Darkest Before Dawn (22 page)

“He said you should have brought me here. Is that what you were going to do? I don’t like it here.” Her face clouded with shadows. “I unmade them, Muse, and it felt good. That’s not right, is it? Is that what you felt when you burned those people to save me? Am I meant to be empty? I’m scared.” She sobbed, and then a grin slashed across her face. “I want to do it again.”

I clamped my jaw closed. “Dawn, I can help you manage your... gift.” Right, like I managed my own. “We have to leave. The building isn’t safe. The fire still hungers. Let me get you out, Dawn. Let me save you.”

She tilted her head to the side and assessed me. I shivered with the overflowing currents of energy breezing through my veins. Ashes rained from my skin. Around me, the fire whispered promises of destruction. If I didn’t save myself soon, I’d be as lost as this building was.

She puffed out a sigh and slumped forward. Her demon fell back from her skin, leaving the vulnerable little girl behind.

“Come...” I shoved my demon back. She snapped and snarled as she fought me for freedom. Gathering Dawn against me, I guided her back the way I’d come. The flames had died down. Behind us, the walls groaned and the ground trembled.

W
e stumbled
out into a sunlit backstreet, coughing and wheezing smoke from our lungs. EMTs crowded, sirens wailed, people cried. I hugged Dawn close and snapped at the EMTs to get back. We were fine. Others needed their help more than we did. A grumble shook the air around us like thunder. A cloud of ash spluttered skyward as the warehouse complex collapsed in on itself. A savage spike of glee twitched my lips as I turned away. I shouldn’t have enjoyed the destruction, but I did. Had it not been for Dawn, I’d have been dancing in the debris.

Dawn’s voice reached me through the clamoring madness in my head. “I don’t know what I am.”

A street away from the simmering remains of the Institute, I planted her down on a curb, away from the crowds, near a closed grocery store, its graffiti-covered shutters pulled down. Crouching in front of her, I cupped her face in my filthy hands and smiled. “It’s okay because you’re not alone. I won’t ever let you go again. I can help you manage your demon. We’ll work together, two half bloods, just you and me.” I’d lost Stefan. I wasn’t losing her. I tucked her hair behind her ear. And maybe, if I could save her, I’d save myself too.

A delicate smile skipped across her lips.

“Muse. Back away. Do it slowly.”

I swung my stare over my shoulder and fixed it on Ryder. He had a gun palmed in his right hand, finger hooked over the trigger and Dawn in his sights. Determination hardened his sharp eyes.

“Ryder...” I stood slowly, as he’d said, and turned my back on Dawn to face him. “What are you doing?”

“She killed everyone in the cafeteria, Muse. Jesus...” His hand trembled, aim wavering. He flexed his fingers and regained control of himself. “She pulled them apart, turned then into confetti.”

“Ryder...” I licked my dry lips, my throat hoarse. “You can’t do this. She’s just a little girl.” A quiver of power slithered through me. I looked to the right, across the street. Akil stood at the curb, hooded eyes locked on me.

“She ain’t no little girl.” Ryder blinked rapidly. His lips turned down, and he shook his head slowly. “The Institute is gone because of her. Do you know what that means? The only thing stopping the demons from flooding this city is dust. She’s demon, and she’s a killer.”

“It wasn’t her fault.” I lifted my hands, palms out. “Akil...” I glanced back, but he’d gone. “Akil brought her here. He had no right.”

“It doesn’t matter who did what. She slaughtered them. Shit, Muse. I saw it all on the cameras. She’s a monster. Half bloods don’t get happy endings, Muse. You’re too damn fucked up. Every single one. Even Stefan, in the end. Y’know, I thought you might be different, but it ain’t possible. The demon inside you calls the shots. Doesn’t it?”

Dawn stood beside me, her little hand resting on my thigh. She looked up at me with those doe-eyes, wise beyond her years. “I am a monster.”

“No, honey.” My heart stuttered to hear her say it. “You just need a friend, that’s all.”

“I don’t want to be this way.”

I don’t want to be that demon.
Stefan’s words drifted back to me.

A whimper betrayed my internal battle between the need to save her and the need let her go. I knew, deep in my bones, that Ryder was right. I’d witnessed her power, and she truly was a terrible thing. But I’d come so close to saving her, to freeing her. She was a half blood caught in a storm just like me.

“Please...” I stepped in front of Dawn, shielding her behind my legs. “I will take her away from this, from everyone, somewhere she can’t hurt anyone. There must be a way to control her demon.” Even as I said the words, I wasn’t sure I believed them.

Akil flitted into existence in my peripheral vision. “The princes will find her. They were ignorant of the power residing in half bloods. That is no longer the case.”

