My trance broken, I popped open my eyes to see my grandmother standing in front of me, her hands grasping me by the shoulders. Getting jerked from my connection to Aydin had given me a pounding headache and I stomped backward to break my grandmother’s hold.
“What?” I barked.
“It’s Xenia,” she said, her eyes holding a mixture of anger and panic. “She’s gone.”
I looked at Aydin’s ghost and watched him shake his large, gargoyle head.
“She was standing right by the window,” I said. “How could she suddenly vanish in a room filled with people?”
“It wasn’t that sudden,” my grandmother said. “You’ve been in a trance for nearly an hour.”
I blinked. It hadn’t felt that long. I glanced around the room and found everyone gone but a sleeping Natalie and my grandmother. “Have you looked everywhere?” I asked.
“Of course.” She sounded annoyed. “And so have the Arelim.”
I thought about the pen charm, but I’d taken it away from Xenia. It was back in the bag where I had stored the charms reserved for the squires.
I ran to the room Xenia and I shared and lifted the mattress from the box spring on my bed. The bag I’d hidden there was gone. Damn it!
“She has the pen charm back,” I told my grandmother through gritted teeth. “And you and I are the only ones who can see her if she uses it.”
“I’ve been watching for a visible Xenia, not an invisible one.” Her mouth turned down at the corners when she added, “Now that the wards are set to allow ghosts through, she could leave without anyone knowing.”
And that, apparently, was my fault. “You know as well as I do that Aydin had to be allowed in so he could help Natalie.”
Her shoulders lifted and fell with a deep sigh. She rubbed her temples. “Of course I know. I’m not blaming you, I’m just worried about Xenia. She could be the murderer’s next victim.”
I should have felt more concern than I did, but at that moment I was too pissed off. The little thief had lied and stolen from me. She’d reneged on a promise to her sister knights and to the Arelim. I wasn’t sure I’d ever forgive her.
“She can’t have gone very far,” I said. “It’s after midnight and freezing outside. How could she leave without a car?” My heart gave a shudder as I remembered one of the items in the charm bag she’d taken. I slapped a hand against my forehead. “Crap!”
My grandmother frowned. “Zeke and I were just about to head out in Natalie’s Jeep to look for her.”
“I doubt that will do any good,” I said. “Xenia has the flying charm. I’m sure that’s how she got away.”
Aurora nodded as if flying was a perfectly acceptable mode of transportation. I doubt anything surprised her anymore. “I think I know where she went.”
“Home?”
“Yep, back to the city. I bet she’s in Denver by now.”
At least it was a city nearby and not in another state. And if she were in Denver, we had eyes and ears there who could scope out any magical dealings if she tried to sell the charms. Knowing what I knew of Xenia, I believed that’s what she was up to.
My stomach made a little jump as I thought about returning to Denver. I felt a mix of good and bad vibes about that city and some of my memories terrified me. Didn’t matter, I had to go back eventually and now was better than later.
“I’ll find Xenia,” I told my grandmother. And when I did I’d spank her to within an inch of her bratty emo life. “I need to go to Denver anyway. I have to search the Vyantara fatherhouse ruins.” Namely to find whatever charms and curses had survived the fire.
My grandmother shook her head so fast I was afraid she’d knock something loose. “Chalice, you can’t leave.”
“Why not?”
“You know why not.” She began wringing her hands again and started to pace, her steps hard and fast. “It’s too dangerous. The murderer is still out there.”
“I know that, which is why I’m going. Someone has to stop her.”
“That someone doesn’t have to be you.” She stopped moving to give me such a tender, pleading look I was at a loss for words. She took my hand and clasped it between both of hers. “It’s taken so long to finally have you with us,” she said, her eyes brimming. “I lost your mother to violence. I can’t lose you, too.”
My eyes stung and I found it suddenly hard to swallow. “You know the risks to living as we do. I’m sure your mother worried about you the same way.”
“I wouldn’t know,” she said, her voice soft as a whisper. “I never knew her. I was adopted into another Hatchet knight family after she was killed.”
I didn’t know my grandmother had been an orphan. “How old were you?”
She thought for a second. “Four, I think. Maybe five. But I don’t remember anything about my mother. I don’t think she stuck around much when she was alive.”
