Darkness Awakened (Primal Heat Trilogy #1) (Order of the Blade) (13 page)

“Didn’t you hear anything I just said?” Her body tightened in a traitorous response. “I can’t get involved with you. I can’t trust you. And I really can’t have sex with you.”

“Yeah, I heard it all, and I have my own agenda that can’t afford to be screwed up by a
sheva
destiny, but I suspect that’s not going to be enough to stop us.” His eyes darkened. “Sex between us will be a very big deal.”

She swallowed, her skin getting hot. “I don’t want to have sex with you.”

He gave a soft laugh. “Oh, sweetheart, you won’t have a choice. Neither of us will.”

“You said we could resist the bond.”

“Hell, yeah, we’re going to fight like the devil not to crash and burn. But sex? That’s different. Either we separate, or we’re going to have sex eventually.” His eyes were blazing. “And that has nothing to do with the bond. It is all about the fact I crave you with every fiber of my damn being, and it’s getting stronger every single minute.”

“So we separate.” The words tumbled out of Grace’s mouth before she could stop them; the thought of succumbing to Quinn was too much. She didn’t want to lose herself in him, yet a part of her wanted to so desperately she could think of nothing else.

Quinn scowled and stood up. For a minute, she thought he was going to agree, and relief rushed through her. Relief and agony, at the same time. Then he shook his head. “I can’t. If I let you go, he’ll hunt you down.”

“What?” She jumped up. “Who will hunt me down?”

“He? Who?” Hunt her down? She couldn’t help it when she started to tremble.

“Gideon Roarke. He’ll know the minute he sees me.” Quinn cursed again and walked away a short distance, bracing himself on a tree trunk. “He’ll find you wherever you go, and kill you.”

“Why? Why would he kill me? Seriously?” What was
wrong
with these warriors? Could this situation get any worse? This was like a bad movie. “What did I do?”

Quinn turned his head. “I told you earlier. When a Calydon meets his
sheva
, he eventually goes rogue. It’s the Order’s job to stop that from happening, so we intervene before that happens, before destiny can play out. We pre-empt hell.”

“By killing an innocent woman?” Because that sure sounded admirable and heroic.

“No. Not usually.” He gave her a hard look, and she saw the warrior come to life. He was no longer the passionate lover, but the cold, disciplined fighter. “Usually, I kill the Calydon because our duty is to protect innocents.”

“
You
do it?”

“I do it. I’ve killed hundreds of friends. I owe them the grace of dying by the hand of a friend.”

She blinked. “That is so screwed up.”

He narrowed his eyes. “It’s all that keeps this world safe from rogues, until and unless someone can break that unbreakable cycle. Trust me when I say that you are damn glad we do what we do.”

“I should be glad you murder your friends?” She didn’t understand how he could live with that. That was the same nightmare that haunted her daily, hurting someone she loved, and yet he did it willingly.

“That’s not all we do.” He walked over to her. “Rogue Calydons are so dangerous, that only the elite of our kind can stop them. That’s me, and the rest of the Order. We’re special.”

She didn’t miss the hint of sarcasm in his tone. “How special?”

He rested his hand on the front of her throat, his fingers lightly stroking her skin. “When it’s an Order member who meets his
sheva
, the world can’t afford to have him be the one to die. So, it’s the woman who dies. Every time.”

“Whoa.” She stiffened. “So, it’s already too late? Your friends will hunt me down and kill me, even though nothing has happened? Seriously? Just because you claim I’m you’re
sheva
?” She shoved at him, trying to get his hand off her. God, she just wanted to get out of there. But where would she go? If the Order was after her, they’d find her wherever she went. “Damn you, Quinn! You knew this all along and didn’t tell me!”

“Shit, Grace!” He didn’t budge. “It wasn’t like I had a plan in place to deal with you. I’m in a deadly race of my own right now, and I don’t have time for this shit either. None of us do!” Quinn turned suddenly and threw his fist into the tree, splitting the trunk in half.

“Why don’t you tell Gideon about Elijah being murdered, so he can worry about that instead?”
Yeah, yeah, good idea.
“You guys should be watching out for more illusions instead of worrying about killing me!”

Quinn went still, and he turned to look at her. “I forgot about the illusions. Dammit, I’m not even thinking clearly tonight.” Quinn smacked his palm on the trunk again, then turned back toward her. “Here’s the deal. This shit we’re facing is big, much bigger than Elijah. I can’t screw it up.” He studied her face, and she could sense him falling into battle mode. The eyes that were looking at her were the cold, calculating eyes of a warrior, not the tortured eyes of a man. “You sensed your sister’s illusion before it happened, right?”

“Yeah—” Grace eyed him cautiously. Was this the mode he went into when he killed other Calydons? Was this how his friend would look when he came to kill her? His eyes were dark, his body rigid, his face impassive and cold. It freaked her out how he’d fallen into that role so quickly, as if he’d never kissed her so passionately.