Ryder breathed hard. His wide eyes flicked between Akil and me, probably alarmed to find Akil backing him up. “Fuck, Muse, get outtah the way. Don’t make me shoot you too.”

“I can’t let you do this, Ryder.” I lowered my hands. He would shoot me. I’d always known it. If it came down to this, staring down the barrel of his gun, he would pull the trigger.

He trembled. A sheen of perspiration glistened on his face. He smiled, but it was a bitter, worn out ghost of a smile filled with regret. He snarled at Akil, “Get Muse out of here.”

I shot my hand out, halting Akil as I drilled my stare into Ryder. “Akil, don’t you dare.”

“She can’t be saved, Muse.” Akil’s smooth voice sounded entirely reasonable.

I smiled and tugged on my demon’s reins. “Then neither can I.” I tasted the flames on my lips, felt them lick across my body.
Let the demon win, and nothing can hurt me again.

Ryder fired. The bullet smacked into my shoulder, engulfing my entire right side in a blast of agony, spinning me. My demon recoiled, leaving me human. I collapsed face down on the road. The smell and taste of my own blood coated my nose and throat. And then, as if the world felt I hadn’t been dealt enough of a challenge for one day, I looked up to see my brother in all his netherworldly glory leering down at me. Vast black wings draped me in shadow. His milky-white body gleamed like marble. “Thank you for delivering her to me, sister-mine.”

“Dawn, run!” I screamed.

Ryder’s gun rang out. A splash of crimson burst across my brother’s chest before his flesh soaked up the wound. His muscles rippled and spat out the deformed slug. It bounced on the road between us, reminding me not to fuck with immortals.

Val stepped around me, apparently deciding I wasn’t worth the time or energy. I tracked his formidable demon form as Ryder continued to empty a clip of bullets into him. They buzzed about Val, no more bothersome than flies.

Mammon barreled into Val – seemingly out of thin air. His obsidian muscles rippled as he tackled Val and shoved my brother through the storefront shutters with all the finesse of a wrecking ball. Inhuman growls, snarls, and roars resounded inside the store. There was no way on this earth Mammon would let Val take Dawn.

I struggled to roll onto my side and hook my legs under me. I couldn’t stand. I could barely sit up. My entire right side throbbed with a mind-numbing pain. Blood soaked my clothes, gluing them to my feverish skin. Through the haze of agony, I fixed Dawn and Ryder in my sights. Ryder loomed over her, the muzzle of his gun inches from her forehead. His aim didn’t waver. His hand had never been steadier. Dawn tilted her head up and looked into his eyes. She didn’t run, didn’t beg, didn’t call her demon. She could have done all of those things. She could have killed us all without even drawing from the veil. She was chaos, but in that moment, chaos was controlled by a nine-year-old human girl. She blinked up at Ryder and said two words.

“Thank you.”

He pulled the trigger.

“No!” I reached a hand out as the gunshot cracked through the air and echoed down the street. My demon tried to clamber into my skin, but physical and mental anguish drove her down.

Dawn fell back. Her tiny body crumpled in a heap at Ryder’s feet. She lay still. The touch of her element had vanished. A strangled cry—somewhere between a scream and a growl—tore from my throat. I smothered the blazing pain under my rage and somehow managed to get to my feet, only for my legs to crumple, dropping me to my knees.

Ryder staggered under the weight of his own guilt and turned away from Dawn’s body and from me. He gave a wrenching groan of agony. I didn’t care. I wanted to gather Dawn’s fragile body into my arms, but I couldn’t get to her. I fell forward onto a hand, lifted my gaze through my hair, and whispered, “It’s okay, Dawn. Everything is going to be okay. You’re free now.”

The tears came, sliding down my soot-covered cheeks. It wasn’t right. It wasn’t fair. She could have survived. She could have lived. She didn’t deserve this.

After perhaps minutes, hours, I don’t know, I was aware of Akil’s warming presence close behind me.

“Valenti has fled,” he said softly. “The Enforcers are coming.”

I bristled. My demon prowled just below the surface. “Get away from me.”

I expected an argument, but in the next breath he was gone. He had brought Dawn here to this hellhole. It was his fault. All of it. He could have stopped Ryder, and he hadn’t. He’d wanted her dead too. Everyone wanted her dead. Nobody cared enough to try to help her. What was wrong with this world?

Eventually, the sounds of the city coaxed me back to reality. Ambulance sirens
bipped
through the crowds a street away. Clouds of gray smoke bellowed skyward, but the inferno devouring the Institute was dying. I felt its death in my veins.