I had no desire to have children and my grandmother just provided a good reason for that decision. So what if the order needed more knights? The Arelim could collect them from among the whisperers. That’s how the order had begun in the first place.
I pulled my hand from my grandmother’s firm grip. “I realize how hard this is for you, but it’s the only way. We can’t send the squires to Denver, we can’t ask for Rusty’s help while her powers are gone, and Natalie is too weak.”
“I can go,” she said. “I’ll find Xenia myself and take down that bitch who’s murdering our knights.”
I had no doubt she could pull it off, but her job at Halo Home was more important. “Rusty and Natalie need you. So do the squires. And I have connections in the city that you don’t. It’s best that I go.” I let my lips soften into an almost-smile. “You know I’m right.”
A tear slipped free and she hastily swiped at it with the back of her hand. She nodded.
“Quin can take me back with him to Elmo’s,” I said. “I’ll be safe there. And Aydin will come, too.”
I searched the room for Aydin and saw his ghost filling the doorway. My grandmother saw him too because she offered him a grateful smile. “What were you able to learn from Natalie’s memories?” she asked him, though the question was really meant for me since Aydin couldn’t talk. So I told her everything he’d told me. Her face drained of color.
“You know something else, don’t you?” I asked her. “Something Natalie didn’t say.”
“It’s only a suspicion,” she said, the worry lines on her forehead going even deeper. “Natalie never gave a name?”
I looked at Aydin, who shook his head. “No. Aydin thinks it was kept from her on purpose.” But I remembered a name. A name I heard Natalie whisper just after she’d almost suffocated to death. “Does the name Maria ring any bells?” I asked.
My grandmother took a step back and her knees wobbled. Aydin rushed up behind her as if to catch her in case she fell, but she’d just fall through him. He was about as solid as a cloud of fog.
I guided her to my bed and she sat down, her fingers clutching at the neck of her sweater. Her breathing picked up speed and the dark circles beneath her eyes stood out against her pale skin. “I do know of someone named Maria.” Her voice came out ragged, as if she’d run out of breath. “Maria was Saint Geraldine’s daughter.”
Now I remembered where I had heard the name before hearing it from Natalie. Aydin once told me he had helped deliver Geraldine’s baby on the battlefield. That the child’s fallen angel father had tried to force Geraldine into giving her baby to him. When Geraldine was drawn and quartered by the church, it was assumed the village midwife had kept Maria to raise as her own.
“You don’t know that it’s the same Maria,” I said.
“When I was young I heard a rumor that Maria was still alive and living with her father behind the black veil, but I never believed it.” My grandmother hugged herself. “Perhaps I should have.”
If Maria’s father had tried to take her, he probably succeeded after Geraldine’s execution. After getting hacked to pieces there’d have been nothing Geraldine could have done to stop him.
“I need to contact Saint Geraldine,” I said. “It’s possible she can help us find her daughter.”
“I’ve heard of knights going bad before, but nothing like this. Living on the blood of the Fallen?” My grandmother visibly shuddered.
Creepy. And probably dangerous as hell.
If I was to stay in Denver a while, I wasn’t about to leave Shojin’s heart behind. Hidden or not, I needed it for Aydin when he was ready to become human again. As soon as the Hatchet murderer was caught, I would have my man back.
I left my mother’s shield with my grandmother for safekeeping, and I asked her to take care of Ruby for me while I was gone. If anything were to happen to me I wanted to make sure they didn’t fall into the wrong hands. I tossed all my belongings into the canvas bag I’d arrived with and tucked the black fallen angel feather into the side pocket of my coat. What a relief Xenia hadn’t stolen it, too. I wasn’t sure how valuable it was, but it could have hidden properties I had yet to discover. I shrugged on my coat, headed downstairs, and once out in the yard I found the same shovel I’d used to bury the heart. I began digging around the giant roots of the ponderosa tree.
“Need some help?”
I glanced up to see Rafe standing there, his human guise expertly back in place. He’d changed his look from Mr. GQ to stylish mountain man complete with plaid flannel shirt, denim jeans and heavy Sorel boots. He’d completely bought into the whole manly man thing.
“Thanks, Rafe, but I’m almost done.” I dug the spade in for another scoop of dirt. It was easier than I thought it would be, even after a fresh snowfall.
“Does this mean Aydin has made up his mind?” Rafe asked.
