Dance with Deception: Scandalous Secrets, Book 1 - Exclusive Edition (Scandalous Secrets - Exclusive Edition) (6 page)

“It was similar for me,” he admitted. “Though I can’t remember a time when I wasn’t being groomed for my title.”

Gwen turned toward him. “You must have been a formidable child.”

Sebastian faced two choices. He could either give her a jovial answer, then move on to less sentimental subjects, or he could be honest.

He felt he could confide in Gwen with complete trust. It was evident in the telling depths of her brown eyes. No woman had ever touched his soul. No woman had even been close.

Until Gwen.

Though the thought terrified him and honesty was most certainly a risk, Sebastian seemed to crave risks where Gwen was concerned ever since encountering her at the Stocktons’ ball.

“I was a very sensitive lad. My mother and father got into many an argument about how to raise their heir. Mother believed it natural for a boy to show and receive affection.” His tone hardened. “Father, on the other hand, found it unacceptable for his heir to be emotional. I spent the first part of my childhood trying to discover why he didn’t love me.”

Gwen’s tone was gentle. “His kind of affection was different than yours, as was his way of showing it, but that doesn’t mean that he loved you any less.”

A memory of his mother sobbing on the floor filled Sebastian’s mind. It was the day he protected
her, standing up to the brute that was his father. He was careful to control his voice as he added, “I discovered quickly that I detested his version of love and wanted nothing of it.”

She remained mute, her russet eyes encouraging him to continue.

He returned his gaze to the bright sky above, squinting. “My father was a violent man and I don’t discuss him with anyone, not even Victoria.”

“Whether or not you discuss your father with Victoria, I am certain she is aware of your feelings. It is that way with my brothers.” She followed his gaze, basking in the sun’s warmth. “They don’t get along with my father. It’s what drove Colin away and it’s what keeps Tristan close. Neither trusts our father and Tristan feels the need to protect me.”

Gwen’s candid confidences caught Sebastian off guard and endeared her even more toward him, so much so that his heart welled within his chest. “Tristan is protecting you from your father?”

“And from myself,” she managed with a slight grin, her expression serene and proud. “He knows how much I love my father and how hard I have endeavored to make him happy ever since my mother’s passing. Even though it has yet to work, I never stop trying.”

Sebastian studied her as he tried to understand. “You spoke of the duty he imposed on your brothers. What is the duty your father imposes upon you?”

Gwen smoothed her skirts as she pondered his question. She then lifted her head, her chin held high, her body stiff as a board, posture proud and
her tone deep as she imitated her father. “It is a lady’s duty to be seen not heard.”

“You be seen and not heard?” His disbelief was evident in his tone. “Does he know the same young woman I do?”

“Tristan sees it the same way you do. My father doesn’t agree.”

Sebastian resisted the urge to lean closer to her and instead commented, “Tristan sounds like a wonderful brother to you.”

“Perhaps it’s the fact that we spent months in the womb together. We’ve always been inseparable. After our mother died, I don’t know how I would have survived without him.”

Sebastian frowned. “You were both still so young. Didn’t your father help you through it at all?”

“No. He never spoke of her and still refuses to do so. I believe it is too painful for him.” Her gaze met his. “Isn’t that the same reason you don’t discuss your feelings about your father with Victoria?”

“Yes,” he replied in a husky whisper. “Yes, I suppose it is.”

Gwen twirled one of the curls framing her face with her finger. “You said earlier that propriety is overrated in your opinion. Did you mean it?”

“I never say anything I don’t mean, Gwen, at least not to you.”

The magnetism of his smile and the warmth in his eyes shone through his statement causing her pulse to quicken.

“Not to me?” she asked, her voice shaky.

Sebastian’s eyes held hers, two sapphires shinning darker, richer by the moment. “I’ve told you more since the Stocktons’ ball than I have told most in a lifetime.”

An inexplicable happiness pulsated through Gwen, as her eyes remained locked with his. He was extraordinary and would make some lucky woman a wonderful husband. It dawned on her that she could never be that woman and disappointment surged through to her soul.

His baritone jarred her from her thoughts. “To what were you referring?”

“Something’s plagued me since we spoke earlier in your library.” Gwen paused before adding, “It isn’t my place to say anything. To do so would disregard all etiquette.”

“Go ahead,” he said. He then steeled his shoulders, as if bracing himself for battle.

“It’s about your estate management. This might sound odd to you, but I may have a solution.” Gwen studied him, gauging his mood.

Sebastian stood then offered her his hand. “Let me hear your solution as we walk.”

“You’re sure you don’t mind?” She paused in the act of reaching for his hand, her determination faltering.

“You have no choice but to continue as you’ve now piqued my interest.”

After she accepted his hand, Sebastian pulled her up. They hadn’t taken two steps before she began.

“You can run the estates yourself with little hassle. Hire an assistant to help. At this moment,
with what you are paying all of your managers, plus the expenses you are not aware of, you’re most likely losing money.”

He paused in mid-step. Gaping at her, he asked, “How do you know all of this?”

“Will what I say remain between us?”

“I’d never betray your confidence, Gwen.” His words carried a resolve she’d never before heard.

“I run my family’s estate in England. Everyone, with the exception of Tristan, believes it is the feat of my father.” She furrowed her brow. “Not even Papa is aware that I have been running Ainsley. He wouldn’t approve.”

“I don’t understand. Why doesn’t your father run his own estates?”

Gwen began to walk again, her gaze fixed straight ahead. “He runs all of them with the exception of Ainsley. He has wanted nothing to do with it since my mother’s passing. Once Colin left, he handed the responsibilities off to Tristan, who in turn allowed me to handle matters in secret.”

She tilted her head, expecting a chastising remark or a disdainful glance from him, but all she could see was admiration expressed in his chiseled features.

