Dangerous Beauty: Part Two: A Mafia Princess (10 page)

“And you met Ky-Ky first?”

Ky-Ky? Who the hell is that,
Carter thought.

“Kyle,” Anastacia answered her silent question. “Me and the kid go way back . . . He just doesn’t know it,” Anastacia said. “Now answer the question,” she said softly.

Carter nodded slowly. “Umm . . . yes. I met Kyle almost two years ago. He’s my best friend.” Even more than Jenna was since Jenna really didn’t know the truth about her, and Kyle did.

“Very well. I’m glad. You two have a cute friendship,” she said with a small smile. “I’m glad you met.”

So was Carter.

Anastacia cleared her throat uncomfortably. “So you two are just friends, right? You never dated?” She tried to sound casual, but failed.

Carter frowned at her sudden uneasiness. “Umm . . . no, we’ve never dated. We could have, but we didn’t. It just never happened that way. We’ve always been just friends.”

Anastacia seemed to relax—which raised Carter’s curiosity.
That was weird
, she thought. But after a moment of uncomfortable silence, Carter shook off her curiosity in the name of moving forward. “Tell me about yourself,” she said.

Anastacia gave her a curious look.

“I want know about you. Who are you? Where do I come from? Why do I only look like you and not Daddy?”

“You have your father’s nose,” she said, smiling. “But the rest of you is Stone. I’m surprised Angelo never mentioned this to you. The Stone family shares similar features. You have my Alexis’s eyes—he was my father—and your hair is black like his. His hair grew fast, too. He wore it long because he found no reason to cut it anymore. My mother was an African woman—hence my dark skin even though my father was a white man. She worked as a servant in my father’s home. My father had an affair with her, and she became pregnant with me. Her name was Carterina Mensah. She was exquisite and sweet, and Alexis’s wife hated her,” she said bitterly, and then she softened her tone again. “You want to know something I’ve never told a soul, not even your father?”

Carter nodded, eager to hear more about her mother’s life.

“I know Angelo told you that my mother died during childbirth, but I wasn’t honest with him. At the time it still hurt to think about it. Would you like to hear the story?”

Carter nodded.

Anastacia began the story. “My father gave us a home because he loved Carterina and me, but my mother was poisoned when I was four. It happened while she was working in Alexis’s home. His wife killed her. When my father found out, he kept me close to him and left his family behind. I gave you my mother’s name to honor her. My father told me she was beautiful, both inside and out—the exact opposite of him. He was a killer, distrustful, and showed kindness to very few men. He walked around with a scowl on his face and a chip on his shoulder, daring anyone to mess with him. I am like my father . . .” she confessed. “My mother softened him. She had a soft heart, sad and expressive eyes, and a strong will. I wanted you to be like her, Carterina, so I gave you her name.” Anastacia smiled at Carter. “You are very complex, my child. This surprised your father and me very much. You have my mother’s warmth, soft heart, and expressive eyes . . .but as soon as your father pissed you off . . .”—Anastacia snapped her fingers—“Just like that, you were like my father. You stalked around the house with scowl on your little face, daring Robert to mess with you. You are very much like your grandfather in that way. He had this . . . air of royalty about him. His family, the Stone’s, we are all this way—including yourself.”

Carter couldn’t help but smile at that.

“The Stone family was a well-known, wealthy, blue-blood family in France. My father was the oldest son and entrusted to be the family’s keeper when his father died. He did so, all while keeping his father’s dark secrets.

“So do I have any family?” Carter asked.

Anastacia sighed and shook her head sadly. “I’m afraid we are the outcasts, baby girl. I have never even heard of my mother’s family, and my father’s family is toxic. They only care about money that doesn’t belong to them. It’s just you and me against the world, sweetheart. This is what I meant when I told that you are all I have . . .”

Carter stared at her mother, trying to figure out what her next move should be. Her mother stared back at her as if she could read every thought passing through Carter’s mind. Carter didn’t like that. Her father used to stare at her in the same way, and he always seemed to know what she was thinking. Carter didn’t want Anastacia to know what she was thinking, what she was feeling—but it was too difficult to hide anything today. Too much was happening.

Carter took a deep breath and sighed. “Say I’m curious . . . That I’d like to, maybe, get to know you and try this whole mother-daughter thing . . .”

