Dangerous Love (3 page)

He hadn’t walked and he wasn’t going anywhere but back to the ward. What he had actually done was to spin his wheelchair around and wheel himself towards the door, battering at the sensor switch until it opened, then it had shut softly behind him and the steady squeak of his wheels had been silenced.

She’d wanted to run after him, grab the handles of the chair and turn it round, but what would be the point? He’d said as soon as he was recovered he’d be back on duty on the lifeboats and she’d told him to choose. She’d given him her ultimatum, fired up by grief and fear. Just be a vet, she’d said, be content to save the lives of dogs and cats – give up the RNLI, the rescues, the danger. Give it up or go.

“If you knew anything about me, Regan,” he’d said. “You’d never demand I make a choice like that.”

“And if you really loved me there would be no choice to make.”

“I could say the same thing,” he’d said sadly.

And he had made his choice. When she swallowed her pride and went to see him at the hospital a few days later, he’d gone and no one seemed to know where. But he was wrong about her not seeing him again. She saw him every day in the face of their little girl.

The voice crashed into her thoughts again.

“This is just a waste of time – it’s just a bit of bruising! I’ve had a bruised spine and believe me, this is not it! This is minor. Just let me go home, love, eh?”

Regan turned round and took a step towards Resus where Josie was standing at the open door looking out at her, her face a mask of anguish as if she couldn’t stand any more shocks.

It couldn’t be, Regan thought even though her ears and Josie’s expression was telling her otherwise. No way. He’d gone. He’d promised not to come back.

“First of all, I’m the doctor here and I will decide whether or not your injuries are minor,” Karen said patiently. “And I am not your love!”

Regan would have laughed if the patient had been anyone else being put in his place. But Bram! Here? Impossible!

CHAPTER THREE

“Hey, how’s Georgie?” Josie said, trying to head her off. Josie would remember Bram of course, remember that once upon a time he and Regan had actually meant something to each other.

Regan took another step towards Resus.

“Regan, don’t go in there…”

“Look, I’ll leave you to yourself for a minute,” Karen said, exasperation making her voice tight. “Just think about being cooperative and making things easier for everyone concerned. I’ll be back.”

“When you do, bring those discharge papers for me to sign – I don’t intend to spend the rest of the night here.”

Karen emerged from Resus, cheeks bright pink.

“Would you believe that guy?” she said, throwing her hands up in the air. “Talk about stubborn!”

“But very good looking,” Josie grinned and Regan shot her a warning look. Karen was a relative newcomer as were most of the Accident and Emergency staff at the new hospital. Regan’s former relationship with Bram wasn’t exactly common knowledge and she wanted it to stay that way.

Bram’s time in Walsea had been almost as brief as their relationship. He’d come to the town a newly qualified young vet on a year’s contract to work with Dennis who owned the only veterinary practice in town. He’d left three months before the end of his contract taking Regan’s heart with him. He had no roots here, no reason to come back – so what the hell was he doing back?

“That too,” Karen admitted and Regan realised the flush in her cheeks had nothing to do with her being cross, but everything to do with her being attracted. Well nothing had changed in that department then. Bram was still attracting women like wasps round a jam pot. He made a big impact on the town last time he was here and there was no reason to suppose this time would be any different.

“I’ll talk to him,” Regan said, setting her shoulders straight and taking in a deep breath.

“You will?” Karen said, surprised. “What about Georgie?”

“Mike’s operating,” Regan explained. “I won’t be needed for a while.”

“Well good luck,” Karen said. “Let me know when you’ve tamed him.”

Tamed him? Oh, no one would ever do that. Regan walked in and let the door close behind her. She looked around. The boards on the wall were smothered in notices and memos, the desk was the same. It was never like that on television. Things were always so much neater and more orderly on television, at least where paperwork was concerned.

There were two beds with curtains between them. Bram was in the one at the far end. Regan’s heart gave a thud and she almost gasped. All she could see of him around the half pulled curtain was a pair of tanned, muscular shins and two large feet.

She took another step closer, and another. More of him came into view, but he was half covered with a sheet, lying flat on his back, arms at his sides… she edged closer… his face was turned away from her staring at a raft of equipment to his side. The sight of that fair tousled hair on the pillow made her knees buckle. She must have made some sound because he turned his head slowly and his eyes widened in surprise.

