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Authors: Peter Cheyney

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BOOK: Dames Don’t Care
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"I don't know," she says, lookin' out across the desert, "but I believe that whoever she was, she was the wife of the man who wrote the anonymous letter."

"How'd you get that idea?" I ask her.

"For this reason," she says. "The letter was handwritten, and it was in a manly hand. In one place before the writer used the words 'this woman' I could see that something had been scratched out. I looked at it through a magnifying glass and under the attempt at erasure I could see the words 'my wife'. I guessed he had been going to refer to his wife and thought better of it."

"Have you got the letter? I ask her.

"I'm afraid I lost it," she says.

I get up.

"OK, lady," I tell her. "I'm believin' your story because I always trust a good-lookin' dame - once! If it's true, well, that's OK, an' if it's not I bet I'll catch you out somewhere. Stick around an' don't worry your head too much. Maybe something will break in a minute, but right now this bezusus looks to me like a mah-jong game played backwards."

She looks at me and sorta smiles. Her eyes are shinin' an' there is a sorta insolence about her that goes well with me. This Henrietta has got guts all right I guess.

"You've got it in for me, haven't you," she says. "Right from the beginning I've felt that everything you say and do is to one end, the pinning of this counterfeit business on me. Maybe you'll accuse me of killing Granworth next. You're tough all right, Mr Caution."

"You're dead right, honeybunch," I tell her. "What's the good of a guy if he ain't tough. Me - I think you're swell. I reckon that I ain't seen many dames around like you. You got class-if you know what I mean, an' I like the way you move around an' talk. In a way I'm sorry that you're so stuck on Maloney because maybe if things was different I'd like to run around with a dame like you. But you see they ain't different, an' I've got a job to do an' I'm goin' to do it even if you don't like it. So long, an' I'll be seem' you."

I scram down the steps of the porch an' go around the back an' get my car. I am so tired that I am almost seem' double an' I reckon that I am goin' to call it a day an' get back to the hotel an' have a piece of bed.

I have got about five miles away from the Hacienda an' am passing a place where the road narrows down an' there is a joshua tree standin' way back off the road in front of some scrub on a hillock when somebody has a shot at me. The bullet hits the steerin' wheel, glances off an' goes through the wind shield.

I pull a fast one. I tread on the brakes, slew the wheel round an' drive the car into a cactus bush just as if I was shot. Then I slump over the wheel an' lie doggo with one eye open.

I wait there for a coupla minutes an' nothin' happens. Then, over the back of the patch of scrub, in the moonlight, I see somebody movin'. As he gets out into the open I go after him. He starts to scram out of it an' this guy can certainly run. I let him go because I have got another idea. I go back to the car, turn her round an' step on it. I drive straight back to the Hacienda an' ask if Fernandez is there. They say be ain't, that maybe he won't be around tonight. I find Periera an' ask him where Fernandez is livin' an' he tells me that he has gotta cabin just off the Indio road. I find out where this place is an' I start to drive there pronto.

As I go speedin' down this road towards Indio I begin to think that this desert is a belluva place for things to happen. Some of these guys who are always talkin' about the wide open spaces might not think that deserts are so good if they got around on 'em a bit more.

Presently I see this dump. It is a white cabin fifty yards off the road, railed in with some white fencin' an' white stones. I pull up the car by the side of the road an' I ease over to the cabin. There is a window by the side of the door an' I look through an' there, sittin' at a table smokin' a cigarette an' drinkin' rye all by himself, is Fernandez.

I knock on the door an' after a minute he comes over an' opens it

"What do you want, copper?" he says.

"Get inside an' shut your trap, Fernandez," I tell him. "Because to me you are just one big bad smell, an' if I have any trouble outa you I am goin' to hurt you plenty."

He goes inside an' I go after him. He hands over a chair an' I sit down an' take a look around.

The cabin is a nice sorta place. It is furnished comfortable an' there is plenty of liquor kickin' around. I light a cigarette an' look at Fernandez.

He is standin' in front of the hearth lookin' at me. He is a lousy-lookin' guy an' I think that I should like to give him a good smack in the puss with a steam shovel, just so that he wouldn't think he was so good.

I have got an idea as to how I am goin' to play this so-an'so along. I reckon that there was never a crook who wouldn't do a trade if he thought that he could do himself some good that way.

