Cowboy Love on Hold [Love: The Cowboy Way 1] (8 page)

“You sure you’re okay?”

Brandon nodded. “Couldn’t be better.”

He threw on the clothes and crossed the room, giving Wade a pat on the shoulder as he drew level with him on the way to the front door. Kimber stood in the hall in her nightgown, just as confused by the sudden change in atmosphere as Wade seemed to be. Brandon kissed her cheek and walked out of their house.

He jogged the five miles home in the rain, angry at himself for letting his heart rule his head.

Chapter 8

Wade drove past the entrance to the Reed ranch at noon, a couple of days after he’d last seen or heard from Brandon and hit the brakes hard. He sat there for a minute, staring at the cattle grazing in a nearby field, their tails swishing back and forth as their skin twitched from the flies swarming around them in the hot afternoon.

“God, but you’re a pain in the ass, Brandon,” he said, shaking his head at the thought of him. Wade dug his phone out of his pocket to call Kimber, telling her briefly what he planned to do and that he’d be late home.

He turned the pickup around and drove towards Brandon’s house, his mood getting worse the nearer he got. Wade pulled up and leapt from the cab, taking the steps up to the porch two at a time and pounded on the door, praying Seth’s wife wouldn’t answer again.

For some reason, it irritated him even more when Brandon was the one to open the door. The last few days had been hell for Wade, and Kimber was just as miserable. All because Brandon thought he could fuck with their heads again. The least he could do was look like he gave a damn.

Wade brushed past him to walk into the house. Everything was covered in dust sheets, and the walls had been stripped of all the family photos. A pile of boxes sat in a corner, still waiting to be unpacked, and Wade had to wonder if Brandon had been honest about staying in Chelwood. “Do you mind telling me what your fucking problem is?”

“Come in, why don’t you.” Brandon smirked, and Wade knew he was going to have to hit him if he didn’t stop. But Brandon raised his hands in surrender before Wade could do anything. “Sorry. I don’t mean to sound so glib all the time. That’s just a stupid thing I always do when I’m on the defensive.”

“What are you defending yourself against—me and Kimber? Two people who welcomed you into their lives with open arms just so you could throw it back in their faces?”

Brandon smiled again, but this time he looked so sad that Wade couldn’t get mad at him for it. “Ah, but that’s just it. It’s your life—yours and Kimber’s. I was never meant to be a part of it.”

“But you’ve always been a part of us, even when you weren’t here.”

“That’s not true. I watched you two together that night. You and Kimber are perfect for each other…and you don’t need me messing up what you have together.”

Wade stared at his friend, wondering how he could be so smart, yet so dumb at the same time. “Made for each other, huh? I’ve spent half my life lying to myself about who I was, and Kimber’s never gotten over you. That doesn’t sound too ‘perfect’ to me.”

Brandon shook his head. “It’s better than anything I’ve ever had the good luck to find. Even with all that going against you, you found each other and made it work. To see you two together takes my breath away.”

“Hey,” Wade said, crossing the hall when Brandon wouldn’t look at him. “You know what perfection is? It’s having every want, every whim…every damned desire I could ever have, met by the two people I care about most in the world.”

“That’s just your dick talking.” Brandon tried to laugh off Wade’s words, but the expression in his eyes told a different story.

Wade put his hand on the back of Brandon’s neck, rubbing at the tight knot of muscle there. “It’s not. If sex was all I cared about, then Kimber is everything I need to be happy. If another man even looked at me the way you do, I think I’d punch him out.” Brandon smiled as Wade inched closer. “The thing is—we need you in our lives now. Like you said, you can’t unring a bell. Kimber and I have barely touched each other since the night you left. I’m not gonna lie to you. We did have sex once, but it just didn’t feel right because you weren’t there.”

Brandon pulled away. “I dreamed of being with you and Kimber like this for years but never dared hope it could ever happen. But now that it has, I feel like a spare part. Sure, it works when we’re all together, but would you and I have a relationship if there was no Kimber?”

“But there is, and I wouldn’t want it any other way. Would you?”

“Of course not. But I know how things are between us when it’s just me and her. I don’t know how we’d be together, you and me. If she wasn’t around, would there be no us?”

“I don’t understand. Why wouldn’t she be around?”

Brandon rubbed at the back of his neck, and Wade knew he wouldn’t like what he was going to say. “Well, hell! You’re not perfect, and neither am I. We could do something to piss her off, and she might leave us one day. Or…or something else could happen. Remember, I just buried my mom.”

Wade lashed out without thinking, slamming Brandon into the wall. “Don’t speak that way!”

“I’m sorry, forget I said that. But put yourself in my shoes for a minute. What if Kimber does get tired of us? Am I going to lose her and you, all at the same time?”

“That’s not going to happen. Trust me.”

“I do trust you, but you’re asking a lot of me, and I’m not sure I’m brave enough to take the risk. I have more to lose than you. Have you ever thought of that?”

Wade sighed and looked down at the floor, appalled that he’d never even considered the possibility. “I guess I’m no more sensitive to other people’s needs than I ever was.”

Brandon reached for Wade and rubbed his shoulder, giving him a gentle shake. “There’s nothing wrong with you. It’s me. I’m just not as reckless as I used to be.”

“What can I do to fix this?” Wade stared into Brandon’s eyes, searching for some clue as to how he could make things better.

“Nothing. It’s not your fault you don’t want me.”

Wade looked around the hall, hamming it up a little for Brandon to try and make him smile. “Who in the hell said I didn’t want you? Just what do you think I’m doing here?”

