Crampton (12 page)

MULDER

(a little frustrated)

Ricky, we're not on a social call here. An FBI agent is dead, killed right in the middle of the J. Edgar friggin Hoover Building, and the Director has taken it a little personally. Once upon a time you might have been able to label this thing "unsolved" and let it go at that, but that's not really an option for us now.

RICKY SMITH

I'll tell you what: go check out your address. If you really want to stick around Crampton, you're welcome to stay here.

Mulder and Scully look at each other. Given the general squalor of the yellow house, Ricky's offer is not an appealing one.

RICKY SMITH

Or, if you want, there's a cheap little motel in town. You go there, have a look around. If you still want to talk to me, we can talk tomorrow. It's not like I'm going anywhere.

MULDER

(pulling out a notebook and pen)

What's your phone number?

RICKY SMITH

Don't have a phone number. Don't have a phone.

SCULLY

You don't have a telephone?

RICKY SMITH

Nope.

Mulder hands Ricky his cell phone.

MULDER

I want you to take this, then. Scully's cell phone number is star-six. Call us if you remember anything you think we ought to know.

SUPER: MAIN STREET, CRAMPTON, OHIO

EXT. MAIN STREET - DAY

"Crummy little town" does not even begin to describe this desolate burg. Though Mulder and Scully's drive down Crampton's Main Street takes them past a number of buildings, most appear to be abandoned. There seem to be only three active businesses: the "Fix-It and Supply" shop, the Oasis Motel that Ricky mentioned, and a diner apparently called "EAT HERE."

INT. OASIS MOTEL

Mulder and Scully enter the office of the Oasis Motel, their overnight bags over their shoulders. Mulder RINGS the service bell. Also in the office is an older COUPLE. Judging by their colorfully patterned clothes, sunglasses, and cameras, they are tourists.

TOURIST WOMAN

(in a British accent)

Excuse me, could we take your picture?

SCULLY

I'm sorry?

TOURIST WOMAN

My husband and I are on a photographic excursion, and we'd like to take a picture of you and your husband. It would go so well with the others.

Mulder puts his arm around Scully's shoulders.

MULDER

Why, certainly!

SCULLY

(shrugging Mulder)'s arm off)

We're not married.

Too late: the woman's camera FLASHES, and the picture is taken. As the tourist couple leaves, the MANAGER appears from a back room.

MANAGER

Good afternoon. Have you stayed with us before?

Scully begins filling out the necessary forms, while Mulder surveys the small office. A cigarette machine, the kind with the pull-knobs. Two faux-leather chairs, cracked by heat and sunlight. A gumball dispenser, with a small sign saying the proceeds benefit the local Knights of Columbus.

On a small table is a stack of leaflets. Mulder reads one, then takes it over to Scully. "Spectacular Display of Illusion and Ventriloquism," it promises, to be held at three o'clock the next day at the Masonic Hall.

SCULLY

Mulder, I think I've seen enough magic tricks for one day.

MULDER

Look at this, Scully.

Mulder points to the bottom of the advertisement: "Sponsored by Illusions of Empire."

MANAGER

Ah, yes. Our little magic show. You don't want to miss that. It's the only show in town, so to speak.

He hands them two keys.

MANAGER

If there's anything you need, please don't hesitate to ask me. I'm always at the disposal of my guests.

EXT. MAIN STREET - LATE AFTERNOON

Mulder stands on the sidewalk in front of the "Fix-It and Supply Shop." Scully is some distance behind him, talking on her cell-phone. There is a sign on the shop's door: "BACK AT SEVEN."

Scully ends her phone call and walks over to Mulder.

SCULLY

That was Skinner. They're not having any luck on their end. On top of that, the terrorist cover story seems to have backfired: an official at the Syrian embassy in Washington was assassinated about two hours ago, and the Syrians are calling it an "act of retribution" on the part of the United States.

MULDER

Retribution for what? Oh, no--Johnson's murder?

SCULLY

Exactly. And since it's too late to retract the terrorist story, they're just going to have to ride it out.

MULDER

Washington must be a real madhouse. For the first time today, I'm glad we're in Crampton.