"Listen, Fernandez," I tell him. "It looks to me I ain't popular around here, some guy has tried to iron me out tonight while I am goin' back to Palm Springs, but he wasn't quite good enough an' he just dented the steerin' wheel an' bust the wind screen. I suppose you wouldn't know anything about that, Fernandez?"

He looks at me like he was surprised.

"You don't think I'm such a mug, do you?" he says. "What good do I do by tryin' to bump you? You tell me that."

"I wouldn't know," I tell him, "but there's somebody around here has got one in for me - but maybe it's Periera."

"I don't get that," he says. "Why should he wanta bump you?"

"I wouldn't know that either," I say. "However, I ain't partial to guys shootin' at me, an' I just wanta know which side you're on, so you listen to me."

I help myself to some of his rye.

"Thanks for the drink," I say. "Now here's how it goes. It looks to me like I am goin' to make a pinch down here pretty soon, an' I'll give you two guesses as to who it is. Well, it's little Henrietta. That dame looks screwy to me an' I believe she knows a dum sight more about Granwortli Aymes' death than a lotta people think. OK. Well, the thing is this. There is some dame who is playin' around with Granworth Aymes an' this dame's husband is supposed to write some letter to Henrietta tellin' her that he is bein' a naughty boy an' that she'd better do something about it, Well, either that story is true or it ain't true.

"Now I hear that you are stuck on marryin' Henrietta. Whether that is a true bill or not I don't know, but I know one thing an' that is this that you were Aymes' chauffeur, an' you usta drive him around, an' if he was stuck on some woman you would know who it was."

"I was for Henrietta," he says, "an' I offered to marry her when she was broke an' hadn't any friends, but maybe after that phoney bond business I sorta changed my mind. I don't say she ain't a very attractive number," he goes on, "but I don't know that a guy is justified in marryin' a dame who is gettin' herself all mixed up in counterfeitin' stuff an' who may have been takin' time out together, don't it?

I do some quick thinkin' because this is a very interestin' situation. You will remember that Burdell told me that he was all for Henrietta until he suspected her of the counterfeitin' job, an' here is another guy who was supposed to be hot for marryin' her pullin' the same story. It looks like these guys have been takin' time out together, don't it.

"Looky, Fernandez," I say. "Here's the way it is. It's goin' to be pretty easy for me to find out whether Aymes was runnin around with a woman if I get the boys in New York on the job, but I reckon you can save me the trouble. I'm goin' to make a bargain with you, although I don't often do a deal with a lousy two timer like you, an' the bargain is this. I want the truth outa you about this woman that Aymes was supposed to be gettin' around with, an' I wanta know what was goin' on. If you llke to cash in well an' good. If not, I'm pinchin' you here an' now on a charge of attemptin' to murder a Federal Agent because I think that you were the guy who had a shot at me way back on the Palm Springs road."

His eyes start poppin'.

"Say listen, Caution," he says. "You can't say that. I can produce about six guys who will say I was around with them all the evenin'. Besides, anything you wanta know I'll be glad to tell you."

"OK," I say, "listen to this."

I then tell the story that Henrietta has told me. He stands there smokin' an' listenin'. When I have finished he starts in.

"I reckon that she is stringin' you along," he says with a grin. "It stands to reason that since you know she was in New York on that night she has gotta have some sorta story to give a reason for bein' there. If she ain't got a reason then it looks as if she just came down from Connecticut for some other reason that she don't want you to know-such as bumpin' her husband off. I reckon that she made up that story about the other dame.

"I used to get around with Aymes a lot," he goes on. "I usta drive him around the place an' he had dames all over the place, the usual sorta dames, but there wasn't anything special about that. There wasn't any special one that he went for. Nope, there was just a whole lot of 'em an' I could make you outa list of 'em if you want it. But I reckon you'd be wastin' your time."

"OK," I say. "Now you listen to me, Fernandez. An hour ago some palooka has a shot at me an' tries to iron me out. Now that mighta been you or it mighta been Henrietta or it mighta been Maloney or it mighta been Periera. Well, as the professors say, for the sake of this argument, I am goin' to say it was you."

I slip my hand under my coat an' I pull my Luger outa the shoulder holster an' cover him with it.

