Crazy Sexy Diet: Eat Your Veggies, Ignite Your Spark, and Live Like You Mean It! (53 page)

Day 4
21-DAY
CLEANSE

Remember when we
were kids and we imagined we’d have our very own amusement park, along with two pet dinosaurs and a rocket for getting to school? Not only did we think it, we believed it to our core. Then one day a ninny of a neighbor pierced the dream with really dumb words: “Suzie, you can’t own a rocket or a dinosaur. That’s just silly.” Your response: “What?” Followed by tears, snot, and disillusionment. Likewise, the new you may scare people because it forces them to look in the mirror. You may start hearing the voice of negativity from friends, family, and acquaintances starting about now and continuing in the future. Don’t let the judgment of others who are less supportive of or puzzled (and maybe threatened) by your new lifestyle bring you down. Understand that they just don’t understand. Reassure them that you’re happy and getting healthier. Do it nicely, with love.

Let your goals, no matter how big, be and feel real to you. Suck them in, smell and lick them. You have nothing to lose! Oh, and release the ninny. You may still be holding on to her words even though she’s long gone from your life.

Please help me locate my inner rebel. May I become a trailblazing leader, not a follower. When I stand in my fully actualized glory, I encourage others to do the same.

I have unlimited health, spiritual wealth, and happiness now. I am precious and I have so much to offer. The world needs me today.

You have an ass, so shake it. How many minutes can you spare? Let’s try thirty-five! Hula would be very fun, don’t you agree? Notice your breath as you exercise. Are you holding it or breathing too shallow? Combining deep breathing with exercise stimulates your lymph system and helps move toxins out of your body. Now that you adore your neti pot, you probably love the sinus ease it creates! Breathe, baby, breathe!

Snack on sunshine. That’s right! Smokers take cig breaks and that seems to be perfectly acceptable. Why can’t you take a twenty-minute sun break for some free vitamin D?

Day 5
21-DAY
CLEANSE

You might hit the TGIF terrors today.
Friday can be scary for those of you who have traditionally designated it as the start of two days of indulgence, drinking, and sleeping in. Some strategic planning on how you’ll handle festivities with friends that in the past led to eating crap, drinking poison, and general debauchery is in order. Celebrate your spirit without boozefilled spirits. Vodka tonics and limes will always be there. For now, just stick with the lime.

If you think you might slip over the weekend, plan your response now. This way when the urge rears its savage head, you’ll be ready. When the going gets tough, the tough get grounded! Take a moment to feel your feet on the floor, be aware of your butt cheeks on the chair, take a few deep breaths, and let the temptation pass. Ask yourself what you really want. Chances are it has nothing to do with food. Maybe you need a hug or a nap or a talk with a trusted therapist. If you have to have this chat with yourself on the can in a public bathroom—so be it. Worse things have happened on that can!

May I share my shine without dimming it. Help me socialize with integrity. By setting an example, I inspire others. Remind me when I forget and fill me with holy shazzam discipline.

When I put my mind to it, I can do anything. I am Wonder Woman and I wear bulletproof cuffs. I am able to wrangle my cravings with my Magic Lasso and remove them via my Invisible Plane—I’m in charge!

Meditation doesn’t mean relaxation. Meditation is work and I sure hope you’re doing it! If it was good enough for the Beatles, it’s good enough for you! They meditated twenty minutes every day, and those dudes turned out pretty good.

Dine with the divine … Try to finish your meal three hours before bed. Your body repairs at night. Don’t add to the burden by making it digest as well.

Day 6
21-DAY
CLEANSE

Emotional detox symptoms
are very, very normal. Irritability and feeling a little depressed and teary is part of the process (especially if you happen to have your period). You’ve removed the food vices that covered your pain, the snacks that created a false sense of joy (for like thirty seconds). Good for you! Substances that make us numb out are veils. Wear them on your wedding if you want, but not for the rest of your life. I promise the clouds will clear very soon—but they will come back if you don’t do some emotional weeding.