SCULLY

Speaking of which, what's the story with the Fix-It Shop?

MULDER

(checking his watch)

We've got about a half hour before Fred's due back. Let's have a look at the hall where this magic show is supposed to be held.

They cross the street and walk the half-block to the Masonic Hall. From the outside, it looks like every other ruined, abandoned building along Main Street, except for the rather cryptic Masonic symbols adorning its face, which Mulder stands contemplating for some moments.

SCULLY

Don't tell me you've never seen a Masonic Hall before.

MULDER

You know, Scully, there are thousands of these things in cities all over the world, but the origins of Freemasonry itself are all but unknown. In the prehistoric period they were one of the first secret societies--possibly the first cult. Some scholars trace the beginnings of the Freemasons to the Egyptian god Thoth, the god of wisdom and learning who's thought of as a source of the earliest writings that attempt to illuminate the mysteries of existence. Thoth is also considered by some to be the first sorcerer or magician, and by others--

SCULLY

(interrupting at the word "magician")

Hold it. Are you trying to tell me that this is some kind of conspiracy involving the Freemasons?

MULDER

Jeez, Scully, when you say it like that, you make it sound ... kinda stupid.

Scully tries the hall's main door. It is unlocked. She pushes it open and the agents look inside. Pitch black.

MULDER

Looks like a flashlight job.

SCULLY

Great.

INT. MASONIC HALL

For a second, everything is black. Then a flashlight beam slices through the darkness.

Even by flashlight, the agents can see the Masonic Hall is a total disaster: broken chairs and debris litter the floor, dust and filth has accumulated in piles in the corners. There is a stage, the wooden planks of which don't look like they can support a person's weight. Still hanging across the stage is a curtain, obviously once quite ornate but now in tatters.

SCULLY

I don't know about you, but I don't think there's going to be a magic show here tomorrow.

MULDER

That's okay--I really hate matinees, anyway.

The beam of the flashlight flickers and goes out. They are plunged into complete blackness.

MULDER

Scully, I think I'm having déjà vu all over again. Scully?

SCULLY

I think I'm having it, too. Not déjà vu exactly. It's like you said: not something you've already done, but something you already know.

There is a CRACK, not unlike that of a hand smacking a flashlight. The beam blazes back to life.

MULDER

(pointing the flashlight)

Is that an office back there?

INT. MASONIC HALL OFFICE

The agents enter the tiny office, the beam of the flashlight roaming around the room. It stops on a desk, apparently the only piece of furniture in the whole building. On it sits a heavy black phone.

SCULLY

Mulder, does this look familiar at all?

MULDER

The Mystery Line commercial.

Mulder goes over to the desk. He hesitates a moment, then picks up the telephone receiver. He starts to bring it to his ear...

SCULLY

Uh, Mulder?

Mulder shines the flashlight towards Scully's voice. She is holding up the end of the telephone cord. It is frayed, wires dangling, as though it were torn from the wall. Mulder, a little embarrassed, sets the receiver back in its cradle.

EXT. MAIN STREET - EVENING

Mulder and Scully exit the ruined hall, overcoats dusty, hair full of cobwebs. Scully dusts herself off.

SCULLY

When we get back to the motel, I'm going to take a long shower.

MULDER

Looks like Fred's back.

Across the street, the Fix-It and Supply Shop's sign has been turned around to read "OPEN FOR BUSINESS." Inside, a figure can be seen working. Mulder begins crossing the street. Scully stands there, pulling long, dusty knots of cobweb out of her hair.

MULDER

Coming?

SCULLY

Sure. Why not.

INT. FIX-IT SHOP

A small bell RINGS as Mulder and Scully enter the Fix-It shop. The shopowner, FRED, does not look up. Wearing overalls and a pair of glasses, one lens of which has been fitted with an eyepiece for working on minute mechanisms, he is hunched over some obscure device, working at it with tiny tools.

SCULLY

Excuse me?

Fred still does not acknowledge them.

SCULLY

Excuse me, I'm Agent Scully. This is Agent Mulder. We're with the FBI.

FRED

(concentrating on his gizmo)

I heard about you.

