Dangerous in Training (Aegis Group, #2) (3 page)

“No.” The word ripped out of him, nearly breaking bones in the force to escape his ribs and his better judgment, a chest-bursting, undeniable admission.

No, he couldn’t leave her.

No, he couldn’t give her up.

No, he wasn’t good enough for her.

But none of it mattered.

She turned, her forehead wrinkled, and her eyes narrowed. Distrust, anger, hurt, and more sadness. Because of him. Because she couldn’t trust him to be there when he’d led her on, because for the better part of a year they’d danced around this spark, this pull between them.

Mason took a step toward her, and then another. He needed to touch her, hold her, tell her he’d figure it out. That there was a solution out there. Anything to make her smile. He wrapped an arm around her waist and she moved, lifting up on the balls of her feet. In that moment he knew he was about to take a critical hit, the likes of which would ruin him forever—and he didn’t even try to dodge it.

Hannah’s lips were soft and the hands she wrapped around the back of his head were unyielding. She kissed his mouth, suckling his lower lip, teasing him. Mason wasn’t strong enough to resist her. He’d held onto his resolve for months, and in a second it crumbled.

Mason hauled her closer, pressing their bodies together, and drinking her in. Nights of fantasies couldn’t measure up to the sweetness of tasting her. She was better than a cold beer or his favorite homemade funnel cake. Finally. She groaned, and her hands slipped to his shoulders, her nails digging in. Her tongue was in his mouth, his hands in her hair. He pulled her closer, tangling his tongue with hers. Everywhere she touched tingled. His nerves burned.

Kissing shouldn’t be this potent. But he’d never locked lips with Hannah before, so it only made sense it was different and new with her.

His head spun, and his knees threatened to buckle under him. It was too much.

She worked her hands up under his shirt, pushing it northward. Fuck, he wanted to let her strip him, ease the ache in his cock with her hands. He wanted her worse than he wanted to live, more than he feared for his job. But this wasn’t the way. It wasn’t right. She deserved better than right here, right now. And the reality was that was all he could give her.

Mason gently pushed her hands away and stepped back, putting much needed space between them. She swayed on her feet, lips glossy, eyes dilated. He’d seen lust before, but never a lust that threatened to gut him like this. Back then, he knew she wanted him, even when he didn’t have a job, a hope, or a prayer to his name. She’d wanted him, for some crazy stupid reason.

“Mason?” The way she said his name, all breathy, was a verbal stroke to his balls.

He should leave. Stevens wasn’t the top dog at Aegis. He couldn’t fire Mason, but he could make life hell. But life without Hannah was already hell, so what did he have to lose?

“You’re leaving again, aren’t you?” The edge in her voice cut him. He’d betrayed her trust, and he had to pay for that. Just like he’d paid for his other sins.

“No, I’m not.” He didn’t know what they were doing, there was no road map, no plan, no course of action, just a feeling that being with her was right.

She pursed her lips and gave him
The Look
.

“Then what? What’s happening here?” she demanded.

“I don’t know.” He spread his hands, wanting to reach for her, but she was too far away.

“You can’t kiss me and push me away.” She wrapped her arms around herself, wearing anger like a robe.

“Yes, your dad has something against me.” Mason knew what the something was, though Mr. Stevens shouldn’t have known. No one was supposed to, but he’d found out Mason’s secrets.

“So what? That’s it?”

“No, it’s...Hannah, when we met I had nothing. Zain was the only family I could ask for help, and I know he pulled strings even though I asked him not to. I never came here thinking Aegis would hire me, that we’d be where we are.”

“And my dad changes things.” She didn’t need to ask the question they both already knew the answer to.

“No. I mean, he did. I had no options, nothing, and when Admiral Crawford offered me a job—he was a drowning man’s savior. I made a lot of decisions out of fear because...because doing what was right hasn’t always worked out for me. I made the wrong call letting your dad bully me like he did.”

“He is a bully.”

“And he’s your dad.” Knowing what Stevens knew about Mason, he couldn’t argue that the old man was right. Mason should stay away from Hannah. It would be better for her. And yet, here they were.

“So what? He wins.” She turned her back on him.

“No, he doesn’t.” Mason reached out and tugged on her arm.

