Dad's E-Mail Order Bride (12 page)

Graham had some things to get ready for his guests, he’d said. And maybe he did. But Courtney suspected Graham was using his guests as a good excuse to avoid any further interaction with her before she left.

And yes, that hurt.

But leaving her alone with Rachel to clean up after dinner was the perfect opportunity to have that heart-to-heart about staying in touch. Courtney didn’t intend to waste the little time she and Rachel had left.

“I want you to still call me. Every night if you want to,” Courtney said as she rinsed a plate and handed it to Rachel to dry.

“Okay,” Rachel said, but with very little enthusiasm.

“And e-mail me, of course.”

Rachel nodded as she placed the plate in the cabinet.

“That’s what good friends do,” Courtney said. “They make it a point to stay in touch.”

Rachel burst into tears.

“Oh, sweetie,” Courtney said, putting both arms around Rachel. “Don’t cry. We’ll still talk to each other. Just like we have been for the past three months. Nothing’s changed.”

Rachel pushed away from her. Courtney tore off a section of paper towel and handed it to her.

“You don’t understand,” Rachel said, dabbing at her eyes. “I’ll never survive another summer here. You think I’m kidding, but I’m not. I’ll kill myself first.”

Courtney grabbed Rachel by the shoulders and shook her so fast, it scared both of them. “Don’t you
ever
say that again. Suicide isn’t something to joke about, Rachel.”

“Okay,” Rachel said, her eyes wide with fear when Courtney let her go. “I’m sorry.”

“No, I’m the one who’s sorry,” Courtney said, pulling Rachel into a fierce hug. “I was your age when a good friend killed herself. And I’ve never forgiven myself for not taking her seriously when she said she’d never survive her parents’ divorce.”

When she released Rachel, Courtney said, “We all go through tough times, Rachel. But tough times always pass. Nothing is ever worth ending your life over. And if you’re really having thoughts of suicide, we need to get you some help.”

“Why can’t you help me?” Rachel begged. “Ask Dad if I can spend the summer with you in New York. Please. I hate summers here. There’s absolutely nothing to do. And Dad’s always out with his fishing parties. I might as well be dead. That’s the way I feel most of the time. Like a lifeless corpse, slowly rotting away.”

“You know your father would never agree to letting you spend the summer in New York with me,” Courtney said. “Besides, I work impossibly long hours. We’d never see each other.”

Rachel’s face clouded over again.

Courtney said, “Have you ever thought about asking Graham to compromise for the next three years and let you live in New York during the school term?”

Rachel shook her head. “Dad would never do that.”

Courtney said, “You’ll never know unless you ask, Rachel. And I hate to point this out, but the conversation we’re having right now is one you should be having with your father. Don’t be afraid to tell him how you feel about things. He loves you. He’ll listen.”

“Dad never listens to me,” Rachel argued. “He only tells me he’s the parent and I’m the child, and that’s the end of it.” She let out a sigh. “Can’t you talk to him about us living in New York during the school year, Courtney? He would listen to you.”

“I’m sorry, Rachel,” Courtney said. “But you and your dad need to work your problems out together. Truthfully, it’s none of my business. And it would only take about two seconds before your dad told me that.”

Rachel’s face turned blood red. “I thought you were different, but you aren’t. And I thought you really cared about me, but you don’t. So stop pretending you’re so concerned! You just proved you’re not.”

Courtney reached for her hand but Rachel jerked it away.

“I do care about you, Rachel,” Courtney said.

“No, you don’t,” Rachel accused. “You’re just like my mother. All you care about is yourself.”

Realization hit Courtney like a thunderbolt.

Rachel hadn’t only been searching for a wife for Graham. She’d also been searching for a mother. Common sense told Courtney to back off. That it wasn’t her place to step in and be a mother to Rachel.

The torment on Rachel’s face wouldn’t let her.

“What if I spend the summer here in Port Protection with you?” The words had popped right of Courtney’s mouth.

Rachel blinked. “You would really do that for me?”

“Yes.”

Rachel grabbed her in a bear hug.

This was a huge decision—a completely life-altering one. Part of Courtney was appalled at how quickly she’d made it. But another part or her had known she wasn’t leaving Port Protection the instant Graham told her to go home. The scare Rachel had just given her only confirmed Courtney’s decision that she wasn’t going anywhere.

She’d come to Alaska to prove she could make her own decisions. And not her mother, or Graham, or anyone else was going to tell her what to do.

Staying was about what
she
wanted.

She wanted to see if she really could live in Port Protection without being bored in a week’s time. She wanted to see if Beth was right, that the letdown she felt after landing her big account was only normal and that she would want to go back to New York and her career. She wanted to work Rachel’s butt off all summer, so Rachel would never complain about having nothing to do again. And yes, Courtney wanted to stay and prove to Graham that his past didn’t matter to her. If she left without doing all of those things, Courtney knew she would regret it.

She had a lifetime of regrets she couldn’t change.

Courtney wouldn’t allow that to happen to her future.

The silent ride back to the lodge after his confession at the gazebo,
and
trying to pretend nothing was wrong at dinner had been painful enough. Only a sadist would have stuck around to see the pity in Courtney’s eyes where admiration had once been.

