Dark Surrender (8 page)

Min scowled at the store’s ledger, lying innocently on the counter by her purse. She was so on edge her hands were balled up in fists and she had the sudden desire to throw the ledger across the room too. She needed some kind of release.

Her inner voice didn’t even say anything. It sounded more like a contented sigh, maybe a whimsical hum. Whatever it was, Min knew exactly what it was suggesting. There was a sexually insatiable vampire somewhere out there, and she’d already set gris-gris at every possible entrance to the house. That added to the intricate and mightily effective wards and protection spells she decked the house out in, would allow her even more control over the vampire than she’d had the last time.

But it’s so stupid…so dangerous…you’re flirting with death…

She felt her shoulders tighten as her inner voice argued with her more sensible side.

But you own that fiend. You’ve already proven you can make him your sex toy. And what good is a toy unless you play with it?

But you shouldn’t have a sex toy that could kill you. Why would you want something like that?

Min felt her shoulders relax as she whispered, “But I do.”

That was when she decided it was time to let the vampire in again. She needed the break, and the sex, and…how pathetic was she…she actually missed the murderous fiend. And though she hadn’t looked outside, not even once, all these nights since she’d had him, she knew he’d been out there, waiting for her. She could feel him.

She’d tried to block it out, but now she simply opened herself up the slightest bit, and there he was, waiting for her.

She shouldn’t do this. It was so stupid. But she moved to the window, looked out, and there he was, exactly where he’d been waiting for her that first night.

*****

Chapter 9

Again there was the feeling that he Luca had passed through an electrified spider web. There had even been a small shock when he’d touched the doorknob as well. He knew immediately that her spell was stronger than it had been before. That by entering he would be giving up all control to her.

He entered anyway.

She was waiting for him, her face blank at first, then a little scared, but finally a smile bit through her mask. She had beautiful dimples surrounding that scarlet, pouty mouth. “Come in, vampire.”

Luca cringed at the word, at her referring to him only as vampire. “You know my name. And since I will have no free will at all while I’m here, at least have the mercy to call me by it.”

She seemed to ponder that, and she scowled at what she was thinking. Finally she said. “Fine. As you wish.” She stood there, just staring.

Finally he tested his restraints. He could walk, at least that much he could do without her telling him explicitly what to do. He reached out to touch her face when he got to her.

She looked up into his eyes. Her eyes were so dark, so drowning deep. But there was a flicker of gold in them, a flare of her power. “Same rules as last time, Vam—Luca.”

“
I cannot harm or kill you,” he said breathlessly, moving all the closer. “but only try to please you.”

She smiled. “Yes…do try.”

Min climbed the stairs leading to her room. She felt cold, tingly, even though the house was more than warm enough. Even though she wore only a thin, silken negligee, she shouldn’t be shivering. About halfway up the stairs it hit her. She was nervous…but nervous about what? If anything her control over him would be even better than it was the other night. She’d taken her time with the ritual magicks, fashioned the gris-gris with care that hung from ever possible entrée to her home—even the old coal shoot that was quite too small for anyone, including a vampire, to fit through. And she’d been working to bolster the home’s natural and warded defenses. By inviting him into her home, and dropping the whammy on him this way, she’d assured his powerlessness against her.

So why was she so goddamn nervous?

“
You can go ahead into the bedroom,” she said to the vampire as she passed by her door. “I’ll be there in a moment.”

She stepped into the bathroom in the hall and closed the door behind her, putting her weight against it. Her heart thumped hard in her chest. It was crazy, yes, the entire thing, what she had done, what she was going to do with this vampire, it was all thoroughly insane. To open her body to a soulless, demonic murderer was against so many natural laws, against her own up-until-then stubborn moral code. But there she was, after a full week of concerted effort and planning, she was about to take the vampire into her bed,
again
.

She felt a little light headed as she paced around the confines of the room. It was large as bathrooms went, but when your mind is racing, as are your feet, you need room, and the bathroom just wasn’t cutting it.

She still could change her mind, tell him to leave, revoke the invitation. Surly it really was just that simple. But that wouldn’t make her any safer. No, if she was going to do a one eighty on having him with her, then she shouldn’t just let him go. She should kill him.
The sooner the better,
her rational self advised. As he was, she could easily just order him to stand still, not to move a muscle, as she staked him. Yes, that would be the most efficient way to deal with him. And then she could go right back to her life, to hunting for a cure for her mother, and forget all about the lunacy of having an affair with a vampire.

Her hands were shaking when she turned on the cold water, letting it flow over her wrists, trying to quell the hellish heat that flashed under her skin, the heat that alternated with the stinging cold of her fear. And that was what she was, wasn’t she? She was afraid—afraid that the vampire would turn the tables on her and make her his slave, or kill her. Afraid his evil would infect her soul. Afraid of what her mother and sister would think if they ever found out.

Yes, the cold in her stomach and the sudden heat in her face told her that she was ashamed of what she was doing. But damn it, it was her life, this existence, and she would live it on her own terms.

Even if she couldn’t forgive herself for doing so later.

The hinges of the bathroom door squealed slightly as the vampire came into the bath, his green eyes flashing with hunger, his skin so luminously white, lips parted and full, begging to be kissed.

What’s wrong?” he asked as he moved closer.

She wanted to tell him to go away, to order him to leave, but she couldn’t. She wanted him close to her. That’s why she hadn’t made it an order when she’d told him to go into her room. That was why she wouldn’t tell him what to and what not to do. Deep down she wanted him to take her, to do what his carnal instincts told him to.