She didn’t come easily, but she didn’t jerk away from him either. He wrapped his arms around her again, his body recognizing how she fit him.

Was this what he’d wanted? What he’d been waiting for?

Ever since the mess overseas, he’d been lost, drifting through life. Was she his anchor?

Being with Hannah would come with a high cost. He didn’t know if he could pay it, but right now all he wanted to do was focus on her.

Mason lowered his head, pressing his mouth to hers in a sweet, chaste kiss. Her posture relaxed, and she leaned into him. He’d betrayed her trust with his actions, it would take more than that to build anything between them. And that was if there was a chance.

He cupped her cheek and stared at her face, the soft crescents of her eyelashes against her cheeks.

“What does it mean, Mason?” Her voice was rife with frustration, and rightly so. That she’d remained stubborn in her affections for him was a wonder. He didn’t deserve her.

“I just need a little time.”

Time to make a plan for how to deal with her father and how he would make it right with her. Because he would make it right, her father be damned.

“Well, make it quick. I leave for Mexico in a few days.”

“You’re seriously going?” It wasn’t as dangerous as it used to be these days, but everything that could go wrong flashed through his mind. All the rescue missions, the poor victims...

“Yeah.” She rolled her eyes. “It’s a resort. I’ll be fine. I just want to know if I should
mingle
or not.”

Hannah’s phone blared from the dresser. She sidestepped him and dug it out from under a pile of clothes.

“Who is going with you?” he asked. Hadn’t she mentioned two tickets?

“Don’t know yet.” She tapped at the screen. “Roommate should be here in an hour.”

Time enough to get into real trouble.

But Mexico?

Sandy beaches. Cocktails by the ocean. With Hannah. It was too much temptation. But her, vulnerable and alone in a foreign country, had less appeal.

“I’ll go with you,” he blurted.

Hannah slowly looked up from her phone, brows lifted.

“Seriously?” she said slowly.

“Sure, why not?” It was a bad, bad, decision. But if he were there, nothing could happen to her. He’d make sure of it. On the other hand, her dad would be on a campaign to staple Mason’s dick to his wall by the time they got back. It was too soon, but if she was determined to go, she couldn’t go alone.

“Mason, you’ve ignored me for over half a year. You practically run away from me when we’re within ten feet of each other. And now you want to go to Mexico with me?”

“Yes.” Okay, when she put it like that, he was an ass, and he had no idea why she’d come to him for help. But she had and they were here. She’d kissed him. Of course, he’d reached for her first, but it didn’t change the order of things.

“Fine. Okay. I’ll email you the flight info. It’s like, Thursday at ten or something.”

“I can’t do that.”

“Then no Mexico for you.”

“Wait. Just—wait. I have a day gig that day. What if we use my flyer miles instead and take a later flight?” In theory it would work, right?

“Okay. Fine.”

Mason’s phone buzzed.

“Shit. It’s work, probably Zain.” And Zain had the ability to track Mason’s phone and see that he was still at Hannah’s house. Hours after he could have left.

“I guess you aren’t staying for dinner?”

Not if he was going to make a plan to swing Mexico, keeping his job and the girl.

“Not tonight, no.” He tipped her chin up with a finger and buzzed her lips with a kiss. Anything longer and they’d be back to tearing each other’s clothes off. Not that he didn’t want to see Hannah in that black thong, but the order of operations needed to be followed. And first was laying a good defense.

Hannah flopped on the sofa, cradling her plate of pizza to her chest. The butterflies had finally settled enough she could eat.

“Okay, spill.” Her roommate, Melissa, settled on the other end of the couch.

Deciding where to put the furniture had taken way too much time, and Hannah was starving. They’d known each other for years, thanks to a forum for pastors’ kids Hannah had frequented in high school.

“You’ve been moony and breathy and weird since I got home. You got your stuff, I see. How’d that go down?” Melissa bit off a bite of pizza, watching Hannah closely.

“Bad—good—weird. I asked Mason for help.” She nibbled on a slice while Melissa sputtered into a napkin.

“What? Mason?
The
Mason?”

“Yes.”

“What the hell? Spill!”

“I just—I knew Dylan was not going to cave, so I figured I needed someone big, bad, and scary. I was at the gym, I’d finished with my client and...Mason was there. So I asked. I mean, I didn’t have another plan.”