Anastacia arched an eyebrow.
“Maybe?”

“Yes, maybe.” Carter slouched in her seat and crossed her arms over her chest. She looked away from her mother. “I still don’t trust you,” Carter said in bitter truthfulness. “I don’t know if you’ll disappear tomorrow . . .”

Anastacia’s jaw tightened in irritation. “Carter . . .”

“You left me before. How do I know you won’t leave me again, Anastacia?”

“I told you—I didn’t leave by choice,” she said through clenched teeth.

“I still don’t know why you left me,” Carter reminded her.

“That explanation will come, but not today. You are still recovering. I will not overwhelm you with too much.”

“How do I know you’re telling the truth?” Carter yelled.

“You’re my child! That’s how you know!” Anastacia snapped, anger and irritation now showing in her features.

Carter immediately became silent.

“You’re not stupid, Carter. You know when someone’s lying to you. You’re a genius, for Christ’s sake! Picking up on a lie is easy. You are only at your weakest when you’re vulnerable, and you are not vulnerable right now.”

Carter frowned. One, she didn’t think she was a genius. She had been isolated with no life and no friends—home school was all she’d had. That was the only reason why she’d achieved all she had academically before the age of sixteen. It was because she had nothing else to do. Two, Anastacia had no way of knowing if Carter was vulnerable or not.

“I could be vulnerable,” Carter mumbled under her breath.

“You aren’t,” Anastacia said sharply. “What you are doing is irritating me . . .”

Carter looked at her mother in outrage.
Irritating her?
“What could I have possibly done to irritate you?” Carter asked in a clipped tone.

Anastacia proceeded to list everything Carter was doing wrong. Carter hadn’t experienced this treatment since her father was alive. “You’re slouching, pouting, avoiding eye contact, fidgeting, mumbling, and answering questions with a nod or a shake of your head and not with words. You’re crossing your arms like a spoiled brat and repeatedly refusing to just get to the point.”

“What point?”

“Trying to decide where we go from here!” Anastacia sat up in her seat and placed her glass of wine on the table. “We could sit here all day, arguing and debating why I had to do what I did, but I don’t have the patience for it. I will not take back what I said. We will move at your pace, as long as we’re moving. I make that one allowance. But I still have rules, Carterina. I know you’re still getting to know me, but like I said, I know you very well—better than you know yourself. So I cannot tolerate you treating me like a stranger instead of the woman that gave you life. I am your mother, and from this moment forward, I feel you should address me as such—Mother, Mommy,
Maman
. I am not Anastacia to you, and for that you should be very grateful. I am not some weak pathetic woman who would abandon her child after bringing her into the world. Everything that I have done since the day that you were born has been to protect you.” Anastacia sighed and softened her voice. “Carterina, I wasn’t there the night your father was . . .”—she shifted uncomfortably—“ . . . but I’m here now, and I’m not going anywhere. I’m staying whether you want me to or not, so I suggest you embrace it, and let’s just try. Please . . . For your father’s sake.” She sat and waited for Carter’s response.

Carter’s jaw clenched. She really wanted yell and kick and scream and fight like hell with Anastacia, but she refused to prove her right about her being a brat. Pulling herself together quickly, she sat up straight in her seat and looked directly at her mother.

Anastacia laughed softly. “Still stubborn, I see. You want to throw a temper tantrum, don’t you? But you won’t let yourself. You don’t want to prove me right.

Carter fought hard against her temper.
Don’t lose it, don’t lose it . . .

Carter took a deep breath and pasted a fake smile on her face. “You’re right,
Mama
. We should give this a try for Father’s sake.”

Anastacia stared at her blankly before speaking again. “
Just
for your father’s sake?” she asked softly.

Carter saw a million different emotions flash through Anastacia’s eyes. Her brows furrowed. “Isn’t that what you said?” Carter asked, confused by Anastacia’s question.

Anastacia groaned and buried her face in her palms. “I can’t do this,” she muttered. Then she looked at Carter with a pained expression. “I can’t do this to you. I’m supposed to do right by you, and it isn’t right to force you to do this just because I’m a selfish, impatient bitch. Your father was better at this,” she muttered.

That was when something that felt like fear rushed through Carter’s body. But it couldn’t be fear. “Can’t do what to me?” she asked cautiously. She was afraid to hear the answer.