Fred goes back to ignoring the agents. Scully, looking around the shop, notices a sheet of paper on the counter. She holds it up for Mulder to see: "Spectacular Display of Illusion and Ventriloquism."

MULDER

Sir, we're here on an investigation.

He holds up the receipt from Illusions of Empire.

MULDER

Maybe you could tell us how your shop's address turned up on this receipt.

With a sigh full of irritation, Fred finally gets up from his workbench to examine the receipt.

FRED

(reading slowly)

"Illusions ... of ... Empire." Magic shop? I've never been too interested in magic.

Fred squints, reading through the magnifying eyepiece.

FRED

Why, that ain't even my handwriting. Sorry, can't help you.

MULDER

Sir, I understand you're probably a very busy man, but this is kind of a serious matter.

Outside, an old van--the kind with no windows along its sides--pulls in front of the shop.

FRED

Listen, agent whoever you are. I don't belong to any militia and I ain't never done anything illegal, least not that I know of. I'm just trying to run a business here. I take whatever jobs come my way--mostly piecework.

Fred holds up his gizmo as an example. Even up close, the thing offers no clue as to what it is or what it does.

FRED

I usually don't know what the whole machine looks like, and to tell you the truth I don't much care. Now, however serious it might seem, this business that brought you here ... well, offhand I'd say someone is having some fun at your expense.

Mulder looks to his partner for some help, but the look on Scully's face says she's thinking the same thing as Fred.

Outside, a teenage KID pops out of the passenger door of the van and enters the Fix-It shop. Fred puts down his gizmo.

FRED

Excuse me, but I have a real customer.

Fred waves the kid over the the far end of the desk, away from the agents. He retrieves something from a shelf, a package of some sort wrapped in black paper and held together with leather straps. Fred and the kid turn their shoulders to Mulder and Scully and speak in WHISPERS so they cannot overhear. Fred seems to be giving the kid some kind of instructions: he grasps his left hand with the thumb and forefinger of his right, creating the image of a handcuff or shackle of some kind. He then moves both hands as if pulling a length of rope, letting it go slack and pulling it taut again. The kid nods. Finally, the kid exits the shop with his package under his arm and gets in the van, which drives away.

MULDER

We'd like to ask you a couple more questions.

FRED

No. No, sir, I'm closing up for the night. I'm going to have to ask you to leave.

MULDER

I'm sure it will just take a few minutes of your time.

FRED

I'll tell you what. It's past my dinner time. If you really want to talk that bad, we can talk over at the diner.

He takes a ratty coat off a hook.

FRED

I got to go out the back to turn the lights out. I'll meet you out front and we can walk there together.

EXT. MAIN STREET - EVENING

Mulder and Scully exit through the front door; inside, they see Fred hit a series of light switches, then open a back door and step out.

Mulder and Scully wait a few moments. No sign of Fred. The agents walk to the back of the building.

EXT. BACK OF FIX-IT SHOP - EVENING

The rear of the fix-it shop is a blank brick wall, bearing a few stains and patches of crumbling mortar. There is no back door.

SCULLY

Wonderful.

INT. "EAT HERE" DINER

Treacly MUZAK plays to empty tables. As with seemingly every building in Crampton, the diner displays an advertisement for the "spectacular" magic show tomorrow at three, this one taped to the front window.

Mulder and Scully enter and take seats at the counter.

MULDER

(in a tired voice)

Okay, Scully, so what do we have so far?

SCULLY

(also tired)

So far? Nothing I'd care to bring back to Skinner. Unless you want to haul Ricky Smith to Washington to do card tricks for the director. It's as though none of this has anything to do with Agent Johnson's murder anymore. It's all changed. I feel like we're on some kind of weird scavenger hunt.

Scully seems on the brink of something, but can't quite articulate it.

SCULLY

It's almost like all this is just an excuse to to ... something. I don't know, maybe--

COUNTERGIRL

(appearing suddenly and interrupting Scully)

Good evening, folks! Would you like to try the meatloaf tonight?

Mulder and Scully look up sharply, Scully's train of thought lost. The COUNTERGIRL is tall and very attractive, but wearing too much makeup, giving her face a waxy appearance.