Daisy Fay and the Miracle Man: A Novel (35 page)

I said, “Who are you?” and walked right by him.

He said, “You are too going home with me even if I have to drag you out of here.”

I went over to Miss Prisim, who is the switchboard operator, and informed her that the man who looked somewhat like an albino was a total stranger to me and to please call the police. Jimmy kept making a commotion and Miss Prisim got so rattled that when she did get the number, she said, “Hello, this is the police,” and hung up.

Finally, Jimmy said, “All right, I didn’t want to tell you this, but your daddy has had a heart attack and is not expected to live and we have to go now.”

We ran out and got in the truck. Jimmy said they had him over at the bar because he had been in too bad a shape to move.

It was the longest ride in my life. I kept thinking I would never forgive myself if Daddy died before I had a chance to tell him I loved him. When we pulled up to the bar, I jumped out and ran in, but it was pitch-dark. I yelled, “Daddy! where are you?” And all of a sudden the lights came on and about twenty people screamed, “Surprise!!” and Daddy was standing right in the middle of them and there wasn’t a thing the matter with him. I was so glad to see him alive and so shocked I started to cry.

Everybody was there. Mr. Cecil and the Cecilettes, Tootie, Helen, Dolores, Paris Knights, and J.R., Professor Teasley and his mother, and they all started singing “For she’s a jolly good fellow.” On the wall was a big sign that read “Miss Mississippi Pageant or Bust.” After they made me sit down, Mr. Cecil went behind the curtains in the back room. Daddy turned on a spotlight he had borrowed and Mr. Cecil came back out in a red
sequined jacket and bow tie with a huge book that had “Daisy Fay Harper” written on it and said, “Settle down, Daisy Fay Harper, because
THIS IS YOUR LIFE
,” and everyone applauded.

“Do you remember this person? You haven’t seen her since you were twelve years old.”

A woman’s voice came from the back room. “Daisy, the last time we met was in Shell Beach in 1953.” I couldn’t think who it could be. Then J.R. put on a record of Jane Froman singing “I’ll Walk Alone” and I knew who it was—Betty Caldwell, the crippled girl I had healed. She came in and grabbed me and she looked great.

Mr. Cecil escorted her to a chair and announced,
“Now a special person you have never met
 … Daisy Fay, say hello to Daisy Fay the second.…” Then this little girl ran out and kissed me and handed me an envelope. She was Betty’s little girl who they had named after me. Inside the envelope was a note that said, “This entitles Miss Daisy Fay Harper the First to have two chipped teeth fixed free of charge.” Betty had married a dentist and had arranged for a friend of his to do it.

The next voice was a man’s. “Daisy, are you still eating all those hot fudge sundaes and bananas splits?” J.R. put on the theme music from
Gang Busters
 … It was Mr. Kilgore, the man from the FBI who had been with Opal Bates the day they had picked me up from school! He gave me a check for $50 signed by the FBI for services rendered, and wished me good luck.

Then Mr. Cecil said, “The next two guests need no introduction,” and all, of a sudden I heard two women scream “
BINGO
!!!” I knew who it was, it was Grandma Pettibone and Aunt Bess. I was so happy to see them I started to cry again. Grandma brought me underwear and Aunt Bess had frozen some black-eyed peas and collard greens from her restaurant Grandma whispered that she was still mad at Bess over the birth control pills but was speaking to her this week in my honor.

After they sat down, the theme music from
The King and I
came on and this deep booming voice said, “Roses are red, violets are blue, boy, do I have a wig for you! Et cetera et cetera et cetera.” It was Vernon Mooseburger with a wig and he even had false eyebrows. He kissed me and presented me with a certificate
for ten free lessons with Dale Carnegie, where he is now an executive.

After he went over and sat down, the music started, this time with the “Blue Danube Waltz.” A very familiar voice said, “Remember, Daisy, nothing succeeds more than personal charm.” It was Mrs. Dot!!! She came running in and I grabbed her and started crying again. She has been out of the hospital for three years and is teaching drama at a girls’ school in Gulfport, Mississippi, and looks just the same. Her gift was a complete set of Shakespeare’s works bound in leather.

J.R. did a drumroll and Mr. Cecil said, “Now, last but not least, a special mystery guest, all the way from Birmingham, Alabama, who wouldn’t be here tonight if it hadn’t been for you. Mystery guest, sign in please!!!” This pretty girl walked in and started writing her name on a blackboard they had set up. The minute I saw her ears I knew it was Angel Pistal, all grown up! Her mother and daddy were with her, and they gave me a check for $100.