“So, could you tell if someone was working an illusion on me? On my emotions?”

“Oh...” She bit her lip, trying to concentrate on his question. “I could sense a typical illusion for sure, but I don’t know about one that hits directly on your emotions. If it works the same as one of mine, yes. If not...” She shrugged. “I don’t know. I’d guess I could, but I can’t promise.”

He grabbed her shoulders, his fingers digging into her shoulders. “I’m down a weapon, and my enemy has at least one talented Illusionist working for him, and someone’s already tried to have me killed twice.” Anger smoldered in his eyes. “I’d be screwed if I went in blind. I need you to tell me when someone’s hitting me with an illusion. I need your help in battle, sweetheart, and I need you by my side where I can keep you safe from Gideon.”

She stiffened. “So, we have to stay together?” Together meant sex, right? Together meant bonding. Together meant fast-track toward hell. But together also meant a better chance to save her sister.

“Oh, yeah.” His expression was hard, the visage of a warrior focused on his job.

This wasn’t the man who’d picked her up out of the mud and kissed her so passionately she’d melted into his arms. This was the man who’d killed thousands, and had been the one to walk away alive every time. Strategic, deadly and ruthless. She could see how being bound to this man could lead to death. Death followed him.

But she could also see in his eyes a man who would defend her life until the end. With him, she wouldn’t be alone in her battles anymore. The thought scared her, but at the same time, she felt like he’d given her the most precious gift, a gift she didn’t want, but had also yearned for her whole life. A gift that was dangerous, because it would make her weak, if she let it. She had to be strong enough to stand on her own. “If we stay together, then what? What about the bond?”

He caught her wrist, flipped her hand over and pushed up her sleeve. “Look at your forearm.”

She looked at the flush of the brand new skin that had replaced the damage from the burns. “What about it?”

He ran his finger over it. “This is what we watch. When a Calydon warrior and his
sheva
complete their bond, a mirror image of his brand will appear in her forearms. They won’t turn into weapons, but you’d be marked forever as mine.”

She pressed her hand to her arm. “When it appears, it’s too late?”

“It’s gradual, because it takes time for a bond that strong to bind us. There are stages to the process.” He dropped her hand. “All we have to do is keep the bond from fully binding us while we focus on finding Elijah and your sister. Then, after this shit is done, we’ll split up and hope we can stay away from each other.” He jaw was hard. “Destiny will not defeat us.”

“But what about your friend who will track me down and kill me?”

He shrugged. “By then, I’ll have something figured out.”

She shoved her hands into her pockets. “Easy.”

He gave her a grim smile. “Nothing is easy.” He picked up the plastic bag that he’d been carrying earlier. Had he dropped it when he’d been kissing her? “Here are some dry clothes. They’ll be big, but at least they don’t have twenty pounds of mud on them. The clothes in your pack were damp. I’m drying them over the car heater now.” He held it out to her. “There’s a stream over the hill to wash in.”

She was in over her head, but she had no choice. Her sister was all she had left, and she and Quinn had a better chance working together than going it alone. Her sister was worth every risk Grace had to take to save her. Ana had no one else on her side. The police were instructed to kill her. Bounty hunters the same. After a life on the run to protect Grace, Ana had never had the chance to make the friendships she’d craved so badly. She had no one to go after her, no one to believe in her, no one except Grace. Ana had sacrificed everything for Grace, and she would not let her sister down.

Grace took the bag from Quinn. “Okay. I’m in.”
Sheva
and all.

He nodded with grim satisfaction. “My truck’s up and running. We’ll head south to the bar where Elijah was murdered. I need to look around.”

She nodded. As long as they focused on the search for her sister and Elijah, she’d be okay and could concentrate on something other than
him
. “I should be able to pick up some information about my sister there.” She started to turn away, then stopped when Quinn caught her arm. “Don’t touch me,” she whispered, aching at the feel of his fingers on her.

He dropped his hand. “We leave in five minutes. Be prepared to listen to me, use your illusions and hope to get a lead on Elijah and your sister.”

She looked sharply at him. “Use my illusions? I thought you just wanted me to look for them—”

But he’d already disappeared into the woods, blending into the shadows and the sounds of the forest.

She bit her lip as she stared after him. It was one thing to use her talents to sense other illusions. It was something else entirely to call hers up. He’d seen what happened when she did that. He couldn’t have intended it that way... But she had a bad feeling that’s exactly what he’d meant.

Not that she had a choice. She had to find her sister, and teaming up with Quinn Masters was the way to do it. Gripping the bag of new clothes, Grace headed down toward the water to wash off, but she couldn’t help looking over her shoulder, wondering when Gideon was going to come to claim her life.