Dance with Deception: Scandalous Secrets, Book 1 - Exclusive Edition (Scandalous Secrets - Exclusive Edition) (34 page)

He arched his brow. “Is it working?”

“No, I can’t that say it is.” She brushed past him as she exited the salon, her dim lantern casting shadows upon the walls. “I’m going upstairs where there is a fire waiting. Would you like to join me?” she called over her shoulder.

He mumbled something under his breath, precisely what she wasn’t certain.

His footsteps on the marble behind her told her he was following close behind. Gwen climbed the stairs then proceeded past the family’s bedchambers to the guest wing. As she opened the door, she explained, “I didn’t want to be in my father’s rooms, or even in the family wing for that matter.”

Sebastian followed her into the sage colored room then glanced down the hallway through which they just traveled. “Are you certain that Victoria won’t try to flee again?”

“I am quite certain. I made it clear that running away wasn’t the answer and she agreed, after admitting that she fled for the sole purpose of
bringing us closer together.”

“Of course she did,” he released a jagged sigh, clearly exasperated by his sister’s methods then arched a black brow. “Are you sure she’s going to follow your instructions? This is my sister, after all.”

Gwen shook her head at his insistence. “You are hopeless. Would you like to camp outside her door? I’d be happy to show you where it is once my feet thaw.”

She pushed the overstuffed chaise closer to the grate ablaze with warm orange flames. “Feel free to move the ottoman if you’re not doing anything but gawking at me.”

Her husband snapped to attention. “Yes, ma’am.”

After settling into the comfortable chair, Gwen rubbed her hands together in a desperate attempt to warm them.

Sebastian sat atop the ottoman then lifted her bare feet before placing them on his lap.

Gwen stiffened from his touch. “You don’t need to do that. I am fine now.”

“Yes, I can see that from the lovely shade of blue your toes have become.” Sebastian began to massage her feet. “Relax, I wouldn’t be able to call myself a gentleman if I allowed my wife to freeze to death.”

His massage was working. Her entire traitorous body, not just her feet, warmed from his touch and her heart raced at a frantic pace as she remembered the way those same strong hands explored her body.

“You never answered my question downstairs.
What did you say to my sister to make her want to apologize to me?” His voice was smooth as silk.

Focus
. Gwen had to remind herself to focus on his words for his touch was distracting her beyond all reason.

“I reminded her that you have been a wonderful brother and that she should judge you based on that.”

“And…” Sebastian’s hands weren’t the only things distracting Gwen. His eyes, now a smoky blue, were unnerving her.

“I explained that she wasn’t meant to overhear our argument.”

His grin widened, as if he knew she was not imparting the whole truth. “Anything else?”

I told her I still loved you
. Gwen thought the words, but refused to voice them choosing instead to conceal such thoughts behind a bright smile. “That about covers it.”

She tried so hard not to concentrate on his dexterous hands but failed miserably.

“I don’t believe you.” He studied her through his heated gaze. “I think there’s more to it than that.”

Yes, there was more to it. She wanted him to kiss the pain away, to make love to her until her doubts and fears subsided.

His words, his stare, flustered her as did the progression of her own thoughts. Gwen decided to change the subject. “Why were you sitting outside?”

“The lights were out and I didn’t want to wake everyone.”

It was her turn to smirk. “So were you going to remain there all night?”

“I don’t know.”

“That’s funny,” she teased. “You never struck me as the indecisive type.”

“I’m not.” His gaze held hers. “I once told you I’d wait for you to come to me. Maybe I was waiting? You did come to me, did you not?”

“That’s not what you meant at the time.” Gwen’s heart pounded in her ears. His warm hands massaging her feet renewed those heavenly sensations that only Sebastian could conjure within her.

She wanted him to fill her, wanted to lose the emptiness that had become her soul since her confrontation with her father. Would that truly be wrong? He was her husband after all.

Her pride rebelled and she fought for a way to salvage it. If she made love to Sebastian without giving herself completely, would that suffice?

“What are you thinking?” His hands stilled.

“Nothing,” she lied then tucked her feet underneath her skirts, taking great care to ensure that he couldn’t touch her anymore.