I watched, detached and numb, as a black-clad firefighter walked toward me, helmet tucked under his arm. His short chestnut hair was plastered against his head. His face sported smudges of ash and soot. I might not have recognized him if not for the calm blue eyes: the same firefighter who’d helped me in Adam’s office.

He crouched beside me, looked me over with a sensitive appraisal, and noted the blood soaking my top. He gave me the most heartbreaking smile. “There’s no use in you dying here.”

I wasn’t sure I had the strength of mind to reply. Behind him, the EMTs wheeled a gurney closer, and behind them a handful of Enforcers bore down on us. Tears blurred my vision.

He tugged his gloves off and held out a hand. “C’mon, let’s get that wound looked at.”

I shook my head and bit my lip, trying to stop its quivering. “I can’t leave. I promised her.”

He glanced over my shoulder to where Dawn lay and nodded. “You’re banged up pretty bad. Maybe it’s time you looked after yourself?” His sincerity spoke of understanding. I examined his features, searching for hostility, but he wasn’t Institute, and he wasn’t demon either. He was just a normal guy who wanted to help, no strings attached, no ulterior motives. I closed my eyes, fearing what it meant to let Dawn go. I’d pinned more of my hopes on that little girl than I’d let myself believe.

As the firefighter closed his hand around mine and tugged me to my feet, a veil of forced indifference settled over me. I managed a few steps before falling against the ambulance crew. The blissful embrace of unconsciousness stole me away.

T
he Stone’s Throw
bar had never seen a crowd quite like it. I jostled through the throngs of people, taking note of the armed Enforcers among them. My arm throbbed; a week and it still burned like a bitch. The painkillers were wearing off. I’d been popping so many pills I virtually rattled as I walked.

Ben Stone acknowledged me and gestured to one of his new bartenders to fix me a whiskey. I probably shouldn’t have been drinking while my veins were buzzing with drugs, but really, in the scheme of things, I had other things to worry about. Like being a single thread away from disaster.

While I waited at the bar, I couldn’t help dragging my gaze across the symbols spray painted across the walls and ceiling. The Enforcers were here en masse, and judging by the incident wall set up along one side of the room, they were here to stay. A map of Boston sat center stage. I couldn’t see much, tucked away in the corner as I was, but I noted the locations of a dozen or more fat red circles pimpling the map.

The bartender handed me my drink. I paid, brought it to my lips, and noticed a hushed quiet descending over the crowd. The crawling itch of dozens of pairs of eyes skittered down my back. I took a sip and welcomed the sweet heat of the alcohol as it burned my throat and eased the tiredness in my muscles. I took my time, and all the while, the silence settled over the crowd until only the mumblings from the TV disturbed the quiet.

Licking my lips, I placed my drink down and leaned my good arm on the bar. When I lifted my gaze, upward of seventy Enforcers glared back at me.
Way to make a girl feel uncomfortable.
At least I’d ditched the pink and black persona in favor of my more typical knee high boots, skinny dark washed jeans, and my 90’s throwback leather jacket. They’d see the gun holstered at my hip. Not that it would do me any good against a mob of demon killers.

I don’t know what they expected me to do. Sprout horns and a wing, and roar at them?

Adam Harper’s deep voice broke the stalemate. “Muse, join us...”

His Enforcers collectively grumbled their displeasure, but none would argue with the boss. They slowly resumed their conversations, turning away from me in the hope I’d skulk off with my tail between my legs. If only it was that simple.

I carried my drink to where Adam’s voice had originated from to find him standing with half a dozen others around two tables pushed together, strewn with maps of Boston. Ryder hung back, leaning against the far wall, thumb tucked over his camo-print pants. His untucked shirt bunched around his gun. He chewed on a toothpick while training all of his attention on the documents. We hadn’t spoken since he’d executed Dawn a week ago, and that was perfectly fine with me.

“Are you up to speed, Muse?” Adam asked.

All eyes turned to me. I might have squirmed under their collective no-nonsense stares if any of this actually mattered to me. As it was, not even whiskey could warm my cold heart. I’d shut all the emotional shit away.

“No.” I said, surprised at my steady tone. I slid my gaze to Adam. I hadn’t seen him since the firefighters hauled his ass out of his burning office. He was lucky to be standing there. My fingers twitched with that knowledge. I’d promised Ryder once that I’d never hurt Adam or the Institute. Well, I’d kept that promise. For what it was worth.

I rolled my sore shoulder beneath my jacket. “I’ve been in and out of the clinic.” They didn’t need to know I meant Jerry’s place and not the general hospital.

Ryder lifted his hooded gaze. He plucked the toothpick free, picked up a file, and tossed it across the table to me. Fat black letters printed across the cover spelled out the contents: Operation Typhon.