“You said it, remember? You said you were sorry that you couldn’t love me in the way I needed you to.”

“Brandon, I don’t know what’s normal, or what you expect from me. All I meant was that I don’t have the same kind of feelings for you as I do for Kimber. I mean, I don’t feel like I need to protect you, or defend your honor.” Wade could feel himself blushing, and he tried to turn away, but Brandon wouldn’t let him. “Shit, I don’t even know what you want.”

“You…or to be more accurate, you and Kimber. But right now, I want you.” Brandon grabbed his shirt, tipping Wade off balance when he yanked him forward. Their lips met in a crushing kiss, and Wade felt his hat slide of his head when Brandon’s hands tugged at his hair. Brandon tried to reach for Wade’s belt, but he stopped him, pinning Brandon’s arms to the wall above his head and sliding his thigh into the gap between Brandon’s legs to hold him there.

“It’s no wonder you have no idea how much I want to fuck you,” Wade said, sucking Brandon’s bottom lip in between his teeth before moving on to nibble at his jaw. “You never stop trying to run the show.”

Wade’s teeth latched on to Brandon’s neck. He let go of Brandon’s arms and reached down between them to rub his palm against the hard ridge of Brandon’s erection, his own cock hardening when Brandon grew firmer under his hand. Again, Brandon reached for him, and Wade pushed him back, slamming him into the wall much harder than he meant to, but, judging by the groan Brandon let out, he liked it anyway. He tore at the buckle of Brandon’s belt, tugging it through the loops of his jeans and throwing it to the floor. The buttons of his fly gave way easily—and then Wade had Brandon’s cock in his hand.

A lack of experience in what to do for another man caused Wade to hesitate for a second, but then he just figured that he was a man, too, and he knew what felt good as well as the next guy. So he wrapped his fingers around the shaft, his grip firm, and slid his hand up and down, squeezing a little as he reached the tip. Brandon groaned, and his head fell back in ecstasy as his hands dropped to his sides. Wade kissed him again, sliding his tongue inside Brandon’s hot mouth, and the memory of that mouth on his cock a few nights ago made him ache with need. Wade knew what he had to do.

He dropped to his knees in front of Brandon, again uncertain of just how to do it, but sure he wanted to try. Grasping Brandon’s prick at the root, Wade pulled it towards him as he opened his mouth and took Brandon inside. The warm, soft flesh felt good in his mouth, and he swirled his tongue around to taste Brandon fully, surprised to find he liked it. Moving his hand in time with the rhythm Brandon set by pumping his hips, Wade learned when to lean forward and how to take more of Brandon in.

Wade could hear and feel that Brandon was ready to explode, and he doubled his efforts, determined to give him such an intense orgasm that he could never doubt again that Wade truly wanted him. But when Brandon’s hands knotted in his hair and tugged his head away, Wade followed his silent command and got to his feet.

Brandon’s lips found his as soon as Wade was close enough to reach, and he plunged his tongue into Wade’s mouth, groaning at the taste of himself on Wade’s lips. Or at least Wade assumed that’s what it was. But maybe he just liked the way Wade was pulling on his cock relentlessly, his fist clenched around it, knowing from experience that a firm touch was what a man wanted when he was about to come. Wade pushed Brandon’s face to one side, pinning his head against the wall to lean in and bite the strong cords in his neck, nibbling his way up to his ear.

“Tell me how it feels to have my hands on you.”

“So good…so fucking good.”

Wade grabbed a handful of Brandon’s hair, keeping him trapped and biting him again. Brandon wasn’t anywhere near as out of control as Wade wanted him to be, and there was no fucking way Wade was going to let him get away with it.

“I want you to fuck my hand. Do you hear me, Brandon? I want you to pump your cock into my fist as hard and fast as you can.”

“Yes…yes,” Brandon groaned, his voice fading away as his hips jerked erratically, increasing the speed of his thrusts. Wade watched Brandon’s face go slack as the first wave of his orgasm tore through him. Brandon roared, surging forwards and then falling back and banging his head into the wall when the first powerful jet of cum splashed over Wade’s wrist. He watched the muscles of Brandon’s abdomen convulsing, his stomach clenching and releasing in time with the thick spurts of semen pumping out of him. Wade held him until the tremors left his body, smiling when Brandon gasped and shuddered as he pulled his flaccid penis out of Wade’s hand.

“Fuck! You learn fast,” Brandon said in a husky voice, his green eyes still hazy with lust and his chest heaving.

Wade looked down at his hand, unsure what to do with the sticky mess for now. Brandon laughed and tore off his T-shirt. Wade grinned and took it from him, wiping away the evidence of Brandon’s arousal, but pleased that his first attempt at seducing a man had been so successful. “So I guess I’m an expert now, huh?”

Brandon smiled, pushing Wade to one side as he slid off his jeans. Brandon stood naked before him, smiling in a way that made Wade’s cock throb with anticipation. “Almost, Wade…almost.”

* * * *

Wade jerked beneath Brandon’s hands as he rolled the condom down over Wade’s penis. They were in Brandon’s bed in the Shaker style back room of the one-story house, curtains drawn against the low evening sun streaming in through the windows.

Brandon tossed Wade a bottle of lube and turned over to lay on his front, warning him not to use too much. Wade laughed and squirted some into his palm. “This ain’t my first rodeo, Buddy.”

Relaxing when he realized Wade and Kimber must have done this before and that he wouldn’t have to coach him, Brandon scooted to his knees, eager now for Wade to get on with it. Brandon needed this connection with the man he loved. He had no idea when he might see Wade again, and the memories they made today would live in his heart until it was safe for him to come back.