"Look, sweetheart," I say. "I have gotta reputation for bein' plenty tough, an' I am goin' to be tough with you. If I have any nonsense outa you I'm goin' to drill you. Then I'm goin' to say that it was you who tried to bump me earlier tonight; that I followed you out here to pinch you an' that you tried another shot an' then I shot an' killed you, an' how do you like that?"

He stands there an' I can see that he is beginnin' to sweat. "An' if you don't want me to do that," I tell him, "you're goin' to tell me the name of that dame who was kickin' around with Aymes. There was one, an' I wanta know who it was. If you ain't made up your mind who she was an' where she is livin' right now, by the time that I can count up to ten, I am goin' to give it to you in the guts. See?"

He don't say anything. I start countin'.

When I have got to nine he puts his hand up. His forehead is covered with sweat an' I can see his hands tremblin'.

"OK," he says. "You win. The dame's name is Paulette Benito, an' she's livin' at a dump called Sonoyta just off the Arizona line, in Mexico."

"Swell," I tell him, putting the gun away.

I get up.

"I'll be seem' you, Fernandez," I crack, "an' while I am away don't you do anything your mother wouldn't like to know about."

CHAPTER 7

GOOFY STUFF

 

I
DRIVE back to the Hacienda.

On my way I am thinkin' plenty. I am thinkin' that this guy Fernandez knows a durn sight more than he is lettin' on. I reckon that he only blew this stuff about the dame Paulette Benito just because he was afraid that I was goin' to blast a bunch of daylight into him, an' even then I don't think he woulda come clean if he hadn't thought that I'd known something about a dame anyway.

But I am very interested in the way this guy tries to bust down Henrietta's story about there bein' some other woman. It is a cinch that this Fernandez an' Burdell are workin' together on some set-up that they have thought out, but just what they are gettin' at - search me, I just don't know.

An' for all I know Fernandez an' Burdell an' Henrietta an' Maloney can be all playin' along together, I've known crooks put on good acts before an' when you come to think of it I know just as much about this bezusus as when I started in. All the way along the thing has got sorta confused with new people an' things bustin' in.

But one thing is stickin' outa foot. Both Langdon Burdell an' Fernandez want me to think that Henrietta bumped Granworth off. Everything they have done an' said is calculated to get my mind workin' that way. What are they gettin' at?

I reckon that I have gotta get next to this Paulette Benito. Because I reckon that she is goin' to be able to tell me more about Granworth Aymes than anybody else. If she was the woman he was chasin' around after, an' if he thought enough of her to give a swell dame like Henrietta the go-by for her, then she must have some little thing that the others haven't got She must have plenty, an' I reckon that Granworth never had any secrets from her.

Because, an' I expect you have noticed this too, a bad guy always likes to kid himself that he is goin' for a good dame, but in the long run he always makes a play for some jane who thinks along the same lines as he does. He does this because she always talks the same sorta language an' believes in the same sorta things. Maybe Henrietta made Granworth feel like two cents just because she was so much better than he was an' so he takes a run out powder an' hitches up with this Paulette, who knows how to play him along. In nine cases outa ten like goes for like.

I remember some high-hat jane in Minnesota. Her pa wanted her to get hitched to some young bible-student who was kickin' about the place, but she wouldn't have it at any price. She goes off one night an' she runs away with a two-gun man who finally gets fried for murder, after which she comes back an' marries the church guy with a contented mind. I reckon that if she hadn't gone off with the other guy she wouldn'ta been able to appreciate the bible-puncher.

There is one idea that I have got in my head an' that sorta sticks. It is that Burdell an' Fernandez an' anybody else who is playin' in with them woulda expected me to have pinched Henrietta before now. After all I have got evidence that she was in New York that night. I am entitled to suppose that she know somethin' about the counterfeitin' an' most people woulda pulled her in before now - as a material witness at least.

An' the reason why I have not done this is just because I have got this idea that they expect me to do it, an' I am a guy who never does what other people expect. That is why I told Fernandez the story that Henrietta had told me. I wanted to see what his reaction to it was, an' sure as a gun the big palooka starts to throw it down, even though, if what he told me before was true, he didn't know anything about what had happened that night in New York because he was stickin' around at his own place.

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