He sat up. “Regan… Regan? Is that you? My God, it is you!”

And his face broke into the most wondrous smile of recognition as if he were really, truly pleased to see her. His eyes had practically ignited and his smile didn’t waver. Had whatever happened to him out there on the cliff wiped out his memory? Taken him back to a time when they were happy together?

“It’s so good to see you.”

“Is it?” she asked coolly.

She picked up her pace and hurried to his bedside, picking up his notes simply to give herself something to do, not looking at him. Oh God, no, she couldn’t look at him, couldn’t let herself fall into those summer ocean blue eyes and let herself drown all over again. It had hurt too much last time. Still did.

“You rescued the little girl?” she said as everything suddenly fell into place and she realised why he was here. “It was you that saved Georgie. You’re back with the RNLI?”

She looked at him, then looked away again. It was Bram who rescued Georgie. She could scarcely breathe and for one awful dizzying moment, Regan thought that she was going to faint.

“I’ve always been a volunteer, Regan,” he said and she knew he was staring at her, could feel his eyes burning into her. “I was before I met you and I’ve never stopped. You know that. Nothing’s changed.”

“I should th… thank you for what you did,” she said, still staring at the notes, her heart pumping like a piston engine. Thank him yes, but for God’s sake don’t tell him why! Tread carefully here, Regan, don’t let what’s happened make you blurt something out you will later regret.

“Maybe her mother should be doing that,” he said, anger giving his voice a raw edge. “Poor little scrap, left to wander the cliffs on her own. Don’t these people realise kids are a gift to be treasured?”

Oh, get him started on kids! It was his pet subject. Children and animals, helpless and vulnerable and unable a lot of the time to take care of themselves. If he hadn’t been a vet, he’d have been a paediatrician and a damn good one too.

“Hey, Regan,” he called softly and she was reminded of just how persuasive he could be. “You can swing it for me to go home, can’t you? You know how I hate hospitals and there’s no one at home with the dogs and I’ve got surgery starting at eight tomorrow.”

“Surgery?” her eyes snapped up, met his head on and crashed spectacularly. Still so blue, still so beautiful. “You mean you’re in practice round here again?”

She hoped he’d say he was just doing locum work for Dennis, just here for a couple of weeks. He stared at her for a moment, a faint flush rising in his cheeks.

He’d changed – and it wasn’t just the faint scar running down the side of his face, so dangerously close to his eye. Considering the mess he’d been in last time she saw him, he looked pretty good now. Better than good.

“I bought Dennis out when he retired,” he said, having the grace to look at least a little uncomfortable that he’d made such a big move without informing her. “I know I’m the last person you want in town, Regan, but it’s a big enough place and there’s no reason our paths should ever cross. I liked my time here and I’ve always kept in touch with Dennis, so when he told me he was retiring, well I jumped at the chance to come back to be honest.”

She had no idea Dennis had retired or that his practice was in new hands. She didn’t even know he’d kept in touch with Bram, presumably at Bram’s request. Her face burned. How many times had she been to the surgery with Bonnie her dog and taken Georgie along? How many times must Dennis have looked at the child and seen Bram? Had he said anything?

“Hell, Regan,” Bram’s voice cracked. “It’s not so terrible me being back here is it? You don’t still hate me that much do you?”

“Hate you? I never… How long have you been back?”

“A month,” he muttered, then he lifted one side of his mouth in a crooked grin. “You really don’t hate me?”

“You know I don’t. But you’ve only been here a month and here we are crossing paths already. Did you really think you could just come back and pick up your life again and not expect to bump into me? Or did you come back for just that purpose?”

“I didn’t come back here to see you, Regan,” he said quietly. “But I must admit I’m not sorry that I have.”

“Then why?” Her heart was hammering.

“I like it here,” he shrugged. “It’s the first place in my whole life that ever felt like home.”

She threw his notes down, anger bubbling up inside her. How dare he come back now? How dare he break his promise that she would never have to see him again? Didn’t he have any idea how much it hurt?

“Regan,” he said, the gentleness of his voice slicing chunks out of her. “It’s been six years. I thought maybe you’d moved on by now. I certainly hope you have.”