And as long as he couldn’t hurt of kill her, her plan would work out.

The best laid plans
. Min sighed.

She was trying frantically to pull herself together when he touched her, just the barest of caresses, his fingers tracing over her shoulders, and then down her arms. She felt the heat of her want overtake the cold shudders of her fear and shame. Just that one touch had brought her to a full blaze of yearning need, need for the vampire…for Luca.

Damned if she couldn’t keep it straight in her mind. He was a freaking vampire, no matter how much she wanted him, he was not human! Thinking of him by his name, familiarizing him by using it, was just stupid—maybe lethally so.

No, not like this. She couldn’t let him take her when she needed him this much. Rational or not, it felt like this time, as she was, she would have no protection against him. Even though she had far more protections this time, she knew, deep down, that she wouldn’t use them. She would let him have her. Anything and everything, short of killing her.

Last time she’d been in complete control, and though it had been exactly what she’d needed, and it had been
nearly
the best sex she’d ever had in her life, it had been so controlled it had been close to masturbation.

Her mind flickered on a memory, the memory of
him—
the man who held the number one spot in that department, and still held a place in her heart—Günter.

The memory practically sizzled with how wild and uncontrolled it had been, under a crescent moon, against the trunk of a great white oak tree, in the middle of the forest. He’d smelled of earth and pine, the musk of wolf. And he’d brought her to ecstasy so many times that night, using his power, his preternaturally strong body—smooth and muscular, every inch of him hard as iron.

But he’d torn her heart, her very life, apart when he’d left. For The Hunt was more important. It was his life, his true love. And it had taken years for just the thought of him not to reopen those old wounds. The thought of him and what she’d gone through after he’d left still tore at her. But it was a pain she could bear.

She had told herself she never wanted to feel that way again. She’d vowed she would never let another man into her heart again. That was why she’d…the mere act of remembering what she’d done to herself, and with magic, crystallized the blood in her veins, freezing her to the bone.

The spell she’d cast that night, when she could take the pain of his leaving no longer. It seemed like such a simple thing: warding her heart from new love. Like the wards on the house, it was a simple thing to do. But she had never tried such a thing, and it was so very dangerous. She’d kept her plans hidden from her mother and sister, and yet her mother knew the moment she’d seen her again. That she’d constructed a wall of magic around her heart. And that it would never let a new love in again.

That spell had lasted a good many years. She’d been able to ignore every single man who showed the least bit of interest, only now and then taking a man into her bed, and only for the sex. But now, it seemed, her wall of love stopping magic might be crumbling. The vampire’s hands held her arms firmly now, and though he was no warmer than room temperature, she felt heat building under her flesh where he held her.

Oh god, how she hungered for him.

His arms slowly slid around her and pulled her body into his. He was hard, pressing himself through the fabric of his pants against her backside. Min gulped as his mouth touched the back of her neck, causing all sorts of sensations to cascade down her spine and over her skin.

Min looked up to the mirror over the sink to find she stood alone in its reflection. She gasped as her cold fear made a return, clogging her throat, making her gasp. No, no…not like this. If she couldn’t see him in the mirror, she couldn’t ignore or delude herself that he wasn’t the monster he really was. She tried to pull away from him, but his arms squeezed tighter and held her in place against him.

“
Please,” she breathed, trying to turn around. “In the bedroom.”

“
Why?” his breath was cool against the back of her neck. “So you can pretend I’m something I’m not? That I’m just some human man.” He ran his hands down her body to the hem of her negligee. He leaned his weight in against her as he pulled that thin silk shroud up around her hips, exposing her bare bottom to the cool air of the bathroom. Min gasped as his chilly hands glided over the tender flesh he’d just bared.

“
I’m a monster, Min.”

By the goddess, having him say her name made her feel like a compass. It gave her entire body a jolt, and made her heart…oh yes, it was indeed her magic shrouded heart. It made her heart beat harder, and faster, and only for him. Having him saying her name made him her true north, it was just as simple, as impossible, and inexorable as that.

“
And you will bear witness to that fact,” He reached out with one hand and tapped a finger against the glass and silver of the mirror—his finger touching that mirror, but cast no reflection in it. “Even as I fuck the living hell out of you.”

He grasped one of her breasts with one hand, pulling her into him, as the other hand slid down her rib cage, then over her belly, making her gasp. Slowly his body slid down over hers, until he was kneeling, the side of his face rubbing against the bare, sensitive flesh of her bottom. His strong arms were wrapped around her waist, but then they receded, his hands finding purchase on her hips as his cold lips kissed and nuzzled those vulnerable orbs. Those cool, strong hands slid up onto her back and pressed down on her with urgent strength.

“
Bend over the sink, and hold on.” Luca’s voice was rough with want.

Min hesitated, part of her not liking him telling her what to do, and despising the hands that were pressing against her, willing her to obey. But another part, one that felt feral and rampant with unquenchable heat, the part that wanted him to do to her what he willed, obliged his request, leaving her bent over in supplication, and trembling.

“
Spread your legs for me,
my
Min.” His lips grazed the backs of her thighs as they spoke, and her body jerked in response. But she did as he commanded, and the moment she did she felt his hands grasp her bottom, pulling her apart as his lips slid up from below and kissed the feminine lips of her sex. Gently at first, but then his cold, wet tongue slid into her, lapping slowly, steadily. He parted her core with that talented tongue, all the while penetrating deeper and deeper into her, making her moan and writhe against the cold porcelain of the sink.