Damien: Billionaire Bad Boy Romance (12 page)

“I need you,” Damien said in a husky voice. I heard the soft swish of him tearing his clothes off and tossing them to the floor. The bed groaned from our combined weight as he crawled towards me and pulled me into his warm, muscular arms.

Damien smelled heavenly. I closed my eyes and inhaled as he pressed his lips against mine. His chest was smooth, muscled, and it sent shivers of lust through me as we touched. As we kissed, Damien reached behind my back and neatly unclasped the uncomfortable silk bra. He tossed it to the floor and I moaned softly into his mouth, grateful and relieved to feel my breasts swinging loose.

“Ride me,” Damien commanded. He got onto his back and stroked his cock up and down, watching me with an evil gleam of lust in his eye. I gasped at the sight of him naked—he was so beautiful; I couldn’t stand it. Just seeing him was enough to make me want to come, and I couldn’t tear the silky panties away from my pussy fast enough.

Nervously, I crawled towards Damien. He grabbed my hips and pulled me on top of him, spreading my legs and thrusting upward until his cock buried itself in the warmth and wetness of my pussy. The sensation was incredible. I let out a yelp, then closed my eyes and savored the feeling all over my body. As Damien grabbed my hips and shoved me back and forth on his cock, I moaned. His pubic bone kept rubbing against my clit with every thrust, and I could barely even breathe. The sensation that was building in my lower belly was amazing—like before, when Damien was going down on me, but better. I closed my eyes and ground my hips hard against his muscular body until tears came to my eyes. Beneath me, Damien was groaning and straining every muscle until he was tense and stiff. His cock filled me so completely that I couldn’t move. I couldn’t think of anything but fucking him, it was all I wanted to do, forever.

Damien grabbed my wrists in one of his strong hands and pulled my arms over my head until I was lying flat against him, my nipples rubbing his chest. Every cell of my body was stimulated, everything felt so incredibly good that I didn’t couldn’t handle it. As we moved together, Damien’s other hand began to roam around my ass. First he squeezed my cheeks, then slipped a finger between the globes.

“Someday, Audrey, I’m going to fuck you in the ass,” Damien whispered softly into my ear.

An electric thrill went through me at the sound of his words and I felt his cock plunge deeper inside my pussy than ever before. The sensation was astonishing and I held my breath as it grew and grew, feeling like something was gripping me strongly between the legs. Before I knew it, I was crying out and beating my fists against the headboard, coming so hard that tears were leaking down my cheeks. My reaction set Damien off and he grabbed me and thrust up inside me harder than ever, bucking and groaning like a prize stallion beneath me.

When it was over, Damien gently pushed me to the side. He lay on his back, staring straight at the ceiling. “All of those clothes are yours,” he said softly. “I bought them all for you.”

I gaped at him. “Damien, what am I gonna do with all that stuff?”

He chuckled. “You’ll find a way to use it all, I’m sure,” he replied. “I mean, you’re a woman. You love clothes, right?”

I frowned, rolling onto my side and staring at the wall. That was just the thing—even though I felt like a real woman with Damien, I still worried about not being the kind of woman that he’d want to spend the rest of his life with. There was nothing special about me, I was just plain Audrey Turner, twenty-two years old and a tiny mouse in one of the world’s biggest cities.

“Thanks,” I said reluctantly.

Damien didn’t reply. When I rolled back over, I saw that he’d fallen asleep.

I couldn’t sleep. I lay next to Damien in his silken bed with the lights out, marveling at how much quieter it was up here on the thirty-fifth floor. Back in my apartment in Pilsen, I felt like I was practically outside.

I couldn’t relax. Even though we’d just had amazing sex following an almost-equally amazing meal, something was ticking like mad inside my brain. No matter what I did, no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t quite manage to turn it off.

Finally, I slipped out of bed. There was a turquoise silk kimono-style robe on my side of the bed and I figured that it was meant for me. Slipping it on made me feel glamorous, but I quickly realized how impractical the silk was: the sleeves slipped past my hands and buried them, making me feel like a kid playing dress-up in her mom’s clothes. The material felt good against my naked skin, though, and I belted it closely as I padded out to the kitchen.

All of the lights in Damien’s condo had been turned out and I watched in silent awe as the skyline flickered. It was still pitch black outside, and Pepper was snoring soundly on the floor of the kitchen, but even seeing her didn’t make me feel confident and better about what had just happened. It was impossible to relax, or feel like I was at home. After all, I barely even
knew
Damien. I had no idea what kind of guy he was. Besides salad and lamb, I had no idea what he even liked to eat. The gelato from earlier was still opened and the spoon rested on the shiny counter, leaving a sticky puddle behind as I placed it in the sink. There was no sponge or roll of paper towels, or anything even
resembling
cleaning supplies. I gulped and turned back towards the incredible view from the living room.