At least Courtney wouldn’t leave thinking he wasn’t man enough to finish what he’d started back at the gazebo. Now she understood he was man enough to let her go back to New York and find love and happiness with a man who didn’t have so many demons in his past.

Courtney deserved happiness.

He didn’t.

But another glance at his bedside clock made Graham wonder why Rachel hadn’t already come to check on him. He rarely slept past six and it was now eight o’clock in the morning.

Graham also hadn’t heard any movement in the house since he’d been awake, leading him to believe Rachel and Courtney were sleeping in this morning, too. He’d shower and have breakfast waiting when they did get up.

He didn’t want Courtney to leave hating his guts.

He just wanted her to leave.

For her sake, and for his.

When Graham made it into the kitchen fifteen minutes later, however, he found evidence that Courtney and Rachel had already eaten breakfast—two plates were stacked neatly in the sink, two juice glasses beside them. He forgot about making breakfast and made a pot of coffee instead. He had just poured a cup when he heard the front door open. Seconds later, Courtney and Rachel walked into the kitchen, Broadway right behind them.

“Glad to see you finally got up, old lazybones,” Rachel teased.

The
old
reference set his teeth on edge. “I’ve been up. Where have you been?”

“Oh, here and there,” Rachel said in a singsong voice.

Graham didn’t miss the wink Rachel gave Courtney. If either of them thought he was going to beg for a more specific answer, he wasn’t. His head hurt. He had a big day ahead of him. And he was in no mood for any more of Rachel’s games.

Graham took his coffee, pushed through the kitchen’s swinging doors and seated himself at the dining table in the great room. It was then he noticed Courtney’s luggage already packed and waiting by the front door.

She obviously couldn’t wait to be on her way. And he certainly couldn’t blame her after he’d revealed that Dr. Jekyll did indeed have a Mr. Hyde side.

Graham had just taken his first sip of coffee when Courtney walked out of the kitchen and stopped beside him at the table. She was wearing exactly what she’d been wearing the first time he saw her. And those tight jeans tucked into her high-heeled boots still left Graham’s tongue stuck to the roof of his mouth.

“I had Rachel figure up the cost of my plane ticket and my room for the last three nights,” she said, placing a credit card slip on the table in front of him.

Without even looking at her, Graham said, “You know I won’t accept this.”

“You don’t have a choice,” she said. “I had Rachel go ahead and run it through on my debit card.”

“Sorry, Dad,” Rachel called out from the kitchen. “But Courtney insisted.”

Graham’s only answer was another sip of coffee. He didn’t want to get into an argument with Courtney, even though it was obvious she was trying to provoke him. Besides, he could credit her debit card later.

What Graham wanted was for Courtney to leave on friendly terms. Then she could forget him. And he could forget her. And Courtney and Rachel could go back to corresponding on the Internet if they wanted. He only had to keep his cool and stay calm until Courtney left.

When Graham didn’t say anything else, Courtney walked away from the table. But he watched her from the corner of his eye as she left. When he saw she was headed toward the front door and her luggage, Graham stood.

“Don’t bother with your luggage, Courtney. I’ll take your bags to the dock when Gil arrives.”

She stopped and turned to face him.

“I’m not going with Gil.”

Graham thought he’d misunderstood. “What?”

“I’m staying, Graham,” she said simply.

Her words were still ringing in Graham’s ears when Courtney opened the front door and took her luggage with her. Graham hurried after her. He caught up with her before Courtney started down the front deck steps.

“Why are you doing this, Courtney?”

She looked straight at him. “Do you have a problem with me staying?”

“I do if staying has anything to do with us.”

Her eyebrow raised. “I wasn’t aware there is an
us,
Graham.”

“There isn’t. And there
won’t
be.”

She shrugged. “Well, you know where I’ll be in case you change your mind.”

Her words sobered Graham faster than a face slap.

Courtney had basically just called him a liar.

And she was staying in Port Protection to prove it.

“I won’t change my mind,” Graham vowed as she headed down the steps, her matching pink suitcases in tow.

Courtney didn’t answer.

And she
didn’t
look back.

She left Graham standing on the deck, shaking his head in total disbelief. Rachel ran past him, hurrying down the steps before Graham could argue.

“I’m going to help Courtney get settled in at The Wooden Nickel,” Rachel called over her shoulder.

Right behind Rachel trotted Broadway.

“Well, this is just perfect,” Graham said, throwing both hands up in the air.

The woman he’d told to go home was staying. And his daughter and his damn dog were running off to help her get settled. Where did that leave him? As blindsided by Courtney staying as he had been by her arrival.

Graham stomped inside and slammed the door behind him. The very nerve of her. Telling him exactly what she knew would eat him up inside.

What a dirty, rotten, low-down thing to do to a guy.

He’d tried to do the honorable thing—warning Courtney he wasn’t worth her time. Everything he’d told her at the gazebo was one hundred percent proof that there was no future with him—not now, not ever.

And what had Courtney done?

She’d ignored him completely.

Well, dammit, he wasn’t going to be forced into anything. Not by Rachel or by Courtney. Courtney could stay in Port Protection for the summer or she could stay for the rest of her life, and it wasn’t going to change a thing.

He
was in control of his life now.

Making anyone else happy was
not
on his agenda.