Not that it was any of his business. “Yes, but he’s planning to wait until after we’ve caught the murderer. In the meantime, he thinks he’ll be more helpful as a gargoyle than a human.”
Rafe knelt down to watch me dig. “I understand you’ll stay in Denver awhile.”
Of course he would know my plans already. The Arelim’s network was like a grapevine.
“I will be, yes,” I said.
“Is Aydin coming with you?”
“He’ll help me while I’m there, but I don’t know where he’ll stay.” I dug the spade in deeper and heard it clang against the iron skillet. Jackpot. “The Vyantara may still be looking for him so he’s doing his best to stay out of sight.”
“The fatherhouse is gone,” Rafe said. “There are no Vyantara left in the city.”
“Are you sure about that?”
He huffed. “No.”
“We’re not taking any chances.”
“You could use my help, too, don’t you think?”
I looked up at his face and saw the sincere question in his eyes. He really wanted to be a part of this.
“We can use all the help we can get,” I told him. “I’ll let you know when. But for now we’ll be going places where angels fear to tread.” I grabbed the skillet’s handle and yanked it up out of the hole. And gazed down into empty space.
twelve
“IS SOMETHING WRONG?” RAFE ASKED.
I couldn’t believe it. “Shojin’s heart. It’s gone!”
“Are you sure that’s where you buried it?” he asked, sounding like his usual calm and collected self.
“Of course I’m sure.” I grabbed the skillet and flung it out into the snow. “That little thief took it.”
“What thief?”
“Xenia!” I glared at him. “You do know she’s missing, right?”
“Yes, but we stopped looking when we realized she used the pen charm to hide herself. She’s beyond our capacity to see.”
Unfair as it was, I knew that to be true. The Arelim were powerful and possessed some magical abilities, but it was their fallen brothers who topped the charts on spells, charms and curses. The knights took mostly after their Fallen fathers and not the Arelim angels their fathers used to be.
“How can you be sure it was Xenia?” He sounded genuinely curious.
“Because I reburied the heart the night the Hatchet murderer almost killed me and Natalie.” It made perfect sense now. Xenia had watched me from our bedroom window and she’d run to tattle on me to my grandparents. I could have done without the drama. “She must have seen exactly where I buried it. Maybe you saw, too.” I narrowed my eyes at him.
He cocked a hip and met my glare. “Are you accusing
me
now?”
Rafe would prefer Aydin be out of my life completely and keeping Shojin’s heart would just about guarantee it. He couldn’t lie to me. It was against Arelim law.
He gave me a smug grin and wiggled his fingers in the air. “You know very well I can’t touch anything associated with a gargoyle.”
I frowned, realizing he was right. He couldn’t have taken it.
Looking bored, he asked, “What will you do now?”
“Now I find Xenia and take it back.”
* * *
Quin drove Elmo’s Studebaker along the dark city streets of downtown Denver. My heart stuttered when we rounded a corner and headed toward the same street the Vyantara fatherhouse had been on.
He must have seen me stiffen because he asked, “Are you okay?”
I breathed out a shuddering sigh. “Fantastic. This is good for me, really.”
“There’s a lot to be said for facing your fears.”
“I’m not afraid.” At least I didn’t think I was. All the things I feared were either dead or gone. “If I fear anything, it’s my past, which is ridiculous because it’s over.”
Quin nodded. “I know it’s over, but I think you’re afraid of losing what you finally have now.”
How did he get to be so smart? “You’re a wise man, Mr. Dee.” I had no problem facing a dozen gargoyles or a dozen nasty sorcerers, but threaten to take my family away from me and I’m shaking in my boots.
“I’m here for you, Chalice,” he said. “And so is Elmo and Aydin and…” He stopped for a theatrical pause. “So is Geraldine.”
I turned in my seat to stare at him. “You’re in touch with her? Through the veil?”
He grinned. “Almost every day.”
I should have known. I’d sensed something between those two, even if one of them was a mummified head. She wasn’t dead, just altered in a nonliving sort of way. Besides, I’d be the first to admit that physical looks meant next to nothing when you cared deeply about someone. “You’re in love with her,” I said.
The dark of night wasn’t enough to hide his blush. “It’s still too soon to say. We have a few obstacles to overcome.”
If anyone could relate to obstacles in a relationship it was I. “I know what you mean.”