Six years. Then why did it suddenly feel like six minutes? Six minutes since he went away and her life came crumbling down. Six minutes since he turned his stubborn back and left her. But she’d moved on all right. He had no idea just how much she’d moved on.

“Discharge yourself, Bram,” she said, all brisk efficiency and not a hint of the turmoil inside. “I’ll get Karen to bring you the form to sign yourself out of here. Your scan was clear, but you know what to look out for. Come back if you have any reason to worry.”

“Thanks,” he winked at her and scrambled her insides.

“Yes, well – thank me once you’re in the clear. If you collapse and die ten minutes after you get home, don’t come complaining to me.”

“I won’t,” he grinned.

She smiled. Despite everything, she smiled. Couldn’t help herself. She left on shaky legs and stopped outside to get her breath back. He hadn’t seemed at all fazed to see her. In fact, she might just have been any other face from his past. Was that all she was to him? A reminder of the past? Probably, she decided, he obviously didn’t think they had been that important or he wouldn’t have come back. And she could excuse him that because after all, he didn’t have the daily reminder of their child to keep the memories fresh.

“Well?” Karen asked when she emerged from Resus. “Did you work your usual magic?”

“He needs a discharge form,” Regan said stiffly. “And probably a taxi.” But then she saw Len waiting, legs sprawled out, head back, eyes closed. “Maybe not the taxi. It seems his ride home is covered.”

“Does he realise..?” Karen began.

“He knows the score,” Regan said. She checked her watch. Still a while to go before she had to be back with Georgie.

“You sound as if you know him,” Karen said, unsettling Regan with the intensity of her gaze.

“I know a lost cause when I see one,” Regan replied airily and made her way over to the lifeboat man. “Hey, Len,” she said, shaking the big man’s shoulder. “Len. Wake up.”

“What? Hey! Regan!” He grinned up at her, then the grin faded and he chewed on his lower lip. “Regan… Oh heck.”

“You didn’t tell me he was back, Len,” she said accusingly.

“I didn’t?”

“You were in here less than a week ago when I stitched your hand. How long did that take? How long were we talking?” She looked towards the ceiling. “Let me see, you told me about your nephew’s new quad bike and how good the fishing’s been this year and how you’d had to get the brakes fixed on your Toyota, but at no point did you think to mention that my ex was back in town.”

“I meant to,” he said, swallowing hard. “I just… I was waiting for the right time and it never seemed to come up and besides, it all happened years ago, and… You know people have short memories. I thought maybe if nothing was said that you and he might…”

“You’re not making any sense at all, Len,” she said. “Are you sure you didn’t bash your head too?”

She didn’t see much of Len, but he knew about Georgie and although she’d never confirmed it to anyone, everyone that knew her and Bram must have figured it out pretty quickly. It was only a matter of time till Bram found out the truth.

“I seem to remember telling you the lifeboat was out of bounds for a fortnight, Len. At least until the stitches were out – which they aren’t,” she added. “What is it with you guys? You risk your necks saving other people, but won’t take care of yourselves?”

“Are you talking about me now – or are you still talking about Bram?” Len asked sheepishly.

“He’ll be ready to go home in a minute,” she said wearily, damping down her anger. No use taking it out on Len. Poor guy. Wasn’t his fault. “Keep an eye on him though, Len.”

“Yeah, sure.” He ran his hand through his spiky grey hair. “Regan, it has to be done, love. If it weren’t for people like us – like Bram, willing to take a little risk, then people would die. That little girl might have died. I didn’t want him going over that cliff tonight, but there was no other way. We could have waited for the fire brigade, but they were out in force attending a massive chemical leak. And a big wave could have had her in the oggin if Bram hadn’t got to her when he did.”

Oh the irony of that! Her child – their child - might have died if not for Bram doing the very job she’d begged him to give up.

“At least he wasn’t out on the water with the rest of us,” Len added as if that would make the slightest difference.

Regan shook her head. She knew she had been unreasonable six years ago, but she’d acted purely out of fear. Fear of losing him and she’d lost him anyway. If she had that time back would she do things differently? Probably. But could she have lived with that gnawing fear that she might lose him in the most tragic of circumstances, especially once they had a child?