Pepper must have sensed my presence; she got up and padded over to me, gently whining and pushing her head against my legs.

“I bet you’re thirsty, huh?” I rubbed her ears and started digging around in Damien’s cabinets for a bowl to use for her water dish. The contents were as meticulous as I would expect: everything facing the front, all utensils grouped together, everything looking as neat and orderly as a model home. Like Damien didn’t even
live
here.

Pepper whined as I finally found a plain-looking white ceramic dish and filled it with water before setting it down on the floor. She nosed the bowl over to the corner, slopping water over the sides, before flopping down on her belly and drinking in long, contented gulps.

Even knowing that she was better didn’t make me feel relaxed. I felt tense, like I was on edge. Like this whole thing was just some kind of obvious, stupid joke. Like I was just waiting for Damien to wake up and realize that he didn’t actually want to be with me.

“Pepper, come here,” I said in a low voice, beating my hand against my thigh. But she was still drinking, and I knew that I couldn’t pull her away. With a sigh, I walked into the living room and flopped down on the taut black leather couch. The room which had seemed so tense and full of sexuality earlier didn’t seem to be doing much for the way I felt. Whenever I looked out at the huge, domineering skyline, I just felt empty inside.

I thought about my parents, what they’d say if they saw me in a place like this. The only advice Mom had ever given me—besides “keep your head down and work harder than you think you need to”—was to find a good man, someone wealthy, someone who’d take care of me. It had never been a priority, but now I wondered if it was something I’d wanted along.

I swallowed hard.
I love him
, a voice chimed in from the back of my mind.
I love him and I don’t know what to do about it
.

I was faced with an interesting dilemma: either I could tell Damien how I felt, or try to assume that he’d just know. But I knew deep down, Damien wouldn’t know. He was used to women falling in love with him, but I didn’t even know how to show how I felt. I finally understood all of the romantic comedies that I’d seen over the years, and all the jokes about feeling stupid and breathless around the object of your desire. I’d never thought that would become me. I was flustered and awkward around almost everyone, except for Carl. It didn’t seem right that I would be tongue-tied around someone like Damien, at least not more so than I already felt.

My mouth felt dry and my head was twanging with the beginning of a headache. I thought about going to Damien’s bathroom and rifling through the cabinets for some ibuprofen, but the mere thought was exhausting. I didn’t want to get up, and I certainly didn’t want to wake him up. He was the kind of man who rarely slept, and I had a feeling this was the first sleep he’d gotten in quite a while.

Finally, Pepper finished drinking and walked back over to me, her toenails clicking on the hard wood. She whined a little and looked up at me with her big brown eyes.

“Sorry, Pep-pup,” I told her regretfully. “I don’t think Mr. Damien would like you on his couch very much. This is leather.”

Pepper made a sighing noise and sunk down on the floor. I could tell that she was anxious, too. What was I doing here? Why had Damien even brought me here in the first place?

To seduce me
, I realized with a sinking feeling in my chest.
He brought me here to fuck me again
. The words felt strange and clunky in my mouth, like they were inaccurate. But I knew that I wasn’t wrong—that was exactly why we’d come here. Damien knew what he was getting into when he’d brought me home.

I sighed. I wanted to talk to someone,
anyone!
But I had no idea to whom I could turn. Everything was muddled and complicated. Of course, I realized that the only person I really needed to speak with was Damien. But he wouldn’t listen. I had a sinking feeling that he’d masterfully shut down any kind of relationship talk before it even had a chance to stick.

That was the kind of guy he was. I bit my lip, thinking of Karen. Would I become like her? Or would I just be fired?

This whole thing was giving me a headache. I didn’t even know what I wanted. I thought I wanted Damien, but I knew that I couldn’t afford to lose my job. Whenever we were in the same room, all I could think about was him and his hands on me, how they were going to make me feel. And then whenever we parted ways, the anxiety and the doubt would begin to creep in almost as soon as he was out of sight. I thought of him snoring away in the bedroom, completely oblivious that I was out here and feeling discomfort. But then again, I wouldn’t have wanted him to know that I was hurting. I felt private about my pain, like I didn’t even deserve to wallow. After all, I’d gotten myself into this mess. I’d let him seduce me, and I’d loved it.

Pepper barked and I jolted up on the couch. “Pepper!” I scolded. “Hush!” She looked at me and thumped her tail on the floor. I sighed. If we were at home, I’d bundle up and take her outside. But as it stood, I had no idea how to even get back inside Damien’s condo. The inside was almost like a maze, and I had no idea where he kept his keys. I didn’t want to risk waking him up. Would he be mad that I’d slipped out of bed? Would he be grouchy? What was a guy like Damien even
like
in the morning? I couldn’t imagine seeing him without his fancy suit and perfect hair.