J.R. played “Happy Days Are Here Again” on the record player while Mr. Cecil closed by announcing, “A party in your honor will be held in this room after the show for you and your guests, catered by Tommy and Jim, two of the Cecilettes. Daisy Fay Harper, this is your life!!!”

After that they rolled out a big table with all kinds of presents on it. Mr. Cecil and the Cecilettes bought me a whole new traveling outfit with shoes and hat and purse, and as a joke, Mr. Cecil had made up an ankle bracelet to match. Tootie and Helen and Dolores bought me a bathing suit which the Cecilettes had been up all night covering with white sequins. It’s got to be the most fantastic bathing suit in the world. Jimmy Snow gave me $75, and Professor Teasley and his mother gave me 100. Paris Knights bought me a beautiful Samsonite traveling bag with a matching cosmetic case.

But they saved the biggest package till the end. It was a huge pink box and when I opened it, I almost died. Inside was the most beautiful white evening gown I’ve ever seen. It must have cost a fortune. I couldn’t imagine who could have afforded it. I asked who it was from, but nobody knew. J.R. said, “Look at the card.”
I’d been in such a hurry I hadn’t seen it. It read “Good luck to a friend. Best, Mr. E. Gamble.” J.R. was grinning from ear to ear. Mrs. Underwood and her sixth graders sent me a good-luck note, and Peachy Wigham and Ula Sour made me coat hangers with cloth on them and wrote a sweet letter.

At the party afterwards Betty Caldwell told me she had read in the paper that Billy Bundy was in jail again. He’d been trying to heal people over the radio in Humboldt, Tennessee, when some woman had put her hands on the radio while her hands were wet and got knocked clear across the room.

We stayed up until three o’clock in the morning and had a ball. Angel told me all about herself and she is as sweet as ever and Mr. Cecil and Aunt Bess hit it off great. They danced almost every dance together. And I must say that Dale Carnegie course certainly must have paid off for Vernon Mooseburger because he went home with Paris Knights. I just hope his wig stayed on. Helen got so drunk at the end she was sitting there talking to one of those stuffed blowfish Daddy has on a wall. That party is the nicest thing that has ever happened to me in my whole life.

This morning Jimmy flew Grandma and Aunt Bess home in his plane and I went to the dentist and he fixed my teeth in an hour. You would never even know they had been chipped. I am all packed. I left my gown in the box and tied it on top of Jimmy’s truck so it won’t get mashed. Daddy and Jimmy and I leave for Tupelo the first thing in the morning. I love everybody in the world!

We arrived at the Dinkier Tutwiler Hotel in Tupelo at four-thirty this afternoon. As we were unpacking the truck, guess who drove up in a brand-new Cadillac? Kay Bob Benson and her mother! I thought I was rid of her forever, but somebody up there hates me.

I’ve never seen so many pretty girls. They are from all over the state.

The Dinkier Tutwiler Hotel is beautiful. The lobby is marble with real antique furniture, live palm trees and ferns everywhere. Signs were all over the walls saying, “Welcome, Miss Mississippi Hopefuls.” The woman at the registration desk told me that, because 138 girls were entered this year, the Dinkier Tutwiler was all booked and I would have to find another place to stay. So after I learned what time I had to be there tomorrow, Daddy and Jimmy Snow and I went out to look for a new hotel.

The only vacancy we found was the Hotel Dixie on the other side of town. It is pretty seedy, but it will be all right for a week.

Daddy went down in the lobby and made a phone call. After he came back, he gave me the number of the Veterans’ Cab Company. When I have to go over to the Dinkier Tutwiler, I am to call that number and ask for Cab No. 22, whose driver is an old drinking buddy of his and will take good care of me. I hoped his old buddy wasn’t still drinking because I didn’t feel like being killed after I had come this far. Daddy and Jimmy said good-bye and wished me luck and headed on back to Hattiesburg.

I sure hope I do well tomorrow. We finished off Aunt Bess’s black-eyed peas and collard greens on the way up here. I don’t feel so hot right now.

Kay Bob Benson! Do you believe it?