“I can’t force this.” Anastacia stood up from the table. “I’ll never really have what I want with you unless I let you decide.” She sighed. “I’ll do as you wish. I’ll go . . .”

What replaced the fear she’d just been feeling made Carter wish she was still only afraid. Grief—grief more intense than anything she’d ever felt in her life overtook her entire being. Carter felt her heart rate pick up and tears stinging her eyes “You’re leaving?” Carter asked, hating that she even cared. Her weakness made her want to slap herself to snap out of it.

When their eyes met, Anastacia’s looked confused as she gazed at Carter’s pain-masked face. ”Carterina, I thought—”

“Is it because of me?” Carter cut her off. “Are you leaving because this wasn’t like you thought it would be? I wasn’t who you’d thought I’d be?” Pain, sadness, and heartbreak laced each of Carter’s words. She willed herself to stop feeling hurt—her mother was giving her exactly what she had asked for—but she couldn’t. She didn’t want Anastacia to leave, and she felt stupid, and weak, and naive because of it.

“Carter—”

“It’s because I yelled at you, right?” Tears made their way to the surface of her eyes and overflowed down her face.
Shit!
“I put up too much of a fight, and now you don’t think I’m worth it?”

“Carter, that’s not true.”

“Isn’t it true? You want leave until I
ask
you to be a mother to me? After I’ve lived nearly twenty-three years without you in my life,
I should
be the one to call you when I need a mother,” Carter spat.

“Carterina, I just wanted to give you time.”

“Twenty-two years isn’t enough time?” she yelled. “I don’t have the right to be pissed that you show up out of nowhere claiming to have been looking for me—after I lived on my own for
five years
!”

Remorse filled Anastacia’s eyes. “I’m sorry—”

“And then you give up after I show a little reluctance because I don’t even know who you are! It’s just ‘Oh, Carterina doesn’t like me, so I’ll go.’”

“Carterina, listen to me for a moment!”

Carter waved her off. “Fine. If you want to leave, then go! But don’t expect to me to call you.” Carter stood up quickly from the table, ready to leave so Anastacia wouldn’t see any more of her tears. Yes, she may have told her mother to leave, but she hadn’t really meant it! She had hoped that Anastacia would fight for her and prove over time that she wanted to be a part of her life—but no. At the first sign of reluctance from the daughter she abandoned, she was right out the damn door.

Anastacia caught Carter’s arm before she retreated. When she turned Carter around, she saw that her daughter’s face was drenched in tears.

“What do you want?” Carter cried unable to hide her devastation. Dammit! She was crying like a damn toddler getting left at daycare for the first time. Maybe she should have handled things better. She shouldn’t have yelled or told her that she didn’t need her, when the truth was—Carter did need and want her mother . . . desperately.

Anastacia immediately pulled Carter to her and wrapped her arms around her protectively. She poured every bit of motherly love she had into their embrace, and it overwhelmed Carter. It was something she’d never experienced before. She had never known the love of the woman who had brought her into the world until this moment in her arms. Soon Carter was weeping, curling close to her as Anastacia held Carter close, cooing soft sentiments into her hair.

She kissed Carter’s forehead. “Shhh . . . I’m so sorry, baby girl. Please don’t cry. I don’t want to leave you. I just don’t want to force you to let me into your life. I want to be a part of it—desperately—but I can’t force this if I want it to be real. I loved your father, but honestly, I don’t want you to let me in for his sake. I want it to be because you want to know me. Because you want a mother and daughter relationship . . .”

“I do,” Carter confessed. ”I want you in my life. I need a mother, but I’m scared,” she whispered.

Anastacia cupped her face. ”Why would you fear me?”

“I spent years convincing myself that you didn’t want me. I told myself I would never meet you. That you didn’t want to see me. The person you are in my head is someone I can’t trust. I’m afraid to get to know you because I know that you could hurt me worse than I’ve ever been hurt before, and I just can’t take any more hurt.”

Anastacia wiped the tears from her eyes. “Carterina Anastacia Stone, I have loved you since the first time I heard your heartbeat. Let me prove that I’m not that god-awful woman in your head. I want to stay. I want to be in your life, but only if you want me to be. If you don’t want me, I’ll just continue to watch you from afar. I promise you won’t even know I’m there.”