I coughed once, then lay down on my back. The silk robe hadn’t warmed up to my skin and the touch of the fabric against me was startlingly and alarming chill. The couch felt solid and hard underneath me—comfortable to sit on, but not exactly for a nap. There weren’t even any pillows or throw blankets. It was like the most sterile living room that I’d ever seen in my life.

Suddenly, I knew that I wouldn’t be able to sleep. I sat up and pulled an elastic off my wrist, making a ponytail with my hair and knotting it at the nape of my neck. I motioned for Pepper to stay, then walked in the bedroom and tossed the silk robe on the floor. After a second thought, I picked it up and gently folded it and put it on the bed. The slippery material made it nearly impossible to leave looking neat, but I didn’t want to offend Damien more than I had to.

It took me a few minutes to find my jumper, turtleneck, leggings, bra, and panties in the dark. Damien had scattered my clothes on the floor of the dressing room and I dressed quickly, feeling a snake slipping back into her old, discarded skin. I set my mouth in a thin line and looked in the mirror. I looked exactly the same as I always had, not trussed up in expensive silk nightclothes like some kind of trophy wife.

“It’s better this way,” I said to my own reflection, startled at the huskiness of my voice. Walking into the living room, I called for Pepper and quickly pulled a leash out of my purse. “We’re going home, Pep,” I told her softly, rubbing her ears. “We don’t belong here.”

I was afraid of who I was becoming when I was with Damien, pure and simple. Pulling off the silk robe had really made me realize it: it didn’t matter what he said about clothing. I got that he had a point about the office—thinking about embarrassing him with my sartorial decisions made me feel horrible—but if we were going to be together, I was going to keep my clothes.

“That’s right, Pep,” I told her as we waited on the frigid El platform for the next train. It was so cold that for a moment, I’d regretted my decision to leave Damien’s toasty condo. I wish I could have called a cab, but I didn’t want to spend any money. Not knowing how much longer I’d have a job was definitely taking a toll on me.

Pepper wagged her tail, then sat down and whined at the cold platform. I winced and reached down, stroking her soft fur with my gloved hand. As I stamped my feet, I checked the time table—the nearest train was still twenty minutes away. It was sometime after midnight, and I was lucky that I’d managed to catch the last one at all. Even though it would probably take me over an hour to get home, I was glad that I’d left. I didn’t want Damien to wake up, and I cringed when I thought of his reaction about the clothes. After all, I didn’t think what I’d done was gracious. Another girl, probably any other girl, would have taken the clothes. But I didn’t want to let Damien, the man I loved, change who I was inside. I didn’t want to become mean and superficial like Karen or those other girls he’d slept with. After all, if he liked me for me, he’d understand that.

Assuming that he likes you and you’re not just another notch in his bedpost. Haven’t you ever heard about virgin fetish?
I shuddered as the small voice in my head popped up, determined to undermine how I was feeling. I hated that I couldn’t think anything without doubting myself. I envied Damien—that didn’t seem like a problem that he ever struggled with. He was the kind of guy who didn’t let anything faze him. Or at least, not that he showed.

Pepper rubbed against my legs. I could feel that she was cold and I felt guilty, but there was nowhere else to go. After sunset, the Loop usually got pretty deserted. Only rich people like Damien could afford to live downtown, and most people who worked in the office buildings went home to their suburbs or other neighborhoods. It felt eerie, almost like a ghost town. I’d rarely been downtown past closing hour, and it was definitely the first time I’d taken the late train by myself. I knew that I shouldn’t be afraid—after all, my weekly shifts at Helping Hands were probably more dangerous than anything else—but the crime rate in Chicago had skyrocketed as of late. Suddenly, I was nervous that I wouldn’t even
make
it home.

Pepper whined again. “I know, girl, you didn’t have dinner, but we’ll have some meatballs when we get home, okay?” She whimpered, rubbing her face against my legs. I rubbed my hands together, my fingers were starting to go numb even in my fleece gloves. As I looked out over the tracks, there was a weird scraping noise, seemingly from underneath the platform. I jumped a foot in the air. Suddenly, I was actually scared. I wanted to go home. Hell, I didn’t just want to go home, I wanted to be with Damien. A lump swelled up in my throat as I thought of him, warm and snuggled in his bed, not four blocks from where I stood.

“It’s okay, Pepper,” I said nervously. “We’re going to be okay.” She barked and I felt a slight surge of confidence—maybe whoever was out there wouldn’t want to mess with me knowing that I had a dog. As she got up and paced around me in a little circle, I strained and listened in vain for the sound again.

The air was silent. My nose tingled with the cold, and when I looked up into the inky black sky, I saw tiny flakes of snow coming down towards my face.
Great
, I thought sourly.
That’s just awesome. Now I’ll be a brick of ice by the time the train gets here. Maybe Pepper can drag me onboard
. Stamping my feet in a useless effort to warm up, I finally saw a flicker of light all the way at the end of the platform. As the train approached, the platform shook and quivered with the weight of the train. Gratefully, I took off my gloves and started to blow on my frozen hands. They were so cold that my breath felt like an icy blast and I cried out in pain, shoving my hands deep inside the pockets of my jumper.