I reached out, instinctively seeking answers, and then paused, curling my fingers into my hand. “What’s going on?”

Adam straightened. “We’re down, but we’re not out. Demons have renewed their incursions with vigor, scouting parties before an all-out invasion. They’re breaching the veil in record numbers. Boston PD is swamped with reports. Witnesses are reporting vigilante groups setting themselves up as would-be Enforcers, believing we’re not up to the task of protecting this city. We have emergency plans in place, including new premises and several inbound teams, but it’s taking time, and the vigilantes are out for blood. They’re getting themselves killed.” Adam dislodged his glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose. “The calm of a few weeks ago was a lull. What we’re experiencing now is the outer fringes of an incoming storm. I’ve received reports of half a dozen Class A demons in Boston, Muse.”

I was a Class A. So was Akil. We used to be the only ones. It looked as though that was changing. “Shit just got real, huh?” I found it hard to sympathize with the assholes who brought this all on themselves.

Adam pushed his glasses back on and gave me the disapproving fatherly stare. “Some, we suspect, may be princes.” He puffed out a sigh. “We need you.”

One of my eyebrows hiked up of its own accord. “Is that so?” Bet they could have done with Stefan too. What a shame Adam ordered the death of his son and their best Enforcer.

“We need your connections.” He tapped a black and white photo of Akil. “We need your expertise.” He flicked open the cover of the Operation Typhon folder to reveal an image captured on the Institute’s internal video network. A one winged demon stood in a hallway, arms out, wing flexed high above her head, summoning the fire like a magnet calls metal. “And we need your power.”

Well, damn. My gaze hooked up on Ryder. He wasn’t happy about this, and considering his rigid glower, I could assume it wasn’t his idea.

“What makes you think I’m going to work for you after everything that’s happened?” I met and held Adam’s eyes.

“We’re not the bad guys here, Muse. The demons are. If they go unchallenged, if it’s true, and there are princes on this side of the veil, people will die. Good, normal, everyday people. This is just the beginning, and you know it. Do it for the people of Boston, for your neighbors, your friends. You’re a good person. You know what this means, and you can do something to stop it.” His Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed.

I flicked my gaze across the stern faces of the others crowded around the table. I had no friends here. Most of these people would happily put a bullet in my head, Ryder included. But this wasn’t about the Institute, not any more. The demons were coming. “I’ll help you. But I’m not dishing out your justice, Adam. I’m not needlessly killing demons for you. I will provide you with intel about the princes, because if you’re right and they’re here, then you’re gonna need more than me. You’ll need something not far off divine intervention.” Perhaps Dawn could have turned the tide. She’d had the power to kill an immortal. But she was gone.

Jenna eased into the group beside me. A warm smile briefly lightened her lips. I failed at hiding the sharp intake of breath. She nodded, understanding my hesitance. “Playing both sides, Muse. Just like you.”

“That’s a dangerous game, Jenna.” My brother was not to be messed with. Once he tired of her, he’d destroy her in ways I didn’t even want to think about.

“I know.” She regarded her colleagues with pride bright in her eyes. “We’re the frontline. If we fail, they’ll be nothing left of Boston.”

“Can we count you among us?” Adam asked.

“No.” Their collective gasp brought a smile to my face. “But I’m not against you. I promise you that much.”

The Enforcers talked strategy, but none would look me in the eyes. I listened, soaking up their camaraderie. I was no longer part of their world, but I never really had been. Always on the outside, that was me. Nowhere to call home. Half demon, half human, wholly fucked. I finished my drink, grateful for the warmth spreading through my otherwise cold soul, scooped up the Operation Typhon file, and moved to leave when Adam’s heavy hand clamped around my good arm. He drew me to one side, away from his devoted employees.

“What you did, I won’t forget it.”

I flicked my gaze down to his hand, which he promptly removed as though I’d scolded him. “Just because I saved your ass, it doesn’t make us best buddies. I’m not your hero, Adam. I’m your enemy. Don’t ever doubt that.” I turned away from him before I really told him what had crossed my mind back in his office. He was a smart guy. He’d have figured as much.

Outside, I stole a few moments to deliberately breathe the slightly briny air of Boston into my lungs and soak the ambience of the quiet street into my pores, letting the city sounds and smells subdue my rattling anxiety. I didn’t imagine the creeping sense of unease. If Adam was right, then whatever was happening beyond the veil had reached a tipping point, and those demons who could get out were scrabbling for freedom. Unfortunately for them, the Boston streets weren’t demon friendly. They never really had been, but now gangs and death squads awaited newly arrived demons. People would die. Both sides were losing what was fast becoming a bloody turf battle. The body count was rising. Before long, the press would catch on. The fuse was burning down to a whole load of explosive material and the Institute was woefully underprepared, outmanned, outgunned and vulnerable. I admired their tenacity even if it would get them all killed. Never let it be said the Enforcers were cowards. They knew they were fighting a losing battle, but they were going to take the demons down with them.