“I believe in my soul that Geraldine will be whole one day,” he said, his tone wistful. “But I often find it hard to be patient.”
I was both happy and sad for them. I knew firsthand how painful it was to love someone you couldn’t have. “Does Geraldine feel the same about you?”
He shrugged. “Possibly. We’re staying good friends for now.”
That was the sensible thing to do, at least for the time being.
“I figured you would want to talk to her as soon as possible,” he said.
He was right about that. Though it was after three in the morning and I’d had no sleep in over twenty-four hours, we couldn’t afford more delays. I needed to change my sleep schedule back to days anyway. Operating under the cover of darkness was safer for everyone, especially innocent bystanders. I preferred being out and about when the rest of the city was asleep.
Quin steered the car to the curb in front of a magnificent church with spires tall enough to pierce the sky. It still looked like a great white dragon crouched in a city of asphalt and concrete, but the sight of it didn’t induce a feeling of awe this time. I had nearly died here, murdered a gargoyle here, and watched my adoptive sorcerer father bleed to death at the foot of the altar. The Cathedral Basilica had become a beautiful horror for me. And seeing as how Quin had parked the car here, I assumed it’s also where I’d be having my chat with Geraldine.
“I realize this church makes you uncomfortable,” he said, looking sheepish. “But it’s the only place Geraldine can come through.”
I heaved in a breath. “Don’t worry, it’s fine.” When I opened the car door to step out, my feet felt weighted and I had trouble standing. I didn’t suspect any supernatural forces at work, just my own mind playing tricks.
Forcing one foot in front of the other, I followed Quin to the back door and waited for him to pick the lock. He used a key instead.
“Wait a minute,” I said. “How the hell did you get a key?”
“I forgot to tell you,” he said, while opening the door. “The church is no longer owned by the Vyantara.”
That was good news, but it didn’t answer my question. “So who owns it?”
“The Arelim.”
I chuckled. “Very funny. Angels can’t own things.”
“Says who?” He preceded me inside and I hesitated at the threshold. “There are no ghosts in here,” he assured me.
Maybe not the woo-woo kind, but my mental ghosts were almost as bad. I followed him to the stairs leading down to the basement, where Geraldine’s tomb used to be. I stopped to gaze toward the front of the church, where mayhem had ruled less than two months ago.
“All traces are gone,” he said, as if reading my mind. “Go see for yourself.”
I sniffed the air and smelled dust, remnants of stale sweat from the occasional transient, and furniture polish on the pews. All blood scents were gone, as was the dead-animal stench that attached to Shui like a second skin. The church smelled clean, but I had to see it to believe it.
I headed down the aisle between rows of pews and approached the altar. I cued up my super vision and scanned every corner. Not a stray piece of shattered gargoyle in sight. Gazing upward, I marveled at the stained glass windows that shimmered in the moonlight. It had to have cost a fortune to replace what Shui had broken. If the Arelim now owned this church, it wouldn’t surprise me if the angels themselves had created the windows.
Feeling cleansed of concern, I turned to head back to the stairs. Shadows in the corners appeared more menacing in the dark than they should have. I chalked it up to a heightened state of paranoia and tried to look away, but my eyes refused. My vision pierced the gloom and I discovered the outline of a figure. At first I thought the murderous Maria had found me, but the body belonged to a man. He was impeccably dressed, his silver hair combed stylishly, and his black eyes stared at me with such intensity I thought they’d burrow a hole straight through my skin.
“Quin!” I shouted. I froze in place, unable to move. Nothing physical held me, but my own shock was paralyzing enough. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. “Quin!”
He ran up to stand beside me and I pointed at the shadowy figure in the corner.
“Chalice, what’s wrong?” He gazed in the direction of my pointing finger. “What do you see?”
My mouth was so dry I almost couldn’t speak. I managed to croak, “Gavin. It’s Gavin!”
Quin touched my arm and I yanked away.
“You told me there were no ghosts here.” My anger and terror twined around each other to make my voice shake. “Gavin’s dead. His ghost is haunting the church!”
Quin shook his head. “I promise you there are no ghosts here. The Arelim made sure of it.”
I jabbed my finger toward the menacing figure of Gavin, who continued to glare. “Then what the hell is that?”
“I don’t know. I can’t see anything.” He started to walk toward the shadowed corner and I screamed at him to stop. He did. “Okay, I’ll have the Arelim sweep the church again. I’m sure it’s just a bad memory rearing its ugly head.”