Sebastian leaned into her, his elbows resting on her thighs, as he sat inches from her. His close proximity caused her heart to lurch in an involuntary response.

“That marks the second time tonight I don’t believe you.” His velvet timbre betrayed his intimacy.

Gwen didn’t move. She couldn’t. In truth, she didn’t want to.

“What are you thinking?” he asked again, this time his tone was husky.

“I don’t really know.” Gwen inspected the damask pattern in her gold gown in a deliberate attempt to avoid her husband’s gaze.

“Yes, you do.” He reached for her chin, tipping her head toward him. His voice was now seductive. “Don’t hide from me now.”

Gwen paused, inhaling a deep calming breath that failed to slow her rapid heartbeat. “What do you want me to say?”

“I want you to admit how angry you are with me.” Sebastian pushed a stray curl away from her face.

“I am furious with you.” Her tone was low. She meant it … for the most part.

He ran his thumbnail over one of the pleats in her skirt. She slapped his hand away, annoyed.

“You must believe me when I say,” he moved his thumb to another pleat, “I have no intention of changing your mind about that and asking your forgiveness again.”

Gwen smacked his hand again.

“I happen to find your flushed cheeks and clenched fists rather attractive.” He found another pleat.

Smack!
This time, he moved his hand just in time causing her to hit her own thigh. It further infuriated her.

In a grave tone, he added, “I lied to you and that was reprehensible. I know it was a serious offense for which I take full responsibility.”

“Do you know what infuriates me the most?”
Gwen whispered, leaning toward him.

He met her heated gaze. “I have a feeling you’re going to tell me.”

“Yes, I am.” She placed her thumbnail on a crease in his trousers. “What really infuriates me is the fact that I can never stay angry at you for very long. Hurt and disappointed, yes, but not angry.”

Sebastian gazed at her under hooded lids. “Why is that, do you suppose?”

“I don’t know.”

“Don’t you?” He leaned closer to her, close enough to kiss her as his warm, sweet breath lingered on her lips.

Her heart skipped a beat. “No, I don’t. The realization drives me mad.” She pinched his thigh.

“Ouch! What was that for?”

“Because you drive me crazy.”

“I think you love the fact that I do. It adds to my allure.” Sebastian smiled that dazzling smile that made her tipsy, his baritone honeyed. “I know you’re mulling something over in that brilliant brain of yours. Tell me what you’re thinking.”

Gwen’s eyes searched his. “I want to go back to the way we were but I refuse to be vulnerable again.”

“I’ve never known you to be fearful.”

“Well I am.” Her own honesty unnerved her. Was she exposing too much of herself to him? “I learned a lot of truths recently and the one commonality between each them is that I believed every lie that was told. From you, my father, even my mother.”

Sebastian brushed his thumb over her cheek. “I
understand.”

“Do you?” She watched him as he nodded. “I can’t be this close to you without remembering how intimate we were and wanting it again. Yet, try as I might, I cannot allow myself to trust you or myself for that matter.”

His thumb idly caressed her cheek then trailed to her jaw line. “We are in a quandary, aren’t we?”

Her eyes widened. “Do you think?” she asked, her question rhetorical.

“There’s only one solution.” Sebastian leaned closer to her then paused, heightening the suspense Gwen supposed.

So thrown off guard was she from his nearness, from his warmth, from his husky murmur, that she wasn’t prepared for his proposal.

“Make love to me, Duchess.” Sebastian’s impassioned plea sent her senses reeling.

Gwen felt as if the ground beneath her had just tilted. “I beg your pardon?”

“You heard me.” Sebastian kissed her neck.

She pushed him away then leapt from the chaise in an effort to create as much distance between them as possible. “What gave you the idea that we should—”

“Be intimate?” Sebastian finished for her, smiling behind his hand as he studied her pink cheeks and agitated state.

Gwen wanted him. She had admitted it to him. Why was she so surprised that her husband would need no further encouragement?

With every step Sebastian took towards her, his wife took one step backwards he noted with a sly
grin, failing to hide his amusement.

“You have lost your mind!” Gwen took one final step backward before bumping into the marble fireplace mantle.

