barn. The men put their black felt hats on the now empty
shelves. They spent the idle time talking, each with an eye on the
ministers.

Finally at eight-thirty, Bishop Bontrager led the
other two ministers to the house. They sat in the three chairs up
front that faced the congregation.

The young girls sat on the women's side of the aisle.
The women and smaller children up to the age of nine sat down in
front of the girls before the men came in. The oldest men came
first, and the others entered the house according to age down to
the younger men. Cooner Jonah Rogies went outside to call in the
teenage boys. The boys comb their hair and dusted off their
trousers before they filed inside.

“
Page two hundred and twenty,” announced the
song leader, Lawyer Jeffrey Peifer. So nicknamed because he had
some legal knowledge. There was a hushed stir as everyone picked up
a songbook and searched for the right page. Lawyer Jeffrey began
the song
Salve Regina,
and
everyone joined in.

The morning sun slanted in the windows, casting its
warmth on Tootie. She enjoyed singing so she tried to hum along.
She hated it that she couldn't sing the words, but she didn't
understand German.

Before the song ended, her mind flitted like a
butterfly in a marigold bed, darting from one thought to
another.
The bench is hard.
How am I ever going to stand sitting here for
three hours? Wonder what they fixed for lunch at a worship service?
Sure hope there's some food I can eat that will agree
with my poor digestive system.

Deacon Yutzy read scripture in High German as
Tootie stared at a black widow spider descending on a web attached
to the bench in front of her. Just watching the large spider made
her shudder in disgust. She hated creepy bugs.
Amish women should be better housekeepers than this. Anna
Rogies should have done a better job cleaning, especially when she
knew she had a lot of people coming for the service.

Tootie wiggled her shoe under the web. She
watched as the spider inched back up toward the broad backed woman
in front of her.
Oh, that poor woman. The
spider might bite her.

The spider crawled on top of the bench. Tootie leaned
forward and raised her hymn book. She came down with a hard swat,
missed the spider and clobbered the heavy set woman's behind,
making a loud splat that resounded throughout the room just as
Deacon Yutzy sat down and Minister Luke Yoder, Margaret Yoder's
son, stood up, ready to give the opening sermon.

The whole congregation looked around, trying to see
what made the noise. Hal turned red. She was dumbfounded that her
Aunt Tootie, out of the blue, hit a Plain woman in the back for no
reason with, of all things, a hymn book. That embarrassment turned
to horror when she realized the woman was, of all people, Stella
Strutt. Stella twisted around and gave Tootie a very harsh stare
then an equally mean glare at Hal. She said dummkopf sharply in
German and looked like this assault was proof that Hal's queerness
ran in her family.

Hal snatched the hymn book away from her aunt. She
hissed, “Aunt Tootie, why did you hit Stella Strutt?”

Tootie whispered, “I'm very sorry. I was trying to
kill a black widow spider. I was afraid it was going to bite her. I
missed the spider, and now it has gotten away.” She studied the
floor around her feet, looking for the insect to make sure it
wasn't on her. She blushed when she realized Stella was still
glaring at her. Tootie said, “I'm so sorry, Mrs. Strutt. I tried to
stop a spider from getting on you. It was a black widow. That's the
worse kind you know.”

That was enough to suffice for the moment. Stella
shifted around on the bench to face the front.

Hal patted Tootie's arm to get her attention. She
whispered, “Perhaps you should just sit quietly now before you get
into anymore trouble. You don't want to get us kicked out of here,
do you?”

“
Of course not, Dear. Never that,” Tootie said
meekly.

On the other side of Tootie, Nora leaned across Emma
and whispered, “Tootie, this is their church. Act like it.”

“
I said I was sorry,” hissed Tootie.

Minister Yoder crossed his hands in front of him,
taking in the commotion in row four on the women's side. “Is there
something wrong, Stella Strutt?” He asked.

The elderly woman puffed up like a toad. “It is all
right now. The English woman behind me hit me in the back with her
hymn book. She says she is sorry so I forgive her,” Stella said in
a tone that didn't sound forgiving.

Even more curious now, Luke turned his attention on
Hal. “Was there a reason your aendi hit Stella Strutt?”

“
Jah, a black widow spider crawled up its web
and right behind Stella on the bench. Aunt Tootie was afraid it was
going to bite her. She meant to kill it, but her aim was bad,” Hal
said with a heavy sigh.

“
I see,” Luke said. “So can I start my sermon
now?”

“
Aunt Tootie has promised to pay close
attention to the front of the room from now on,” Hal said
solemnly.

“
Gute to know. Instead of what I was going to
preach, I am reminded of a parable that might fit this moment.
Today I will recite it in English. It is about a spider web in a
household that had a mother with several daughters. The mother had
the daughters take turns cleaning the house from top to
bottom.

One day, the daughter in charge of cleaning that day
saw a spider web. It hung in the top corner of the door that went
from the kitchen to the living room. It was up high so she could
not reach it. She decided she was not going to worry about it. She
had all she wanted to do to make the house look tidy when it was
her turn to clean. She was not going to all the hard work to make
the house look immaculate. After all with such a large family, the
house would soon need cleaned again. If she was lucky, it would be
one of her sisters turn. That sister could take the spider web
down.