You!
Put some time aside to rest and refresh today. Take stock of your week and please write in your journal about your challenges, your victories, and any tips that can help you in the weeks to come. Make sure to use kind language. When you’re done scribbling, go do something lovely for lovely you. Mani? Rub? Walk? Tea with a fun friend? Free time spent without food might leave you feeling, well, aimless. Fill it with experiences that can become wonderful memories. At the end of our lives, memories are all we have. Make lots of them!

May I be happy and free. May I be loving and loved. May I be healthy and whole.

Each step is a victory. Each fall is a lesson. Either way, I am improving now.

Add in a few long, luxurious stretches after your exercise routine. Include affirmations with every move. Touch your toes: I am flexible. Twist to the side: I am gutsy. Reach for the sky: I am expansive. Bend over backward: I am lean. Stand on your head: I am a great chef!

Shop. For spinach, not shoes. You have another big week ahead, and tomorrow is a fasting day—prep for it sassy. Also, make sure you are drinking enough water, getting enough of the good fats, and chomping your greens. You shouldn’t be hungry. Yes, you may be losing weight, but that’s a side effect, not the main point. If you’re a normal weight or on the thin side and feel you’re losing too many pounds, add more nuts and seeds (whole or as butters), cooked grain, gluten-free bread, and other higher-calorie foods like avocados. If you’re overweight, the CSD will bring your body into balance naturally.

Day 7
21-DAY
CLEANSE

You may be fasting
for part of the day today or for all of it. Do what feels right for you and listen to your body. Whatever you decide, keep hydrated and juicy.

Techno detox! Yesterday you cleansed emotions; today you’ll cleanse the need to obsessively check your inbox. As Timothy Leary said, “Tune in, turn on, drop out”—of technology! That’s right, fast from pixels. When you realize you’re spending more time Googling fun stuff than actually doing it, you have to replace online noodling with real-world alternatives. Too much time sitting and surfing creates back problems, dry eyes, carpal tunnel, sleep issues, and even migraines. Change your relationship to technology. Start by meditating on ways you can structure your techno time better. Consider these:

• Pick up the phone old-school style, rather than shooting out endless e-mails.

• Check your e-mail only at scheduled times—10 a.m., 2 p.m., 4 p.m.—and turn off the sound notification while you’re at it.

• Limit online multitasking. You get less done than you think when you do this.

• Cease and desist on the Facebook exboyfriend snoop.

• Use an e-mail auto responder when you need to get caught up or just want a time-out. I used an auto responder, for the last six months of writing this book, and I couldn’t have finished it without it. Here’s what I wrote …

Cherished friends,

I am on a tight writing deadline for my next book. As a result, I may not be able to get back to you anytime soon. If this is urgent, please contact my assistant.

Peace, love, and veggies,

Kris Carr

• If you tweet, do it with purpose and not during dinner. No one really cares that you just wiped your ass. Twitter is for brand building, not senseless narcissistic drivel.

In this chaotic world, help me find peace, and remind me to limit the distractions that keep me from embracing my self-care. Impossible deadlines and stress create acidity in my body. The world won’t blow up if I take a day off.

I am calm and light. I am peaceful and easygoing. I find beauty in simplicity.

Get your cute ass outside in nature. Go to the beach, hit a mountain trail or local park, climb a tree, hunt waterfalls. I don’t care if it’s only 10 degrees outside and you’d rather cuddle with your laptop. Don’t. Wrap yourself up like a warm burrito and let the cold wind slap you silly. Follow with a hot shower and essential oils skin elixir. Mix 15 to 20 drops of your fave essential oil with a jojoba, avocado, coconut, or sweet almond “carrier” oil for a healthy all-over moisturizer.

Kill your television! No Internet tonight, either. I betcha there’s a great book on your shelf that would really love to be held. Books have feelings, too!

Day 8
21-DAY
CLEANSE

You did it!
Week 1 is under your belt and no matter how it went, the hardest part is behind you. There will be more icy patches ahead (detox symptoms can pop up at any time), but you’ve taken some heroic steps. I wish you could see me giving you a standing ovation!

Everything you need to learn in life, you can learn from a chair. The diet is the seat (the largest area of focus); the mind, body, spirit, and daily practice are the four legs. When any one is off, we topple. Which one is off, doll? Pick one area of focus this week and crank it up!