I closed my arms around the Operation Typhon file and hugged it to my chest. Inside, there would be information about the other half bloods.
They’re like animals
, Jenna had said. The Institute was going to need them, but could they be controlled? From what I’d learned about my half-blood comrades, the answer was no. We didn’t have a great track record for control. At least if I stepped out of line, Ryder would shoot me down.

A tight sizzle of heat trickled down the back of my neck, alerting my human senses to the wholly demonic presence behind me. I could have ignored him and walked away, but walking away from the Prince of Greed wasn’t an easy step to take.

“Am I going to find your name all over this file?” My voice carried through the crisp night air. Distantly, a siren wailed, but even the very real noises of the city couldn’t detract from the netherworldly throb of power he radiated, especially when I felt the tease of his fingers through my hair.

I gasped and snapped my head around, expecting Akil to be standing right behind me. He emerged from the shadows of a blocked-up doorway, as though those curtains of darkness had created him. In the subdued light where color fled, red embers sizzled in his eyes. The fall of his expensive suit accentuated a body I’d recently become intimately reacquainted with. He didn’t approach as I’d expected him to, but stood back, reading me, likely waiting for the accusations that burned on the tip of my tongue.

His gaze flicked to the file in my hand, a cursory glance, guarded with indifference. “The contents of the file is irrelevant, as is the past. The Boston Institute is rubble and ash. Their meddling delivered them their well-earned justice.”

He was entirely too nonchalant. I’d bought the blasé bullshit from him for ten years. Not anymore. The infinitesimal widening of his eyes, the slight flare of his nostrils, the slippery smile that hardly touched his lips: they all added up to a hint of something like smug satisfaction.

I glanced at the closed doors to Stone’s Throw. A murmuring undertone of voices drifted through the still night air. At any moment, my little chat with a Prince of Hell could be disturbed. My fraternizing with Class A demons wouldn’t go down well. “There are upward of seventy Enforcers behind those doors. Any one of them would give their right arm to capture you, and you’re standing not ten feet from their back door. Are you trying to get caught?”

His heated gaze stayed trained on me with laser-like intensity. “Do you really believe seventy or seven hundred Enforcers could capture and hold a demon of my caliber?”

And there were seven—scratch that—six smug-ass princes just like him eyeing up our world. Hell help us. I licked my lips and watched as the movement caught his molten gaze. He’d scored me with that gaze as we’d lain together, wrapped in the trappings of lovemaking. Was that what he was thinking? Undressing me with his eyes? I couldn’t pretend the sex hadn’t meant anything, but neither could he. The change between us simmered like an electrical current in my veins. I had the distinct impression I’d somehow dragged him down to my level, and he’d elevated me to his. And there we were, standing on mutual ground, eyeing each other with sharp intent and dark knowledge. I’d seen him lost to grief, heard him beg to be loved, and while he may not have said those exact words, I knew what I’d felt in his fevered kisses and urgent touch. In all likelihood, he didn’t understand what was happening between us. An immortal chaos demon could not love. He was incapable of wrapping his egocentric mind around it. Love was impossible for him, and yet... Those things he felt, they were alien to him, and I bet that drove him wild. I let a satisfied smile sit easily on my lips. His fire-touched eyes narrowed, but his smile stayed, curious, uncertain. He looked at me as though I were a puzzle, and the very fact he couldn’t figure me out drove him to distraction. Good. He could know exactly how it felt to have the one you love shut you down. He’d done it to me. I was foolish then, naive and weak. That half blood girl was long gone. Whatever I was becoming, I was on a par with him. Equal.

When I spoke, my tone implied an equally blasé and nonchalant attitude. I’d learned from the best. “Things are different.”

“Indeed.” His statuesque masculinity served to remind me of the demon I was facing off against. Akil’s human vessel was a trap, but which one of us had been caught?

“You could have stopped all of this from happening, but you didn’t lift a finger. It’s your fault Dawn’s dead. As sure as Ryder pulled the trigger, you killed her.” My calmness didn’t sound right to my ears, but the glassy undercurrent mirrored in my thoughts was exactly what I needed. It felt good not to care for his reply as though he couldn’t hurt me, no matter what he said or did. I was beyond that.

“Dawn’s demise was necessary.” Still, he didn’t move, and he watched me as though he might actually care about my reply.