Seizing his chance to corner her, Sebastian placed his hands on either side of his wife using the mantle for support. “What is so wrong with my proposition?”

“Where should I begin?” Gwen averted her eyes from his, her arms crossed in front of her.

Sebastian stood still, his feet planted firmly in front of her. He already knew that Gwen forgave him and that she loved him.

What more did they need?

Standing idle while his wife pondered when and where she would come to him made no sense whatsoever. He needed her to realize how much she needed him, how much she wanted him. Then and only then would Gwen truly belong to him again.

He proceeded with his plan confident that once his wife gave her body to him, her heart would follow suit.

“Answer me, Duchess, why are you hell-bent against making love to me tonight?”

Her voice was raspy. “I can’t give myself to you yet.”

Yet
. That one simple word sent Sebastian’s heart soaring. “Gwen, we love each other. What more do we need?”

He traced a path from her ear lobe to the nape of her neck with his index finger. Her soft skin quivered under his touch.

“We need trust, Sebastian.” Gwen inhaled a
ragged breath, clearly shaken by his nearness.

His hands hovered above her gown’s modest neckline. “I trust you, Duchess.”

He moved closer to her. Close enough to feel her chest rise and fall.

“That’s not what I meant,” she whispered. Her resolve was weakening.

And he knew it.

“I know what you meant and it will come in time.” Sebastian’s fingertips trailed up and down the slope of her graceful neck.

Her tone was unyielding. “I won’t lose myself in you again.”

His hand stilled. “Then let’s get lost in each other.”

For the first time since that awful day in the garden with her father, Gwen experienced something other than the emptiness that had drained her heart. Sebastian offered her an escape from the darkness that overwhelmed her and she was desperate for the reprieve.

“I won’t lose control,” she said it more to convince herself than her husband.

Sebastian’s soft lips traced a warm trail of kisses down her neck. “You don’t have to.”

Her resolve faltered as her yearning for him intensified.

“Think of it as my penance.” Sebastian’s throaty whisper betrayed his own urgent need for her.

He kissed the soft nape of her neck and Gwen leaned into him. It was a slight motion, but one she was certain he’d perceive as her resolve weakening.

“What will it be, Duchess?” There was a hint of challenge in his tone.

“Repent.” The word had escaped her lips before she could stop it. Then, just as Gwen began to fear that she had lost control, a wicked thought occurred to her.

“I think I know just the way.” Her tone was purposefully deep and seductive.

His azure eyes widened. “Am I going to like what you have in mind?”

Gwen knew by his response that she had succeeded in seizing control once again.

“That remains to be seen.” She reached for the waistband of his trousers then tugged, pulling him closer to her. “You trust me, don’t you?”

His voice was raspy. “I trust you.”

“Good,” just as Sebastian leaned forward to kiss her, Gwen pressed her index finger against his full lips. “I think your reparation should commence as follows. You will undress and lie on the bed.”

He grinned, “Not bad so far.”

Gwen reveled in the power she held over him, the control she had obtained at long last.

After placing his hand against the small of her back, Sebastian pulled her closer to him. “Tell me more.”

She unbuttoned the top two buttons of his pristine shirt then traced the path of several wispy strands of curly chest hair with her fingertips. “You cannot touch me until I advise you that you may.”

His hands fell to his sides, “Why not?” He sounded like a little boy being denied a sweet by his parents.

“Because this is your punishment, and no one said it would be easy.”

“All right,” he shook his hands as if to rid them of the urge to caress her. “What am I supposed to do?”

Her fingers traced a path to his torso. She heard his breath catch as she explored lower. “You are going to lie there like a good husband until I give you permission to participate.”

“This will be the longest night of my life,” he muttered.

Gwen grinned at the dejected expression that masked his bronzed features. “Are you certain you’re up for this, Your Grace?”

She had no idea the hidden meaning he derived from her words until he placed his hands on her derriere and crushed her against his length.

“I am certain that I’m up for this.”

Her eyes widened at his arousal, hardened as it was by the mere thought of things to come. “Well then, no more contact until I say so. Get undressed and lie on the bed.”