When the doors of the train opened, I hurled myself inside. It was hot and sour-smelling—there was a homeless person curled up on the bench across from me—but I was so grateful to be out of the cold that I didn’t even mind. Pepper curled up on the bench and rested her head on my lap. Closing my eyes, I relaxed and let my head thump against the window. I didn’t want to watch as the train pulled out of the station and away from Damien. I couldn’t bear it.

Shifting in my seat, I wondered if he’d be unhappy with me for leaving. He was both possessive and controlling. Oddly, I didn’t mind as long as I could exercise some degree of autonomy. I wasn’t going to change my life for Damien, but I didn’t mind a little domination in the bedroom.

Pepper whined. “Hush,” I said softly. “It’s not my fault that thinking about him makes me so hot and bothered.” She whined and thumped her tail against the seat. “I know, girl,” I said as I rubbed her ears. “I know. It’s late. We’ll be home soon.”

As the El train hurtled through the darkness, carrying me up and away from the city, I felt a strange sense of calm blanket my limbs. There were so many mornings that I’d seen women, still clad in evening clothes with lipstick clinging to their mouths, struggling on the train. I was finally one of them. I was finally one of those girls who stayed out all night a guy’s and then returned home in the wee hours of the morning. Even though it was miserable and cold outside, I could tell that it was just before dawn. I didn’t entirely feel good about my revelation. For all the happiness that Damien brought me, I still wasn’t sure that I’d be able to do a good job maintaining my life without him.

We screeched to a stop and my stomach froze. The homeless man across the aisle from me didn’t even stir as the lights on the train blinked on and off. Suddenly, I felt just afraid as I had back on the platform. Chicago at night was an entirely different creature than Chicago during the safe daylight hours, and I couldn’t wait until I was home and snuggled on the couch with Pepper. It was almost daylight, which meant that I could maybe shower and nap for an hour or so before going into work.

The train finally reached Pilsen and I gently pushed Pepper off the bench as we exited the train. The first pinky-grey streaks of dawn were starting in a far-off corner of the sky and I closed my eyes and breathed in deep. I was too far away from Lake Michigan to smell anything fresh, but it smelled like home all the same. My home, where there wasn’t a single silk item in the whole apartment. I grinned to myself as Pepper and I jogged up the stairs. Sure, it wasn’t Damien’s luxe high-rise, but it was what we knew.

Pepper barked and growled, stopping dead in her tracks as I took my keys out. I looked down and saw that the fur on the back of her neck was sticking straight up.

“Girl, what’s wrong?” I asked in a soothing tone. I reached down to stroke her and she tensed again, growling and backing away from the door. “Pepper? Did something happen?”

Frowning, I looked at the door. Everything looked fine—it hadn’t been broken, or jammed open. Still, a sense of fright and unease descended over me. Pepper never acted up unless something was really wrong. What did she know that I didn’t?

“Pepper, come on,” I insisted. “Stop being such a silly goose. You’re coming with me girl, okay?” She dug her paws into the wooden landing and refused to move, growling and barking sharply. I winced. “Pepper, hush!” I scolded her. “We have neighbors!” My mouth went dry and my heart started to beat faster in my chest as I slowly pushed the door open. For a moment, everything looked fine.

Then my eyes adjusted and I let out a scream of fright. The inside of my apartment had been completely ransacked. The kitchen was a mess—all of the doors to the pantry were open and everything had been pulled out and tossed on the floor. I felt shocked, like someone had poured a bucket of ice water over my head. Pepper growled again and I gripped her leash tightly, pulling her inside the door with me.

“Hello?” I called loudly. My voice trembled and I cursed myself—I was the least intimidating woman out there! “Hello? Who’s there?”

There was no answer as I slowly slipped into the house, treading as lightly as I possibly could on the floor. Pepper strained and tugged at the leash. She pulled me into the living room and I let out a small gasp. It was completely destroyed, even more so than the kitchen had been. The couch had been ripped apart—stuffing and slashed cushions littered the floor—and my TV was broken and smoking on the ground. I winced as I tread over some broken glass. It crunched under my boots, sending a scary tremor through my body.

I bit my lip as tears welled up in my eyes. My whole apartment was ruined! What the hell was I supposed to do now? Taking a deep breath, I pulled out my cell phone. Damien was the last person I wanted to call, but I knew he was the only one I could turn to.

Pepper barked as I dialed his number.

“I know you don’t like him, Pep, but we don’t have a lot of options right now,” I said to her as I braced the phone between my shoulder and my cheek.

Pepper growled in response.