“It’s not moving, but its eyes are glaring at me.”
“I bet it’s only a soul-stain,” Quin said. “Gavin’s death was so tragic and sudden that his dark soul must have stained the air inside the church. Nothing a little spectral bleach won’t wipe clean.”
I’d heard of soul-stains, but had never actually seen one until now. Ghosts were shells of those who passed on, and soul-stains were imprints of souls that died in rage. They were supposedly harmless, but a soul-stain of Gavin Heinrich could never be harmless. He’d been my master far too long and if anything could force his soul to cling to this plane, it would be his hatred of me.
I shuddered and headed for the stairs, rushing down them so fast I nearly tripped over my feet. Not even Gavin could make me run away from this church and stop me from talking to Geraldine.
An ornate tapestry used to hang over the vault door to Geraldine’s tomb. It was gone now, as was the door. The tomb with black walls and a rickety old table in the center now looked like a room out of
Better Homes and Gardens.
A wood laminate floor covered the twentieth-century tiles and the brick walls had been painted pale sage. Floor-to-ceiling curtains in a garden print hung on one side, and the other walls held ornate light sconces along with several framed photographs of lush flower gardens. A cream-colored chair and love seat were artfully arranged around a green braided rug. All that was missing were flowering shrubs and potted plants.
The room helped lessen my shock at having seen Gavin’s soul-stain. The colors and light were so lifelike I could have sworn it was spring.
“Wow, Quin, did you do all this?” I asked him.
“Mmm-hmm.” He straightened a pillow on the love seat and ran his hand along a bookshelf. He blew on his finger. “Time for the feather duster.”
“It’s lovely.” I lowered myself to the chair and surveyed Geraldine’s shrine. A pity she couldn’t enjoy it for herself. “Very peaceful. A perfect place to meditate.”
“It’s even better than that, Chalice.” He closed his eyes and within seconds the shimmering surface of the silver veil appeared on the curtained wall. It rippled in rings of undulating sparkles before parting to allow a woman through.
Not just any woman. It was Saint Geraldine, in the flesh.
I stood up so fast I almost lost my balance. Geraldine looked elegant in a long white toga-style dress with her golden hair cascading in soft waves over her shoulders. Her crystal blue eyes were pinched nearly closed by a broad smile that stretched from one ear to the other. “Chalice!” she said, arms open wide.
I leaned forward to embrace her, and only then noticed the transparency of her body. I could see through her to the rippled veil and delicate floral curtain behind it. When I reached out to touch her, my fingers contacted nothing but air.
“I honestly wish I was able to hug you,” she said, and lowered her arms. “The gesture was sincere.”
“You’re a ghost?” I asked, not liking that idea at all.
She held out one hand and tilted it like the wings of an airplane. “Sort of, but not really. I’m not dead.”
“Does this mean all your body parts have been reunited?”
Quin shook his head. “No. That’s why she isn’t solid.”
“As long as my head is with the Arelim I can take physical form even if I only appear wispy as a cloud.”
I didn’t mind. I preferred this to the shrunken mummified head I’d had to talk to before. This seemed more…natural. I twirled around slowly. “I love what you’ve done to the place.”
“Isn’t it incredible?” she asked, beaming at Quin, who colored with the compliment. “Quin knows exactly what I like.”
“It’s the least I could do for you,” he said.
The two of them held each other’s gaze for several long seconds and I suddenly felt like a third wheel.
“I wish this was just a reunion visit, Geraldine,” I said. “But I’m here because I need your help.”
“Already back to work?” she asked. “I’m sorry that I wasn’t able to speak with you while you recuperated on this side of the veil. The Arelim have a strict policy regarding the knights who visit. No mingling allowed.”
How could I forget? When Rafe wasn’t training me to control my senses, I’d been bored out of my mind. Yet the peace and tranquility behind the veil is seductive enough to block most yearnings. I must have been a special case because I got antsy to leave on my first day.
“It’s about your daughter,” I said slowly, gauging her reaction by watching her face.
Her brows made a little twitch and her perfect peach-colored skin maintained its healthy glow. She wasn’t real flesh and blood so her complexion couldn’t actually tell me anything. But her eyes grew round and filled with ghostly tears.