“Go on,” he coaxed. “Tell me more, like why you are running it instead of your brothers.”

Gwen picked up a small rock. She rubbed its smooth surface with her thumb then sighed before she explained. “I always hated the lessons I received from my governess: etiquette, needlepoint, pianoforte, fashion, ugh! I understand the necessity but most of it is dreadfully boring!”

She paused; however, his steady grin was all the encouragement she needed.

“I felt wronged that my brothers learned interesting subjects while I wasn’t allowed. I convinced Tristan to tutor me in his subjects. Years later, with Colin unreachable and unable to manage it himself, Tristan agreed that my running the estate would be a hands-on exam to see how much knowledge I’d acquired.”

Sebastian gave her an astonished look. “And your father?”

“He must never know.” She shook her head. “I feel dreadful keeping it from him but he wouldn’t approve.”

“I never would have expected you to be so duplicitous.”

Although his tone was not one of reproof, Gwen stiffened. “I feel horrible about that. Believe me, I don’t enjoy deceiving my father, yet I adore managing the estate.”

“You are extraordinary.” Sebastian smiled, openly admiring her.

“How so?” Her eyes danced with mirth as she added, “for deceiving my father or for interfering in your business affairs?”

“What if I told you that I found both attributes astonishing?”

“Then I would be forced to admit the credit isn’t mine.” Gwen brushed a stray curl away from her face. “Tristan is largely responsible. I wouldn’t dare defy my father on my own. That requires a strength I don’t possess.”

Her arranged marriage to Keir came to mind
and she added, “But perhaps obeying one’s father requires more courage than disobeying him?”

“Perhaps,” Sebastian surveyed her, as if trying to uncover her hidden meaning. Then, as if deciding not to pry, he stated, “I will take your advice into consideration.”

“You aren’t annoyed with me for interfering?” Her eyes widened.

“To the contrary, I respect your opinion and am glad you spoke up.” He placed his hands in his trouser pockets, his expression one of a guilty child. “To be honest, I expected you to address the fact that my sister was playing matchmaker between us.”

Gwen’s smile widened. “I chose not to mention that, deciding instead to take the tactful approach.”

“Tactful? Imagine that.” Sebastian feigned surprise.

“Those are fighting words, Your Grace.” Gwen began to march toward their horses.

“Just where do you think you’re going?” he inquired.

“Will you apologize for your previous comment?” Gwen replied over her shoulder as she took the reins of his stallion.

Sebastian’s stride was confident as he followed her step by step. “No, I most certainly will not.”

“Then you leave me no choice but to retaliate.” Gwen turned to face him as she began walking backward. “I must hide your stallion.”

“We agreed not to taunt each other, remember?" He edged closer to her.

“You agreed. I did no such thing.”

Sebastian’s pace quickened. “You realize that if I catch you, I will toss you in the lake.”

“No, not the lake. I surrender!” Gwen turned then held out the reins as a peace offering. When he grasped them, she began to run.

He caught up to her and grabbed her waist before swinging her around to face him.

Gwen pealed with laughter.

“Don’t you want to go for a swim?” His tone was playful.

Gwen shook her head, her smile bright. “No thank you, not today.”

Sebastian’s hands rested on her waist. She reveled in his nearness, the warmth of his body and noted with delight that his hair was the scent of musk. The knowledge meant that she was close enough to him to understand this intimate detail.

It thrilled her.

Then he pulled her closer, his warm breath fanning her cheek, soft and comforting like a summer breeze. A lurch of excitement surged within her as she sensed the change in his good-humored mood. His eyes were now a smoky blue. Their expression told her he wanted to kiss her.

And Gwen wanted to kiss him.

The realization stunned her. Even more so because she’d never wanted anything so much in her entire life. Yet, no matter how much Gwen wanted him to kiss her, she couldn’t allow it.

It took all the willpower she possessed to fight against his enigmatic presence. After tearing her eyes from his, she managed to whisper, “It’s late.”

Sebastian nodded then released her. “I’ll take
you back.” His voice was rough with emotion.

During the ride back to his stables, there was no visible tension from the kiss they had almost shared. Upon reaching his estate, Gwen’s carriage was prepared. Sebastian helped her alight then kissed the back of her hand.

The carriage lurched forward and she peered through the window, watching Sebastian ascend the grand steps before disappearing from view. As she settled against the leather seat, Gwen relished the welcome heat his every touch sent throughout her body. Her mind gloried in the memory of Sebastian’s bronzed skin, perfect smile, the scent of his cologne, and the depth of emotion in his azure eyes.

Even though Gwen’s conscience assured her that she’d followed the proper course of action by not kissing Sebastian, a part of her felt disappointed that he capitulated so readily.

She found Sebastian to be a series of contradictions. His air was jovial and his velvety voice was charming yet all the while, his rugged features, muscular build, and towering frame exuded raw masculinity.

He was a gentleman, a member of nobility, yet he was darker and more intense than any other nobleman she had ever encountered. He was also wittier. She loved his face when he was teasing her, when the cleft in his chin deepened under his lazy smile.

She sighed. Why did this man come along at a time when she was betrothed to another? Gwen was certain that she was the unluckiest lady in all of
England.

“Victoria Angelica Montgomery!” Sebastian bellowed as he charged through the front door.

His sister peered from behind the stairs where she’d been waiting for him. “Yes?”

Sebastian walked toward her then sat on a ruby-carpeted stair. He motioned for her to join him.

“I’m not going over there until you’ve assured me that I have nothing to fear.”

He pointed his finger at her. “You’ll have something fear, all right, if you do not obey me.”

“I know what you’re going to say.” Victoria began creeping towards him. “And I’m sorry I deceived you, but I have no regrets.”

“What gave you such an idea?”