“And he helped, and then what? Is this how you get when you see him, because you’re all glowy and anxious.”

“I kissed him.”

“What?”

“And he kissed me back.”

“Seriously? And why did you stop?”

“You texted, and then he got a work call and the moment was gone.”

“Shut up! You should have ignored my text and kept kissing him. What was it like? Was he a good kisser?”

“Oh my God, yes.”

“Tongue?”

“Shut up.” Hannah covered her face with her hand. Heat crawled up her neck, threatening to strangle her.

“Did he get hard?”

“Oh my God, I don’t know!”

“Does he know about the V-card?”

Hannah’s gut twisted up and a wave of nausea swept her.

“No, he doesn’t.” She dropped her hand to her lap. There went all her tingly excitement.

“Do you plan to break that one to him, or just pretend it’s not a thing?” Melissa crossed her legs, fully facing Hannah now.

“I...don’t know. He sort of decided he’s going to Mexico with me, probably because he thinks I need to be protected but...”

“Oh please, you wanted him to go. You joked the other day about inviting him. Don’t act like this isn’t what you wanted.” Melissa wagged a finger at Hannah, a bit of tomato sauce clinging to it.

“I know—I’m just nervous. What if...” She shrugged, unable to finish the thought.

“Let’s look at the facts, my friend. You’ve been sad and pathetic about this guy since...ages.” Melissa held up one freshly licked clean finger. “You’re going to a hot beach with him.” Two fingers. “There will be alcohol, and we both know you can’t hold your liquor.” Three fingers. “At some point you’re going to want to have sex with him, and chances are high you’ll do the deed because you want to.” Four fingers. “The only real question is, will it be good? Is he the kind of guy who will take care of you, before he gets the O?” Five fingers.

Hannah nodded right along with Melissa. They’d discussed just about everything, so there was no point in getting embarrassed around her.

“But—do I tell him?” Hannah chewed her lip.

“Some guys get weird about a girl and virginity. Some guys don’t.”

Mason, despite all his jokes and the caveman behavior, had always treated her with respect. She couldn’t see him not being considerate about something like
that
. But how did she even begin to have that conversation?

“I told Randy before we had sex. Shocked him silly.” Melissa was halfway through her plate of pizza, while Hannah had barely touched hers.

“Really?”

“Yeah, I only really told him because I was scared he’d try to stick it in the butt and I wasn’t going there, not my first time.”

“Did he?”

“That time? No.”

“Wait—he did though?”

“In the butt?”

“Yes.”

“Hell yeah. It’s not bad, it’s just different.”

“My eyes have been opened.” Hannah put her plate on the coffee table and curled her legs up under her. She considered her options and what she knew about Mason for a moment. “If I tell him...I think he’ll want to wait.”

“Do you want to wait?”

“Being an adult virgin is...it’s a hassle. I’m over it. It’s like this burden I never wanted. And what if he doesn’t believe me?”

“Then kick him to the curb. There are plenty of nice penises in the world. You might like him, but if he can’t handle a truth like that, then he can’t handle the rest of you. It’s a rare, special person that can put up with a pastor’s daughter.” Melissa saluted Hannah with her cup.

They both drank to that.

Would Mason freak out, or would he believe her? There was real chemistry there. A zing of...rightness...she’d never felt before. If it was right, could anything they did be wrong?

“I can’t believe you did it in the butt.”

“If Mason doesn’t have a huge dick, you should try it.” Melissa grinned.

“Doesn’t it hurt?”

“Lube is your friend.”

“Do I need lube for...”

“For penis in vagina sex?”

“Yes.” This conversation was going to kill Hannah from embarrassment, but who else could she ask? And clearly there were still topics that could make her blush. Who knew?

“Not if he gets you good and horny first. Like, if he does oral or fingers you a bit, it should make you nice and wet. If not, lube. It’ll make things easier.”

“Do you just...say, hold on, let me get some lube?”

“If you need to. If he has a problem with it, he can find another vagina to stick his dick in. I think I have an unopened bottle of lube up stairs you can have.”

“I can’t believe we’re having this conversation. I could never have had this talk with my mom.” Hannah’s dad was completely out of the question.