This morning I called the number Daddy gave me and Cab No. 22 arrived in about five minutes. The driver, whose name was Mr. Smith, was pretty old and didn’t talk much. From the way the cab smelled, Daddy was dead wrong about him quitting drinking, but he was a safe driver and very courteous and called me “miss.” When I got to the Dinkier Tutwiler, I had on the new suit the Cecilettes had given me, and I was glad. All the girls were wearing nice clothes.

The first day is called “Get Acquainted Day.” We were handed name tags and heard a speech in this big banquet room by Mrs. Lulie Harde McClay, the woman in charge, who had started the Miss Mississippi pageant in 1929. She spoke to us about how important it was to behave like southern ladies during the coming week, and how Miss Mississippi represented the image of southern womanhood. We were to remember there was only one winner and lots of losers, but losers shouldn’t feel bad because it was an honor even to be in the pageant. Then she introduced us to the chaperones and judges. There are six judges: Mrs. Peggy Buchanan, president of the Junior League of Mississippi; Mr. Harrison Swanley, a famous Mississippi painter; last year’s Miss Mississippi, Audrey Jones Sommers; Madame Rosa Albergotti, opera teacher and ex-opera star; Mr. Oliver Henry, the vice-president of the Jaycees, who sponsored the pageant; and Dr. Daniel A. Deady, preacher of the Mount Holy Oak Baptist Church in Tupelo. All the new girls in the contest are to come tomorrow morning, prepared to do their talent numbers.

As we were getting ready to leave, Kay Bob Benson walked over and said at the top of her voice, “Daisy Fay Harper, I just knew it was you that got out of that old pickup truck yesterday.”

I replied, “Yes, it was, and wasn’t that you getting off a broom?”

A big, fat girl standing there heard the whole thing and
started to laugh. She said, “Hey kid, where are you going?”

I told her I had to get back to the truck stop.

She laughed, “Come on up to our room. We’re having a little party.” I didn’t have anything else to do, so I went.

A sign on the door said, “Miss Mississippi Veterans of Foreign Wars, Chaperones Stay Out.” Inside I met three other girls. They had all rented the suite together and had been in the pageant for three years in a row. This was the last year they could enter. The fat girl, Darcy Lewis, said the only reason they were there was to get scholarships to college. They asked if I wanted a drink. I said, “Sure,” so they locked the door, Darcy went into the bathroom and got a bottle of Old Granddad out of the back of the toilet, and another girl named Mary Cudsworth pulled a bottle of scotch out of a Kotex box. They had a whole bar set up.

Darcy Lewis is in college at Stephens, majoring in speech, and her talent number is a scene from
Joan of Arc
that she has done for the past three years. Mary said Darcy is just too lazy to work on something new. Mary is a musician majoring in music at the University of Mississippi, and Penny Raymond is a singer. She’s about six feet tall, piles her hair up on her head and wears drop earrings. Jo Ellen Feely, the fourth girl, is majoring in political science at a college called Goucher. All she wanted to talk about was socialism. Whenever she tried to, the other girls screamed at her to shut up.

They asked me all about myself and if I wanted to be Miss Mississippi. I said, “No, I want to win the scholarship to the American Academy of Dramatic Art in New York.” They seemed pleased. None of them were competing for that one. They told me the contest was fixed and this girl named Margaret Poole was going to win. Mrs. Lulie Harde McClay always picks the winner and this time she promised it to the Poole girl, who she’s been grooming to be Miss Mississippi for two years. According to them, Margaret Poole is the biggest hypocrite going. She smokes and drinks and screws boys all over town, but when she is around Mrs. McClay, butter wouldn’t melt in her mouth. Mrs. Lulie Harde McClay’s whole life has been devoted to getting a Miss Mississippi to be Miss America. They also told
me anybody who did not come from a good family and was not a Protestant didn’t have a chance in hell. It was a good thing I didn’t want to win, because where it said religion, I put down “Pagan.”

They asked me about my talent number. Because I did comedy, they all agreed I had a good chance to make the finals if I was any good. Most of the girls are interpretive dancers and they like to have a variety of different talent numbers for the big pageant at the State Theater on the ninth.

We sat there most of the night, and I drank all those girls under the table. They must have liked me because before I left, they invited me to come back tomorrow. They also made me promise to vote for Darcy for Miss Congeniality. She’s won for three years and is collecting Miss Congeniality statuettes as a hobby. Every year she goes around and tells all the other girls that she is going to vote for them. Then they vote for her and she votes for herself, so she’s a shoo-in. The judges got suspicious last year when the vote was unanimous.