When company came to visit, a woman noticed the
spider web. She said to another woman someone should do something
about that web instead of letting it hang there for all to see.

The other woman said in order to take care of the
problem someone needed to kill the spider. The two women stood
under the web looking for a spider but did not see one. Another
woman came from the kitchen. They pointed at the web. She was
amazed that there would be a web in this clean house. Someone
should do something about the web she told the other two. They all
agreed and just walked away.

Six months later, the worship service was in that
house again. The house had been cleaned from top to bottom except
for the spider web which now held the dead spider.

One woman took the time to look for the web she saw
at the last Sunday service in that house. She whispered to her
husband, as she nodded above them, that the web was still there.
Someone ought to do something about that web she said to her
husband, hoping he would take the hint. Another man stopped to
speak to her husband, and the men went outside.

One woman pointed the dusty web out to another. Soon
all the women took turns saying something should be done about that
web. One woman pointed out, they were at the Sunday service in
someone else's house. What could they do? None of them had a dust
rag. It bothered all the women now to look at that web, but look at
it was all they did.

The women of the house were really bothered by the
web after they heard all the talk that day that cast aspersions on
their cleaning. By the time all the company left that evening, the
tired woman and her daughters had forgotten about the web. All the
talk didn't bothered them enough to remember the web again.

Another six months went by. The Sunday service was
again at that house. First thing the visiting women did on the way
to the kitchen was to look up. Each commented she was bothered that
the same old cobweb still dangled there after all this time. They
all agreed that something should be done about that web.

One said, “We need to get rid of that cobweb.” A
couple of them went for the broom and dust mop. Others asked the
woman of the house for dust rags. They stood looking up at the
cobweb, complaining at the poor sight it made but doing
nothing.

A deacon came over to see what the women were doing.
His wife mentioned the cobweb to him some time ago. He thought by
now one of the women in the house had taken care of the problem.
“What's wrong?” He asked.

His wife said, “We are looking at that cobweb. It
bothers all of us to see it still there. Someone should do
something about it already.”

The deacon looked at the dusty web. “How long has
that cobweb been there?”

“
For over a year,” replied his wife.

“
That long,” he said. “All of you women have
fussed about the web that long, but not one of you cleaned it
down.”

All the women burst forth at the same time with
excuses. They wanted to do something about getting rid of the web.
They gave reasons why they didn't, including the woman who owned
the house and her daughters. They each ended their excuses with
they agreed someone really should do something about that web.

The deacon took the broom out of his wife's hand and
a dust rag from a woman. He threw the dust rag over the broom
straws and lifted the broom up to the door facing. One swipe took
care of getting rid of the web. The deacon was able to do something
about it, and it took all of four seconds. We should all know not
to leave something that we think is important to be done for
someone else to do when we can do the job.

As for what happened today, anyone that sees that
spider in here during the service or his web under a bench, I say
do not wait for someone else to take care of it. Do what Nurse
Hal's Aendi Tootie attempted. Take care of the problem right away
yourself, before that spider bites someone or builds a web.”
Minster Yoder said, “Now for the silent prayer. Und wann dir einig
sin lasset uns bede.”

At the minister's bidding, the congregation slipped
off the benches onto their knees. After they were seated again, Hal
vowed to keep a better watch on Tootie. She kept only partial
attention on Deacon Enos Yutzy. He read scriptures about Aquila and
Priscilla's lives as tentmakers and how they moved about the
country.

When he finished, he turned the preaching over
to Bishop Bontrager for the main sermon. “Dear Brothers and
Sisters, blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.
Let us pray
The Lord's Prayer
together. Und wann dir einig sin lasset uns bede.”

Everyone went from the benches to their knees to pray
the prayer out loud. After the Bishop said amen, they rose and sat
again.

During Eldon Bontrager's sermon, Hal heard familiar
giggling. She looked beside her. Beth was on the bench, but Redbird
was missing. Hal leaned over to look in the aisle. Mortified, she
saw her redheaded toddler crawling toward the bishop. What more
could this family do to interrupt this day's worship service?

Redbird made it as far as the bishop's feet. She sat
up and giggled which caused a few snickers from the congregation.
The bishop stopped talking. He stood very still and watched the
child. Redbird pulled on his shoestring and untied his shoe.
Giggling, she grabbed his pant leg, raised herself up and patted
his knee. She smiled up at him, wanting his attention.

Bishop Bontrager smiled kindly at the tot and lifted
her into his arms. He gave her a hug. “That what you wanted?”

Redbird cooed at him.

“
If it is all right with you, Redbird, I will
finish my sermon so we can call dinner. You must be hungry.” The
bishop turned to his congregation. “There is a saying. Nothing
proves one's character quite like his kindness to children and
animals. When we go about our daily life remember that saying when
you are with a child or taking care of your animals. Remember not
only the people you walk around see how you act, but God is
watching you.

Proverbs tells us train a child in the way he should
go, and when he is old he will not turn from it. Redbird is here at
the worship service to be trained in our ways. I do not want to be
the one to do anything that would turn her away from us, including
telling this tiny child she can not interrupt my sermon.”